 can I just say thank you to my team for being so amazing in the morning hours yes thank you so very much and can we please say a very big hallelujah and a man January is almost over it is the 29th day of out of 72 in January it is almost time to say goodbye and approach a very very favorite season of mine it's almost Valentine my name is Valentine or it's on everything and today we're having a man talk to guys like mean ladies a book of course wait for from Facebook quite for channel on Twitter hashtag is white in the morning but come come let us say hi to my panelist how are you excuse me please smile I have not spent all that energy to introduce you in awesome thank you hi orangutan long time no see of course opinion please tell them who you are in case they see me for the first time political analyst a political commentator I do cater and a motivational speaker I like okay social media handles Facebook Instagram all right welcome back thank you so much hi Queen hi what is your lovely I'm favorite or ghetto please you have to give them time to understand favorite like she's my favorite right yeah my mom's favorite by the way yeah I'm a student at MKU yeah I'm a journalist yeah my Facebook handle is Jerry Fave Instagram is Jerry Fave all right and Twitter is at Jerry Fave please don't be afraid of my Kings they're very nice okay thank you so hi you're looking very sharp sharp thank you very much yeah well they called me Simon Masila but you can find me on Twitter as Simon Madea Instagram Selah Madea well I'm a journalist and also defend of the boy child ah yeah wow who is your commander in chief commander in chief is Lieutenant General Cyprien Nyakund very loyal it just had to be oh anyway to pay to shout out happy no yeah bro yeah I tried for fun on Facebook what for turn out with a hashtag is white in the morning I tell me guys do you like mean ladies mean by the way definition of this word mean city and I couldn't be precise not means does not mean stingy it just means I couldn't matter how flan him as a like Kimonga Lesha unless he a charge in Asia come really like she's draining and draining and it's all the time all the time maybe that's how she shows affection but I couldn't matter how basically so how would you how would you approach it we'll need them and a couple a sura Nini muley okay dog dog away I don't keep salami at all my to see I'm not salami a day I'm not going to come to salami I don't need me cut to even a demivive you knock on as a Ford couldn't say me okay this is it people need to grow people need to grow that is one and you must learn to accommodate for that instance that you just mentioned it means that it tells a lot about your personality because in exchanging you learn from from experience we get knowledge about you from this knowledge maybe you can grow I sing in terms of only people so when you give me a wall I think that is bad that is creating a hindrance good so what kind of lady would would you prefer as opposed to I need somebody's open-minded somebody who can take something in reflect on it then reciprocate because Kani Matusi to badu Kani Matusi I have to sort myself out of course you can't abuse me when my intention or my intent is to be good to you so be good to people and things everything they we say life is a flow so once you find your flow there's no need to be me good I want no no no no wait wait he answers yeah boy child representative yeah do you like a mean girl first of all when you find a meal I mean girl that means that the girl has no respect for you and as for boy child usually want I want my woman to respect me as a man because I'm the boy in the relationship so when you find a woman being mean to you especially if it's your woman do you know that's how those that's how men are provoked because you can't just stand and abuse a month or let's see long as the man can decide maybe to just leave you alone he goes if I'm so less somewhere else maybe with someone else so less so you see so you have to be be good to your man but as for my girlfriend she can be mean to all the other men outside there really don't care it's okay as long as she has but as for me like a real well line guys I a real well line quite serious just enough okay but I'd like to think or I'd like to imagine African men have funny double standard yes true very funny double standard tell us to wear skirts that's a surgery below the knee or just that the knee and then the import Pakistani belly dancers for the news for a very long time so you say you want someone who's respectful to you then your wife and then keep wife at home but you will also go side and see money and I'm gonna be on a disk here who's young a little bit on a job in any little relation any vote you guys don't like that please don't like to me don't do it no there's something that I think it is something to do with the moral corruption at personal level because because the moment you you differentiate what is at home and what is whatever you want it to be I think that is the point we start missing it at because if at all you have to instill respect into this lady and you receive this respect but it's still respect no no no let me finish feel free to come let me finish because you can't receive what you don't so or you don't trip what you don't so that we're don't change but the characters we tried to change like I don't believe nobody was born naturally rude yes sometimes men confuse me a lot at one point men say that when they ask out a lady and she says yes at the first instant she's cheap she's so easy and here you think that you don't want somebody rude what do you want I don't understand what men really want they should tell us this what I have to say we confuse the Faberbank the Faberbank is well now we you'll come with your pride your status quo whatever you are but the Faberbank has nothing it what the Faberbank produces is a climate where we can be helpful to others at any given time which means it is a circle help you help me so there's no room for this meanness of creating a unlimited capacity for both of us there's a point we reach and other consensus I think that is it all these others that we want to bring in terms of preference I think those are fevers good well I want to come back to her statement I see say that first of all there's a very difference between hard let's say hard-headed mean mean for example let's say when I'm approaching a girl you know I have to experience the the thrill of the hunt and I think I need you try you try so that when you finally get it you'll be like really proud of yourself when we try to make you try hard you see we are mean no it depends on how you push the person off let's say you don't have to be rude as in any just push him away a little bit but don't be mean as in any calling calling the man names as in being mean is just lack of respect doesn't only mean that words and exchanging words or maybe Matusi it means a lot maybe the look and okay sometimes people can look you know we that you say and I'm gonna mother how you see no I don't know what you guys want went long earlier softly you say she's easy to get and when took you and I hear the other way you say that mother nothing as easy to get you see for example when two people like each other even though you say yes the first time I'll be very happy to just you just made my work easier so we can still push it but let's say but then back in the mind you're like maybe yes she said yes to me the first moment I say I I asked her out what about other men she'll say yes to the other man now you see that's why we try to put that in Kamada Raoka dog so that you see that we don't usually that assumption as in you assume in your head that since you said yes very quickly I'll judge you to be easy but now once you say yes I'll sit down get to know you and then I'll know your character I can't just assume someone's character you have to learn the person so never assume it just because you said yes easily everyone thinks you're easy it's never that way Byron has something say but before you do that want to define arrogance arrogance is okay the synonyms are hotness conceit and he was like basically easy but okay I I don't mean to to create a stereotype but I want to take this a little bit cultural reference there's a particular culture that is known for Susi Kiburi but one of the jibba and they know who they are and they are not ashamed of what they own and and the kind of lifestyle that they live and the people who find that attractive you know I think it is why is it how you perceive it really the next person sees you because you have to work on yourself and steam you know your work so somebody cannot just bring you down because you know what you are that is one two in the way that you also carry up yourself there people will not everybody has to accept you at the end of the day because we are not there for everybody as well it's true so I would like to say that it may be situations for you to be defined in such a manner and maybe at that particular time that this is coming up or this is copying in between and the other person but I really think that regardless we have to improve on our personalities and we know when to be rude and not to be arrogant but what happened to love me the way I am if I'm just rude I've been rude all my life my parents have allowed me to be rude all the schools that I was just rude and I got a now you don't know it's going to come to me to be not now if you if you love a person you have to change also for the person why can't you change what you can handle no let's see why why is it how changing and accommodate the little you our relations is a 50-50 affair I'll give in my part you give in your part so why you think that the girls will change thanks I'll also change according to in some way why can't you change for the girl because you also fell for her for her why can't we change for all of us we change for each other yeah we change all of us there's no need of only one person putting in the effort so if we change I'll try to accommodate some of the things but the things which accommodate a little as long as it doesn't reach the limit you know you know of course the first time you'll get a one in you'll get a one in the second time I the second time I'll remind you of the other time is when you're I like that you're honest sir men change with times and seasons they are good and flexible just learn to understand what they want this minute and the next minute easy one reason why we men we can look for sidekicks is because of the arrogance that these other person is constantly putting me into okay and wait Byron there's so many things I want to say with that just one say so many things just say one and that one is what we're talking about why our mean lady is always angry because now he's saying the reason why side side different levels guys my levels have changed so men she can as a be your fault that she's so mean yeah are you the one making her maybe you not treating her right you know there are men who do everything for the ladies they love the men chicks but they don't realize they don't appreciate so this guy will go there at least she wears the pants in the house okay that's that but now we see one let me tell you something some good ways mean also ladies one she will have a problem with the character that is one number two she won't define when she is on the limit ends the boundary lines so when you're pushed as for me I'm talking for myself see is it because I scare you because there's a limit to turn into a beast so I'll keep that beast face from you and that energy I'll shift it to somebody else so I'll maintain you at your space so that I don't really get to hurt you because you would stay you would stay with this person who if it is not serious I'll kick you out now you see to his point also one thing that really pushes men away from their homes for example you get a nagging wife there's nothing which it retains a man more than a nagging wife an ugly wife nagging nagging yeah yeah case what is so funny a nagging wife so you see now for example if I come home to a nagging wife as in you're supposed to come home you get your a good wife and you just feel good as in that way you can never go said but now once you figure home is this this and that's you must she does you have to wait has it had it figures a point as a man you just get out of the house because once you reach your limit you can't control yourself and you can do some bad things so I stand to be corrected but to the extent that you're in a relationship and a relationship it's serious when you're living together yeah right and then she's still angry she'll find out why always I mean why is she like that you should you should try to learn her you should not just jump into conclusion she's mean and she's always angry she's bad so I should look for sidekick now you should try to look for the background I mean sit with her with her and ask her why always why you always like this yeah try to know her I want to ask you a question I agree with you actually boy child I am with you boy child simply because I've changed levels now see I deal with kings so kings help me deal with boy child yeah they help me understand what the problem is down here I understand you want to be appreciated and I think we do we should appreciate you more often however okay why like you know just appreciate your person first we will take off your shoes oh we will wash your feet in the sitting room if you want we will brush your teeth if that's what you want talk to her the truth pick me I may come up oh you can imagine how much I'm going to do but not as you find one thing in a strong relationship like that there has to be communication and in most cases there's no man who can argue that lady is angry as in any whatever you say you can't just you usually just sit down and then you take it in when you try to give out your story have you ever heard the saying that there is this article I read somewhere the son told his father he was gay he was going he was going to get married and then the father started telling the son apologize apologize apologize now the son was just I apologize for what I apologize for when finally the son gave up and said I'm sorry the father told the son you are not ready to get married this is what your wife will be taking you through but now as you see now you can't communicate with a person like that even though you know she's on the wrong you just have to sit back she's always right take it especially as you see now and now ask for example now if you're always right and I also want to massage my male ego why can't I go and find someone who will tell me that you are right yeah you're the man yeah all right very good we need our egos to be massaged takes us to the next question are you less of a man if you cannot handle a woman with an explosive personality so I am trying to or what the question is trying to ask is for example favorite was the one who's a bit of a woman then you go say hi accordingly so if if you cannot handle her does that make you less of a man does that mean that you lost that is not that is not losing and I think that should be a motivation for you to at least advance yourself for the next person because maybe sometimes you see always it is also good also to avoid problems because maybe maybe let us assume we're in a social place and there's a caliber the flag is raised somewhere yeah embarrassing me so she has killed you but you got the guts to now go and say your word so you will evaluate yourself am I worth what are the possible outcomes if you not up to it don't go you said very strongly that he's yeah he's weak because there's no tag on ladies which says she's mean she's not mean you see so when you leave that woman because she's mean or always angry you go to the next what if you find she's the same so you should handle what you have better than they say better the devil you know that than the angel you don't know yes you better learn how to handle the one you have I don't agree with that on this perspective because if if the devil I know is always that constant but constantly bad you want to cut the devil you don't know yes I'll give it a sheet or a risk I'll take that risk and at least learn something new and this is it when your loving curve is too stiff you crash so one I'll me I'll compromise you for another person because we don't most of the time and you ladies you tend you tend to take as you are always on the lower side because if there's a situation it is for the man to take the lower side so that at least you remain who you are so once I take my lower side even if I'm not wrong but you constantly take this as a weakness for me really and even to the point that I'm trying to express myself that whatever we are doing or whatever you're trying to do is not up to my expectations and and there's nothing bad like being in a relationship whereby even compliments are not there you start a conversation it is already a war you start this it is a good example there you can't even go hang out with your friends look at that it is always her first and when you try to bring into the picture she she's just out of topic so that also one thing let me add one thing on the equation before you move on you see as a as a guy for example this is the message to ladies when you are when a guy approaches you it's not a mass you become me even though you don't want the guy just quickly as he just put him off in a very polite way just tell him I'm dating him you can tell him I'm not in a I'm not looking for a relationship right now that is a man who is provoked to do there's this this thing called you tell him politely no I'm dating yeah how come remember what what no no if you tell a guy politely the guy won't have any the guy won't stop like that in such a situation whereby I politely say I'm always polite by the way I say no I can't give him another cause I'm dating now you see but why is it okay for you guys to speak like that like but damn when she's that vulgar when she's that mean because when you're going to this lady first of all this is the first time we're meeting this person sometimes I can't be nice during the first instance and that is normal give this lady her space but again it is rude of you to deny somebody one hour because you're dating do you know this person can give you job the next minute so one one thing we should look at is to be open minded and welcoming because I once approached a lady was face wise she was very cruel but when are you actually she was very cruel face wise very cruel very very very determined and I said no let me say hi when I hi she was very nice I said oh so not everybody likes these people are different so to the point that you said that you should not deny people your number will you appreciate your girlfriend going around giving every man who asks her number since she has to be nice since she has to be nice and she gives her number to every man and your number is not a job opportunity yeah at the end of the day we are social people we have to socialize your girlfriend including taking including giving out numbers to every man who asks for it if you find if you find your friends you two are dating you only have your friends yeah if you're a snitch we'll die with the food in your mouth when you see the point of giving out numbers you can give out your number but now as a girl you know you have principles that that even though you give out your number it will never come to that state or know you're cheating on your money see now good no no no no wait wait wait you have to be you have to be very principled the first thing you say many things have first you know i don't know what i think just no no no no no no not say that to see for a lady you have your principle and you give out your number you won't be relating to that because you know principles won't tell the other people don't text me whatever you want to text me they'll text you whatever they want to text you and then when the boyfriend sees them he's like who is this texting you this and why is he texting you these you must have but i do city That is so rude of the boy or the man doing that. Why would you snitch into a lady's phone? What are you looking at today? Oh my gosh, goza, goza. Why would I? If I trust you, by the way, this is where we fail. We fail to initiate or to ignite effective trust with our partners. If at job I can really stabilize our cognitive trust in terms of competence, what we can do, support it. Why can't I build that effective trust with my girlfriend? I like that thinking. So one thing I want us to say and agree. It doesn't matter. The entire nation can have your number. I don't care. But we singe na madara ukwa in whatever we do, like you found some good guy to go by. If you think you're graduating into the next level, tell me. I'll give you that space. Go on. Because at the end of the day, people must go. If that is going to help you grow, go ahead. But if you're going to lose and come back, no. I'm not testing what I'm saying. I'm not testing what I'm saying. Test as you go. Don't test and come home. But even you guys say, you can't take chicken every day. Drink to your fate if you want to take. You want to take food. I don't know what I'm saying. I want to take food. I want to take food. I don't know what I'm saying. I want to take food. It's the same thing. So to his point, if you are a girl and you know that you have principles, I don't care whether you give everyone your number. As long as you know I am your man, and there are limits here. You're not supposed to cross some lines. You sneak into it. I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. Do you have a boyfriend? I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. Well, there's this notion that I realize. Ladies, not these. They won't ask if you are in a serious relationship. They won't. They will assume you have a girlfriend, but it is not serious. So they'll try to create a space for themselves so that they call time alternates to establish whatever it is going. Is it true? They call time alternates. If she calls you at 7, say, I'm going to pick you up at 7. Third time, I'm going to pick you up at good night. By 22 hours, Pianta, I just forgot. Look at that. So what we need to do is to be in a relationship which will be at the first. We should be very patriotic in terms of our duties in this relationship. We should be honest as well so that the vice has to do with the meaning of, no, that's normal. That gives me, I think, but I don't know what I'm saying. There's a meme for ati. So say, boy, tell them it's you two up or ati, when your girlfriend men the club and everyone is trying to hit on your girlfriend, but you're not at home, so I'm relaxed. And then it will be terrible. I know where she's going after this. So you want to go home? You want showing her off? I don't know what you're trying to do, but that's a little too much. Well, it depends. I'm going to have a chocolatey story. It depends because, OK, fine. Why don't I take you somewhere if I don't want you to enjoy? Hey, do chase it, dance. I'll be watching you. I got your back. But let it not exceed what I expect. What do you expect? I expect, at least after dancing, if they were making advances at you there, that's where you are dancing there. So we don't do this here? Let it remain there. Don't come with it back to the table. Boundaries. There are these kind of men who are so, OK, they're so touchy. You dancing, he's touching you all over. Are you fine seated there, watching your girl being touched there? You're excited. No, those are things. She's not supposed to be. You see, some guys are just savages. Nicely, they have given you the chance to dance with that. What are you touching? Dance, if it is, they are dance. OK, after dance, if we people, we are not socially, we don't develop some of the things I'll call social etiquettes. Somebody has given you, for instance, but I don't know. Maybe you are in the same club where I am. I've seen, I've introduced you to some of my friends. Then up on the dance floor, I'm a hit on you. This guy doesn't even know who you are. I've just introduced you. So he's taking leverage on that. Then I'll talk to him. Opportunity. Look at that. It's stupid. And also for a lady, for example, I'm your man, I'm seated at the table. I've given you space to go and dance. And then a guy comes and starts touching you, as he is touching, touching you. You want to tell me you don't have in your clear mind to, let's say, throw the guy's hands away. Now that's being wrote. You can even stab him. Wait, wait. Now that's being wrote. Maybe I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. OK. Stand up. I go and now meet up with a guy telling me, why are you disturbing my woman? OK. But you have to put in air force. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt. But we could also spin it like this before we get to the next question. Assuming they're in the same club. Yes, it's the same. Very right. White 5-4 on Facebook. At White 5-4 channel on Twitter. Hashtag is why in the morning. So let's twist it a little bit. So what happens if you're in the same club, eh? So you're with your girl. You're having a good time. And then there's a brother somewhere in the periphery who wants to shower your girl with champagne. He sells four bottles. Not even glass. You're not even asked what you want. They just bring the most expensive thing on the menu. Now we're going to say, no, take it back. It's rude. I don't want it because I'm with my wife. No, Val. That's what you want us to do. No, no, no. But like to see what it's chopped, we're not going to do that. We're not going to do that. OK, fine. This is my policy. One, I won't take you out when I don't have enough for extra. But expensive, I should afford it. OK, but there's always someone who's always going to have a problem with it, always. But there's a boundary. You know, Val, for him to date somebody, even if it's for one week, you will have established that this guy I'm dating, this is the kind of person he is. So if that champagne comes, why should it be stored for you to just say the truth as it is? I have enough for, I'm catered for. And also, one thing for me, what I can say about it, when champagne comes to the table. What do you want to do to stay much? He wants me to drink the cake. I'm a person who doesn't have fragile masculinity. What do I tell the waiter to take a glass of beer? Good job. I like that one. And then me and my daughter would chop those champagne together. As in I didn't tell the waiter. Go and tell those guys over there. Thank you. You must say, but now me and my girlfriend have to go. Thank you. And then even stop using my money. I'll chop that champagne very well. All right, guys, our time is running out. Let me just read one more question. We had, has the girl child been too empowered for her own good? We had that question. But there's no feedback that I just want to read real quick. I am a victim of this topic. And many other friends of mine. I have a lot of money. And I have a lot of money. I have a lot of accounts. Oh, yeah. Out of 10, I have only met one lady who treated me for lunch, Xavier from Ember. Gotea Saimo. Xavier and Wanda feeling aggrieved by women. Ne, ne, ne. Poor child. Where does it hurt? Tell us then we'll try and fix it, OK? And then the last one. We don't remember Nakashi's relationship. I'm sick of it, bro. I'm sick of it, bro. That's White 5 on Facebook at White 5 on Twitter. Hashtag is one in the morning. Today, we were asking if guys like me, ladies, like a mother-in-law, like a mother-in-law, if you want to go out with me, I'm sick of it. Let's wind this up. Give me your last remarks, sir. For my last remarks, guys, you don't have to be mean to everyone. If you don't feel like I just push him off lightly. And also, if you like a guy, give me some clues so that I don't give up easily. Yes, ma'am. If you want a boy like a girl, the boy tells her. But when a girl likes the boy, she waits for the Holy Spirit to tell me. You don't have to say you like me. Just give me a clue, a small kind, and then I attack. You shall add in. I want you to finish first, sir. Byron? OK, OK. But what I have to say is that let us be welcoming. Let us be good. And let us also learn to create further space, even if we don't like them to the extent that they can be really close to us. Because I think a lot can happen. Because you cannot be my friend. You cannot like me, but there's something we can do together outside what I'd intended to do with you. All right, thank you, Pa. OK, I think we should be open-minded. When the mother comes, put it there. When the child comes, of course, you don't have to be rude every minute of your life. You can be good at times, but when it's necessary, take that chance. Yeah, gosh, I think I have the exact opposite. That was marvelous. That was marvelous, good. Byron says you should put it up. I think I know what you want to hear. I tell you, be nice all the time. Look at the mother and come by the way. Die a motosie, motosize me, OK? Come sign and I'll bend it, too. One of you has to come and say, you can be nice. So turn and bend one of them, look that out. Have a good day. I try to perform Facebook at Y254channel on Twitter. Hashtag is one of the morning. My name is Valentine. I'm at Ovala, Punjab. Can you understand me? So have a good day, let's wave, guys. Bye.