 Bring you our Miss Brooks, starring Eve Arden. Although it was a difficult decision to make, our Miss Brooks, who teaches English at Madison High School, finally made it. So after five years of practically going steady with Philip Boynton, last week she finally gave the green light to other men. Yes, last week I gave them the green light, and since then they've acted as though my street is under repairs. However, I did meet a salesman named Freddie Stewart, and when a girl has spent five years being taken to a hot dog stand for dinner, a movie, and then a soda fountain afterward, anything would seem like a change. So Wednesday night I went out with Freddie, and the evening seemed most enjoyable. The hot dogs were delicious. The movie great, and the double malted were out of this world. But of far greater interest than my latest acquaintance was my landlady's new heartthrob. For the past two weeks, Mrs. Davis had been trying to conceal her little romance, and I had been trying to conceal my curiosity. By breakfast time Thursday I could no longer bear the suspense. But before I could ask her about it, Mrs. Davis posed a question of her own. I suppose you've been wondering where I've been spending my evenings in the last few weeks. The question did cross my mind. Well, dear, I've been going with the most wonderful man. Oh, Connie, he's so worldly, so slob, so devineer, so romantic. Who is he, Mrs. Davis? Henry, our butcher. Our butcher? Yes, that's the man who's been dating me, and I have further news for you. Now hold on to your seat, dear. I'm even thinking of marrying him. Well, that's one way of being sure of the choice cut. Mrs. Davis, you're not serious. Oh, but I am, Connie. Henry Pringle seems just right for me in every way. But Mrs. Davis, this seems incredible. Who is he? What do you know about him? Where did you meet him? I met him over the phone about three weeks ago. You met him over the phone? That's right. I was calling in my order to Schmidt's butcher shop the way I generally do, and Henry answered it. But how did you finally meet him in person, Mrs. Davis? Well, four days after that first call, Henry appeared at our house in the afternoon with a large box tied with a wide red ribbon. He brought you some flowers? No, dear, our pot roast for that night. Well, he asked me for a date, and from then on, we started going together steadily. As you know, I've been out almost every other night. And last night, he popped the question. Well, I'm glad you didn't pop the answer. Mrs. Davis, you know I want you to be happy more than anything else in the world, but you've gone with Henry such a short time. After all, what do you really know about him? What has he told you about himself? Well, dear, he's a bachelor, been in town a month, and he's Mr. Schmidt's partner. But do any of your friends know him? And why hasn't he ever come over to the house to meet me? Well, I suggested it, Connie, but Henry is very bashful. However, he was going to meet you up to the time I told him you taught English at Madison High. That's when he bathed out. Now, I won't hold that against him. That's when most men back out. Anyway, dear, you'll meet him tonight. I invited him to dinner, and I told him I'd give him my answer as they. Mrs. Davis, not so soon. Oh, that must be Walter to drive me to school. Be out in a minute, Walter. Look, Mrs. Davis, I have to leave now, but please think this over for at least another week. Wait until you know a little more about Henry. I've already thought it over, Connie. And now that I've made up my mind, I can hardly wait to change my name to Pringle. Oh, well, that's all right, Mrs. Davis. Then you agree with me. Certainly. Change your name to whatever you like. Only don't marry Henry until you know him better. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Gosh, Mrs. Brooks, you haven't said a word since you got in the car. It isn't my driving that's bothering you, is it? No, Walter. I'm worried about something else today. Oh. Well, I wouldn't worry about that, Mrs. Brooks. I mean, what can you expect when last night was the first date you had with him? What? Walter, how did you know I had the date last night? Well, Harriet and I saw you in the balcony of the Bijou last night. Hey, what'd you think of Beat the Devil, Mrs. Brooks? Oh, my date wasn't that bad. Oh, you mean the picture. I thought Humphrey Bogart was fine. But I'm not thinking about myself, Walter. This concerns someone else. Well, you're certainly not worried about Mrs. Davis' romance, are you? And you know about that, too. How did you find out about that? Yeah, I was also up in the balcony with Harriet the night before. You went to the same movie with Harriet two nights in a row? And tonight I'm going back alone and see the picture. But the other night, you saw Mrs. Davis up there with someone, huh? Boy was she with someone, Mrs. Brooks. Ooh, la, la. Walter, I can't say I care for that. Ooh, and even less for those la, la's. Well, I didn't mean any disrespect, Mrs. Brooks, but Mrs. Davis and this old fella certainly did seem to be enjoying each other's company. Honestly, Harriet and I thought we'd pop the way they were popping popcorn into each other's mouth. Cute. Well, that's exactly what's worrying me. She's thinking seriously of popping popcorn into her friend's mouth for the rest of her life. Well, you mean marrying the guy? Oh, but that's wonderful, Mrs. Brooks. Wonderful. Well, certainly. Oh, what could be more romantic than two lonely old people in the autumn of their lives who find the warm glow of companionship and thus walk hand in hand into the setting sun together. Followed by two men from a collection agency and the sheriff. Well, Mrs. Davis has known this man for a little over two weeks. What does she really know about him? About his background, his finances. Oh, but Mrs. Davis is a mature woman, Mrs. Brooks. She ought to know what she's doing. Not in this case. But since we're practically on the school grounds, Walter, we'd better drop the subject for the time being. Oh, sure. I'll say, isn't that Harriet an old marble head? Yeah. And Mr. Cancling out in front of the school? Oh, so it is. I wonder what our principal's doing outside the school. Maybe he figures that gives him more room to pounce on it. I hardly think so. But apparently there's something terribly wrong today. Why, Mrs. Brooks? He's smiling. Yeah. I wonder who he expelled. Well, well, well, it seems we're all arriving about the same time this morning. Good morning, Mrs. Brooks. Good morning, sir. Good morning, Harriet. Good morning, Mr. Brooks. How are you this morning, Denton? Oh, fine, terribly fine. I want to drive to the back lot with me, Harriet. Oh, I'd like to, Walter. But you know how daddy feels about the two of us. Go right ahead, my dear. Now, really, Mr. Conklin, I must protest against the constant injustice of never permitting your daughter to accompany me on so simple a journey. Ah! Did you say, did you say go right ahead? Now, take that souped up flying saucer out of here before I change my mind. Oh, yes, sir. Yes, sir. Hop in, Harry. OK. Oh, thanks, daddy. I don't know what it is, but that boy always leaves me boiling. I can't remember when I've been in such a good humor. I can't either. That is, you certainly did seem in a fine humor this morning, sir. And well, I might be too. We had some very good news at our house last night. It concerns my wife's sister, Mildred. You've heard me mention her, the single one who comes to our house and stays for months for the time. You mean she's finally getting married? No, that's just it. She's not. But how is that good news, sir? Well, we were suspicious of the fellow right from the beginning. From everything Mildred told us about him, he only seemed to be interested in her for her money. He did? So I began to do a little private investigating and found the fellow I'd once been a confident man and had landed in jail twice. Mildred wouldn't believe me, but luckily when I phoned him and confronted him with the evidence, he told me to stop worrying that he'd found a new sucker anyway. Mr. Conklin, hadn't you ever met this man before? No, no, that was one of the things that first aroused my suspicions. He never would come over to the house to meet us. I think I'm beginning to feel a little faint. Then how did you know where to call? That was easy. I knew his name and how Mildred had met him, so I simply called Schmidt Butcher Shop where he worked. Mr. Conklin, will you excuse me for a few moments? Why, what are you going to do, Miss Brooke? First I'm going to make a quick phone call, and then I'm going to become a vegetarian. Well, I'd heard of older people arriving at the age of indiscretion before. However, not only did my landlady arrive, but I think she intends to spend the rest of her life there. When I finally reached her on the phone just before noon, the results of our conversation practically floored me. She refused to believe a word of what Mr. Conklin had said about Henry. Naturally, I had to discuss my problem with someone, so over our lunch table in the cafeteria a little while later, Mr. Boynton was elected. His quick, incisive mind instantly grasped the problem, and his first crystal clear statement went right to the heart of it. Boy, I'd sure hate to be in Mrs. Davis' place. Oh, you'd be too tall for Henry anyway. Yes, it is a mess, isn't it? Particularly since Mrs. Davis is giving Henry her decision to marry him tonight. Well, now let me get this straight, Miss Brooks. You say you called Mrs. Davis and gave her the information Mr. Conklin gave you? Yes, I told her Mr. Conklin said that Henry was a confidence man, had been in jail twice, and had told him he didn't care about Conklin's sister-in-law anymore because he'd found another sucker. And exactly what was Mrs. Davis' reaction? She asked me what else was new. That seems incredible. Was that all she said? Well, not entirely. Oh, I didn't think so. She also said to be sure to pick up a can of vegetable soup on the way home this afternoon. But Miss Brooks, didn't you ask her why she wasn't concerned with what you told her? Of course I did. And Mrs. Davis claimed that Mr. Conklin was spreading the story because he was angry that Henry hadn't married Mildred. Oh, then she knew about the episode. Yes, it seems Henry had already covered himself on that score. He told her that she might hear some wild stories about him because he'd been seeing Mildred. And when he had met Mrs. Davis, he gave her up. Gosh, then what will happen to Mrs. Davis? Will she learn the real truth in time? Listen again tomorrow to another thrilling episode that Margaret faces life. But I'm really worried, Mr. Boyman. There must be some way to bring her to her senses. I wish I could help. Sometimes when I'm faced with a vexing problem, I find a solution by observing how my frogs and rabbits react under similar circumstances. It won't work here. Very few frogs and rabbits consider marrying confidence men. Well, that isn't quite what I'm... Oh, there are only some way to convince her that people don't marry so hastily, at least until they've looked into the other person's background. If anyone else were doing the same thing, I know Mrs. Davis would condemn it. Miss Brooks, wait. I think you've got something. Well, after all these years, it's about time you've... Oh, you mean I've given you an idea. Oh. I'll say you did. Now tell me, how was your new date last night? Next time I have a secret, I'll hire a sky rider. Freddie Stewart is a very nice chap, Mr. Boyman. Very nice. Well, I'm glad you like him, Miss Brooks, because that's part of my idea. And what is your idea, Mr. Boyman? That you contemplate marrying him. What? Five years, I'm going with the same man. And when he finally does propose, it's that I marry somebody else. No, you don't understand. I don't mean actually contemplate marrying him. I mean, just give Mrs. Davis the impression you're going to marry him after only one date. Don't you get it, Miss Brooks? Yes, but I'm not sure I want it. I feel certain it'll work. When Mrs. Davis thinks that someone she cares about is doing something hastily, she may reconsider her own position. Then you can suggest she test out Henry tonight. Well, since we haven't any time to lose, it's at least worth a try. Of course it is. All right, then. Right after school, I'll dash down to the 5 and 10 cent store. 5 and 10 cent store? What for? If I'm thinking of getting married, the least thing I'm entitled to is an engagement ring. Oh, my God. Andre? No, it's me, Mrs. Davis. I know. Come in, Mrs. Davis. My, oh, my, early this afternoon, dear. But why are you packing? I'm not really packing, Mrs. Davis. Just throwing a few things into my valise. I'll be back in a few days. But, Connie, why didn't you tell me you were taking a trip? Well, this one came up suddenly, and it seemed so insignificant that it was hardly worth mentioning. Why not, Connie? I'm getting married. Well, Connie, even an insignificant trip like that is worth telling me about since. You're getting married. When did you decide to do that? About an hour ago, during a lull in the conversation. We're getting married this evening. Well, I think it's simply wonderful, dear. Huh? Of course, it's what we've both dreamed about all these years that someday Mr. Boynton would propose. Oh, I'm not marrying Mr. Boynton. It's Freddie Stewart. Freddie Stewart? Freddie Stewart asked you to marry him, and you accepted? Certainly. I didn't have anything else planned for this weekend, did I? He asked you an hour ago, and you're getting married tonight? Yes, Freddie said he doesn't believe in long engagements. But, Connie, marriage is the most important step of your life. You'll have a whole lifetime to live together. It takes months to get to know a man properly. Oh, now, Mrs. Davis, I will admit, if you hadn't gotten the idea first, I might not have accepted so readily. Well, Connie, maybe I was wrong. Maybe we're both being a little hasty. I tell you what, dear, if you tell Freddie you want a little time to reconsider, I'll put Henry to the acid test tonight. The acid test? I didn't mean for you to disfigure him for life. No, what I meant was this. Since you think he's chasing me because I own this house and have a little money, I'll prove to you that you're wrong. How? Well, we'll simply reverse position. You'll be the owner of this house. And what's more, I'll pretend to be your servant. If Henry still wants to marry me then, that should convince us both of his integrity, shouldn't it? Well, Connie, what do you say? What am I paying you good money for, Maggie? Get back in the kitchen and start dinner. Well, Connie, how do I look? Oh, like the perfect maid, Mrs. Davis. You did a swell job on that dress. Do you like this, dear? I just sewed a little lace on an old black dress I found in the attic. But I'm afraid I cut it a little short. My knees haven't felt this drafty since 1926. Oh, this must be Henry now. You better go inside and give me a few minutes alone with him before you announce dinner. All right. You must be Henry Pringle. Yes, my dear, Henry Pringle. And you must be Miss Brooks. I've heard so much about you. Believe me, my dear, there isn't a morning when my little sweetheart phones in a meat order that your name doesn't come out. I know. I go well with Cav's brain. But won't you come in, Mr. Pringle? Just Henry. Well, come in, just Henry. All ready. Thank you, thank you. Margaret's already told me a good deal about the two of you. Yes, we're about ready to enter the sacred state of matrimony. Where is my little girl, Miss Brooks? I've brought her a little something. Oh, how nice, a box of candy. What are they, Carmel? Nuggets or chocolate-covered cream? They're meatballs. How delicious. Chocolate-covered meatballs. Well, everyone brings us Beyonce Candy, Miss Brooks. I've always felt it's more personal to bring one's lady-love delicacies from one's own business. Lucky you're not a bricklayer. Well, it's a pleasure to welcome you here, Henry. I feel as if I almost know you already. And I feel the same way. Margaret's told me so much about you, how you taught school and everything. She told you I taught school? You're not a school teacher? Oh, gracious, no. That's only for people who have to earn a living. Or is the word scratch for a living? My, that Margaret certainly has a vivid imagination. Next, I suppose, she'll be telling you she owns this house. She doesn't own this house? Oh, now, really? Does a servant ever own her mistress's house? She's your servant? Henry, am I coming through clearly? But she never told me anything about that. Well, let's go into the living room and wait for her. Only please watch those scatter rugs. I simply can't believe Margaret's your servant. Ah, here's Maggie now. Dinner is served, mom. I wonder about those scatter rugs. Here, let me help you out. No, no, no. I'll be all right. Look what Henry brought you, Maggie, a box of meatballs. Oh, Henry, you shouldn't have. You can say that again. And, Margaret, is all this true? Are you really Ms. Brooks' servant? Am I permitted to talk to my friend, mom? Permission granted, but keep it within 10 words, Maggie. We don't want dinner to get cold, do we? Well, that's right, Henry dear. Ms. Brooks is my employer. Then, then all about owning this house, if you're a little nest egg, none of it's true. Oh, that part about the nest egg is true. It is? Yes, indeed. Maggie found it in a tree in back two weeks ago. It ought to hatch any day now. Now, I know you both want to get started with your dinner as soon as possible, so go right ahead into the kitchen, Henry, and sit down. Into the kitchen? Yes, don't bump your head on the ironing board. That way, the sooner Maggie can serve me my dinner, the sooner you can get at the leftovers. Well, let's have no more talk now, right, Maggie? Come in, Henry. Just a moment, Margaret. I'm not very hungry. Frankly, I never expected all this. I'm sorry if I exaggerated a little, dear. A little? This isn't your house, no nest egg? You're Ms. Brooks' servant? But it really doesn't make any difference, does it? As long as we have each other. Well, frankly, I, uh... It doesn't make any difference, does it, Henry? You said last night, regardless of what, love would find a way. And right now, it's looking awfully hard. Well, uh, Margaret, to be perfectly honest, I, I, I... I, I, I. I'll take it. Walter, what are you doing here? You're not due to pick me up for 12 hours yet. Well, I was passing in my car, so I thought I'd drop off some books I borrowed from you. Thanks, and bye. Oh, hi, Mr. Davis. Hey, what are y'all dressed up for? Going to a masquerade? No, Walter, I'm not going to a masquerade. No masquerade? No, but you're going to a funeral, is I? If you had to have a very clever costume. Hey, if I didn't know you owned this place, I swear you were a maid. Walter, blow. You saved my welcome already, Miss Brooks? On this earth by about 16 years. Some people sure have their moods. Well, good night, everyone. Now, Margaret, perhaps you've tell me the reason for this little game you've been playing. I'm sorry, Henry, but I wanted to find out if you really love me. If you would love me if I had nothing in the world. Oh, could you doubt it for a minute, Margaret, little girl? Could you, Margaret, child? Margaret, baby? Once more, and she won't even be born yet. I know it now. I was a fool, Henry. Can you forgive me? Please try to find it in your heart to forgive me for ever doubting you. It will be difficult. But he'll make it. Believe me, Henry, I've learned my lesson. Nothing more will ever come between us. Except the doorbell. I'll get it. Good evening, Miss Brooks. Am I on time? Well, what are you doing here this time of night, sir? And with a relief? Oh, Margaret, darling, I see I am in time. Oh, that's good. What are you doing here? What am I doing here? And who has a better right to be here than your husband? And your own husband? My husband? Certainly. Aren't you going to kiss me, sugar plum? Well, if she doesn't, I am. It's certainly lucky you got here when you did, our good Davis. Our good Davis? Margaret, you mean you're really married to this guy? Henry, of course I'm not. Say not a word of truth in it. This man is an impostor. There, I won't argue. But he is your husband. Henry, you don't believe this, do you? I don't know what to believe anymore. But I'm certainly not taking any chances. Atta boy. Not after being mixed up like this three times before. What? Then you're not a bachelor. Margaret, girl, I haven't been a bachelor since I ran away from junior high with my father. I ran away from junior high with my French teacher. If he said English, I'd have screamed. So if you'll excuse me, I'm getting out of here. Oh dear, oh dear, this is terrible, it's terrible. Then Henry really is the sort of man you told me he was, Connie. With a number of embellishments, I had no idea. But I was good. How did you happen to come over tomorrow? Well, when Boynton told me this afternoon of the tragic mistake you were about to make, Margaret, I knew I had to do something to prevent it. Particularly when he said you wouldn't believe a word of what I told Miss Brooks. But how did you think of this husband role, Mr. Constance? Well, that was just a shot in the dark, Miss Brooks. Well, luckily everything worked out fine. I believe I have an idea how we can prevent this sort of thing from happening again. How dear? From now on, I'll do the ordering by phone.