 Hello everyone, welcome to another NARC's Vivalife video. I did say earlier that I was going to do another one later on, so here it is. And in this one, I am going to be talking about how you can make the narcissist want you more than anything. And when I say anything, I mean anything. If you want them to want you more than their own wife, their own husband, even their own children, the narcissist can want you more than anything in their lives. And I'm really the expert on this topic because I understand the psychology of a narcissist very well. Many of you may know, I have one video, it's titled How to Make the Narcissist Obsessed with You. And this is a video I created about three or four years ago. It's already amounted over 700,000 views, far more views than any other video on that topic. So I'm really the expert when it comes to making a narcissist want you. I can tell you exactly what you need to do if you want the narcissist to want you. But also, I must advise that I really recommend making a narcissist want you. I mean, it's not really good for you at all. It's not going to help you. It may seem like it's something you want in the beginning, but with time you will soon realize that they really are no good for you. I mean, of course, there's narcissists in my life. If I really wanted to, if I really put the effort in, I could make them want me more than anything. I mean, of course, I've done it before. And I am the author of the video with over 700,000 views, How to Make the Narcissist Obsessed with You. Which is, of course, only one of many videos I've done on this topic, which have all gathered a lot of views on YouTube and on TikTok. But despite that, I prefer to leave the narcissist where they are, where they belong, which of course is not with me. But I understand some of you may not be there yet. Maybe you do seek the narcissist validation and you just want them to want you. I completely understand that. But I must advise you to be cautious. Remember you are dealing with a narcissist, someone who can be abusive. They can be very destructive. They may try to harm you. So that's the disclaimer for this video. That's the boring stuff. Now we can get into the meat of it, of how you can actually do it. Or you can get the narcissist to want you more than anything. But what you have to understand first of all, it's not going to be in the way that you might want them. Maybe you're sexually attracted to the narcissist. You have these feelings for them. No, they're never going to have that for you or anyone else. They're never going to feel that sexual attraction, those intense feelings of love or lust. They're never going to have that for you or anyone else. And I don't want to get too deep into that in this video. I have done other videos on that topic already, especially live videos. So do check those out. But I can tell you that the way you feel about them, they're never going to feel that same way about you. It's never going to work out that way. But that doesn't mean that you can't make them want you. Because you can most definitely do that. Just not in a sexual or lustful way. And in fact, first you need to determine what type of supply you are to the narcissist. If you are the primary source, they typically want you to be like a child. Innocent, shy and withdrawn. But you're not openly sexual. You're sexually reserved. Because that will entice them more than anything else. But then also they might get bored of that. It might become too familiar to them. And your supply will begin to lose its potency. When that happens, you need to switch it up. You need to act like more of a secondary source. Where you're wearing sexy outfits and you're more openly sexual with them. But don't forget about what I said. They will never really lust over you or be sexually attracted to you. Sex to a narcissist is just all about power and control. And that's why when they start to feel like they're not getting so much power or control from having sex with you, they will typically withhold it. And they will line up a secondary source for those types of activities. And when that happens, that's when you want to act more like the secondary source. So instead of being shy and withdrawn and sexually reserved, you want to be more sexually open, more willing to try different things. And even then it's not all just about sex. Of course, you want to act in a way where it may improve their status in a social setting. Because up until that point as the primary source, you're really nothing more than just a source of security and stability. That's all that you really are to them. So in any case, really, whether you are the primary or secondary source, you've just got to identify that what you're doing right now is not working. It's not working for you. It's not making them want you. So if that's not working, you need to do the opposite. Obviously, if you do the opposite, that will work. So instead, if you are the primary source and you're just this long-term, sustainable person to the narcissist, you're just there for them when they need you. Just cook them food, clean their clothes. You've got to switch things up a bit. You've got to be more like a secondary source. You've got to be more fun. And what you could do as well is just start going out with your friends. That will really entice them and make them jealous. And they will start to see you in a different way. But you also have to be very careful when you do that. Because another thing that is very important to a narcissist, they want to feel like you are theirs and theirs only. Like to you, in your life, in your world, there is no one else that matters more than them. That you're like their little toy, their little plaything. This object that exists solely for their use. That is any narcissist's ultimate fantasy. In fact, their worst nightmare is having to share a source with someone else. If you want to make a narcissist lose attraction for you and to detach from you, just do that. Just entertain other prospects, other options. They will often forget about you very quickly. Because they want to feel like you're all theirs. That you only belong to them. That you're their little toy, their little plaything. That's what narcissists want. But as I said, you can kind of tease them. There are little ways you can make them jealous. But just don't take it too far. Because if you do, it will cause a narcissistic injury. And they're not going to want you after that. Then they're really going to hate and despise you. So be very careful when you're trying to make them jealous. Although that can be effective as well, it can make them want you. So yeah, all you have to do is identify what does this narcissist want? What is their dream? What is their fantasy? And just be that, because if you are not that and you're not satisfying their need for power and control then all that's going to happen is you're going to frustrate them. It's going to irritate them. And then they will immediately shift their focus onto something else other than you. And in fact, you're going to be the last thing on their mind. Because the last thing any narcissist wants is to experience any form of frustration. Any sense of loss of power or control. No narcissist wants that. They want to feel like they own you. Like you belong to them and don't need them. That is what a narcissist wants. Trust and believe when you get a narcissist in that type of situation they will be crazy about you. They really will. When they feel like you are exclusive you are theirs and only theirs. But as long as they take action, as long as they reach out and grab you they have to do something to make it happen. There needs to be something to entice them, to motivate them. But it's not so much about playing hard to get. They need to feel like you are attainable. Remember Narcissus, they are pretty easy. They will settle for whatever they can get. So you don't want to make it too hard for them. They need to focus their attention on something that is easier for them. That is typically what they do. They need you to be susceptible to their manipulation. You need to validate the false self. You need to validate the illusion. If you are not doing that they are not going to want you. Why would they want anyone who doesn't validate the false self? I wouldn't make any logical sense. If you are not validating the false self they will just forget about you in an instant. And instantly their mind will be on someone or something else. If you want to get their full attention you want their mind to only be on you. You need to fulfill that fantasy. And remember it's not so much a sexual or lustful thing so sex can be a part of it as well. It's more about power and control. They need to feel like they have power and control over you. And they need to feel like it's good for their image. As though it improves their social position. If you can do that they will be crazy about you. Of course it is definitely far easier to attain this level of obsession from a narcissist in the beginning. To get that later on it can be a bit more difficult. But that's not to say that it can't still be done. You just have to revamp everything that you have shown to them up until that point. You need to recognise how you've been portraying yourself to them. Is it more of a primary or secretary source? And whichever one it is just do the opposite. Because clearly what you've been doing up until that point it hasn't been working to do the opposite. Maybe you were a source of stability to the narcissist. So instead of doing that start bringing more fun and amusement. Stop being so serious. And especially for those of you who were the long term primary source. Now this is very important. You really need to drop the ego. Because that is often what's standing in the way. Of them obsessing over you. It's because of your ego. And I'm not blaming you for that. I know of course they put us in a position when naturally we do become egotistical. Because we're trying to defend to protect our self identity. But when you do that it becomes a competition. It's like a power play between you and them. So you do need to humble yourself. And then they will have less resistance towards you. Because when you're egotistical I can tell you. It just repels them. It just pushes them away completely. Remember Narcissus they have to be the center of attention. They have to feel like they are the best. They don't want to be competing with you. They want you to worship them. To admire them. To shower them with excessive compliments and praise. But then even once you do that you then have to pull back a little bit as well. Because otherwise they will get too used to it and they will get bored. And then they'll start so you can supply from somewhere else. So there needs to be this hot and cold. This push and pull. You can't just be constantly on. Because if you're on all of the time they will get used to it. And they will get bored. Your supply will lose its potency. They will no longer be sensitive to it. And then they will go looking for it from someone else. So that's something to keep in mind as well. If you're finding this video helpful please remember to give it a thumbs up down below. As it helps a YouTube algorithm to get this very important message out there to other survivors. It's very important please give the video a thumbs up. But yes this is what you have to do. If you want the Narcissus to want you more than anything. But remember it's never going to be in that way that you're thinking. In that way that you may want. Where they're lusting over you. The reality is. They don't actually even care about who you even are. As a person. It means nothing to them you're just an object. We are all just objects. That's all that we are. And we are never going to be anything more than that. And you are either an object that's in their way. That's taking the spotlight away from them. That's making them feel insecure. That's invalidating the false self. Or you are an object that is working in their favor. That's making them feel good about themselves. That's propping up their false image in front of other people. So if you want the Narcissus to want you. You need to be a good little object. As patronizing as that may sound. That is the reality of it. You need to be a good little object for the Narcissus. But at the same time don't be too good. Don't let them get used to it. You need to pull back a little bit sometimes. You need to make them work for it. But you just got to look at it like this. I mean you decided to click on this video. Because up until this point it's like the Narcissus doesn't want you. So you got to start doing the opposite. Whatever you've been doing up until this point. You need to do the opposite of what you've been doing. And a lot of times as I said it is down to ego. Many of us as victims when we're in relationships with Narcissus. We can become quite egotistical ourselves. Because the way they attack and lash out at us. We're just trying to protect ourselves. But the more that you hold on to your ego. It's just going to become a competition. They're going to constantly try to outdo you. And that's only going to distance them from you. And you don't want them to be distant. You want them to be closer to you. It's the best way to get them to be closer to you. So drop the ego for a moment. Praise them. Compliment them a little bit. And then pull back. Don't give them too much attention. Because that can turn them away as well. If they start getting used to it. They've got all of your validation. Of course if they've got it. They're not going to want it anymore. You're not going to want something that you already have. We want things that we don't already have. So you give them a little bit. And then you pull back. You give them a little bit again. And then you pull back again. And also you identify. But maybe up until this point. As their primary source you've been acting a bit serious. So you need to be a bit more playful. Start laughing. Smiling a bit more when you're around them. Start looking like you're having a lot of fun without them. That's how you don't even need them. That's going to cause them to become curious about you. They're going to want to know what's going on. They may develop more interest in you. If you show them that you can be happy. You can have a good time without them. They're going to want to see what's going on with you. And if maybe they can be a part of the action. But also another thing as I said is. Narciss. They want to feel like someone is theirs. They do not want to share you with anyone else. They want to feel like you are their property. Their object, their toy, their plaything. So those of you who are secondary sources. You may need to change up how you dress. Dress a bit more modest. Don't reveal too much of your body. When you're going out with them. And don't always initiate sex. Act a little bit more innocent. More modest. More reserved. So then it makes them make more of an effort with you. I mean you're going to know more than me. What you really need to work on. To make them want you more. Because it's really whatever you've been doing up until this point. There needs to be a balance. You can't just be all one way the entire time. You can't always be hot. Sometimes you've got to be cold. You can't always push. Sometimes you've got to pull. I can see in the live chat if anyone is interested in the topic of this video. There's really no reason for you to be here at all. I mean you're just kind of ruining it for the other viewers. I've already given a disclaimer at the beginning of the video. That I do not advise even trying to get the narcissist back. It's not something that I would personally do myself. But those of you who do want to do that. You are all adults. You will have your own free will. You are allowed to make your own choices and decisions. And this is the information it is for educational purposes only. If you decide to try it out that is up to you. That is your own decision. And I hope that you get the results that you are looking for by using it. But as for anyone else who is not interested in the content of this video. All you have to do is click off it. Just watch one of my other videos or another video on YouTube. Or just do whatever else you want to do if you're not enjoying this. If it doesn't vibe with you. But I am going to continue because I can see there's 166 live viewers. So people are clearly interested in this and they need this information. But yeah if you are finding it helpful please do give it a thumbs up down below as well. I can see there's 166 live viewers. Only 21 thumbs ups. It really helps the YouTube algorithm to get this message out there. So please hit that thumbs up button down below. Thank you. But yeah you just have to identify what you've been doing up until this point. And then do the opposite. But then don't do the opposite too much as well. There needs to be a balance. It needs to be hot and cold, push and pull. And like I said the narcissists they want to feel like you are all theirs. Like you belong to them. You're their toy. They're a little play thing. And they want that because more than anything they want power and control. They do not want to be around anyone or anything. That makes them feel powerless or out of control. That's how they already feel. If you can make a narcissist feel powerful that will make them want you more than anything else in their lives. If they're married they will make them want you more than their own husbands or wives. More than their own children. If you can just make them feel powerful. But I am going to start hiding people from the live chat who are causing an interference for other people who are commenting. You know that's really what you've got to do. If a narcissist does not want you. Because they don't feel powerful. They don't feel in control when they are around you. That's why they don't want you. So you need to make them feel powerful. You need to feed in to the false self. The false reality and the illusion. The delusions of grandeur. Make them feel like they're the most amazing person alive. Do that for a little while and then pull back. Leave them to chase after you. But they're not just going to chase after you for nothing. You've got to show them that there's something to chase after. You've got to give them a little something first. You've got to give them compliments and praise. You've got to admire them. And then pull back to leave them wanting more. So that's all you've really got to do. And I can pretty much guarantee that this will work. I have one video. It's titled How To Make The Narcissist Obsessed With You. It has over 700,000 views. More views than any other video on that topic. So I'm really the expert when it comes to this kind of stuff. And if you want the narcissist to want you more than anything, all you've got to do is just follow the advice in this video. And I can almost guarantee that they will want you a lot more. So yeah, that's it for this one. I just like to thank you all for joining me on another Narcissist With You video. And don't forget to show your support down below. Very important by giving this video a thumbs up. Let's get this very important message out there to other survivors who may be feeling alone and wanted by the narcissist. Let's make this video available to them by hitting that thumbs up button down below. And let me know what you think about this video as well. You don't need to tell me so much if you disagree with it. I mean, of course, I already know that some people aren't interested in this type of topic. But let's leave this for the viewers who are getting something out of it. Those who can use it. So yeah, let me know your thoughts in the comments section. Let me know if this works for you or not. And hit that subscribe button and click the bell icon down below as well. Click all notifications so that you will be notified when I upload a future video. And if you would like to buck a one-on-one with me, just go to my website. It is NarcSurvivor.co.uk. And also, you can follow me on Instagram. It's NarcSurvivor YouTube. If you could send me a message on there, I will respond. And I have new pictures and videos of my travels that I upload every day on there on my Instagram. It's NarcSurvivor YouTube. So follow me on there. Other than that, I hope you all enjoyed this video this evening. And as always, I look forward to talking with you again very soon.