 The Parable of the Insults There once lived a great warrior. Though quite old, he was still able to defeat any challenger. His reputation extended far and wide throughout the land, and many students gathered to study under him. One day, an infamous young warrior arrived at the village. He was determined to be the first man to defeat the great master. For along with his strength and skill, he had the uncanny ability to spot and exploit any weakness in an opponent. He would wait for his opponent to make his first move, thus revealing a weakness, and then would strike with merciless force at lightning speed. No one had ever lasted in a match against him beyond the first move. Much against the advice of his concerned students, the old master gladly accepted the young warrior's challenge. As the two squared off for battle, the young warrior began to hurl insults at the old master. He threw dirt and spit in his face, and for hours, through every manner of insult, had his opponent known to mankind. But the old warrior simply stood there, motionless and calm. Finally, the young warrior exhausted himself. Knowing he was defeated, he left, feeling shamed. Some would disappoint it that he did not fight the insolent youth. The students gathered around the old master and questioned him. How could you endure such indignity? And how did you drive him away? They asked. If someone gives you a gift and you do not choose to receive it, the master replied, to whom does the gift belong? Although this parable has a different setting, it's fundamentally the same as the old Buddhist tale of the gift, where the great master is actually the Buddha, teaching a lesson, and the young warrior is a bystander who angrily disagrees. Whatever the context, the ultimate lesson and truth remains the same. To answer the master's question here, a gift would still belong to you if the recipient didn't accept it, because, after all, you bought it. The truth of this teaching, however, lies in allegory. See, it's the same with your anger or negative emotions. If you become angry with someone and they don't feel insulted or accept your hostility, the anger falls back on you, as it was initially yours to give. You are then the one who becomes unhappy, not them, and all you've done is hurt yourself. The Buddha often beautifully concludes this tale by saying something along the lines of, just as a mirror reflects an object, as a still lake reflects the sky, take care that what you speak or act comes from a place of good. For goodness will always cast back goodness, and harm will always cast back harm. While notions of karma can sometimes be too abstract and philosophical to apply in our daily life effectively, I think the lesson here is about surrendering your emotions and living your life from a place of perspective and calm. No matter what the situation, if you surrender yourself to anger, in a way, you're surrendering your personal power to others, and doing so will ultimately give your life away. Perhaps the answer lies in being somewhat of a mirror, acting to reflect other's emotions back at them, showing them the truth of their actions. As always, a balance is required, though, as reflecting too much of others sometimes leaves little room for our own self and our own intentions. A lot of the time, people's anger comes from a place of pain, detachment, or sadness. This parable teaches us to be conscious of our response and remember that while we can't control others, we can control our responses to them. And if we're mindful to put our ego aside, then the power of serenity remains with you.