 Hey guys, what's up? It's Kinsey and ooh, okay Someone I just walked in my house in today's video I'm gonna be talking about not feeling like you're doing enough not feeling good enough Comparing yourself just being I think just like extra critical and hard on yourself I feel like we are all human and we can all relate to this to some extent Especially in the times that we're in so I wanted to just do a video kind of talking about it like a little bit about my experience and Kind of how I've been coping with it because I've definitely been dealing with this a little bit worse probably in the past like month or so There are times when I don't compare myself at all. I don't care Um, I feel good about everything and then there are times when I'm like I'm doing nothing in life And like everything I do sucks and like nothing matters. So with that being said I have really done some Self-reflection. I know we're probably shocked and I've realized like what it is and kind of what shifts within me when I start to compare and start to just kind of like Overthink and kind of go like crazy, you know, that's like what it feels like. I'm here. I'm Kinsey. Nice to meet you I would love if you would subscribe and stick around I do a lot of lifestyle videos vlogs all that stuff But I'm gonna be answering some questions slash just reading some notes that I've kind of been taking over the past You know month or so it's gonna be a little bit of a rambly video, but I hope you guys enjoy I love you guys so much and let's get started Honestly, I think that comparing yourselves and going through the emotions of not feeling good enough and not feeling like you're doing enough And all of that stuff is kind of part of just like being a human being I don't think that anyone can fully escape these feelings. It doesn't matter who they are I think we all deal with it and So what it really comes down to is like what are your metrics, right? So if you find your worth completely in what you're doing in your job Then obviously you're going to run into a lot of problems. We're not really gonna go into this I've talked about this so many times, but when I was younger, I definitely found my worth more so my worth ethic so I would kind of just Way overdo it and I was always Exhausted kind of a hamster on the hamster ball You know like you're not really going anywhere, but you're like dying Um, and I feel like I've really worked to kind of take my worth back and find it in something else Like me I find my identity and who I am and like my faith But whatever you believe I think it's just really important to not put your worth in something that is so changing and Has so many different circumstances and just like you what movie is it that says your job is never gonna love you back I watched this recently. I just think that that's really important Don't get me wrong. I'm so passionate about everything I do and I love working It's like my favorite thing to do But it cannot be like your entire life and if you are measuring like your worth And who you are as a person by your accomplishments like you're never gonna be happy because you can always do more and there Will always be someone who is doing more also Instagram is a highlight reel So like you'd never know what people are going through I think even for myself like in some of the hardest times of my life Like you see my Instagram and it seems fine, but that's because sorry That's because I'm not gonna like post crying over like a family death or something like that Which I honestly think is totally fine I think it's important to point out often that like this is just a highlight reel But I also don't think that you owe your followers on Instagram like photos of you sobbing over something That's like really dear to your heart like you can't keep some things to yourself but without being sad I do think it is important to find your worth in Something else something like bigger than yourself or even if it's yourself just something else I find it in my faith and that's definitely really helped me But yeah, then you go to like what are my metrics? So what are you measuring a worth and again what we just kind of talked about? It's like a lot of the time people find their worth in other relationships or careers or Money or influence or whatever successes to them essentially And I think you just have to keep your metrics at a very healthy thing like for instance I was getting really hard at myself recently because I was like okay Like I've been on each of forever like my channels not growing my channels and growing like years and blah blah blah Whatever and like that stuff very very rarely gets to me But sometimes it will get to me like I'm a human being I just remember being like oh my gosh Like this is so not me and these are not my metrics at all like that's not what I care about Like I'm care about actually like making an impact in someone's life and whatever and that's not to say like when you're really big You can't do that obviously you can't but my metrics are not like hitting a million subscribers You know what I mean and like well that would be great, and that's cool Um it matters more to me that I'm like making an impact on someone's life in like a positive way I think just to make your metrics like healthy metrics and then constantly kind of reassess in your head Also something I always just say to myself is like staying your lane run your own race It's so crazy, especially just some like the quote-unquote like success of this world that everyone is so focused on including myself Things change so much like people can go viral people can like lose their job overnight people can get a promotion People can meet someone and that's like their ticket to Hollywood like whatever that is things are always constantly changing I've seen it happen so many times where it's someone who was like really really small and Let's okay. Let's just keep it in like social media terms just because it's easier for me to talk about but so interesting And I've seen this so many times when there's someone with like millions of followers that doesn't pay attention to this person with a smaller following Probably because they have a smaller following unfortunately, and then the person with a smaller following ends up blowing up and the other person Their channel kind of dies out and like now you know what I'm saying like everything is always changing I thought like you really just have to be focused on your own race and staying in your own lane I think a lot of people especially in this generation are actually like pioneers or pioneering a new way so you Can't really like look to your left and right to compare yourself because you guys are actually all doing completely different things even if You are posting the same kind of content on YouTube or you are in like the same industry or whatever that is You're at the same school like ultimately you are you and they are them and they're told you guys are totally two different people and You have your own races to run like you can't compare your race because no one else has your race You know what I mean? It's just designed completely for you So I think staying in your lane is really important run your own race like keep your head down focus on what you're doing And don't get caught up in whatever one else is doing a lot of people are asking about Comparison and just perfectionism and I I think it's really important to just add like you are your own person And that's why it works Keaton said this so well recently in her podcast and she was like, you know, Kenzie and I make similar videos a Lot of similar videos, but like Keaton is Keaton and I'm me You know like we are two different people at the end of the day And there's gonna be different people that collaborate with her and the different people to collaborate with me And there's just different opportunities because we're two different people It's really important do not wait until things are perfect things are actually never perfect Perfectionism is like this weird kind of like trap that just kind of holds you back I think literally come like your destiny at the end of the day because you don't Act on anything because you're waiting for things to be absolutely perfect I am a big fan of like launch now or just later It's getting confidential always talks about that, but I definitely think that's really great Like specifically under guys starting a YouTube channel people are like, oh, I don't know I don't know and like the hardest part really is starting the hardest part really is starting and it's making your first video So I think it's just really important to like jump into things. No one's perfect I also think like no one actually wants something to be absolutely perfect because if you it's perfect It's unattainable so people don't connect and they don't relate to that I think it's important like just go ahead and take a step essentially is what I'm saying. Also I wish I could remember where this came from and what book I read this in but I think so often like God just needs us to take a step in order for him to do what he's doing It's like we're praying and praying and praying he's like, okay Like I've clearly outlined this like just take a step and I'll meet you there Not that God ever leaves us, but he's just waiting for us to take a step I think it's like incredibly important to just kind of step out in faith And whatever you believe or however you live your life like just trust that things are gonna work out So I was asking me how do you feel about instant stars like James Charles or Emma Chamberlain and Comparing success and all that stuff. Okay. I think it's important to point out that like Quote-unquote instant stars are like literally like 1% of the population if that that's actually probably do hide so rare that people blow up at that speed and Honestly when it comes to like other people's success and when I'm like comparing whatever I'm never wanting someone else to not succeed Like that's not what it is. I always cheer other people on I always want other people to succeed Like there's enough success to go around for everyone like it's not this innate thing where there's only this amount and we have to cut it this way and it's like Oh, sorry, there's no not for you like that's just not how it works There's seven billion people on this planet So I'm like incredibly happy for them and I love there I love am I think she's like the cutest person ever There's just enough room for everyone at the end of the day like just because someone else is doing really well It doesn't mean that you can't do well or that you shouldn't be happy for them Or I think it's also really ugly to like be like that what I will say that I do sometimes as I see not things like that specifically because they just do totally different things that I do but I Will compare myself to others in a way that I just put more pressure on myself So I'm happy for them and I'm like that is so freakin cool Like I'm so happy for you, but then I'll go back and just put a lot of pressure on myself and be like Oh, I have to be there so for a bit I think I didn't really compare because I didn't want I didn't like wish bad upon anyone But instead I would just place a lot of pressure on myself and that's when I'm like, okay Run your own race stay in your own lane like your life is your own your walk is your own And your journey is gonna be different than everyone else's the main Realization I've made in the recent weeks just in regards to comparing myself not feeling good enough not feeling like I'm doing enough things to cope it of Is that I only ever feel this way if I'm already not in the best place If I'm not already like mentally and physically taking care of myself So I have to be in a more vulnerable place for this to even affect me in the first place when I'm a really happy Healthy individual when I'm in my routines, and I'm doing things that make me me and just feeling good about life and myself Like I'm not gonna really waste my time like comparing and putting more pressure on myself Because I'm in a healthy place, but when I'm not like, you know doing my like daily devotions and working out and Talking to friends and like spending time with people that I love and doing things that kind of refuel me Then I'm in a more vulnerable place where I will Really get on my head and like kind of just spiral out of control. There's a really good book by Jenny Allen Call me out of your head. I will link it down below I really really recommend it if you deal with like any toxic spiraling thought it is life-changing Let's say you're already in a bad place I made a list of things that helped me and things that I do I actually did this last weekend to just kind of get myself like right and get myself back to just being me The first thing a social media break is really really great. Just delete the apps off of your phone. You won't miss it It's actually so relaxing you feel just like so calm and zen and it's a great thing to do I definitely recommend it and I actually will regularly just put a social media break into my routine But I hadn't really done that in 2020 and then I got so in my head And I was so like negative or whatever and I realized it's because I have not taken any breaks from social media all year And last year I would do it just periodically like not even when I felt like I needed it Like I wasn't even on E at that point So I kept myself healthy this year I waited until I was on like whatever below E would be and then I did it So I definitely want to just kind of make it a practice more in my life where I just regularly do it So I don't have to wait until I feel like I desperately need it and I'm like cleaning on for like air You know what I mean another thing get outside. I'm going on walks like literally anything even going on drives There's something about getting outside if you live somewhere where it's like beautiful outside go outside as much as possible There's something about being outside that just makes you feel so much better except for when it's a hundred and five degrees Clear head for me that really goes with just like going on a walk I'll listen even on a sale listen to a podcast or something and it gets me out of my own head And I'm like, okay there are like bigger things in this world than like Me being upset about this for no reason when I'm already like so grateful for my life The next thing would be actually like a gratitude list Which like I know for some people can sound cheesy or whatever But gratitude lists are actually really incredible because you have to sit down and actually write out things you're grateful for and it's really hard to Knock it put in at least a little bit better of a mood when you're writing a gratitude list like it always makes me feel better Regularly just starting off your day with gratitude list is also really good. I'm not the best about that I actually need to do that and be better about that, but that definitely helps me a lot. Okay get a hobby That kind of sounds harsh. I don't mean like that But for me Cooking and reading have definitely become like really big hobbies in mind in 2020 I do them all the time they make me so happy and I'm just a refresh and refueled I think make your own goals and make your own metrics That is really really important and then define your words outside of your doing that is pretty much it for my like comparison video And I also just want to say I don't know what it is about this like generation I actually guess I do it social media But you I put so much pressure on myself to do something by a certain age and like I don't even know why because when you Really think about it. It's actually dumb But you see these like 16 year olds like buying like Lamborghini's or whatever and not that I never care about buying Lamborghini, but you know what I'm saying on Instagram and you're like, oh my gosh I've done nothing with my life when that is not true. That is not the case and that's also not the norm I'm gonna have like longevity in my career in my life And I want to be doing things that I love and I'm excited about 42 look I don't want to accomplish everything right this second So I think enjoying the journey is really important There's gonna be times when you look there will be a time when you look back at this and you're like I'm so glad that this didn't happen then or this didn't happen now and I totally see that now There are so many people who didn't even realize what they wanted to do until they were like 35 years old so I think it's just really important to focus on yourself and focus on who you are becoming over like what you are doing and Just put yourself in a really healthy Mindset and have a healthy relationship with yourself So that you're in a better place in order to kind of fight against comparison or fight against Insecurities or feeling like you're not doing enough and like you're not enough. I really do think You at least have like a really big advantage when you're in a healthier space Then when you kind of just let yourself go and you just pay everything and you're just in a bad kind of mindset So that's kind of what I have learned Just recently and just things I'm trying to implement a little bit more To make sure that I'm not just waiting until I'm on E to like do all these things in a weekend and try to like revive myself I want to just do them like routinely and keep it up so that I'm in a healthy place so that I'm not putting unnecessary Unneeded pressure on myself and just being harder on myself that I already am but I love you guys This is a human thing. Unfortunately. I really don't love it, but I love you guys I hope you guys enjoyed today's video. Let me know if you guys liked it And I'll see you guys soon. Bye