 Alright, alright, everybody just calm down. I've been getting a ton of requests to review episode three of Euphoria and I finally sat down and watched it and woohoo there's a lot to unpack from this episode. What is up everybody this is Chris from the Rewired Soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution and if you're new to my channel what I try to do is take different topics from movies, TV shows, the YouTube community and try to see what lessons we can pull from them to improve our own mental and emotional well-being and some things that I'm extremely extremely passionate about our mental health as well as addiction recovery so if you're into any of that stuff make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell and if you haven't met me yet hi I'm Chris I'm a recovering drug addict and alcoholic just a couple weeks ago I celebrated seven years clean and sober much like Zendaya's character Rue my substance of choice was prescription pain killers as well alright so not only have I been sober for about seven years I also worked in a drug and alcohol treatment center where we specialize in mental health as well I'm also a sober coach and I'm also an author so if you didn't get the memo my brand new book Rewire Your Anxiety is out now so make sure you check out the description as well as the pinned comment below the ebooks out the audio books out it's not like a huge book either the audio book I think clocked in at about two hours or so something like that so if you're somebody who drives around or you got a bus ride that you go on boom just listen to it or you can do the ebook on your phone or tablet or whatever you got alright so anyways yeah let's talk about episode three of euphoria I've been focusing on Zendaya's character Rue if you guys want me to do other character breakdowns let me know down in the comments below like there's a lot going on with cat obviously and it seems like euphoria is kind of taking the route of 13 reasons why a little bit where each episode they're kind of like focus more on a specific character and each one's kind of going through their own things so if you want me to do any other character breakdowns let me know down in the comments below alright but anyways yeah Rue let's talk about this so one of the first things obviously is that she lies about her clean time so the first time we see her in the front of a 12-step meeting I giggle about that because not all meetings are like this like rarely any meetings are like this anyways she's lying about her clean time because she just did fentanyl in the last episode right but she has been cleaned for about two weeks but it's common for people to lie about their clean time we call that taking a dirty chip alright and the next thing I want to talk about is when she was laying in bed with Jules and Jules was just saying like how she doesn't you know want Rue to relapse or use drugs anymore because she's been through her own stuff like she's been through enough of that now something what's interesting and you might be able to relate to this is that it's it's not usually a coincidence that people who have been through things are attracted or drawn to people who are currently addicted to drugs or just have a messed up life or whatever it is sometimes it's this savior behavior right so like from my experience I had an alcoholic mom she's been sober for almost 14 years now but growing up my mom was an alcoholic until I was 20 years old and a common thing that I would do was date women who needed you know quote-unquote saving and the psychology behind that is since we couldn't save this person in our life maybe we could save that person so although Jules is saying like she doesn't want to have to worry about Rue and all these other things and she's gonna have to draw this boundary and cut Rue out of her life sometimes like unless we get our own therapy and figure out our own stuff we're going to keep being drawn to those people if you can relate to that let me know down in the comments below and if you've been able to break away from that let me know how you did that down in the comments so in this scene right here where Rue's talking again at the meeting like something that you know a lot of us in recovery have to deal with is getting clean for other people versus getting clean for ourselves and something that I just cannot express enough is other people's love for us is never enough to keep us sober right like I didn't get clean and sober until my son was three years old if other people's love could save me I would have been saved a long time ago but here's the thing like a lot of people in 12-step meetings even in the rehab I worked at they they would say like you have to get sober for yourself you have to get sober for yourself and this is very true but in the beginning especially like it is get sober for whoever keeps you sober that day because here's what I struggled with in early recovery I was struggling with extreme depression and I thought daily about ending my own life because I didn't have substances anymore right so when people would say you have to stay clean for yourself I'm like well I don't like myself I hate myself so why would I stay sober for myself so in early recovery like my biggest suggestion to anybody out there like what helped me was every single day I had to find new motivation to stay sober like some days I was staying sober for my son some days I was staying sober for my family some days I was staying sober for the people in my life who I met in recovery because not only were they helping me stay clean but in turn I was helping them stay clean so it took a while but throughout this recovery journey and when I started putting in the work which we're gonna talk a lot about in a second I started to learn how to love myself and today today but this has been years now I started wanting to stay clean for myself I started waking up each day excited for the day like I stay clean because I want to stay clean regardless of anybody else like something I was taught was one of the things about staying clean for other people is we never know what's gonna happen with other people for example I've seen people come into treatment for their wife right and then they get out of treatment and their wife leaves them and then they relapse you see what I'm saying so that's why it is not really a good idea to always just stay clean for other people like the last thing I'll say on that something I was taught a long time ago was we join what's called the no matter what club we stay clean no matter what like job or no job wife or no wife whatever it is we stay clean no matter what so then there was a scene where Rue relapsed she went to the bathroom at Jules house and she found you know some pills and she ended up snagging some and like as a recovering pill addict I can tell you like that that is so true whenever I was at anybody's house I was always like checking their pills and everything like that but what I want people to take away from this scene was like Rue didn't have a program you know what I mean like she wasn't actively looking on her recover working on her recovery so the second these drugs were in front of her face like she had no defense you see what I mean and like what's important to realize to at this point in the episode things were fine okay because later in the episode she tries to use the excuse that you know everything screwed up so she needs to get high but when she took the pills from Jules house everything was fine then she leaves that and she ends up going to a meeting and here's the thing so like when I was working in treatment like we had rules like there's rules in treatment number one rule don't bring drugs in treatment but what in it anyways there were other rules like not to have your cell phone in groups and things like that and like the clients would always like you know snake their cell phones in their pockets and everything but the problem with us drug addicts and alcoholics is like once we start off small we we just make it bigger and bigger when it comes to our lives right so we lie about something tiny like maybe you're lying about your clean time then it's easier to relapse because you are already lying about your clean time you see what I mean so that's why one of the foundations of staying clean and sober is honesty like we just have to start being honest like something I heard a long time ago which is very true for many of us in recovery is we're only as sick as our secrets right and here's the thing you don't have to dance with everybody like if you do not feel comfortable telling an entire group of people every thing that you've done or you're going through like find once one person you don't got to dance with everybody you got to dance with somebody but but then came out my dude Ali alright so after she leaves that meeting that dude Ali calls her out and he seems like he's got some time and everything like that and he starts getting up in her head and that is one of the reasons why you go to meetings we need other drug addicts and alcoholics to call us out on our crap and the reason why it's so much more beneficial like I remember when like doctors or some of you it might have been therapists when they're trying to tell us about us right and what we've done and all these things and who we've heard like we're like you don't understand you haven't been through what I've been through you don't know what it's like to need this thing right but when another drug addict or alcoholic and recovery is talking to you as some depth and weight and like as soon as I saw him like dropping some truth on her I was like dude I hope she gets this guy as a sponsor now something I will say really quick real quick is typically men stick with men women stick with women okay there are some different times where it's all right to have a male sponsor if you're a female or a female sponsor if you're a male but it's not suggested because usually early in recovery like there's a lot of sexual feelings and we're just trying to find somebody to get our rocks off so people like try to make an excuse like oh I just want I just want that hot chick to be my sponsor because she seems like she has some good recovery and it's like nah man your motives are screwed up right but anyways if you want me to do a more in-depth video on that let me down in the comments below so anyways the most powerful scene in this episode was when Zendaya's character Rue went to Fez to go get some drugs after you know she she had that uncomfortable conversation with Jules and that's part of what recovery is about is talking about your feelings and going through these things right but then she you know kissed Jules and she freaked out she left and she went to Fez to go get drugs and she's banging on the door and Fez said no he's like I'm not gonna help you kill yourself anymore and that's when Rue snapped and I could I could feel it like it reminded me so much of myself right like when we're fiending when we want the drugs we will say the most terrible awful thing to get what we want and like Rue is sitting there screaming at Fez saying that she's gonna hate him until the day she dies and then she starts blaming him for it and thank God Fez stood his ground and set that boundary right because I can relate to that so much when I got sober seven years ago and my family was having an intervention like it is just I still get chills just thinking about it cuz it was just such an awful but great day too because it's what led to my sobriety but my family was there and the whole time I was screaming at my mom I was screaming at my mom in front of my dad and my cousins and I think like my aunt was there too I was yelling at her I'm like this is your fault you're the reason I'm this way right like if you hadn't been an alcoholic for most of my life I wouldn't have become screwed up and now you want to now you want me to get better even though you're the one who caused this right and I'm blaming it all on her right and here's something that all of us have to figure out and like I don't care if you're an addict trying to get clean or stay clean or whatever it is like this is for everybody in our mental health as we move forward and let go of the past like although something in our past might have contributed to the way we are today we can't keep using that as an excuse like who was I who was I to blame my mother for my addiction when I'm in turn doing the same thing to my son you see what I mean like we have to start taking responsibility while somebody might have contributed in the beginning it is now our responsibility to get better like for example like my childhood was traumatic but it's my responsibility to work 12 step programs to go to therapy to meditate to do all these things that is mine nobody has to get better for me I have to get better I have to put in the work all right but anyways like yeah that was a really really powerful scene right there but yeah let me know your thoughts about this episode if there's anything I miss or you want me to dive deeper into or other character breakdowns let me know down in the comments below and by way don't forget we were your anxiety is available now go check it out it is hopefully helping a lot of people I've had some good reviews so far but I really really think there's a lot of practical solutions in there for anybody who struggles with anxiety if you know somebody who struggles with anxiety shoot in the link say yo check this book out this guy's pretty cool alright that's all I got for this video if you like this video please give it a thumbs up if you're new make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton of videos and a huge huge thank you to everybody supporting the channel on patreon you're all amazing and all of you wonderful patrons out there I just put up the links because you all get free copies of rewire anxiety so go check it out all right thanks again so so much for watching I'll see you next time