 Um, look at, we've got a guy in the house. Seth. Good. I'm not echoing Emma. No, you're fine. Look at the camera. Don't look at me. Okay. Okay. Very good. Yes. I got it. Okay. How are you, Jonathan? You know who I am, right? Oh, I've seen you on some of my videos, but I don't know you have a boyfriend. Zimbabwe dead. Really quickly for everybody watching this. Um, one of the women in my private group called midlife love mastery has met a man who lives in a nut. She lives in Zimbabwe. Seth lives in, I believe South Carolina. They connected through a dating app. I don't believe the two of you have met yet. Is that right? No, we have. I actually flew to Zimbabwe 10,000 miles and spent a little over a week with her. Yep. Okay. It was fantastic, fantastic week. And she's actually coming to the States. We're trying to get that put together. So, okay. So you're literally, you remind, this reminds me of the TV show 90 day fiance, which is people from other countries. So, but by the way, is she an American or she is Zimbabwe? She's born and raised in Bulaway Zimbabwe. Yes. Okay. Okay. Even though she's a white chick. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Okay. So, are you willing to, are you willing to allow me to be her heart protector and a big brother for a moment? That's why I permission to grill you right now. They don't call it the hot seat for nothing, right? Okay. So, as you know, I'm a heart protector for women. Right. In the sense that I'm their big brother. I have a shotgun pointed at you right now. If I literally could be, I'd be, what's your intentions? Yeah. Obviously, the two of you have hit it off. You've spent, tell me you've spent a significant amount of time in FaceTime communicating with one another. Is that right? That is correct. Yeah. Can you expand upon that for a little bit? So, we talk every day during, so there's a seven hour time difference. So, unfortunately, we can't just talk whenever. I talk during my lunch break during the weekdays. And on the weekends, we can talk, we've talked anywhere. Most weekends, we talk at least three hours. And honestly, we had one weekend where we talked 12 hours over the course of the weekend, which is crazy. But so, we talk a lot. And I think people don't appreciate that enough. You know, I know, I don't believe that at all counts as what did you call it? Long distance bookups or whatever. Well, let me just interject here for a moment. What happens oftentimes is that through this cyber connection, I'm using the term cyber internet connection, we experience as human beings, we experience what's known as artificial intimacy, artificial intimacy. What that means, I suspect the two of you feel a strong connection for one another. Yep. And yet it hasn't been built through the traditional building blocks of social activities, hobbies, mutual interests, spending time with family and friends, traveling together. It hasn't built through variety of different circumstances. Okay. And what also typically happens in long distance dynamics is what I call a bubble experience. You know, you're together, especially when you first meet, if there's sexual tension, you know, because two people have been communicating, they jump in the bed together quickly. And I'm going to ask you that question in a moment. Yes. But what happens is it's a bubble most often. It's not true reality. So, so, I mean, you don't have to answer this question. When you flew out to Zimbabwe, did you guys have sex? We did. I made a joke with, with Deb. I said, a man doesn't kiss and tell unless he's on Jonathan's show. And then he tells everybody. Yes, we did. And that was quite okay. So, so here's the thing about that. But, but you know, but Seth, let me ask you something because I also believe sex is part of our decision making process. In other words, like, look at, let's face it, if the sex sucks, and it can suck for either party. Yeah, I mean, like, you know, like, you take your roll the dice. Yeah. Okay. So she's coming out to South Carolina. When is she coming? She's coming April 20. So she'll be here April 20 to June 15. Okay. So pending on her visa, which we're going to stay confident that's gonna work out. Now, now really quickly. So we're in January here. So that's February, March, April, it's roughly three months away. Two and a half months. Can she just travel just like a tourist? Can she just come over here like any other? It's taking that long to get a tourist visa, just a tourist visa. Where she was going to come into March, but then we got the visa thing going and she couldn't get an appointment with the consulate until April 9. Okay. Yeah. All right. So let's get into the nitty gritty. Why do you like this chick? She's incredible. Okay. So first of all, I love that you're asking. And I do think, of course, the default, I think she's beautiful. I think she's sexy. But the thing is, I love her heart. I think I just, I love, she's a beautiful person in and out. So she's kind. She's thoughtful. She's good. She's generous. She kind of blows, oh, she has a, she has a high capacity for forgiveness. She's had a lot of wrongs in her life. Okay. But she, I'm just stunned sometimes about how she still has connections with people that have wronged her in her life. But she doesn't just, she doesn't just go on and on about horrible they are. She's, you know, so I just really her character. I know that's something you said that I love when you say character, character, you know, real estate is location, location, location and relationships is character, character, character. Yeah. And I want to be that person that has integrity and character and she has that. So okay. So I'm going to jump in. Okay. So how tall is Deb? So she is five, four. Okay. And how tall are you? I'm five, six. By the way, no judgment here. Okay. No, none at all. Yeah. But you know, I'm going to suspect that you've been rejected by a lot of women because of your height. Correct. Yeah. Okay. And you know, and not that you're George Clooney answer, but you're not an unattractive guy. Exactly. Yeah. You're not George Clooney. You're not red. Yeah. So if Deb were here, and by the way, she was on a previous broadcast, which I heard a clip for it. What would she say about your, her physical attractiveness towards you? She says, I'm handsome. And you know, it's funny. I listened to that first show and, you know, where she, and she said, he's not the tall, dark handsome, which I thought was funny. And he has a little extra. I thought that was hilarious. I can laugh at myself. I think that's important. But, but, you know, she said the pictures weren't flattering. And when I got to Zimbabwe, and it's true, I'm not, what's the term when someone looked good in pictures? Catfish. Yeah. Well, the point is she, when I got there, she said, you're a lot more handsome in person than on the pictures. So I was like, okay, that's a win. I'm going to take that. You know, it's funny because there's either, you either get, you're more attractive in your pictures or God, you look, you know, you don't look as good as your pictures. Seth, I've been on both ends of this, you know, I've been on both ends of either A, they weren't attracted to me or I wasn't attracted to them. Certainly, I'm a big proponent as I'm speaking to the entire audience here. I am a huge proponent for every human being. If you're going to put yourself on a dating site is to curate a quality representation of yourself, including quality photographs, quality photographs. Yeah. Okay. Most people have crappy photographs. They're not very well done. And then a really quality essay, because that can weed out people where there's that misalignment. So, so obviously, dude, the fact that you came on here today tells me, you know, and she's indoctrinated you into the Jonathan Asley world. You obviously must be smitten by her. You just rattled off a tremendous amount of qualities that you appreciate her. Yeah. Yeah. Here's my advice. Okay. That's okay. Absolutely. That's why I'm here. You know, when, if and when Dev moves to United States, okay, or you guys spend a significant amount of time together, it's important to do a variety of different things together. Yeah. To learn about each other number one. Yes. Yes. You know, recognizing, but the challenge oftentimes is when somebody moves across the country or to another country is they find themselves that they don't have their own life. Yeah. You have your life in South Carolina and she most likely so it's incumbent upon her. I can't begin to stress this enough to develop some sort of life outside of you because then it puts so much pressure on the relationship. Yes. And by the way, in 90 day fiance, the other way, a woman went from like the Midwest to South Africa. Yeah. And in South Africa where this guy lived, I mean, there's bars on the door because there's not a level of safety there. He feels safe, but she not only didn't feel safe. She didn't have a life for herself. This is the most important thing to have serious dialogue on if this is going to progress any further. Is this helping at all? Yeah, it does. Actually, can I make a comment too? And the way I would describe that is the power dynamic. You know, I told her early and often I said I'm a feminist and I think it's an end. And I don't want to get into all the weeds of that. I'm the kind of I'm not a crazy feminist, but part of me is going like I wonder if women would just say I'm looking for a man that's a feminist to have their problems and go away. But power dynamics, it really means a lot to me. And the power dynamic is so potentially awful. She comes here, she's giving up her. Now she's just coming for a visit for a while, but long-term she'd be here and she's giving up so much. She can't work. I'm supporting her. And I think a lot of men could turn that power dynamic into something awful. And so I have, you mentioned her, but it's also important to me that I actually support her when she's feeling lonely and she's missing her home and make her feel important and all that. And so we talked a lot about that. That is on me to do that. So I just wanted to point that out. By the way, just for everyone watching, I am a feminist as well. And what that means to me is individuals, whether you have a penis or vagina, you be treated, you know, fairly with one another. That's what that means to me. And particularly in relationship, what that means to me is I don't, then again, I'm speaking only for myself, yourself, is I don't believe in the one up, one down dynamic of a relationship that are power controlled where the man is the leader of the relationship and the woman must submit to her man. I just don't believe that. I believe in partnership, very similar to two attorneys who decide to start a law firm together, do CPAs who start a law firm together, to doctors to start a medical practice together. They have equal say in the outcome of the shared dynamic. That to me is feminism. Okay. Right. Absolutely. I just want to address that. Well, listen, Seth, we have a lot of questions coming in from others. I just want to share my appreciation for you coming on. Thank you so much. And I wish you two all the best. Okay. Thank you very much, Jonathan. You have a great day. All right. All right. I love you. Oh, thank you. I appreciate that. Folks, you know, I'm, I'm a big prop, you know, to the extent that I do have criticisms for long distance dating. There was always the exception to the rule. The clock is the broken clock is right twice a day. And it might be that Seth and Deborah or Deb might be able to go the distance. I wish them all the success. It sounds like they're going in very consciously with intentionality, which is a lot different because most people that enter into the long distance dating dynamic, it's all about the good feelings, the good feelings, and they haven't really addressed the mechanics to a healthy, happy relationship. And since Deb has been indoctrinated in the Jonathan Asley philosophy, and she's part of my group called midlife love mastery. There's a link below to join the group. She's operating from a, from a greater sense of awareness. And it sounds like Seth is also in the same space as her. And because of that, they have a greater chance for success. So I, Jonathan, endorse this long distance dating dynamic