 Is the narcissist having fun without you? Are they having fun without you? Are they having a good time? The answer isn't that simple. Their idea of fun might be very different from your idea of fun. A narcissist's idea of fun usually involves some form of escapism. Seeking distraction and relief from their unpleasant reality. Seeking entertainment or engaging in fantasy. Their idea of fun is a mental diversion from boring aspects of their daily lives. They engage in these activities or behaviours to occupy themselves from persistent feelings of depression or general sadness. Many of these activities or behaviours may be addictive. It may give them a sense of reward, even though it may be damaging to their health. And this is what they attribute to them having fun. This is what they attribute to them having a good time. A narcissist's idea of fun will usually involve some form of escapism. This may include alcohol, drugs, sex, bars and clubs, shopping, gambling, movies, video games or anything else that helps to distract them from their unpleasant reality. They also find enjoyment and amusement at other people's expense. They enjoy putting people down, insulting them, making them feel less than who they really are. This makes the narcissist feel more than what they really are, which again is another form of escapism. It helps to distract them from their unpleasant reality. But while this may be considered fun to them, it may not be fun to you. A healthy, functional person is going to find enjoyment in reality, focusing on things that really matter, self-development, deep conversations, nature, intimacy. These are the types of things that are going to appeal to someone who enjoys life. The problem is, narcissists do not enjoy their lives, so they spend each day trying to distract themselves from their lives by engaging in escapism. Pain that will numb the pain, and while these activities and behaviours may act as a temporary form of relief, the pain doesn't go away, it keeps coming back, and as time goes by they become more and more detached from reality, more embedded into these forms of escapism. They're dead inside, they're more machine than human because they have life inside of us. We cannot keep running from the present moment. We have to accept the truth and reality of the situation, no matter how painful it may be. Narcissists don't do this. They do everything they can to distract themselves from their pain and shame. They do everything they can to distract themselves from reality, and that is why they are always so angry, that is why they are always so miserable, because they're not really living, and while it may often seem as though they are having fun, it isn't real, they've just found a way to trick their minds into believing that they are having fun, by using mind-altering substances who engage in in activities or behaviours that help to distract them from reality. It's no different to virtual reality, they have created their own simulations that are more favourable to them, to how they would like to see their lives, and they discard anyone who doesn't validate this illusion, anyone who doesn't believe in what they choose to portray, which only leaves them to be surrounded by people who believe in the illusion. It's shared psychosis, the people around them take on their delusions, and believe that it's real. It's like a group of people who drink or do drugs together, they think they're having a great time, and it feels real to them, but to anyone who's sober and doesn't know that they've ingested something, they look completely insane, they look like they're detached from reality, and it's the same thing with these narcissists, they are detached from reality, they have found a way to trick their minds into believing that they are having fun, but it isn't real, and the activities and behaviours that they engage in are often not what you would see as fun anyway, they're just forms of escapism, sometimes the narcissists will intentionally engage in activities and behaviours that they know you are interested in, things that they know you would enjoy, they do this in an attempt to project their feelings of envy and jealousy onto you, they want you to take on their emotions, when they see you, you are often engaged in something that they would like to partake in, something that they would like to be a part of, and it makes them feel a certain way, but as I said earlier, narcissists don't want to deal with reality, they don't want to acknowledge their emotions, it's too painful for them to deal with, they would rather project their emotions onto you, so this is often what they will do, and they will do this by engaging in activities and behaviours that they know you like, they might not even enjoy it, it could be greatly unfulfilling for them, you might enjoy going out in nature, and just because they know you enjoy it, they will be out there taking pictures and acting as though they're having a great time, but deep down, they are miserable, they don't see any point in it, they're just pretending to enjoy it, because they know that you do, and I believe that deep down, they wish they could get the same fulfilment as we do, they wish that they could just be normal and enjoy reality, but for them to do that, they would have to accept all of the negative aspects of reality too, like certain emotions, instead of projecting it onto other people, they would have to accept that, and that is just too painful for them to deal with, so they continue living in this simulation that they have created to distract themselves from their unpleasant reality, tricking their minds into believing that they're actually having fun.