 Ready? All people and people at the station is feeling bored with it. Well I'm out of focus, that's wonderful. Yay, in focus. So this video is bought you by me, Pi. Hello, I'm Lydia, what up? This is a cool angle. We should film the entire video like that. We really shouldn't. I posted a poll. I'm currently doing a live stream that's been going on for over three hours, be proud of me. Three hours of a live stream, that's like impressive as fuck. But this video is something people have wanted me to make for so long. I know Beth has especially wanted me to make this. Here we are. I'm becoming tan emojo. It's fine. Disclaimer, I didn't get fucked over too far. So this video is, I just think I'm hot drinking a lot. Um, a lot. So this story time takes place. In precedent, I haven't used what I'm doing. Hi guys, I'm Lydia, welcome back to my channel. If you're new here, hit the subscribe button. Don't know why this, don't think this video is gonna make me want to turn the notification bell on, but turn it on because I use the community tab when I go live every single Monday. Next Monday I'm gonna be doing a 24 hour live stream. He'll make these. This video is about the craziest night out that I went on, and I should say this. I used to drink a lot, a lot. I used to go out three times a week. I literally need to rank myself to death from God knows how many times in this phase of this year. I stopped drinking back in March. So probably months of that. April, May, June, July, August, September, October. Eight months with no alcohol, that's... So I've got a lot of footage from nights out. Either I was high or I was drunk. None was good. I would never want... I'm gonna go drinking again, like don't get me wrong, but I will happily drink alcohol. Getting high, probably not. Not really into cocaine anymore. My chair's turning around. So this story takes place about a year ago. Don't drink when you're suicide at all. It's not a good thing to eat from it. I tried to drink myself to death, but it nearly succeeded. So the craziest night out I went on would probably be my first night out to be that. My first night out I went and I got banned from a nightclub shop. I mean, why wouldn't I get banned? I think even the best thing is I don't even know what I did to get banned, so I can't even tell the story. I don't know what I did to get banned from a nightclub, so yeah. This story is from this year. One, I was into cocaine. Alcohol. Three, collapsed in the middle of a street, and all my friends left me. I had great friends, you know. Real, real support. I used to... I loved nights out. I used to love drinking, like pre-drinks. A bottle of vodka, yes please. A bottle of rum, yes please. WKD, or why not? It's busy bar. You know, I'd drink anything. It got to a point where I got like, imagine this is like, yeah, the small bottles of vodka. A lot of tiny ones, but like the smallish ones. I'd get it and I would literally like, put it in my bra and go in. To the point now, I used to, I remember walking down a street, just neck in this bottle of vodka. This is the best demonstration of drinking vodka ever. I wish I hadn't had an actual bottle of vodka. I don't. I do. I don't. I'd just broken up with my current partner and I was getting into a relationship with Michelle. You guys know who Michelle is. I don't want to talk about her or even the knowledge of her existence. That was all going on at this time and when I went out, I'd had so much stress because of it all that I, I didn't even know how much vodka I drank. I couldn't tell you. I drank a lot. I got into a club. I went and asked people I knew that were dealers. I'd just walk home and have some Coke and they'd give it to me and that was the one night and the only night I'd ever done MDMA and it made my mood work. MDMA, also known as Moly, is a type of drug that accelerates your mood. So if you're feeling crap, it's going to make you feel worse. I was suicidal. I wasn't happy. I was in an emotional situation and it wasn't good. I don't even like admit and I did that. I like, I made friends with a lot of people that wasn't exactly the best for me. Um, was very into drugs. I made friends with his first dealer and then I made friends with that person's friends who knew other dealers and then I made friends with other people who had their own dealers and eventually my phone just became full of dealer numbers and if I wanted something, I can just vote and be like, hey, can I have something I can't afford to pay you? Can I just have a little bit? And they always said yes. I never had no said to me. And the issue with that is drug dealers don't give a fuck. Why would they? They weren't wanting. Let's get on to the alcohol part. So I had already drank a lot before getting into this club. I'd already collapsed before getting to the club. Like perhaps outside the security, like you drunk. I was like, no, no, I'm fine. He's like, Lydia, I know you, of course you're drunk. I'm like, yeah, I am whatever. Got let in because I need the bouncers and that was the only good thing about going out and pressing them, I knew the bouncers. So I got into the club and I couldn't tell you what I drank. I just know I, I entered it with a lot of people on Facebook. I don't know. Like the thing is for me, all nights out is I am very good at manipulating myself to get free alcohol and free anything. Like I can pretty much get what, if I go on a night out, I can get what I want and it's not a good thing. Trust me, it's not. So getting on to the alcohol. I feel like I've been rambling a lot and not really getting to the point. So the alcohol. I drank a lot. I did get thrown out of the nightclub as well. And bearing in mind, I know the bouncers. I know the bar staff. I got thrown out and I know my friends left with me because I have a photo of us outside the club of them holding me up. I'm not going to put that in because I'm not an asshole. The next thing that I knew, I was an A&E with police officers around me and like properly came around. They explained to me what happened. There was like, you was left in the street on your own. We had someone come up to us saying they thought you was dead. Apparently when the paramedics turned up, they had to put tubes down on me and the whole shabam, like whatever. It was mad. Like it was intense. It was terrifying. I don't know how I didn't get arrested for the coke. These people that were around me were supposed to be my friends. I just wanted to ask this, like who would do that to me as a person? Like you go out with people who you know are like, these people knew what I had going on. They knew I was trying to drink myself to death. They went out with me. They're like, oh we'll keep you lying and make sure you don't do what you shouldn't do. They left with me and then they left me lying in the fucking street. Like anything could have happened. And when I went out, I didn't used to wear anything. I used to wear fucking like little bralette things and skirts and that. Like I didn't give a fuck. I didn't care what I looked like. I didn't give a fuck like what they're gonna do, you know? Because at that point I was like, I don't even care what happens to me. Like why would I care? I didn't want to be alive. What's the worst that's gonna happen? Someone's gonna kill me? Cool, thanks, great. And I remember that day vividly because when I came around the hospital I got up to leave and police officers came after me and then 1-3-6 me because believe it or not I was a risk to myself. And this was before all the hospital admissions this year and if things got that bad then I'm amazed someone had stepped in. It took an extra year around to get help but I'm not talking about the NHS system today. So since that night I haven't drank anything. I'm pretty proud to say that to be honest and I am looking forward to my next night out. I'm probably not gonna go as well as I did before like maybe not the cocaine and the MA. I look back on it and I'm just like what the fuck was I thinking? Like all the people I used to hang out with I've blocked on Facebook like no thank you don't need it in my life. My phone's probably turned on now. So night out wise I've got photos on here that I don't even know who I gave my phone to to take the photos of me. Ha picture with me my excellent dealer. Yeah that's right I went to a bullpitt nightclub. I got banned from there. My message in this video is for you that if you're gonna drink think about it and that's how you're not supposed to drink not my place. If you're considering doing cocaine don't. My overall message for you is to just be careful with whatever you choose to do. I will insert some clips of me absolutely plastered off my face visa laffer because why not? When we get started and we ain't gonna stop. We're gonna turn it out till it gets too hot. Long story short I've been banned from a lot of nightclubs and I have got no intention of repeating that though I am planning on going on some nights out in the future because I'm a lot more stable now and another thing is don't go out clubbing with people that you don't trust because good chances they'll try and fuck you or they'll fuck you over. The issue with a lot of friends I had is they all wanted to sleep with me and that sounds really self-obsessed but literally I've got messages from them all saying hey I want to fuck you or they've tried to cheat on their partners to sleep with me. I'm not even that good looking like why would you want to sleep with me like fucking let's be real here. Go out with people you trust if you're gonna go out. Don't do drugs and be responsible with alcohol. I'm not gonna tell you how to drink, I'm not gonna tell you what to do. If you're new here hit the subscribe button and I'll catch you guys soon with a new video. Bye my book or a book. I'm gonna go and sleep because it's after midnight and I've been streaming for over three hours so yeah peace guys.