 Hey there friends! How's it going? My name is Kevin. I apologize for the double intro again, but I just wanted to quickly let you know we have a new poster on the merch store, which I think is pretty frickin' cool. It shows how it's been all along, the puppet master here in control of his puppet. Yeah, I think you kind of knew, didn't you? It's pretty glossy with all my lights, so I'll show you a quick little graphic, but I think it looks really cool. If you're interested, there'll be a link in the description to check them out. I hope you like it, and without further ado, on with the video. Hey there friends! How's it going? My name is Kevin, and today we're going to do something a little bit different. Because of this whole lockdown and quarantine situation, I've noticed that a lot of people are starting out doing videos and streams and all that, and really, I'm not very good at what I do, so it's only a matter of time they get my job, or it gets automated away. Oh, Mayor Burner. Well, best friends, fuck you! You see, I'm really not essential, so what I think I should do is try to gain skills in other areas, so when this lockdown thing ends, I can enter the real workforce if I'm forced to. Work forced. Work forced. Okay, yeah. There's something there, but I'm just not smart enough to make a joke out of it. So what I've found is a bartender VR game, which looks way over complicated, like way more complicated than it needs to be. It looks like it's almost like, I'll train you to be a bartender rather than like a fun quirky game, so you know what's going to be good. All right, well, we're going to try our luck, so without further ado, may I take your order? Okay, here we are. Now, what's up first? Okay, the rooftop bar is locked. Probably better off. I'm afraid of heights. Now we have pro mode. Single drink. That sounds right for me. I always drink alone. All right, I guess we have to start the tutorial then. All right, show me how it's done. I'm ready for a job in the real world. Don't put the drink on the napkin. Is that it? It's just showing me a video. I learned by doing things, which is why I'm not good at anything, because I don't do anything with my life. But seriously, this isn't going to help me. I don't do well with videos, reading, or most things. You earn points for making the drinks. All right, flip shit. Great. That's all I needed to know. I'm in practice. Free. What do I do? All right, let's get flipping. Whoa, you like that? Oh, that wasn't the drink. I pissed myself. Sorry, it's my first day. Sorry about that. I'll have in my notice. All right, let's have an Irish style drink. First, you get the bottle, then you put a straw inside. Racism. No Irish drinks? What is this? Trying to eat the oranges and limes and stuff? I haven't eaten in a month. Okay, what drink do you actually want me to do? Place a napkin. Okay, I can do that much. I think we're the napkins. Anyone see the napkins? Who believe? What? What was that? Failure. Equipment destroyed. I tried to throw a bottle at someone. Okay, seriously, where is it? Oh, is this it? Oh, okay, there we go. Nice. What's next? Take a long glass and fill it with ice cubes. Okay, I could do with someone showing me around to be honest with you. This? Oh, God, that's my wall. Failure. Anything but a finished drink cannot be placed on. Perfect sake, back off. All right, napkin. A glass. Shit. A second glass. Shit. Perfect sake. I'm never going to get this single drink done. This one guy is waiting on his order like, come on, come on. Oh, look at that. Yeah, that's, oh, that's actually a lot. I thought it was one. Oh, I think I could be a professional bartender. It's done. Just ice. Wait. Okay, it still thinks it's done. 40 mil of white rum. There we go. Yeah, there we go. Absolutely perfect. 100 mil of cola. Well, I know that's right behind me. Um, okay. Should have known that wouldn't work. There we go. I only have two hands here. Oh, that was effective. Yep. Almost all of it's making it into the glass. Add one lime. Add one lime. Oh, that was a practice lime. Serve the drink. Voila. There's no ice. The straw wasn't even reaching the liquid. Americano. Okay, one coffee coming up. I'm going to get fired. All right, we're going to speed around this one. Come on. Come on, get in there. Come on. Go on. Go in. Go in. The bottle's broken. Okay, now it's working. What? How is that a fail? I feel like I should be making small talk while I'm doing this. Like, I'm a good bartender, but since they're not close, it's not really small talk. It's big talk. Hey, you got me! I don't think you'll ever come here again. It's filled with ice cubes. Apparently, the green is surrounded, so that means it's full. All right, I don't think that's working. I think that's where we went wrong last time. Tell me it's full. Come on. It's full. Starting again. Oh, I've missed VR so much. I've not played games like this in a long time, and they're just so much fun. I know it's backwards for them, but I'm not smart or fast enough to write this the right way for them. All right, let's go. The bitter. The bitter truth is I freaking suck at this. Bitter. That's what it says. Okay, ice. Now, bitter and sweet caramel. Okay, this one, I mean, don't have them all saying the same thing. 80 mils of soda. Oh, no. Which one of you is soda? Okay. See, they couldn't get the license for any actual soda, so we're going with store-brand soda. Is that cool? That I can have a rum and coke? No, but you can have a rum and soda unbranded. We tear the labels off. Sorry, I have fun here while I work. All right, that's a bit too much soda, but you know what? You seem like a lightweight anyway. Wait, that's it. It says 80 mils. Is it done? I don't understand. I hate my job. You know, it's people like me that are causing every job to be automated away. At least I'm keeping the Eskimos in business. I'm using a lot of ice. Like, the instructions just don't come up sometimes. Okay, I'm winging it. I know what I'm doing. Bitter's next. All right, where's the unbranded soda? There we go. Rip the fucking thing off the hinges. Like, is this done? Can you tell me please? All right, you know what? Oh, for fuck's sake. I was just going to say let me just serve it, but I dropped the bottle. I'm used to being destructive. I'm lighting the audience on fire. I can't even say I dropped it. Honestly, I threw it. Okay, there's a bit of an orange zest there in the top. Okay, let me try it once more. What? What did I do wrong now? Wrong ice cube. They're all the fucking same. I always just have it in my hand. It's very risky the way I move around. I should probably just place it down on the counter. Okay, orange zest. Over, porno. Shut up. Shut up. Add a straw. Voila. Hey, it's done. Oh, this looks complicated. Can I go serve at a different bar? I hate this place. Open it with my teeth. Come on. God damn it. How do I open this thing? This, like, this isn't going to work, is it? All right, put this down a moment. Oh, yeah, it's open. Add two dashes of bitters. Oh, for fuck's sake. I don't know which it is. What's a dash? Add a lime. Add a straw. You can't drink your alcohol with a little straw. Okay, are we good? Yes, I did it on my first try. I'm ready for another bar. I think I should get promoted. I don't really understand what the menu is and what I have to do. Like, it just keeps putting me back in here with this stupid looping music. Oh, sorry. I guess I'm not that sorry since I'm continuing to do it. I was just curious how it looked. I think I'm going to need this if I'm going to continue with this job. I don't mean getting drunk. I mean pouring it right into my eye so I have to go to the hospital and get sick leave. Okay, this one's a free pour. I get to make my own drink, which is great. Or is it one ice cube? It's very specific because I don't want to water it down. There we go. It became a lot bigger in the glass somehow. Where's the vodka? There we go. Here's my kind of drink. All right, 200 mils of vodka and where's our unbranded soda? There we go. And the mixer. There we go. Why is this not working? What is wrong with this glass? I don't understand. Is it because I don't have ice in it? Is that it? Oh, it was. Yeah, minty. I don't know what to call it. I think I'll call it alcohol poisoning. Your own drink. Interesting. Am I able to go over here? I'm kind of afraid. I didn't realize it was such an open world game. What is the menu? What is wrong with it? I'm trying to just figure out how to actually go on the other levels. Sex on the beach. No, thank you. I don't like sand. It's rough and coarse and it gets everywhere. The menu is like doubling up on itself. I don't know what's happening. Like, what does that say? I hate being a bartender. Have fun. Okay, he's clapping for his own tutorial even though it's fucking didn't help me at all. I guess I'll go back to the other level. Like, the first level is locked. Practice is open, but that's it. I'm trying to hit it close my butt and be like a quirky bartender. I'm so glad I didn't use my webcam for this video. What? Oh, I was just fixing my VR. I was fixing my headset after doing that weird twerk to close the door and it spilled out over my shoulder. Okay. Why is it so hard? They're so unforgiving. It's like ice on the floor. You're fired. What? I forgot the napkin. Apologies, okay? Your drink's ruined. I understand. All right, I think I just need a bit more flair like when I'm doing it, you know? I just need to be slick and confident with it even though I just over poured by about 10 mil there. See that? You know I know what I'm doing now. I'm getting affected everywhere except in the glass. I'll flip the lime into it too. Flip the lime into it. Okay, there we go. Add a straw. Add a straw and you're done. Thanks for taking money off me as a tip. I appreciate it. What the shit was that? Okay, speedrun this time. Come on. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Okay, none of this is going into the glass. 31 mils. Okay, and this. Whoop. 30 mils of this and then I'm gonna need soda. So speedrun. Speedrun. Jesus, it's just to fight gravity. Okay, and one of these and a straw and you're done. There you go. Thank you for giving me back 30 cents of the 31 that was stolen from me. That is way too much. They wanted 40 mil. I gave them 51. Look, you're getting good value. Come on. Why would you say no to that? You fucking Moscow mule yourself. Are you serious? They get so pissed if you don't place the napkin. They're so touchy. Why are you saying failure? It's still going on. I don't care. I'm gonna ignore it. What? It was the right one. He said ginger beer. That is ginger beer. 100 mil of ginger beer. Ginger beer. Okay. So we're gonna crack it open. We're gonna give you your ginger beer. All right, you happy with that? Even though it's the exact same as last? No, you're fucking not. All right, fuck off. I quit. I'm out chief. See ya. No bartender life now. I didn't want to be a bartender anyway. No, I don't think real world is for me. So I'm hoping that I can keep my job because really it's all I have. But I really hope you enjoyed the video. I enjoyed this one. It was fun to jump back into VR. It's been a while, but yeah, I won't ramble too much, especially since my phone is gone off. Apologies about that. Very unprofessional. You see, this is why I'm gonna lose my job. But I do hope you enjoyed. I appreciate you watching as always. I hope you're staying safe in these weird times and I hope to see you next time. Bye for now.