 Vicks Matinee Theater. Vicks Matinee Theater, presented by the makers of Vicks Vatronal, brings you my favorite wife, starring Victor Jory as Nick Arden and supported by Betty Winkler as Ellen and Martha Sleeper as Bianca. You know, more and more millions of people are using Vicks Vatronal nose drops to relieve distress of head cold, benefit by their experience. Ladies and gentlemen, today from the stage of the Matinee Theater, Vicks brings you one of the most amusing love stories ever told. Leo MacCarrie's delightful comedy romance, my favorite wife. As the curtain rises, we're in the Los Angeles County Court of General Sessions. Judge Walter Bryson presiding. Good morning, your honor. Good morning. It would be very kind of you. Just a moment. Look, wasn't I supposed to marry someone? Why, yes. Yes, your honor. Well, let's get it over with. If you'll pardon me just a moment, your honor. I'm Nick Arden. The Arden case is a very complicated case. It can wait for the wedding, can't it? Not very well, your honor. Very well, Mr. Arden. I don't see anyone around waiting to get married anyhow. Mr. Arden, as I understand that your wife, Ellen Wagstaff-Arden, was a member of an anthropological expedition shipwrecked off the coast of of Indochina. Is that right, Mr. Arden? That's right. What was she doing on an expedition? You'll find the circumstances set forth in my brief, sir. Oh, let's see. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Said Ellen Wagstaff-Arden was engaged as photographer for a period of three months. You see, in the first place, we were going to take the trip together, but, well, I became involved in the case. Well, let me read the brief, Mr. Arden. Yes, your honor. And stop interrupting. Yes. Ellen Wagstaff-Arden was last seen entering one of the lifeboats on the wave. Oh, that's very sad, very sad. What effort did you make to taste the whereabouts of your wife? On page eight. I went to Bangkok and interviewed the all the available survivors who agreed the said Ellen Wagstaff-Arden had been overboard for a creature, deposition, appendix. Yes, your honor. The testimony is here. Sworn out for David's. No evidence to the contrary. Law is clear. I hereby pronounce Ellen Wagstaff-Arden legally dead. Now then, wasn't I supposed to marry somebody? Yes, sir, me. Just a minute. I'll call Bianca. She's right outside. Come in there. Are you going to marry again? Yes, your honor. Are you quite sure you've had time to think it over? Your honor, Mr. Arden is over 21. Now, now, Bianca. All right. Hold hands. Ellen, I can't believe it. Oh, I hear no more take it easy. It's not as bad as all there. I just can't believe it. How's Nikki? Yes. You know, your son, my husband. Oh, he's fine. Where have you been, Ellen? Let it you 12 longitude 128. And I'd still be there if a Portuguese freighter hadn't wandered two miles off its course. Where's Nikki? Well, Ellen, sit down and I'll tell you. When? Where is he? Sit down and I'll tell you. Now, my name is Arden, Nicklas Arden. I have a reservation. Oh, yes, sir. Mr. Mrs. Nicklas Arden. The bridal suite is. France boy. I certainly feel dusty after all that drive. The bath will be wonderful. Mr. Arden, may I speak to you privately for a moment? Of course, sir. Excuse me, Bianca. Did you want a bellhop share? Just a moment, boy. I want you to take Mr. Mrs. Arden to Suite B. I'll go on up to the room, darling. All right. I'll be right up. Mr. Arden, there's a lady waiting to see you in Suite A. A lady? I think you'd better go up for a moment, sir. She says her name is Mrs. Arden. Mrs. Arden. Mrs. Arden. It was just as beautiful as I thought it would be. When did you get back? This morning. I want all the details. How you got back where you've been. Lord, you look wonderful. Where have you been? On an island in the South Pacific. I'll give you the details, but it'll take time. How did you know I was here? Ma told me. Nick, what are you going to do about Bianca? Oh, I'm just, Bianca? Heavens, I forgot all about Bianca. Oh, this isn't going to be easy. Bianca's very sensitive. She's high strung. Uh-oh. Yes? What do you want? Mr. Arden, we run a first-class hotel and we don't like to be made a party to an entry. We've maintained a reputation for respectability for 30 years, and we don't intend to lose it in one night. But it's really a very simple situation, Mr. Roomkirk. Explain it to him, Nick. Explain it to him. Of course I will. That is, I'll try. I see, I came up here with my wife, my bride, really. Now my wife. Not my bride. Oh, why should I bore you with the tales? I won't be bored. Well, Mr. Arden, one wife is all the law or the hotel allows. One of them will have to leave. Look, Nick, darling, it's really very simple. I'll go home, and then you go tell Bianca what's happened, and then you come home. That sounds simple to you, doesn't it? Oh, very simple. Is that satisfactory with the hotel? Very satisfactory. Well, then it's all settled. Go ahead, darling. Uh, right now? Right now. Oh, well, all right. Anybody home? Come on in, Bianca. Ma, he's brought her home. He couldn't have told her then. Ma! In the living room, dear. I don't know of a situation. Yes, isn't it? Listen, Ma, I'll be a visitor from the south. In the living room, Nicky, darling. Hello. Hello, Mother Arden. Hello, Bianca. Did you have a nice time? No. We drove all night. Hi, the nigglers, honey. You all won't mind if I kiss the bridegroom, will you, honey? Not at all. Just one big, sisterly kiss. That sisterly kiss is kind of getting away from you, isn't it? Oh, that was just as nice as ever, honey. What a shame she had to stop us. Kill you again. I don't believe I've met this lady. She, um, she's visiting with us. Her mother and I went to school in Virginia. I feel just as though she's my own daughter. How nice. Isn't he just the sweetest thing you ever saw? I used just a dough, and he was a dough on his boy you ever did see. But faithfully, just like a bumblebee going from flower to flower. I warn you, I've had about enough. So have I. Nick, I'm very tired. Do you think we might excuse ourselves until morning? Of course, Bianca. I'll take you up to your room, Bianca. You do that more. I'll be right up, Bianca. My hope's on it. Why didn't you tell her at the hotel, Nick? Well, I kept building up to it, but I couldn't seem to get there. Well, you better tell her now or forget about telling her entirely. Fun's fun, but it's stop being fun now. Okay, okay. Give me a kiss, darling. All right. Casanova. I'll be Bianca. Stop crying and listen to me. I've got to talk to you. Do you love me, Nick? Oh, don't you? In the name of heaven, tell me what's wrong with me. Bianca, there's nothing wrong with you. Now, believe me, under other circumstances, you... Bianca, please stop crying. Let me explain. We've been married for two days, and you haven't so much as kissed me since we left the You just keep still and listen. That's better. Now, I... Well, I... Darbell! That's for me. I'll be right back. Jordan, yeah? I'm Johnson of the American Life and Accident Insurance. Well, come right in, Mr. Johnson. Thank you. Come in and sit down. I'm glad to see you, Mr. Johnson. You are? Well, that doesn't happen very frequently. You comfortable? Oh, yes, yes. Well, I'll have a cigarette. Let me get you a drink. All right. Thank you. What can I do for you, Mr. Johnson? Here's your drink. Oh, thank you. Mr. Arden, have you received any communication from your first wife, Ellen Wagstaff, Arden? Well, I... What are you driving at? Well, our district manager, Mr. Pusey, claims to have a report that a woman answering the general description of your first wife was rescued by a Portuguese freighter, as was also a man named Stephen Burkett, who was reported drowned at the same time. A man named who was picked up with whom? Would you mind saying that again? Oh, don't let yourself get upset about it. If you knew Mr. Pusey like the rest of us... Did you say a man named Stephen Burkett was rescued at the same time as my wife? Well, according to this completely unverified rumor, they were on that island for seven years together. What? What? That's the rumor. Ridiculous, isn't it? What else did you... You're Mr. Pusey here. Well, not very much, really. He talked to someone who had talked to a Portuguese captain. He says the woman called the man Adam. Adam? Adam. That's right. Adam and Eve. Adam and Eve. Isn't that a delightful fancy? Just delightful. You ought to be very grateful that it is only a fancy, because aside from the money involved, could you imagine the pickle you'd be in, if it were? Adam and Eve, huh? Of course, even if it were true, that angle wouldn't bother you. It's easy to see you're not a jealous man, Mr. Art. But you're mistaken, Mr. Johnson. I'm a very jealous man. I guess it's a look at you. Well, Mr. Arden, since you have no news for me, I really must be running along. Good night, Mr. Arden. Good night, Mr. Johnson. Don't you know it isn't polite to bang doors? How can a lady get any sleep? Why didn't you tell me you weren't alone on that island? You didn't ask me. Why do you so dissemble and deceive? I just had a session with the insurance investigator. How am I going to look when this story comes out? My wife and that man alone on an island for seven years. Well, we didn't arrange it, Nick. It just happened. How better did? Why didn't you tell me about him? Because I knew you'd carry on exactly the way you're carrying on now. That's no excuse. I wanted to pick the right time to tell you. There never will be a right time. Seven years. Seven years. Oh, get that look out of your eye. The poor fellow broke his leg trying to drag our boat through the surf. He was laid out for six months. Yeah. Well, that still leaves six and a half years. You know, Nick, Arden, that it just occurs to me that I ought to feel insulted. I go through seven years of agony. I come home to find my husband in the arms of another woman, married. And all my husband can think about is did I carry on with some poor man who wouldn't hurt a fly? Now, just a moment. Now, stop right there. You just a moment yourself. Did you tell her? Did I huh? Huh? Did you? Well, I was about to tell her when the insurance investigator came. How long does it take to tell a woman my wife's come back? Look, I can say it in two seconds. My wife's come back. You've had two days. Oh, Nick. No, no, don't you start yowling too. You just don't want to tell her. That's why you're picking on poor Adam. Any excuse will do. Where is he now? Who? You know who I'm talking about. Oh, Adam? Yes, Adam, poor Adam. Poor, gentle, harmless Adam. He lives at the YMCA. You live at the YMCA? He always lives at the YMCA. He's a clean, living, upright, 100% American and a gentleman. Is there anything more you'd like to know? Yes. When do I meet him? When do you tell her? I don't like your attitude. I don't like your attitude about this whole thing. Good night, Ellen. Good night, Nick. For heaven's sake, you now, Bianca, you're worse than a bloodhound. I'm going to YMCA. Good night. In just a moment, act two of my favorite wife, starring Victor Jory. Friends, a neglected head cold can make you feel pretty miserable. Sniffles, sneezes, your head all stuffed up. Well, I want to tell you of a simple way to quickly relieve such head cold distress. All you do is put a few drops of Vic's Vatronol in each nostril. It's really remarkable how a little of this specialized medication brings grand relief in short order. Instantly, Vatronol starts to work right where trouble is to soothe sniffly, sneezey irritation and help clear stuffiness. And because it makes breathing easier by reducing nasal congestion, many people find Vatronol especially beneficial at night when a head cold often makes breathing so difficult it's hard to get to sleep. So for head cold distress, friends, try Vatronol. You like the way it brings such prompt relief. You'll learn why thousands of people always keep a bottle of Vatronol handy, ready for instant use when a head cold strikes. Follow directions in the package. Vic's Vatronol Nose Drop. The curtain rises on the second act that Vic's Metinee Theater starring Victor Jury in My Favorite Wife. As our scene opens, it's the following morning in Nick Arden's office. Ms. Ross? Yes, sir. I want you to find a Stephen Burkett. Drop everything else. It's very important. I've called all the hotels and you try the country clubs, the men's clubs. The athletic clubs, the YMCA? Not the YMCA. I spent the night there. I never heard of him. I'll get right to work on it, Mr. Arden. Found him, Mr. Arden. I found him. You did? Good. I happened to go to the Pacific Club for lunch. Yes. We had a table right by the windows that opened out on the swimming pool, and someone pointed them out to me. Pointed them out to you, huh? Pretty old duffer, isn't he? Sort of a Casper milk toast? An old duffer? I should say not. In a bathing suit, he's a combination of Johnny Weissmiller, Ronald Coleman, and Cary Grant. If you know what I mean. I know what you mean. Get my house on the phone. Ask my mother to have Ellen meet me at the Pacific Club for dinner. Yes, sir. Right away, sir. Do you want a table by the pool? By the pool? Why not? By all means, a table by the pool. This is a beautiful club, Nick. It's new, isn't it? Yes, it is. How nice to have the tables looking on the swimming pool. Don't you think they'd light it up or something? I guess nobody swims at night. Nick, why did you get a table for three? I'm expecting a guest. You'll be here any moment. I don't quite like the glint in your eye. Eve, darling. Oh, Stephen. How do you do, Mr. Birket? I'm Mr. Arden. How do you do, Arden? Sit down. Sit down. We were waiting for you. You look wonderful, Eve, but you look better on the island. Well, you must admit the closer an improvement. What? Well, after all, I didn't have many changes. You did? May I take your order, please? You know, what would you have, Mr. Birket, a raw steak? No, no, no. Never touch it. I'm strictly a vegetarian. Bring me a glass of carrot juice, a milkshake and some raw carrot. Two steaks and anything that goes with them. Yes, sir. You hear what they're playing. Mm-hmm. Music, isn't it? Yeah. The name of it, Ellen, is South Sea Island Magic. Isn't it a coincidence that they should play that, too? Yeah. A dark, gone, funny one. What do you think, Eve? Nick is married again. What? Why, that's wonderful. That makes everything perfect. Congratulations, old boy. Now I can tell you that I'd like to marry Eve. Oh, you would, would you? Nick, people are looking at us. You think you're gonna marry her? You're full of carrots. You're not allowed to have two wives, you know. How long were you married to Ellen before the island? Four years. What's it to you? Well, I was with her for seven, so I claim her on the basis of seniority. Got you there. You've got me. You've got nothing but a lot of... If you, gentlemen, will excuse me, I think maybe you could settle this thing better without me. Ellen! Don't get up. It might surprise you to know that I can get along very well without either one of you. I'm perfectly able to take care of myself. Ellen, not that way. That's the way to the swimming pool. Ellen! Come on, it's dark out there. She's too mad to see where she's going. She won't even know the pool's there. She knows it's there now. Coming, Eve! Coming! You wait here in the car, Carrots, Birkett, while I go in and... while I go in and get her some clothes. Now really, wasn't it a little ridiculous making me come along? I could have stayed and had a nice visit with Ellen while you got her clothes. You've had enough visiting with Ellen. You have a suspicious nature, old boy. You want to watch that? I'll take care of my nature and you take care of yours. I'll be right back. Hello, Bianca. I can't stop just now. I've got a friend who fell in the swimming pool. I've got to get some clothes for him. But, Nick, I have to talk to you. After all, you should show me some consideration. I will, Bianca. A little later. I have to go upstairs and get the clothes. I'll go with you. Nick, I called our family doctor about us. He says there are hundreds of similar cases. Not like this one. All I can say is you'll certainly make me feel like a failure as a wife. And I haven't even had the chance to fail. Well, let's see. There ought to be something in here. Yeah, here's one. Nick, Nick, that's a dress you're taking. I told you it was for a friend of mine. He's waiting downstairs. Well, let's see now. Hat, coat, dress, shoes. I guess that's... See you later, Bianca. Nick, you weren't even listening to me. Sorry. I will some other time, Bianca. Oh, Nick. Look here, Bianca. I wish you wouldn't follow me up and downstairs. It makes me nervous. What do you want? Can a man come into his own home without being spied on? I'm only trying to help you, dear. Wouldn't you like to lie down for a while? Are you crazy, Bianca? Well, the doctor said you need rest. I don't need rest. I need a little peace. Well, what's wrong with you? There's nothing wrong with me. I'm trying to tell you, Bianca. I'm married. Of course you are, dear. Look, my wife's not dead. She didn't drown the shipwreck. She fell in the pool tonight. I'm getting her some clothes. Now, that's carrot honking. I've got to go. Nick, Nick, wait. Wait. What did you say? Oh, goodness, isn't it clear to you do I have to draw you a diagram? Listen, she came to the hotel. You remember the honeymoon. Darling, you do need a rest. Now, who's that? Mr. Rodden? Good heavens. A policeman. Now, what do you want? Are you Nicholas Rodden? Yes. I got a warrant for your arrest. A rest? A rest. You can't arrest me. What's the charge? Bigamy. Bigamy? Yeah, bigamy. Ha-ha. Now do you believe me? I can't hear myself think. If your honor, please. I don't know what you're doing in my court, Mr. Rodden. In the first place, bigamy is a criminal offense. All you people are cluttering up this court and you don't belong here. Yes, I know your honor, but I'm out on bail. What kind of a lawyer are you? Where did you go to school? Ah, Harvard. Uh-huh. I'm a Yale man myself. Are you the bride? Yes, your honor. Kiss-less? Yes, your honor. Ah-ah-ah. Harvard man. Well, let me see who's here. Nicholas Rodden, Bianca Rodden, Ellen Wagstaff Rodden. Yes. Well, I've looked over the papers in your case, Mr. Rodden. I see nothing wrong with my decision. The evidence is all here. What do you want me to do? Reverse myself? Well, yes, in a manner of speaking. Then you go to the court of appeals. They're always reversing me anyway. This is your decision, your honor. You declared my wife Ellen legally dead in this very courtroom. Your decision is on file. Well, I'm going to declare her legally alive. You can't do that, your honor. If she's legally alive, I'm guilty of bigamy. Besides, if she's legally dead, she can't marry Burkett. Burkett? Burkett? Who's Burkett? What does he have to do with this case? Well, he was on an island with her, your honor. He's not important to the case. I'll decide what's important to the case. What island? The island where my wife stayed for seven years. Seven years, eh? Alone? Is that in the brief? No, your honor. Oh, that should be in the brief. That's the most interesting part of the case. Wait until my wife hears about this. I think so. My cases are dull. Yes, yes. Well, it seems to me the thing for me to do is to annul the second marriage. Your honor, I just want to tell you what this man's done to me from the moment he first married me. Now, never mind that. He is the most nasty, double-crossing, unreliable, deceiving. Quiet, quiet. Concerning, lying, ill-tempered, low-down, mangy. No good here for now. Skunk. That has ever made my misfortune to marry. Quiet. That will cost you ten dollars. He used ten dollars and it was worth it. And as far as I'm concerned, Nick Orton. Quick-tempered woman. Have to watch out for her kind. Well, now that I have a pretty clear idea of the picture, this is our procedure. We file an annulment and we declare Ellen Wagstaff ardent illegally alive, and we adjourn for the day. Wait a minute. What about the marriage? What marriage? Ellen and I, we want to get married. You are married. Didn't I just tell you? What do you want to do? Make it as hard as you can for me? We annul the second marriage and the first one stands. Is that all right with everybody? All right with me. Well, I don't know whether it's all right with me or not. It seems to me I'm being pushed around quite a lot here. Young woman, I am considered a very patient man, but the case of ardent versus clutter ardent versus Wagstaff ardent has me completely at the end of my patience. Now, either you take him in hand or I'm going to commit him to an institution. He's a very confusing man to let run around loose. Ha ha, the judge. He's so cute when he's confused. And he likes to collect wives, you know, the way some people collect stands. I do not. Man can get a lot of trouble collecting wives. Man can get into a lot of trouble with one just like her. Ha ha, go on. You know I'm your favorite wife. Look, will you two go home so I can close court? I'm not as young as I used to be. I get tired about this time of day. Go ahead, kiss and make up so I can close a court in peace. It's going to be all right, isn't it, Ellen? No more Birket? No more Bianca? No more. Okay, Mr. Rodden, from now on, just Ellen and Nick. Sweetheart, my dearest, my dearest. I've been waiting so long for that. And I've been waiting so long for you. Court's adjourned. Let's go home. Darling. Court's adjourned. Let's go home. Darling. Dear. Oh, please, folks, court's adjourned. Let's go home. In just a moment, Victor Jory will tell you about next week's production at Vic's Madonnet Theater. Friends, remember the epidemic of colds that started about this time last year? Well, to be sure, it may not happen again this year, but, nevertheless, this is the time to watch out for colds. Do all you can to guard against infection. Avoid people who have colds. Get plenty of rest and sleep. And if you suddenly start snippling and sneezing, just put a few drops of Vic's Vatronol in each nostril. Vatronol is a specialized medication. A double-duty nose drop that quickly goes to work right where most colds start. It not only relieves the sneeze-y irritation and stuffiness, but actually helps prevent many colds from developing, if used in time. Just try it, friends. And always keep a bottle of Vatronol handy, ready to use at the first sign of a head cold. Follow the simple directions in the package. Vic's Vatronol Nose Drops. This is Victor Jory. We have received numerous requests for such places. Love Affair, Scala Pimpano, Penny Serenade, Rebecca, Jane Eyre and others. It is our desire to bring these and other fine plays to you as soon as possible. What would you like to hear? Write Me and Care of Vic's Matinee Theater, Columbia Broadcasting, 22, New York. Next week's request play will be based on Martha Cheever's great story, Penny Serenade. It's the story of two people who found each other at a moment when it seemed that life had torn them irrevocably apart. It is a heartwarming and beautiful tale, and I know you won't want to miss it. Our play was written by Gene Holloway from the Leo McCary RKO production and was directed by Richard Sandbell. RKO is currently showing the stirring and revealing picture against Naziism, the master race at your local theater. Music for this series is under the direction of Mark Warner. Be sure to listen next week when the Vic's Matinee Theater presents Penny Serenade, starring Victor Jory. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System.