 This is a video about Spider-Man Funko Pops. I know, I know, Funko Pop bad, they stink, they smell, whatever, I don't want to hear it. I'm low on content ideas, and this one has been rattling around in my head for a while. One of my favorite things about Spider-Man Funko Pops is probably just the massive amount of them. I love the multiple looks Spider-Man has had over the years, and there's a Funko Pop for almost every single one. Super obscure Spider-Man villain, Webman? He got a Funko Pop, it got announced like two days ago. That ugly live streaming suit, it also has a Funko Pop, but with red eyes for some reason. Point is, there are a lot of Spider-Man Funko Pops out there in the wild, and since I have so many of them, I figure that it'd be a waste of all of my money that I've spent on these plastic posers if I didn't make a video on them. So let's take a look at Funko's first attempt at Spider-Man. Huh. Uh, this kind of sucks, but only a little bit. I think for the most part, the bobble head actually comes off as a bit charming, with its round, spidey eyes and goofy emblems, but like, why did they go for the darkest and most shitty shade of red possible? Like, come on! This Funko is so close to being perfect, but over 50% of the damn thing is covered in this shitty brownish red. But then they'll turn around and add this little fucker into their little animations and act like they didn't give him this shitty doodoo brown red color, but instead this much more saturated shade of red. That's horse shit. Stick to your guns, dammit. Yeah, but I mean, at least Funko didn't call it quits after one classic Spider-Man Funko pop, because nowadays they just shit out thousands of new and slightly different from the last classic Spider-Man. My favorite. I meant that, by the way. I wasn't being sarcastic. Speaking of classic Spider-Man, it was really nice to finally be able to see some Spider-Man Noe home merch, after it being a bit over a year since the movie came out. Like, goddamn. Like, you guys didn't have to fucking hide these fucking Toby and Andrew pops until recently, dude. Like, everyone knew they were in the damn movie anyway. I don't know why you guys waited so fucking long to release these. You guys are stupid. I'm not really much of a Funko Pop collector, believe it or not. I just usually tend to pick up any cool ones I see when I'm out and about, unless it's something really cool, which is the case when it comes to these Noe home pops. Like, come on. You're telling me you don't want a Toby McGuire Funko Pop? How long has it been since this man has been on anything? This Andrew Pop is pretty cool, too. I noticed they made a much less of an eyesore as compared to the last time they tried to make a Tasm 2 Funko Pop. Like, good god, what were they thinking when they made these eyes? Like, they very easily could have colored them in all white. And you can tell that they very easily could have because there's a small rim on the edge. I'll do a little edit for you to show you what that'd look like. I mean, other than that though, I actually don't mind the body of the figure. I actually really like how wide the Spider logo is on the body. And call me crazy, I kinda wish the logo was this wide on the real Tasm 2 suit. Nonetheless, the Tasm 2 suit is still a really good suit, and this Funko Pop is still outdone in almost every way by the new one. It's more accurate. He's got those big eyes Tasm 2 Spider-Man is known for. It's pretty good. You know, they actually made a Funko Pop for Tasm 1, too. I actually used to have this one, but I had it when I was a little kid, so I didn't actually realize the worth of keeping one of these in good condition. And on top of that, I fucking lost it. Fuck you 10-year-old PSM, I hate you. I hate you! Anyway, issues that need therapy aside, this is actually a really dope pop. I actually don't mind them using the same technique for the lenses that they used for the Tasm Pop after this. Since the rims of the lenses are much smaller, it actually makes it look much more natural. Although I will say, the lenses on this pop are inaccurate since they used a black rim instead of the blue one present in the movie. But I won't hold it against Funko since I actually think the black rims look better here instead of the blue ones from the movie. Not that the blue ones in the movie don't actually look good. I just prefer them black specifically on the Funko Pop. Anyway, moving on to other movie Spider-Man based pop figures, I want to talk about something that for once isn't directly related to Spider-Man. Why the fuck do all these side characters get pops? I assume it's because Marvel or whoever decides who has to get a Funko Pop has to pick a certain amount, which is decided by somebody at Funko or Marvel. So if there's gonna be 10 new Spider-Man movie pops, you're gonna get a net or two. I think one of the most egregious examples of this is Spider-Man fart from home. For some reason we got Funko Pops of the fire elemental and the water elemental from No Way Home and the glow in the dark versions of them on top of that. I refuse to address these fucking fake ass characters as their comic counterparts. I don't give a fuck if you call him Molten Man, this is not Molten Man. Who the fuck is buying these? Like no wonder Funko is fixing to dump their inventory in the landfill. It's because they keep making these stupid fucking Funko Pops no one is going to buy. No one is gonna buy these! I used to see these Funko Pops at stores, unbought, all the way up until the release of No Way Home. Not to mention how fucking wasteful it is to not donate these pops to hospitals or toy drives instead. No, we gotta dump this shit in the garbage instead of giving them to needy kids who could use them and fuck our planet even harder. And yes, we are fucking the shit out of our planet. This company will go bankrupt by the time I turn 40. These fuckers don't even know how to do capitalism right. It's so easy! Just be as evil as possible and make smart choices. Let's talk about some new Funko Pops. Across the spider versus coming soon, and the pops that are coming out for this movie are amazing. There are so many I'm going to mention coming up, and they're all spider people this time. So at least people will actually come through and buy these instead of leaving them out to dry like all those other Funko Pops Funko shouldn't have made. Spider-Man 2099 gets two pops, and honestly, he looks better here than he has in any other Funko Pop that I've ever seen made for this character. I've always found Spider-Man 2099's other pops to look kinda odd. The first one they made doesn't look too bad, I'm just not in love with the design of it. Also, it doesn't have a cape, so... Automatic 0 out of 10, bro. No cape. No cape! Damn it, bro, get out! Their second Spider-Man 2099 Pop is undeniably much better. Although I do find the eyes to be a bit close together, everything about it is actually really nice, but I do end up missing the colors of the old one. 8 out of 10. These lenses have been formed to fit the shape of the Funko Pop so well, and I love both of the different figure poses they gave to Miguel. The colors are great, the pop looks amazing, 10 out of 10, I will be participating in capitalism and buying one of these. Hopefully if I get enough, Funko's stock will rise again. Next up is Spider-Punk. I don't remember most of what I said about Spider-Punk's design in my Spiderverse video, but I do remember thinking that Spider-Punk's skin was actually visible in his design, but as you can see, very clearly it is not, and instead he's wearing a red spandex suit under all of his clothes. I'll have to wait to see how he looks in the movie, but... for now, this is a perfect 10 out of 10 pop. I love giving the stupid greedy mega corporation money. Yes, sir. Scarlet Spider is getting another Funko Pop, and I'm glad to see that this one is actually making use of the comic shading style that Ben was actually frequently colored with. It looks like this time Funko actually put a bit of a thought in painting this. If you compare the Scarlet Spider to the first one Funko made, it's really no contest. This one is definitely good, but it's outclassed in almost every single way by the across the Spiderverse one. There's definitely more Spiderverse pops I could talk about, but I didn't really think I'd be saying anything worthwhile about them, so I figured I wouldn't. Alright, it's been a while since I've complained about some stupid shit, so I'm gonna start now. These are eight classic Spider-Man Funko pops, and three of them have something I dislike about them. To the untrained and unautistic eye, these look like perfectly fine Spider-Man Funko pops, but no, three out of eight of these have these shitty ass back logos on them. I know it's a nitpick, so save your angry comment. I literally just told you that even I know what I'm complaining about is stupid, so just save it, dude. Take it out on your drywall or something. I hate this Spider logo. I've always found it really unappealing. It's too geometrical, and it does not at all work as a Spider logo. On its own, it's just really unsatisfying. Its legs are bent at a 90-degree angle, preventing the legs from stretching out across Spidey's back, which usually tends to make back logos much more appealing. For example, the Funko pop of the Japanese Spider-Man back logo looks so much more appealing, as it takes up much more space and stretches out across his back. The legs lack form with one another, and all of them stretch out slightly farther, more than the last, and it just makes it look worse. The main problem with this logo is just the really ugly legs. They're too blocky. They're too blocky, and they lack motion. They feel so stiff and lifeless. I hate that they continue to use this back logo when they have access to so much better ones, too. I mean, look at them. Even the first Spider-Man Funko pop had a better back logo. Dear Marvel, I hate this. Please stop using it. Love, PSM. And that's all I really have to say about Spider-Man Funko pops. I could talk about how lame it is that there was that one era where they would just reuse the MCU lenses over and over again for a couple of Spidey pops, but it seems like they've changed their ways since then and started making new lenses for their Spidey pops, so, good on them. I hope you guys don't crash, or maybe you should, because it'd be one less megacorporation in the world, less child slaves painting figurines for people who have sworn off having sex. Well, except for you, Zach. Anyway, see you next time with the Spider-Man Cosplay Tutorial. Bye-bye. I... You know what? I'm gonna dedicate the entire fucking... I've been going on such a, like, anti-fucking capitalist rant this entire time, but I'm gonna spend the entire end card talking about how stupid it is that Funko is fucking dumping their shit into fucking landfills. Look, I know it is the cheaper option to just dump your shit into landfills to fucking... to get rid of inventory. Alright, fine. I understand it makes sense, but at the same fucking time, I feel like it would be good PR and it might raise the stock a little bit if Funko goes on this fucking... on this big ass fucking mission to donate all these fucking useless ass pops that they shouldn't have even been making in the first place to fucking needy kids or some shit. Like, I can't be the only one who thinks this is a good idea. Like, it's so stupid. It is so fucking stupid that once again, corporate greed is fucking over the planet and the landfills and we're doing stupid, useless, and just wasting money and materials and resources instead of fucking putting that shit into places where it could be used for the good of mankind. Why the fuck are we doing this? Why? Like, I... I don't know, it just fucking bothers me. I feel so hopeless in this fucking... I've been feeling really hopeless lately in America. I just see so much stupid shit going on all the damn time. And like, I don't know, I'm venting about this in a Funko Pop video. I'm venting about this in the end card of a Funko Pop video. Jesus Christ. Anyway, if any of my fans accidentally fucking become massive millionaires with massive millionaire companies, I don't know. Just fucking... I don't know, remember this fucking character you used to idolize, man? This Spider-Man character. And remember that like, there's a good out there that can be done. And damn well, he taught you that shit. Whatever. It's dumb, it's dumb. But what's even dumber is dumping these fucking toys into landfills instead of fucking giving them to needy kids or... I hate you. Anyway, this is the end of the video. Please come back next week for a less unhinged madness. I think I'll be less unhinged in the next video. Thank you. Bye.