 Hello and welcome to another video this our second in the Netherlands, where we are because we are here to await it. We are expecting our first child and we decided to come here. Yeah. So welcome to our channel. This is me plus you is us. My name is Kwame. I'm Elaine. And yeah, if you're new to the channel, we share our experiences and talk about our. Yeah. Ghanaian, Dutch, Crossworld, something, something. Yes. Great summary. This one is a special one because a few days ago we had our anniversary. Yeah. Marriage anniversary. How many years? We were married three years. Yeah. And it feels way shorter. I have to admit it feels way shorter. We got married in the before right before the lockdown when the world went into like, you know, the pandemic and 2020. Yeah. And I just can't believe that it's already three years. I think it's a good thing. No. Yeah, it's a good thing. Like that time goes fast, but it's not boring or like it's not. No, it's not. It's not boring at all. It's not boring at all. And I've known her for eight years. But we've been like we became official. We started dating. I was a child when I met him, though. I'm kidding. She always said this. I was 32, which feels very young now. If you look back on it, she always says early. Yeah. Wow. I guess I've always been mature for my age. Yeah, that too. But what? I was a child, isn't it? I'm kidding. It's just it's funny because I'm a child, right? What would you say? But just funny because it feels very old. Yeah, I'm old. I think it's rubbish. But you are as old as you feel and I feel we're doing things at our own time at the right time when we are ready for it. So anyway, no, it's okay. You're fine. You're fine. I thought you were worried about my mic. So it's like no, just let me just move it out a bit. It's just it's so funny because every time I put the mic right and then he just wants to touch it a little little bit like I just want to be in your space. But I understand. Yeah, I just want to be in your space a little. Okay, so as an anniversary edition, I stumbled upon or like I discovered a few memes which I think are very typical for a marriage. So I'm gonna read them and then Krami puts them in the screen like and like I like it when she insists in the video that he's going to put it on the screen. So it says dating text, baby, I don't feel good married text. I've had diarrhea seven times a day. And this is very recognizable for me. Yeah, because in the beginning, you know, when you start dating, you're like, I mean, you're sharing stuff, of course, how you feel and you try but you kind of tip toe rouser that thing. Yeah, you're trying to be prim and proper and everything should be, you know, fit a certain image, you know, yeah. Because in the beginning I was wondering, first of all, I'd never had Elaine fart in front of me. And I would fart. I just fart like I actually fart a lot. That's not a good thing. I don't know if people want to know this, but okay, move on. But you know, you're trying to hold back all these things. And now it's just, it feels like second nature. I mean, this is what is happening to you just say it. Yeah, I think for at least maybe I shouldn't speak for all women, but in my perspective, this kind of a female view that women are not supposed to talk about like doing number two, doing number one. Yeah, it's not ladylike. It's not ladylike, not perceived as ladylike, which of course is rubbish because we're all human beings and we process our food and it should just be normal. But it's not, it's not romantic. And in the beginning also, I also wondered like, yeah, if you start doing these things, will it like decrease, you know, how you look at me or like you don't find me attractive anywhere because she's bloated. Yeah. Which of course is rubbish, but it's just image of what society wants women to look and feel and smell like. And trying to keep it together. Yes. All the time. All the time. Which is of course rubbish. Yeah, it's not sustainable at all. But I think for me, like the last last layer really came down during this pregnancy. Yeah. Because okay, I'm not going to go into gross details or anything because it's not necessary. But just imagine that you're growing and a baby. Yeah. And like there's not a lot of space left, even for my food. Like your stomach is like up here. That's how it feels. So yes, you burp. You have acid reflux. You make weird sounds. Yeah. But even if you are gas, you're not going to hold it because you cannot. You cannot hold the baby in and keep your farts. Like I've just been even. I mean, of course I do it suddenly, but when I have to do it, I have to do it. Yeah, it just goes. You just have to do it. Yeah. Same with number two. I cannot hold the baby in a number two. No. Why would you even do that? It's not even healthy. Yeah. So no. So in same way to go in the being, you have to go. Like I cannot hold it. It's going to hurt me literally. So. Yeah. That last layer crumbled. Yeah. But I don't think it really affected how you look at me. No, I don't. It doesn't like nothing changed. For me, I even prefer it. It's it's you can be your absolute self. Yeah, I think that's kind of freeing. Like even I'm my human self and it's messy, but he's still like. That's how it's supposed to be. We're supposed to like if you're not comfortable, if at this point in your relationship or marriage, you're still not comfortable with the most fundamental human self being. I don't even know how to put it. Then that's weird. Yeah. I mean, you can't tell your partner that this is what's happening to you or maybe can you check if this thing like somebody parts or something on my ass is this or like I have a pimple here and you think that it's embarrassing for them to look at it. No, I think I mean I think maybe you can still be embarrassed about it. But what I do is say like, oh, I have something embarrassing. So, you know, like yeah, I'm not I want to share with you. I want you to check but it's so embarrassing. Yeah. And I often say that why why are you saying it's embarrassing? It's just normal. Yeah. So it's it's it's a new layer of being as free as we are while I mean we're not overdoing it. No, but it's nice that you can be comfortable and vulnerable. Like you should hold back. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. That was a very it started very funny that I became super serious. This one is also good for Netherlands relating to the cold. If you've seen our last video Kwame doesn't like the cold anymore. So when he won't let you put your ice cold feet under his nice warm body and now you're wondering if marriage is even worth it and there's a really cute baby Yoda. So I think this one works rather for me instead because my limbs as in my hands and my legs while being here are always cold. Yeah. So then he wants to I mean sometimes I want to rub her belly and when I touch her belly the way she reacts is almost like yes like you have like I don't know how to describe it. It feels so how dare you touch me with that's how it oh man. So I think yeah that makes me reconsider if marriage is really worth it. Yeah. Because it's hard to warm up together. Because you have to love me and love me for my cold hands as well. You know. They're too cold. I think this one is very recognizable if you're not in marriage but just in like any day honestly is this two ladies keeping each other in short saying what do you want to eat? What are you in the mood for? Yeah. That's just basically it if you live together with somebody that's just it. If you live and you care for each other or yeah. Yeah. It's often that. What do you want to eat? What are you in the mood for? Literally. Yeah. Back and forth the whole time. I think for us for me I find this you're a bit more functional with food especially when you're working. I don't think you mind that much what you eat as long as you eat. You sometimes also forget to eat when you work. Yeah. She brings it up here. When you when you get in the focus zone you you kind of see it as a very functional thing. Well for me food is more like a highlight of the day. So when I cook something nice it's something. It's part of the experience of the day for you. Yeah. And for you it's just like oh and I think actually that's very functional like the Dutch people. Dutch people are also very functional eaters. It's um we it's just oxygen like let's go. Yeah. Let's have a brod. Some brod and go. And and and with the functional uh Dutch people food thing in terms of how they even consume the meal it doesn't have to look good so long as they can chow it down easy. As soon as I've realized this I don't know if it's everybody as soon as the place lands in front of them they mash mash like chik chik chik chik and then starts going so yeah. But with Dutch food it doesn't always look good but it does taste good because when you had my aunt's pea soup. Yeah. How was that for you? It's a very traditional Dutch dish called air to soup. Yeah. pea soup. And I really enjoyed it. When I saw it at first. You're like. I honestly thought I think you have to put an image here of pea soup because it's kind of this gray greenish it's thick like a stew and you're not there's a lot of things in it. I should have put this in the Coach Ashok video. Yeah. It's a lot of things but it's there you yeah it's very you see things in it like lumps and stuff but because it's like vegetable sausage meat but it doesn't look delicious but at least when I tasted it it was it was I was pleasantly surprised it was really good but it was more like a stew for you. Yeah. Because our definition of soup is different. Yeah. We go with the broth looking spicy with you know chunks of meat or fish or something or even if just veggies that's fine. Yeah. So our idea of soup is different. I would call that like a stew and I'll most likely eat it with rice or something some other heavy meal but that was nice. That was nice. I enjoyed it. But for us I think the food the food decisions do are a bit of a pickle from time to time. No. From time to time. Yeah. But we do have now we've managed to have like a roster of dishes we like. We like and we almost always fall back on those when there's stuff in the fridge for them. We just cook those. Yeah. Five things I do. Yeah. If there's room for improvements I think in our marriage then I would say like let's get a few more recipes maybe double the recipes so you have like 10 recipes like rotating instead of. Yeah. Five is a bit limited. Yeah. But I do the I'm not sure but one but I've heard from friends that it's a lot like you're both working you're trying to eat well not order out and all these things and it can be tricky. You have to do groceries you have to think ahead like what do you want to make if it's better to buy in bulk. Because then it's a bit cheaper you don't have to go to store every day which also takes a lot of time. So I do think this is very like underrated as in not discussed a lot. Yeah. But it is a quite important decision so called even though they're small. So yeah. Okay. I can't believe we talked so long about these memes. Yeah it's funny right what it connects. Okay. This one from sarcastic mommy. Oh well I tagged the accounts where the memes came from in the description box. So if you feel like checking them out or see if there's more content that relates to you you can check them out. Sarcastic mommy for marriages between two people. One person who is on the verge of sleep and one person who is asking if the front door is locked. Okay. That's a painful one actually. Is it? Why? Because when you get really comfortable in bed the last thing you want to do is oh shit did we lock the door? Did you lock the door? Do you remember? We actually have a lot of not every night but once in a while it's like did we lock? Yeah. It happens more often than not every night but very often. I think it's also because it's like a routine task so it goes quickly in your brain like you do it but it's not like registered as such because it's like a habit. Yeah. And then you're like was that today or yesterday? Yeah. The same moments. But I often get out to go and check anyway because I'm more security conscious. Yeah but and honestly at this point he's also more mobile no? Before I'm out of the bed it's like 10 minutes later. The house could already be empty by then. That's if it wasn't locked but yeah yeah yeah that's that's basically it. Yeah. Who locked the door and go and check him yeah. Yeah but it's it's really strange sometimes I literally lock before climbing upstairs or going to bed and then you lie down and three minutes later you feel like wait maybe it wasn't today that I did that. Yeah. Why? I have it a lot also with the car lights whether you turn the car lights off or on. Even in Ghana some I often go back to check like I don't know I just don't want to get stuck. Anywhere. Yeah so I'd rather go back for two minutes to see it. Yeah because leaving it on and your battery dies and then you're in convenience. Locking the door situation is worse in Nellis because once you're in the bed you're nice and warm cozy like and you have to walk downstairs and then now come and warm up again. Yeah. No it's not nice. Yeah. It's not nice at all. Okay let's go to the last one. Okay it says nearly dating. I love laying my head on your chest when you're sleeping so I can hear your breathe. Three years later I recorded you snoring so you can hear how fucking loud you are and why you couldn't fucking sleep. This one is actually funny because it happened last week. It's like why am I now as a cold but before that I had the cold first and during the night my nose would get blocked and then apparently I was snoring so one morning I woke up he's like yeah you were snoring this night. Listen to it listen to it. Arrassing me my old bed. Leave me alone. But now I it's the other way around because okay now it's a bit better but a few nights ago the way he was snoring because the cold was in his way so it's not his fault. I knew it was not his fault but I mean hello I want to sleep like this baby will come out at some point and I need my rest. Was too much. Are you going to let him listen to my snoring or? No I'm not going to do that. It was loud. That's a bit much. Yeah let's say it was loud but I just think it's funny how you first saw like oh this is so cute or it is like this is what I could do the whole night and then now things just are a bit more practical. Yeah it's very practical and even you know how oh my bad. What's that? Your beard is getting too long. Barber time. You know how in movies it almost always looks like couples sleep cuddling that's the biggest lie they tell you in these pictures and all these social media videos nobody sleeps cuddling everybody turns around and sleep in their own side and that's the truth. That's the truth. You don't know everybody's truth. No please I don't know which people sleep cuddling the whole time. Your arms are going to go numb and you're going to start sweating or you're going to need to sleep in your own position at some point. I don't know anybody who does this. But in the beginning it's like it's cute you know the person is lying on your chest or you know your cuddly and everything. Yeah now if you smell I'll record you. But I do think that if you're married for or not even married but if you're together for longer the familiarity also makes it nice like the it's like coming home you know you just want to be close with this person. Yeah it's not the newness of it that makes it nice like oh everything is new. No it's more the familiarity of it. Yeah and that you can actually like yeah you you long for that person or for that moment to just either like be in the bed together and yeah it's nice. Yeah or wake up together unless he's more. Yeah so that's basically our if you have any more you can share with us. This is our marriage in memes for now. For now I'm sure there's more. Yes if you have any memes that are very like typical for your relationship we would really love to read. Share with us. Yeah. Yeah share with us. We'd like to see them as well. Yes. And we'll catch you in the next video. Yes we'll catch you in the next video. Enjoy your day. See you later. Bye. Bye.