 i was hoping to do this video outside but now it's starting to rain so we're gonna get back in the car yes in this one we're gonna be talking about why the narcissist stops wanting sex from you because it's strange when they first meet you they first target you they're very into you and it may be more than a normal person it's like they want to have sex all the time it may be two to three times a day or even just once a day either way that's still quite often and it's like they're addicted to you sexually they want to explore all of these fantasies with you they're really into it they're enjoying it they're having a great time and then it's like all of a sudden it stops they're no longer interested they don't want anything to do with you sexually they still keep you as their source of supply they still have you doing other things for them but when it comes to sex it's very dry they just have no interest in it at all and this isn't really something that i can speak from personal experience in all honesty i've never really had the experience of a woman not wanting to have sex with me it's typically being that they've wanted it far more than i ever had and i put that down to me having a very mysterious personality it's like no matter how long someone is with me it's like they never completely know or understand me i'm like this puzzle that they cannot solve so knowing that of course i would assume that it is the opposite in your situation whether narcissist has already learned you they know you they think they've got you all figured out there's nothing more for them to learn so there's no longer this sexual desire you may have had sex already so many times in all different positions you've explored all different fantasies whatever it is that they are into and now it's just lost that spark that excitement and not only that but they may have their rise on someone else so they've just completely lost interest in you sexually they no longer have that desire towards you but of course that's not always the only reason it's not only because they figured you out it may be something where you initiated it and you lost desire in them because they were abusing you and that could be the reason why it may just be you you don't want to be intimately involved with them anymore because they're abusing you and also you may have initiated it you may have avoided sexual contact with them first then of course as we know they retaliate they do the same thing back to you because they want to punish you so they may be playing a game when for you it wasn't a game at all you just didn't like how they were treating you and even when you have sex with them they're still so self-absorbed it's all about them it's all about their needs and sometimes a lot of narcissists they are addicted to pornography but even with narcissistic women it may just be a sex toy a vibrator and they may actually prefer that rather than having sex with you because you've got to look at it like this you are just one person they can get bored of that very easily but with pornography it's like their playground they can tune into this other world and explore all of their sexual fantasies and narcissists they're so immersed in it it's like their brain doesn't know the difference between that and real life so a lot of times yes you're not only competing with other men or other women but you're also competing with pornography as well which in fact could be far more competitive than a person in real life because with pornography as I said they can explore all of their sexual fantasies that's very difficult for one person to compete with but let's talk about how we can change the situation because of course I understand it must be very frustrating for you especially if you are married to this person or you're at least in a very committed relationship and you're meant to be loyal to them so you don't really have any other options it's not like you can just go off and have sex with someone else but what you can do is it's a little bit naughty but you can try talking to someone of the opposite sex maybe someone who you already know they're not going to like it it's going to make them jealous but it's going to get their attention as well because this is the thing with narcissists in a way they actually like it when you resist them when they know they can have you and you're right there they can have sex with you whenever they want they don't really care about it so you kind of have to use this reverse psychology and act like you don't really care about having sex with them so you pull away and then let them see you talk to someone else just an instant conversation they're very possessive and controlling so that will be enough hopefully to make them desire you sexually again and aside from that you also just need to play into their sexual fantasies I mean if you know that they're watching pornography maybe you've caught them watching it I mean I don't advise going through someone's stuff going through their internet history of course that's not healthy I don't advise anyone to do that but let's just say you caught them watching it then you can try and use that to seduce them try to play out their sexual fantasies in real life try to wear sexier outfits maybe start going to the gym or working out get into shape you need to tailor yourself to their sexual needs you need to make it fresh and new again because the problem is a lot of times it's got an old as I said they've already had sex with you so many times in so many different positions they're just bored of it now they already know exactly what's going to happen they know exactly how it's going to end so there's just no fun about it there's no mystery there's no excitement I mean the excitement in sex a lot of times it comes from not knowing not knowing what's going to happen and even at times not knowing if you can sexually satisfy the other person so you don't want to be an open book as well you need to be more mysterious but yes you will experience this with narcissists and it is completely normal it's nothing out of the ordinary at all narcissists they are very difficult to entertain sexually over a long period of time they're easily distracted by other things and it's like in the beginning they desire so much if you've got attention they want to have sex with you every day and then it's just a matter of time until they get bored they start devaluing you they start blaming you for everything they abuse you and then you may even stop desiring sex from them so yeah I understand I know what you're going through I mean as I said I've never experienced this myself it was typically the women that I've dealt with they always wanted sex a lot more than I ever wanted it I mean sometimes two to three times a day which is more than enough for me but I do understand it and I think for my situation it's more that I was more mysterious I was like this puzzle that they couldn't solve I didn't reveal too much about myself but yeah that's really what you've got to do just try to tailor yourself to their sexual fantasies I mean they're obviously desiring something narcissists cannot just go without sex I mean just like any person really if you're in a relationship or marriage they're gonna be watching pornography or they're gonna have their eyes on someone else and that is where their attention is going towards and they just see these other things as more sexually enticing than you so you really need to change that up you need to switch the game around and make it so that they are desiring you more so that's really it that's why they stop having sex with you it's not really that complicated although I understand narcissists can be complex beings but what I would say as well is and I know you know many of you you're in long-term relationships marriages but why would you want sex from someone who doesn't even want sex with you I mean I know it's difficult to just abstain from it all together but you've got to look at it like that as well you've got to have that perspective because I know for me what I like the most is when someone sexually desires me I mean if it's someone who they're not really interested in me I'm not really their type then I don't really want anything to do with them as well I mean the best part for me is knowing that someone is sexually attracted to me otherwise there's just no point and it's difficult with narcissists sometimes I mean you have to change so much about yourself to make yourself sexually attractive to them and sometimes it's not even worth it I mean sex is a very important part of a relationship and if your sexual needs are not being met I do believe that a lot of times that is enough to end the relationship even if you're not dealing with a narcissist because they should be interested in you they should have this desire to satisfy you if they don't then something is seriously wrong it's completely unnatural if you're taking good care of yourself you're a sexually attracted person and this person is not sexually attracted to you they're not trying to have sex with you but that is enough for you to end the relationship in my opinion because someone else they could be sexually attracted to you they could meet your sexual needs your emotional needs as well so you need to have standards you need to have expectations and don't let them play it down as well don't let them shame you for having these sexual needs there is nothing wrong with that at all it's a very important part of life it's a part of what makes us human and it is a very important part of a relationship and of a marriage so we need to look at this maturely and in a responsible way yes they will blame you and shame you but that doesn't change how it actually is so you need to stand your ground on that and if they're still not interested in you they're not desiring you sexually there isn't too much you can do about it and there is enough for you to want to end the relationship which a lot of times yes that would be what I would advise you to do because as I said sex is a very important part of a marriage or even a relationship if you're not having sex with them and you're just there you're just doing all of these things for them that's not right you're just being used you're being cheated so you need to get out of there and find a more fulfilling situation or relationship for you where you will feel sexually satisfied because of course I can understand that though I've never been through it myself I'm sure that it must be very sexually frustrating I mean it must irritate you and of course we can all understand that's not a nice feeling to experience at all and they will try to shame you for that well they've got their eyes on someone else so they're watching pornography or whatever they're doing and yet they're coming to you and trying to shame you when they can't even satisfy you sexually I mean sometimes you just got to look at it the other way around what are they doing for you and yes they should be held to some standard expectation since you're meant to be in this committed relationship so you need to look at it that way as well but also don't be too tight about it don't be too serious I mean remember relationships sex it's supposed to be fun it's not supposed to be all of the seriousness and when you're coming at it like that and you're like pointing the finger at them and you're blaming them for not wanting sex with you that's not going to make the situation better as well you need to be more seductive more enticing you need to tailor yourself to their sexual needs their fantasies while also not trying to change too much about yourself but don't be afraid to role play cosplay can be fun as well so all of these things you need to take into account you need to consider these things as well if you want to have a healthy sexual relationship with the narcissist but of course it's never going to be completely healthy because they do have these insatiable desires and they're never going to be fully satisfied they're always going to get bored at some point and they're always going to have their eyes somewhere else so in the end the best thing you can do is just avoid them you may not be able to satisfy them but I'm sure you can satisfy someone else and they will be there for you sexually as well so yeah so important things to take into consideration and if you found this video helpful you can give it a thumbs up down below let me know your thoughts in the comments as well let me know if you agree with this or not and you can share the video hit the subscribe button down below and click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos and if you'd like to book a one-on-one coaching session with me you can do that from my website it is narcsurvivor.co.uk and also I do have my Instagram as well I've got new pictures and videos of my travels every day on there it is narcsurvivor youtube on Instagram so you can follow me on there now other than that that's what I've got to say for this topic but I will do more videos on this topic very soon thank you all for watching and as always I'll talk to you in another one very soon