 Proverbs 19 will begin reading at verse 1. I'll read to verse 4 and again go through each one of these Proverbs individually beginning at verse 1 Proverbs 19. Better is the poor who walks in his integrity than one who is perverse in his lips and is a fool. Also it is not good for a soul to be without knowledge, and he sins who hastens with his feet. The foolishness of a man twists his way and his heart frets against the Lord. Wealth makes many friends, but the poor is separated from his friend. So as we begin notice at verse 1 how he says better. Better is the poor who walks in his integrity. Better comparatively is the poor person who has integrity than the one who is perverse. The word perverse is one who distorts the truth. And so better is the poor who walks in his integrity. The word integrity speaks of completeness or innocence or even simplicity. Better is the financially poor person who walks in simplicity, integrity, wholeness than the one who's perverse, the one who is distorting the truth and is a fool who thinks that riches will buy them the things that matter in life. Better is a poor person who understands what life is all about even though he doesn't or she doesn't have any money than the one who has a lot of money and thinks that riches will buy them the things that matter. And so the point he's making is simple follow the way of honesty even if it ends up in physical poverty because an honest life is a better life. Proverbs 15 verse 16 says better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure with trouble. Jesus asked a question in Matthew 16 26 what profit is it to a man if he gains a whole world and loses his own soul. Then he asked the question or what will a man give in exchange for his soul. So follow the way of honesty even if it ends up in physical poverty. Verse two also it is not good for a soul to be without knowledge. He sins who hastens with his feet. It is not good for a soul to be without knowledge. The word knowledge when he says without knowledge speaks of the person who's unable to discern right from wrong. And this is a person who will choose the wrong path. So it is better to have the ability to choose the right path. He says in verse two he sins who hastens with his feet. So that speaks of a zeal without proper knowledge. That speaks of someone who makes unwise and hasty decisions. And so it's not good for us to be without knowledge because knowledge informs our decision making. Verse three the foolishness of a man twists his way. His heart frets against the Lord. The sinfulness of his heart is what has been referred to when it says a foolishness. The sinfulness of his heart and his sinful nature causes him to resist God and causes him to resist God's directions. It's interesting how in Romans chapter three God says there is none who seeks after him. The Bible teaches that we have a sin nature. A sin nature that is in constant hostile opposition to God. A nature that is at war with God. And so the foolishness of a man twists his way. His heart frets against the Lord. It's a sinfulness of his heart and his nature causes him to resist the Lord and the Lord will speak to him especially we know now through the gospel and will call that person to salvation and and they will resist him and they resist the direction that God gives through scripture and by his spirit. And the result is is when their life is not blessed when it's ruined they blame God for that. In Ezekiel 1825 it says yet you say the Lord isn't doing what's right. Listen to me old people of Israel. Am I the one not doing what's right? Or is it you? There are a lot of people today who who get mad at God. You know that. You talk to them. They're mad at God. God didn't treat me right. If God was so good why did he allow? You know that's not that God isn't good. It's that I'm not good. It's not that God isn't righteous. It's it's without him. I'm not righteous. And it's not that God's plans for me are bad. It's my own plans that are bad. And when I realize that and I did that through the gospel, I did that through the conviction of the Holy Spirit. When I came to realize that and I committed my ways to the Lord, he began to lead me in the right path. And so people who aren't following the Lord have a tendency of blaming God for the things that they do them to themselves. Verse four. Wealth makes many friends. But the poor is separated from his friend. Isn't that the truth? When he says wealth makes many friends the word wealth. When he uses the word wealth, it speaks of abundance. And so people always run to the ones who have an abundance. They always run to the one who's willing to buy the dinner that night or to pay for whatever it is that everybody's going to be enjoying. So that just speaks of life's realities. People have a tendency of following after someone with money, because they really want to get something from them. And so why would they make friends with somebody who can't benefit them? So they avoid the poor. Because the poor have nothing to give. Proverbs 14 20 says the poor man is hated even by his own neighbor. But the rich has many friends. Verse five. A false witness will not go unpunished. And he who speaks lies will not escape. When he speaks of a false witness, we could speak of that as a perjurer. And it seems that perjurers may get away with it sometimes. But a perjurer may get away with lying in court. But he does not get away with lying when it comes to eternity, because he stands before a judge that will not believe his lies or her lies. Matthew 12 36 and 37. Jesus said, I say to you that every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words, you will be justified. By your words, you will be condemned. So Jesus is understood here as condemning all false and injurious words. And we need to be aware of that. Verse six. Many entreat the favor of the nobility. And every man is a friend to one who gives gifts. We saw a similar thought just a moment ago. But let's look at that for just a minute. Many entreat the favor of the nobility. Every man is a friend to one who gives great numbers of people seek the friendship of influential and wealthy people. That's true. We know that they will seek after the ones who can get them ahead. So what do they do? They seek after wealthy and they seek after influential because they hope that somehow they may benefit from this powerful person, especially if the person is in involved in making decisions concerning the career that that person may be choosing. So they want to be close to somebody who can help them achieve their ends. And and so they entreat the favor of the nobility and and they make a friend to the one who gives. And so what happens though, is sometimes these people with power and influence will use their power to injure other people. And they do that. They buy people things in order that they might buy that person. But we need to remember a person you can buy isn't worth pursuing. But sometimes these people will put up with things that they really ought not to because they think if they put up with these things that they ultimately will get ahead. We saw that not long ago and it's still going on right now in the news concerning actresses and people in in what we used to call show business, the arts and all how they are now coming out saying that particular high powered producers took advantage of them and it created a movement and all of us have heard of it. If you watch the news, read the newspaper, whatever it's called the me to movement, all of you've heard that where someone came out and said such an so powerful person took advantage of me and then you have several others come up and they said that happened to me too. And now you have a movement of people all saying this happened. And as this has taken place, I was thinking it is always wrong. Of course, they take advantage of somebody by using your power and influence and buying them and abusing them. Of course, that's wrong. But at the same time, I thought, it's interesting how how this has been going on for as long as I've been alive. And I know it's gone on longer than that. There was a term that used to be used that still is used and people used to think it was a fiction. And it's not it's called the casting couch, where a person who is wanting a role in a particular show or in a movie would end up being seduced in somebody's office and also that they could be guaranteed a place or a part of a movie and all of that. Everybody is aware of that. Everybody knew about that. And yet only recently people are finally admitting to it. When in fact, it was an open secret in Hollywood forever. And what is interesting to me and I won't beat this horse too long is people are acting like they're shocked. And that that amazes me because that was a common open secret for so long that that people would take advantage of other people. You know, I'm horrified by that. No, it actually happens. We know that. And very often it's abusive men who take advantage of women and all. But what caused me to to take a moment to think about how things were working themselves out is the ones who stood up and began this quote unquote moving by saying things were were people who, you know, said they were victimized sometimes 30 plus years ago. And all this time they never said a thing. And so I began to wonder about the sincerity of such a claim. Not that it didn't happen. But why did you wait so long? Why did you wait 30 years? Why did you wait 35 years? If you'd have stood up at the beginning, it said something when it was happening. Why didn't you? And it's normally because if they would have said something, then they wouldn't have gotten a role that they wanted. And so now that they're not needing those roles, or perhaps they've grown age wise, the roles that they used to have. Now they're speaking. So I had a real problem with that because it should have been stated a long time ago. So people have a tendency of going to those who have power and influence. But sometimes the ones who have power and influence use their power and influence to abuse those people. And so we need to be aware of that. Even as he's saying again in verse six, many entreat the favor of the nobility. Every man's a friend to one who gives gifts. Verse seven, all the brothers of the poor hate him. How much more do his friends go far from him? He may pursue them with words. Yet they abandon him. Relatives and superficial friends want nothing to do with you when you're poor is what he's saying. You have nothing of value that they can get from you. See even your brothers and superficial friends will abandon you. Verse eight, he who gets wisdom loves his own soul. He who keeps understanding will find good. So notice how he says he who gets wisdom, the word get, the word get means to seek after or pursue. The word get is referring to taking pains or sacrificing for something. You are laboring. So he who gets wisdom. So the getting of wisdom is something that requires you to seek after or pursue. It's something that requires sacrifice. It requires work or labor. So he who labors after seeks after wisdom loves his own soul. He who keeps understanding will find good. The word keeps means guards or faithfully observes. It speaks of faithfully practicing, carefully practicing, pursuing and practicing wisdom is the right way to love your soul. This is the proper love for yourself. Seeking something that lasts. See, there is a self love that is built on me getting something right now. We've been looking at 2 Timothy and in chapter three, the sign that he speaks concerning the last days as men will be lovers of self. But there is a proper way to love self. When you love your own soul, you're actually getting understanding in order that you may not prosper simply here on earth, but that your eternity will be secure in the things of God. You'll go to heaven. So he says, if you're actually seeking after this kind of knowledge, you're seeking after something that has eternal value. And so pursuing wisdom and practicing the things that you learn is the right way to love your soul. It is the proper love for yourself. It is the diligent and disciplined pursuit of the spiritually abundant life. It's valuing the eternal, correctly recognizing what actually constitutes life. What does constitute life? Well, we've been looking at some things here. He's speaking about wealth. He's speaking about how wealth will buy people and influence and all of that. What does our life consist of? Jesus said a man's life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses. My life isn't made up by the material things that I have. The house I have, the car I have, or any material thing. We know that philosophically, but this is something that songs have been written about where we pursue the wrong thing. I was thinking about this as I was looking at this and preparing the study today, and I was looking at how we are to diligently and in a disciplined way pursue something that is spiritual that our lives might have the abundance that Christ promised. I couldn't help it. I took a trip down memory Boulevard, and I remembered an old song. None of you have heard. Some of you have, but you're so old you probably forgot it. So let me remind you, it was a song from I don't even remember when, but I remembered it was called Mr. Businessman. And I don't know how many of you have ever even heard that title, but allow me for a moment. Because in the lyrics, as I was thinking about this, and I was looking at this scripture and it says, he who gets wisdom loves his own soul, and I was looking at and reading my commentators and considering this passage, and it's pointing out that there's a proper way to love your soul. You love your soul in the sense that you do the things that are pleasing to God, and you have an abundance of life through Jesus Christ, who said to us that he has come that we might have life in that more abundantly. I was thinking of the things you find in the Old Testament as well as the new that speak concerning the things that last and things that perish with the using and all. And as I was doing that, I remembered the song Mr. Businessman. And there are some of the words of that song. In the song, the singer sings, spending counterfeit incentives, wasting precious time and health, placing value on the worthless, disregarding priceless wealth. He goes on to say, did you see your children going up today? Did you hear the music of their laughter as they said about the play? Did you catch the fragrance of those roses in your garden? Did the morning sunlight warm your soul, brighten up your day? Do you qualify to be alive, whereas the limit of your senses so as only to survive? That's a sentiment that songs have been written about. Did you enjoy the garden? You planted roses. Did you smell them? No. You just want all the outside appearances. You have the children. Did you play with them? No. Do you spend time with them? No. Why? Because you're so busy on the job making the money. And that was the song Mr. Businessman. That's what they were saying. But that wasn't invented by Ray Stevens back in the 70s. That's something Jesus himself said. That's something you find in the Old Testament. What has value? What matters? My life does not consist in the abundance of the things that I possess. I can't, I can't buy the things that matter. Like the prophets sang the Beatles when they said, can't buy me love. Well, that's true. We know that, don't we? But a lot of people really don't. They really don't. They, they pursue things that do not strengthen their soul. They go after things that don't quench their eternal thirst. So he says he who gets wisdom, he who pursues, he who sacrifices for wisdom loves his own soul. He who keeps understanding, he who observes, he who practices these things. He finds good. You see, in Christ we have an abundance of riches. In Christ we have all that we need. Ephesians 2 verses 4 through 7, Paul said it like this. He said, but God who is rich in mercy, because of his great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ, by grace you've been saved, and raised us up together and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus. That in the ages to come, he might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness towards us in Christ Jesus. Again remember in Proverbs 835, how wisdom says, whoever finds me finds life and obtains favor from the Lord that, is why the pursuit of wisdom ought to be our chief aim. To say, God, I want to have practical understanding of how to live life to its fullest. And I want my soul to be blessed with abundance in you. And we really need to understand that. You see, there are many today who are seeking only after pleasure. This last weekend we had, we had our couple's retreat and it was Saturday and we had made reservations at a restaurant and I forgot it was Cinco de Mayo. Actually, here we go, I'll say something to you. Let's see how you react to this one. I was sharing teasing with the church on Sunday. I said, we went yesterday to a restaurant. I said, and I forgot it was Cinco de Mayo. I said, and I said, but do you realize that in Mexico, Cinco de Mayo is not a big, is not a big thing. It isn't. Most of you know that, perhaps some of you don't. It's not a big thing. It's big here in the United States. I said, so you go to a restaurant, Mexican restaurant, which is where we happen to be. And it's loud. There were people so loud that you could hardly hear yourself talking and we're in, you know, we're in a restaurant that you ought to be quiet in a restaurant. Those are the old days, I realize it. They were so loud, but these are not Hispanics making all the noise. It's just loud. People, you know, and you hear all the noise and you hear them and they're making so much noise. But it's hollow. It's hollow. Cinco de Mayo is, for Americans, just another excuse to get drunk. That's really what it is, right? I mean, am I talking to myself? No, that's what it is. It's another opportunity to drink. That's all it is. And so you get a lot of people in restaurants and they're all making all those sounds and all and it's loud. But to be honest with you, it's also sad. The Bible says in 1 Timothy 5 verse 6, she who lives in pleasure is dead while she lives. And that's the sound that you hear sometimes of people who are making noise, living in pleasure, but are spiritually dead. And that's what makes our task such a challenge today, to clearly live for something that is greater than a moment of pleasure. And in a day when embracing that moment for the pleasure and squeezing out of that moment every bit of pleasure that you can, there's no eye on eternity. There's no awareness that our life is simply a vapor. We need to be aware of these things. So let us pursue wisdom. Verse 9, a false witness will not go unpunished. He who speaks lies shall perish. Now, this is almost the same as verse 5. And you might have noticed that, except that verse 5 said he who speaks lies will not escape. In verse 9, he who speaks lies shall perish. Combined, it's really given us a picture of final judgment. You will not escape. You will perish. Why? Because you're a liar, because you're not right with God. Verse 10, luxury is not fitting for a fool, much less for a servant to rule over princes. That's interesting. There are guys or people who grew up in ordinary, you know, just ordinary blue-collar families and maybe never were taught anything about social graces at all. They just weren't. They weren't taught, you know, about where you place your silverware next to your dish. I don't know any of that. I'll be honest with you. You know, if we had a fork, that was good. You know, but having a fork and knife and a spoon, too. Are you kidding me? We didn't grow up that way. We had a fork. We actually had a spoon. And we grew up, when we got to a certain age, we graduated to a fork. And that was almost like graduation day. We had this little hat on. You know, I mean it was a big day for us when we actually would be able to use the fork. See, and what we had in my family, I don't know if you used bread in yours, but tortillas. In mine, we had tortillas. So, you just cut up the tortilla. You use that. So, for me, I wasn't raised knowing that a spoon goes here. A fork goes here. This other kind of fork goes there. I don't know any of that stuff. Now Marie does. And I'll tell you, if you ever saw us together in a restaurant, you will see me looking at her saying, which fork do I use for this? And she'll tell me. And so I'll just grab it with my hand. Who cares? See, so I'm uncouth in some ways. I never went to a restaurant and ordered a meal until I was 16 years old. We didn't go to restaurants. We only had a couple or few in Norwalk when I grew up. We didn't go to restaurants. My dad and mom would say, why are we going to pay for food that your mom can make? Why would we do that? So, we didn't go to restaurants. I didn't know how to order. The first time I went and ordered breakfast, I didn't know. My mom, you know what we used to call the egg my mom would make me that I like? Mom, I want an egg with a ball on top. I didn't know that there's a way to describe that. The very first time I went to a restaurant and the waitress walks up and says, how can I serve you? I said, I'd like an egg with a ball on top. I did not. And she looks at me like I'm a fool. And I was, you know, I go, and so I had seen a movie where they asked for eggs over easy. I didn't have a clue what that was. But I said, oh, can I have eggs over easy? And then they bring these runny eggs to me. So that's when I, and I'm 16 years old. I had never ordered anything like that. No idea about silverware. No idea about any of that. And so what if you suddenly made me a multi-millionaire? Then it'd be like dressing a monkey in a tuxedo. Because I don't have coot. I didn't have any of the class social graces and all. That's kind of what he's speaking about. Not quite like I just said, but that's kind of what he's saying. He's saying a fool is not normally gracious, but is in, but is low class and lacks social graces. Luxury is not fitting for a fool. He's saying they don't know how to handle it. When they have money, they still have no manners. And then he goes on and he speaks concerning a servant. He said, much less for a servant to rule over princes. So when he speaks of a servant ruling over a prince, he's saying a servant, given a chance to rule, will be arrogant and cruel. The word servant there is more than likely referring to an emancipated slave who mistreats those who once were above them. And so he's saying this is just not something that works right. It doesn't go well. Verse 11, the discretion of a man makes him slow to anger. His glory is to overlook a transgression. Disgression speaks of prudence or good sense. He's saying wisdom should grant us patience. Listen, a wise person has the ability of ignoring insults because they're not overly sensitive. If there's any thing that we need to learn, it's to be quick to hear and slow to speak. There's a lot of sensitivity and oversensitivity in our society today. People get angry at the slightest slightest sense of disrespect. They do, they get angry. I was talking to someone just this weekend who told me they had gone to a football game and as they were walking into a crowd to go to the, they were on their way to the bathroom, they accidentally bumped into somebody and the person that they bumped into wanted to start a fight and began to get angry and saying, you disrespected me and they were drunken. And that happens a lot. That happens a lot. It happens often today unfortunately. So there's a wisdom in being slow to anger. You don't have, you don't have to blow your top. You don't have to defend yourself. You don't have to be somebody who has to, you know, ask the Lord to give to you a kindness and ask the Lord to give you the ability to hear before you speak and ask the Lord to give you a wisdom when to speak and if you do speak how to speak and sometimes it's better just to let somebody say things than to try and argue with them. One of the most foolish arguments you'll ever get into is with somebody who's drunk. Have you ever done that? Try and win an argument with a drunk. You can't. And so why do we have to get angry? And so he says it's actually wisdom. It's good sense and good sense should give us patience and we shouldn't be overly sensitive. A wise person denies the enemy, the pleasure of seeing them get angry. That's because they refuse to be controlled by other people and they're not controlled by their own passions. You know and that's true. When I start getting mad at somebody, I've given them permission to control my life. That's what I've done. I've given them permission to determine how I respond and if I get angry I gave them control over me. So I'm not supposed to give myself over to somebody else's control. I'm supposed to give myself over to the Spirit's control. Is it easy? No. That's why Jesus spoke of dying to self because our natural response will always be to want to get even or to say something back. So it's really discretion if we cause us if we keep ourselves from getting angry. Verse 12, The king's wrath is like the roaring of a lion but his favor is like dew on the grass. King's wrath, you know, especially during that day, kings could be very frightening with their anger or they could be benevolent. It just depends and so what's the thought of this? Well, use tact when approaching the powerful. Proverbs 16, 14, we saw that as messengers of death is the king's wrath, a wise man will appease it. So be careful how you respond to those in power. Verse 13, a foolish son is the ruin of his father, the contention of a wife, a continual dripping, let's just ignore that, shall we? Two things make a man very unhappy. A foolish son and an annoying wife. He already said something in Proverbs 17, 21, to have a fool for a child brings grief. There is no joy for the parent of a godless fool. It's interesting how he says the ruin of the father, the foolish son is the ruin of the father, and the contensions of a wife are like a continual dripping. When you think about the houses at that time, they had the roofs that had posts and then they would have a type of plaster covering and sometimes there would be a hole and so when it rained it would pull up and then the rain would drip through the ceiling and it could, well one, it would make a sound. How many of us who own homes, you hear the dripping faucet? It's amazing in my office here at the church, I was having a meeting with Dave Bustamante and as we're having the meeting his ears perked up for a moment and he went into the, I have a bathroom there in my office and there's water that's dripping. You could hear the dripping and he heard it and it can be annoying when you're talking and you just hear drip, drip, that can be very annoying and so one of the things he's saying is that it can be a wife who's constantly on your back is dripping and not only does that annoy but it also destroys because if you have water that keeps dropping on the same spot even hardened rock will eventually wear away and so he's speaking concerning the things that happen with that it's really destructive because the dripping can wear away even stone so when combined foolishness and strife will destroy a home. A foolish son and strife in the marriage can destroy a home. Now how can we have a good home? Well once again we need to be committed to the things of the Lord. We need to be aware that Christ comes first. When Marie and I my wife and I were dating we both agreed that the first person in our life the one we love the most should never be that other person. I should never love Marie and she should never love me more than we love the Lord and so when you build a marriage when you build a relationship if you're a Christian you build it on Jesus. He is your sure foundation. Everything in your life revolves around him and so he comes first and not only does he come first but you serve him. So he comes first and you serve him and I was sharing with our married couples that that when it's kept Marie and me solid and growing as that we have first love the Lord we love each other but we serve God together and so loving him and serving God one independently and two together has produced an environment in a home that encourages the children God bless us with to have a relationship with Christ. These are the things that have gone into the foundations of our relationship. Everything is built on Jesus. We serve the Lord and God says in the book of Malachi in chapter 2 that his desire in marriage was so you would have godly offspring and so because marriage a husband and a wife represents Christ in his church Jesus the husband the church the bride and because Jesus is never going to be severed from us we're not divorced from him we're always together we need to build on the sure foundation of the Lord Jesus Christ serving together raising our children together so that the legacy of Christ continues through generations so that when I go home to be with Jesus Marie goes home to be with Jesus should the Lord tarry that my children can carry on the relationship with God that we gave to them and they can give that relationship to their children and godliness can continue as a legacy in our home because it really doesn't matter to me if my child is a corporate president or if he sells cars or whatever that doesn't matter to me as long as he loves Christ and loves his family it all begins there and that's how it works you know and and that's what we need to understand so we need to understand that the Lord would have us to have relationships in that way so a foolish son is the ruin of his father the contingents of a wife are a continual dripping but houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers a prudent wife is from the Lord so when the marriage is turning out good the glory goes to God as a husband we are to lead our wives but my wife follows the Lord and he is the one who blesses her and i need to remember what james said in chapter 1 verse 17 when he said every good gift every perfect gift is from above comes down from the father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning verse 15 laziness cast one into a deep sleep an idle person will suffer hunger if you're lazy you're not going to prosper in life by sleeping instead of working you end up with nothing for yourself or your family Proverbs 20 verse 13 says do not love sleep lest you come to poverty open your eyes and you will be satisfied with bread verse 16 he who keeps the commandment keeps his soul but he who is careless of his ways will die obedience to the commands of the Lord is the path of life so learn to obey the Lord's word how do we do that well we here we are right now studying it but we require it requires reading and meditating on the word individually and as we see the the word of the Lord and we learn the things that please him we obey him in John 15 verses 10 and 11 Jesus said if you keep my commandments you will abide in my love just as I have kept my father's commandments and abide in his love these things I have spoken to you that my joy may remain in you and that your joy may be full verse 17 he who has pity on the poor lends to the Lord and he will pay back what he has given God repays acts of kindness to the poor because you actually see them and the acts of kindness as actually being done unto him and in return he gives the generous soul life and blessings verse 18 chasing your son while there's hope do not set your heart on his destruction if you refrain from disciplining your child they will be dull and ignorant of the ways of the Lord there's no doubt about that listen you don't really know those of you who are parents there are times when you're raising your kid that you wonder whose kid is this really how to get this the monsters you know what happened God what did I do wrong you know they can be monsters that's true and and you look at them and you wonder where am I failing what am I doing wrong and then the kid somewhere wakes up it may take years it may take years did I say it may take years sometimes it takes a while but if you train up a child and the way you should go when he is old you will not depart from it you hold on hold on you hold on you hold on and you say Lord we have done the best that we can we have poured into them all that we know we've covered them in prayer from the day we discovered that that we were pregnant when Marie would tell me she's with child and she said that quite often in the first six years of our marriage she said that five times we actually have five children one is in heaven we had a miscarriage so I know that one day I'm going to meet my child that I never met here and so Marie would say she's with child and and we prayed we dedicated the babies to Christ before they were born yeah you remember this on baby we I would lay my hands on her her belly and I would pray for the baby Father in Jesus name this baby is yours this baby is yours and then the baby is born and they come out screaming and then they never stop but they come out and they're so full of life and and you love them and and and when they're small they're they're fairly easy to handle there's a point in their life that they begin to become independent they make up their own mind about things you're blessed by many of the decisions you're broken by some of them and and and sometimes you may see that you wonder are they followers of Christ and then and then as they're growing older you you see that they are they were working their own salvation out they were learning to follow Christ they were learning his ways and and and he was working in them in a way that was different than how he worked in you but he was working and then then in in our cases our kids grew up they have the babies and and then you watch them you watch your your kid as they they pray with their child you watch your kid as they dedicate the baby you watch them as they as they go through the the various things and then you get to watch your prayers answered especially the one that you said Lord please give them a child as bad as they've been to me thank you Lord you did it may they learn suffering but you know it's all a matter of chastening your child while there's hope just keep pouring into them and don't give up don't give up Proverbs 29 15 the rod and rebuke give wisdom but a child left to himself bring shame to his mother verse 19 a man of great wrath will suffer punishment for if you rescue him he'll have to do it again this is a picture of someone getting into trouble and going to court and being fined and he's saying hot tempered people end up paying for their temper Galatians 6 verse 5 says every man shall bear his own burden so if you pay his fine the first time you will continue to do so he's saying again and again verse 20 listen to council receive instruction that you may be wise in your latter days if you resist instruction when you're young you're going to grow old and still lack wisdom there was an old saying there's no fool like an old fool and there's some truth to that so if you resist instruction while young you grow up and still never grow up you still lack wisdom so maturity is the result of a lifetime of disciplined learning verse 21 there are many plans in a man's heart nevertheless the Lord's council that will stand in other words only the plans approved by the Lord are blessed by the Lord so seek his will in your planning seek his will as you plan make sure that you prayerfully ask God to direct you ask God to move you in the right direction and you need to remember that you may have a plan but it's the Lord who brings that plan to fruition so seek the Lord when you're making your plans verse 22 what is desired in a man is kindness and a poor man is better than a liar kindness I'll say something very very quickly about that because this is this term here what is desired in a man is kindness I'll say this when I was 19 before I got saved just before I got saved I was speaking to a friend and I was again I wasn't saved and I said one of the things that I want to become is kind because I wasn't because I was abrupt in my speech I was just not a nice person and and to me kindness was a weakness it was like a kind person seemed to be they just weren't aggressive for the things that mattered and I I saw the a man who was kind as as really I saw him as effeminate I thought this is this guy's gotten a backbone you know why why you know you got to stand up because that's how I thought I I never realized that kindness is is a virtue I never saw it as being a a fruit of the spirit it's mercy it's goodness in action and kindness is is desired and that's what it says what is desired in a man is kindness now I can say as a husband I could say my wife appreciates that when I'm kind I can say as a father my children have always appreciated me being kind to them as a friend I could say that my friends like kindness a gentle spirit this is a beautiful virtue but it's something that sometimes we just don't value so what is desired in a man is kindness and he goes on to say a poor man is better than a liar a loving poor man is better than an unfaithful man who has no love verse 23 the fear of the lord leads to life he who has it will abide in satisfaction he will not be visited with evil when you live for the lord even when calamity strikes you can have peace the fear of the lord leads to life and satisfaction verse 24 this is kind of a humorous picture a lazy man buries his hand in the bowl and will not so much as bring it to his mouth again he just kind of lays they're going oh I just can't do this he's lazy he's saying some people are too lazy to eat but the picture is starting a project and not finishing it verse 25 strike a scoffer and the simple will become wary rebuke one who has understanding and he will discern knowledge when he says strike a scoffer a scoffer is a person hardened in sin and they may be punished but that doesn't mean they're going to change so though he doesn't change there may be someone watching and as they watch and see what happened to him just by watching that they're saying I'm not going to do that because I don't want to have happened to me what happened to them on the other hand he says in verse 25 rebuke one who has understanding and he will discern knowledge so just speak to some people and they will listen and they will learn raising kids once again one of my kids went if they did something wrong you know I could spank them and they had this attitude is that the best you got no but I don't want to be overly angry then I have the other one and all I need to do is say don't do that that that's not something you should do okay now they may have watched as I smoked the scoffer I don't know and learned but not everybody learns in the same way and some people they just they just need to see what happened and learn the lesson others will listen to advice or correction and then there are others that no matter how you deal with them they're going to stay the same way verse 26 he who mistreats his father and chases away his mother is a son who causes shame and brings reproach who mistreats the word mistreat means to assault the one who abuses his parents he's saying is a disgrace I had a cousin when I grew up I don't even remember his name all I remember about him is his disrespect for his mom I still remember that we were at the house and he he spoke in a way to his mother that I couldn't believe and I remember as he did that I remember speaking to my own mom and dad and I said I and I was just a kid I was like six seven years old then he was going off on his mom he was in his teens and I saw this early on I thought this is terrible you should never speak like that and I'm not talking about how kids sometimes can be a little flippant no this guy was abusive with what he was saying he was raising his voice and yelling at his mom and and there are there are people who do that and so he's speaking about somebody who mistreats in this way who's devastating assaulting, abusing and he says this is absolutely a horrible thing this is a horrible thing this is a son who causes shame and brings reproach we should speak with with respect to our parents obviously verse 27 cease listening to instruction my son and you will stray from the words of knowledge you never get too old to learn continue growing in the essentials that you've learned keep adding to them don't veer from them studiously avoid whatever leads you away from the ways of the Lord so don't stop learning don't stop listening verse 28 a disreputable witness scorns justice the mouth of the wicked devours iniquity false witnesses are evil and they simply mock justice and then finally judgments are prepared for scoffers and beatings for the backs of fools fools will be punished either by men or ultimately by God but they will be punished and though they may mock at the warning of judgment judgment will come upon them Jesus in Revelation 22 12 said it like this he said behold I'm coming quickly my reward is with me to render to every man according to what he has done and so beatings are for the backs of fools ultimately people will reap what they have sown judgment is coming and according to Matthew 16 27 the son of man will repay every man according to his deeds so be aware of that because ultimately judgments are prepared for scoffers