 As-salamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. I wanted to specifically concentrate on raising children, especially with everything we just heard from Shaykh Azaynab and the importance of really maintaining a strong identity in these times, how we can build our children with resilience. And so the first aspect of that is obviously in order to raise your children in a certain way you have to be able to model that in yourself. So the very first focus here that I hope, there's three points I'm going to address, but this one is the first, which is in our tradition the hadith that we usually reference especially with leadership in general is this particular hadith, which is every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. And the hadith goes through the different roles of leaders, of men, of women. And so for women it's very clear here, a woman is the guardian of her husband's home and his children and she is responsible for them. So I have always loved this because it's such a powerful, again, analogy to leadership but also parenting because think of a shepherd and I purposely picked this image here because this is a female. She is out there, she's wearing her hijab, masha'Allah. She has her staff and the shepherd is, if you have ever learned about shepherding, it is a role that requires a lot of knowledge. You have to build your knowledge of what you're going to do, how you're going to take care of the animals that you're going to look after and obviously be on a schedule, you have to be a regimented person, you have to be a disciplined person, you have to be a person that has all of these qualities and also has the tools necessary. And so I think the shepherd analogy is just genius on so many levels because in fact, again, as we see with mothering and parenting in general, there is no handbook, you do have to learn and the best way to learn of course is to surround yourself with excellent models, people that you can learn from. And so in our tradition, this is why it's so important, we were just having a conversation about women sharing spaces like this and learning from each other and having time to actually watch and observe. I was reading earlier about mirror neurons, this incredible part of our brain that helps us to be empathic. It's all through mimicking and modeling that we adopt those virtues and good qualities. It's because we're watching someone else. Now how many of you by show of hands in your mothering journey have you felt more isolated than surrounded by the village that we all need? How many of you have felt isolation? So when we look at why we struggle, a lot of times this is partly wise because we don't have that opportunity to watch our mothers and grandmothers and aunts and other female family members or friends who have children ahead of us. We're not really having those types of gatherings and meetings, we're not socializing on that level and that can make us feel very isolated. So shepherding back to this analogy, again, it's about leadership and really understanding what that entails. So specifically to shepherding, right? What do we get here? Being humble. This is very important. You have to admit that this is a new domain. You don't know a lot of things and you have to be willing to take advice, you have to be willing to open. You're going to have unsolicited advice if you've ever had children, you know what that is. You'll have people telling you about everything. How to dress your child, how to feed your child, how to birth your child, all of it. But that's okay. Let it, you know, Hamdullah, welcome that because this is a domain that you haven't yet learned about. So humility is really important. Responsibility. Motherhood, parenting in general, it's an amana, just like the shepherd is responsible for the flock. Allah is giving you the charge of making sure they're well fed, they're safe, that you're protecting them from the harm. You have to see your children not as little, you know, extensions of you which is a very nefcy sort of impulse that unfortunately has come into parenting. People just want to have little trophy children. This is totally, you know, alien to our tradition. I remember many years ago I had a debate with a brother, Mashallah, he was a very learned brother and he made a claim. He said most parents are very selfish and I was like, what do you mean by that? He said, yeah, they're selfish. Ask them why they want children. And so I started to go through all these different reasons. I said, well, you know, they want to have children to love. He's like, that's selfish. That's a selfish reason. He's like, you just want a child just to love the child. That's very selfish. And I want to continue my family name, that's selfish, to take care of me in the future. That's selfish. So everything I was trying to offer, he was like, it's selfish. And then he said something and I'll never forget it. He said, where is the parent who says, I want to produce the next Salah for Dina La Yubi. Where's that parent? That is the intention of parenting, right? So he said, if you're not parenting with that intention, you're a selfish person. And that really opened my eyes because intentionality with everything that we do, we say Bismillah, with everything that we do, even with when you want to have children. Why do you want to have children? So to see it, that this is an amana from Allah, when he blesses you with a child and to also make sure that you yourself are willing to submit because not everything is going to go your way. There are many people, myself included, I mean, how many of us who had children walked into the hospital with a birth plan, right? My older sisters left the entire time I walked into the hospital. They're like, yeah, good luck with that. Throw it out. It's right. And Dr. Irvin, you know best. Nothing will go. I wanted candles. I wanted soft music. No, no, no. I just was telling Purim in the car. I'm like, I hope I'm not traumatizing. We told her our birth stories of Sadda Fadwa and I. And I was like, 46 hour labor, like, you think you're going to die? So you have to be willing to submit. Allah is in control, right? That's a prerequisite of being a really strong mother. And also making sure that you don't allow your enoughs to get ahead of you, right? All of these things we're talking about is making sure that you are in, again, submission to Allah, because Allah challenges us. He says, have you not seen the one who takes his own desire as God? And that's where living in this very materialistic culture, we can get absorbed with the commercialization of parenting. How many people plan more for their nursery and for their photos that they're going to take than actually thinking about, how am I going to discipline this child? How am I going to teach this child? How am I going to put them on the Dean of Huck? How am I going to do those things? Those are the things that should keep us up at night, not where's my photo shoot going to happen, right? So we have to really come back to this question, you know, don't worship your desires, worship Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta'ala. Being dutiful, devoted and watchful, just like a shepherd, we have to be ahead. I can't tell you how many conversations I have with parents who are unfortunately willfully ignorant. They don't want to know certain things. I was just actually speaking with Osada Fadwa as well about some parents who even in the older phases of parenting, you know, they turn a blind eye because it's uncomfortable for them. You know, they don't want to know about what their children are doing online. They don't want to know about the companions that they're keeping. This is very dangerous. It's akin to a shepherd leaving the gate open for the wolves to come in. How are you protecting your children if all of your gates are open? The boundaries have to be closed, and that's on you to make sure the gates are locked, right? That's on you. So being watchful, always present, where are my children? Who are they with? Who are they spending time with? This is how the shepherd leads. And then being upright, resilient and confident, very important, as I said, our children, we know this, it's researched, it's very clear. They learn best when you are modeling the right character for them. So you have to make sure that when you want them to have a strong Muslim identity, that you are embracing your own identity. If you're going to tell them to pray, but you don't pray. If you tell them to read Quran, but you're not reading Quran. And these are, you know, I've talked to many teachers of Quran who have these conversations with the parents. Their parents come to complain to them, my child doesn't want to read Quran. He's in a heif's program. He's doing this. He's doing that. She's doing this. She's doing that. And then the teacher will ask them, do you read Quran? I don't know how to. So that's it. Because you don't know how to, you're never going to even try. I mean, think about how, you know, we talk about self-harm as a physical thing. To me, that's soul harm, right? If you do not, you know, understand the weight of not having access to the Book of Allah, as being harming yourself, let's, you know, make that clear right now. And I invite every sister here to never let what we call blame-worthy modesty, right? It's actually a disease of the heart because, you know, modesty is usually this concept that we understand in a positive sense. But there is blame-worthy modesty, which is your, you let your haia or your shame prevent you from learning. If you don't know Tajweed, you haven't learned the Book of Allah, please don't let your nefs dictate to you. You have to say, it doesn't matter if I'm 50, 60, 70, 80 years old. If Allah SWT has given me life every single day as an opportunity, I have to go and be that person who's going to prioritize and make sure that I have that strong identity. So this is how we model. We have the upright, resilient and confidence in our faith, resilience and confidence in our faith. So this is how we shepherd. And there's much more to this, but again, in the interest of time, we're going to move on. And this hadith is really the one that I think every mother holds onto, right? Even before you become a mother. We can't wait to use this on someone, right? We can't wait. We memorize it. We don't know a lot of Quran, but every woman knows this hadith. And the one about Jannah being under our foot, right? Masha'Allah. It's good. We should know all of these hadith, but we should also know that this is earned. It's not given. It's earned. If you want this status, you have to earn it. And how do we earn it? We have to understand that the Muslim mother is honored and she's honorable, right? So we are honored. Alhamdulillah. We're elevated. Look at the entire seerah of the Prophet ﷺ from the beginning of his mission and to the end of his mission. He was constantly elevating women. And that's why we're here today. Look at us. I mean, honestly, I just, it's so beautiful. I wish you saw what we saw as speakers. This is breathtaking, beautiful, modest women here learning, you know, their deen praising Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta'ala. This is such a great honor for us. But we also have to remember that it's earned, as I said. So how do we earn this honor? What does it mean to be honored and honorable? Means being modest in word, in speech, in conduct and dress. Very important because I'm seeing, and this is not to call out any specific generation, but honestly, the trends that we see online are very disturbing to the soul. When you see young Muslims who are very strong and Mashallah, they have passion when they speak. But then in the same breath that they talk about their faith, they will drop an F-bomb. This is unacceptable. We do not curse. We do not use foul language as Muslim women or as Muslims. We do not dress inappropriately. We do not speak about inappropriate things, foul things. We are not vulgar people. We are honorable people. Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta'ala elevated us. So we have to elevate our speech, right? And here in the Qur'an, Qada Aflaha Al-Muminun, right? Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta'ala says, successful indeed are the believers. Go through all of these. Whenever I read verses of the Qur'an, especially when describing certain groups, we should. This is how we check ourselves. You have to look in your own spiritual mirror and say, do I follow into any of these? Am I humble? Do I avoid idol talk? Am I wasteful in my speech? Do I waste my time talking about nonsense that will never benefit me or anyone else and potentially harm people? Because sometimes we talk about things and we're not realizing that we could be sending someone down a very dark rabbit hole with things that we speak about. You put a plant, a very bad seed, a weed, not a seed, right? And someone's mind. And the next thing, you know, they're going down and searching and looking and now you're going to be held accountable. Why did you bring up that topic or that, you know, that, oh, I watched this movie and now this person's watching the movie. Not only are they watching the movie, they've abandoned their Salah. They've abandoned the Qur'an. So we have to be very careful when we come together to make sure that our speech is valuable, right? That our way of being brings value. And this is how we are honored and what it means to be honorable. And of course, chastity and modesty. This is not just the domain of Muslim women, although it's always seems to be framed that way. Every believer, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says, every believer, men and women alike must be modest in dress, conduct, speech, all of that. So this is how we maintain our honor. And then the third part, the Muslim mother is a refuge strong and secure subhanallah. When I think of my own journey into motherhood, and I know there's there may be even women here who have struggled with infertility and may have even gone through procedures. I actually know very, very dear beloved people to me who have gone through procedures where the womb, their womb has been removed. And there is this spiritual connection that sometimes we don't realize. It's very real that the word, the womb, right? It comes from the same word, racham, right? As one of the, or the attributes of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, ar-rahman ar-rahim, racham. So we are connected very much to our creator through the womb. Whether you're a mother or not, by the way, it doesn't matter if you've never had children or not, you have this capacity, right? And so really seeing yourself as a place of refuge. If you're a mother, that your children, your family, your husband as well. We have to also mention this because we're in a time in age where men and women are being constantly pitted against each other. And there's so much divisive language and we're seen as enemies. We're not. We're complimentary to each other. And so we should provide that type of security for one another. But just to have that mindset that if I am to embrace this role of mother, I also want to be a place where my children, my loved ones always feel like they can come back. And so this is where practicing compassion. You may find with your children as they get older, they're going to have struggles. They're going to have questions. They're going to have, they're going to bring up maybe topics that bother you. You know, why don't, don't respond. Why are you asking that? Because I hear from teens all the time, they get the door slammed in their face, you know, by, by their own parents on topics, you know, that they are curious about LGBTQ, whatever it is, whatever controversial topic there is, be a place where your children come to you. You should be the first point more than, certainly before the internet, before their friends, you have to be that person that I want to be the one that my children feel safe talking to me about these things. Because if you don't teach your children how to navigate these, there are wolves and sheeps clothing who are ready to jump on them and take them and consume them. And they will. Eat apart their souls and that's exactly what they're doing. So you have to be that shepherd, that protector, that place of refuge for your children. So be that in your spirit, in your ability to listen before you, you know, condemn or before you judge. And these are very important, you know, concepts again, connecting back to, to our natural disposition as women. We, most of us, inshallah, all of us have these qualities of nurturing and loving and protecting. But it's just really important to see yourself as this in the capacity of motherhood. Now the next slide here also is more on, you know, compassion and building this empathy. I mentioned mirror neurons. If you've heard me speak, you know, I talk a lot about emotional intelligence and, you know, this concept of empathy is the fourth quality of emotional intelligence. It's something we have to inculcate. And this is where, you know, working on your nerves, if you have a hard time feeling empathy for people. That is a spiritual problem because the Prophet, so I said him, was empathic to all creation. And he had empathy for birds and camels and animals. And even Ahud, when he was on Ahud and it started to tremble, right? What did he do? He gently tapped it and said, it'd be calm. So if he can have empathy to the creation of Allah, we have to question where is the empathy within our own hearts. So inculcate these things and make it a priority that you work on your own nerves so that you can, inshallah, possess this beautiful virtue of empathy. And these are just further hadiths, just as reminders of the power of the womb. Don't underestimate the power of the womb. It will in fact be given the capacity to speak like all of our limbs. So when you practice, when you don't practice empathy, and I've seen this, unfortunately, in our community, where relations are cut, people get, you know, done. I'm done with her. I don't want to talk to her. This is not our way. This is not our language. This is not our language to have rifts in families. We should know this is a Qaba'ir. From the 17 Qaba'ir, which are the enormities, it's among the top, to cut people off. So if you know family members, aunts, or grandparents, or whoever, where these things exist, work on softening the hearts, especially as the month of Ramadan draws near, we should really be intentional about trying to remove this break in family. Sheikh Al-Zaynab mentioned this, that this is what this culture aims to do, to divide, destroy families, to break families apart. They would love nothing more than all of us to be cut off from one another. But our Lord calls us to not do that and to actually resist our own nafs and to work on practicing empathy, being understanding that people are struggling. We have so many challenges, subhanAllah. And so again, I'm sorry, I don't know how much time I have left, but just in the last two slides, because I'm sure you can see the theme here. Mashallah, Sheikh Al-Zaynab did much better with bringing her kathiyah. But our hearts, our hearts, where are they? We're here, but our hearts are somewhere else. And so I wanted to just take a moment, because these are the extraordinary mothers that we learn from. Look at their example. Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't change this slide. I mean, I'm sure we saw all of these in the pictures and videos that were coming out. These are the ones that, when I would look at them, my heart. I mean, look at this woman, mashallah, bathing her children in the middle of rubble, smiling, that is what a mother does. She shields her children from the harm around her. So learn feeding, protecting, covering, dragging, making da'a to Allah subhanAllah, constantly turning to Allah. This is the mother that we aim to be. Not the mother who, again, is all over social media in her polished, filtered world. That is not the mother you want to be. And I'm not judging people. I'm just saying, don't aspire for that. Aspire for the faith of women like this. This is what motherhood is in our deen. And this woman, mashallah. She just took my breath away when I saw this picture. One of my favorite hadith is, al-mu'min, al-mir'at al-mu'min. And it's a challenge, because what it means is that we're supposed to reflect beauty to one another. We're supposed to reflect, and I think most of us, the reason why we're moved by these images is because we see in these women what we hope we have, the qualities that we wished we possessed. So when we see their strength, I mean, she looks like everything that we just talked about, strong, honorable, devout. Look at her hands. I mean, those are the hands of a working woman, right? Humble, courageous, resilient, modest, watchful. So this is the definition of motherhood in our deen. May Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la make us, inshallah, the best of mothers, may He give us strength and help us to raise children who love Him and love His Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Jazakumullahu khayran wa sallamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.