 Hi, my name is Rebecca Stump and I'm here today as the senior membership manager at Penn America. On behalf of nearly 5,000 writers, translators and editors of Penn, it's a great pleasure to welcome you to the 13th annual Penn World Voices Festival of International Literature. Briefly, Penn America is an organization that stands at the intersection of literature and human rights to protect open expression at home and abroad. We champion the freedom to write recognizing the power of the word to transform the world. Our mission is to unite writers and their allies to celebrate creative expression and defend the liberties that make it possible. This is no ordinary time for Penn America. We face unprecedented threats for our most important shared values. And your support is so important to us in fighting to protect freedom of expression and the press. Defending fact-based discourse and resisting measures that would impair the free flow of ideas. For more information about Penn and details about other festival events, you can visit penn.org or check out the program, the festival programs that are on the table out in the hallway. I'd like to thank the sponsors and supporters and the volunteers who make the Penn World Voices Festival possible. Thank you all for coming here this evening. And thanks to our guests for agreeing to take part in what promises to be a very wonderful event. Thank you. It's academic and it's theater. It's a place where we hope to meet. We have the audience and part of the story together. It's an educational practice. It's a start-up practice. It's a cultural practice. Examples of women sharing what it is they need to share and how they do that. There's no way you can ignore that anymore. What time is it now? We started out about different people and about different things. A whole sea of phenomena. The universe of everybody. Yes, everybody. So thank you everybody for coming to the third presentation of the place today. I'm sorry, I made you move over here again. My name is Frank Henschka. I'm the Executive Director of the Seedle Theater Center here at the Goyner Center CUNY. We do bridge academia in professional theater, international and American theater. Now for over 10 years we have been part of this really great literary festival, Penwall Voices Festival that really highlights the work of pen which is between literature and also human rights activities. We look up to that organization. It's a leading one and it's a great privilege for us to be part of it. We already heard places, we already heard places yesterday and today from Australia, the Ukraine, Turkey, Brazil, GUNY and today we're going to hear voices that come from Berlin and with us is Sasha Mariani Salzman who also flew in to be here with us as Patricia who came from Australia and where are the other writers from Turkey, from Brazil, Marcia and everybody. So again thank you for coming means the world to us. I'm going to move very fast. The translation was done by Jenny Peening and Mallory Catlett. Mallory here has been a good friend of the Seedle Center directed this reading and we have a spectacular cast here tonight so I think you're in really forward to reach those. Thank you for coming. We will have a discussion afterwards with Antje Ögel who's also my co-curator here of the festival and she will speak with Sasha and the actors and the director and so there will also be a little reception afterwards outside in the archive bar on so the six of them make an announcement afterwards so if you want to come and join us and my last thing is if you have a cell phone just take it out for a moment and make sure it's on the same. So you all did this, yeah? You all had yours out. It didn't read and why it did not ring in six readings so far so I hope it's not this one so again thank you all for coming and there you Meet Your Rights by Sasha Saltzman translated by Jenny Peening. Cast of characters, Cato in a snippet, Uzum the booba goddess of the limbo where everyone is stuck, Udi with Roy, Roy without anything, Serosh with himself. Europa, Europa, Europa. Where was Europa before she turned into the cunt that we know her as today? The drive-indictive cunt that she is today, where did she come from? Turkey. That's where she was before she was abducted to Crete and she wasn't always a cunt. Our good friend Europa used to be a travel, a bobble, a princess carried through the whole of Asia on a sedan chair and she was a collector. She got slaves to bring to her sedan everything that she encountered on her travels, put celestial observations and buskins, masks and formulas into the empty bellies of shells and sewed these into the inside of her robe. The seashells clapped slowly, rhythmically, against the sedan and brushed against her body. One day a luminous bobble approached her entourage. It's first shone like a diamond so that the collector couldn't stop herself from reaching out her hand to touch it. The animal's head was as big as Europa herself. She was so entranced by its luminescence, she was so hypnotized that she didn't notice that hidden behind the disguise of the animal was the highest of all gods, Zeus himself. Her hand was magically drawn to the fur. Hardly her fingers touched the silky hair then she pulled them back in fright, only to then sink them back into the fur. As it pulled by an invisible thread, Europa stepped out of her sedan and sat on the bobble's back. Carefully Zeus crept away, sure of having captured his prey. Taking small steps at first, then faster and faster, he fled with the virgin on his back. She cried out bitterly as she came to her senses, but did not let go of the bobble's horns for fear of falling and breaking into a thousand pieces. Inside her robe the items of her collection clapped in rhythm to the movements of the bobble's hips and cut into her skin. Unsure of where to bring his prey, Zeus jumped with the weeping Europa into the water. With blunt red eyeballs he carried her to a distant land where he raped her and beat her and begat her children whom she hated but did not kill because she didn't want to get her hand dirty and she cursed everything that she gave birth to and that came from the gods. She had to give up all the shells in her robe so that she would forget where she came from and that she already had history. She was searched, all her orifices were examined and she knew no more shame. The contents of her shells were scattered in all directions so that Europa, empty with no memory, went mad. She invented her own god that only believed in itself and denied the existence of all other gods. Several times a day she fell to her knees and prayed to her invented god and asked him to destroy all those who had done her wrong and to inflict war and diseases upon them. She hallucinated in this way, broke it inside into a thousand pieces until she became a barren stone that nobody wanted anymore. I find it disturbing the way they scream. I think it's cool. Can you turn it down a bit? We'll make it into the final, then you'll see. I can hardly wait. Germany's new summer fairy tale. My parents once took me to have my face painted at a street fair. I wanted to be a tiger. The woman with the face paint painted on these whiskers here and here and when my parents wanted to clean the face paint off in the evening the color came off but the whiskers underneath remained as red stripes. There was something in the paint. I had an allergic reaction to it and well anyway I ran around for quite a while with those stripes on my face. Couldn't get them off. I'd be careful about what you smear on your face. You never know. It's organic face paint. They make sure that it's skin friendly. Sure, of course. Another one? Imagine if you tried washing this flag off your face and it wouldn't come off. I get it. It must be awful. What? It doesn't remind you of something. All that screaming and stuff. How ridiculous you are. Doesn't it turn you on the way they're running? I'd rather watch a proper porn movie. You can be part of something. Be part of a porn movie? Refugees are really hard work. Who are you calling a refugee? If you're depressed, get treatment. There are therapists for that. Really good techniques and everything. I didn't sleep but left to go on holiday. To study. And then you just stayed. Yes, for love. Something like that. So you're a kind of migrant of love. Sounds better than a war refugee. I landed here. How do you say arrived? I just came without a plan. No, you haven't arrived. So it would seem? You don't have one. Yes, yes, yes. To save the world. My great grandmother cursed my grandmother for going to Germany. And my grandmother broke her back from Germany, pumped her lungs full of chemicals and loved her daughter to death. She was very proud this grandmother. She told me he came here for a good life. So live it, damn it. Don't be humble. I find it embarrassing to act as if I was here for nobler reasons. Migrant worker and war refugee. Both want a better life. One is forced into it. The other two. Torture. So we only feel compassion for those who are tortured. Yes, so not for me. Nor for me. Well then, we're both left. And was it worth it? What? For love. It's an excuse like any other. I see. We're having a good time. Oh dear. Look at that feeling where someone is so there that you have a feeling you're never alone. That you couldn't think a single thought alone without that person being a part of it. It feels as if every room, every centimeter is full of that person. And you love that person, sure. As far as I'm concerned. But you're so happy when it's quiet. When that person's smell is in your nose. Then you're just not in love. Maybe I'll just go back. Join the army of God. Did you know that ISIS is the goddess of birth and of magic, the protector of all who suffer? It means nothing to me. What doesn't? I'd rather watch the match. Outside a war is raging and here it's so peaceful. The live screening is outside and I'm sitting here with you. If you want to go outside I can keep an eye on face here. I like being here. The guests drink and dance and shag in the toilets and I'm there. You know, what's the uber goddess called? What uber goddess? I'm not book that you're reading. Hera. Exactly. I'm the Hera of this limbo. You watch football together and anybody supporting the wrong team gets thrown out. You don't want more? Children. Yes, children. Forgotten already? No. Good. Have you changed your mind? What happens when they support the wrong football team? Well that's a question of upbringing. I want children and a woman by my side and I want her to be there all the time. In my head and in my nose and I want to be with her all the time. I like having someone around. Lots of people. She and the children on Sunday afternoons so that I'm never alone and I like that she's thinking of me all the time no matter what she's doing by red tying the children's shoelaces and that I worry because I can't smell her. That sounds really low. I look at a photo of her and then I have to look away because it hurts my eyes because she's so beautiful. Do you know that feeling? Nothing can go wrong anymore. I'm proud of us. We've got a great plan. Pioneers. Aren't you proud? And thank you for giving me the strength. Yes. If I didn't know that I had you I wouldn't do it. You're looking at me as if I've said that before. No, I just don't know what you mean. Why don't you understand? Just say what you want to say to me. Which is it isn't that my breasts look great in this new push-up. Well, they do. Yes, they do. But that's not what you wanted to say. Nothing will change for us. Your voice will break. You'll never be able to sing again. Could be. I don't know yet. And your skin. Yes. And your bones and your smell. We'll all break. Yes. Don't joke about it. Sorry. How shall we tell the boys? To start with, we shouldn't tell them anything. Don't you think they'll notice that you're growing a beard? Maybe they'll be pleased. Is that it? Do you want to be attractive to men? I want to find myself attractive. You want to get away from me? You're not listening to me. We have an arrangement. What about that? It's not possible now. Don't leave me. I'm not leaving you. Of course you're leaving me. We have an agreement. We promised each other something. I need to do it now. Otherwise I'll have to leave you all. If I don't do it, why are you crying? You're not taking me seriously. It's hard for me to take you seriously right now with your face paint. Don't leave me. Get your hands off me. Don't take this away from me. Get off. Put it between my legs and tell me why everything has to change. Stop crying. You look ugly when you cry. Sorry. I just want to say I think it's good. I'm pleased. I'm pleased. It's just that I was scared that you want to leave me. Come here. Stop crying. No. Come here. You're going to get your blouse full of face paint. Then stop crying. I'll do anything. You can't. I have to do this. I'm like... Am I into nothing? What does it look like? I'll be with you in a sec. Once the goldfish should go away. He should go away. Oh dear. Piss off. You got something on your face. But then don't look. I hope so. Get off me. I can't get rid of that. Are you crazy? Grabbing my face like that? And what's that? No. Kato, now you've got dirt on your blouse. It's face paint. It'll wash it off. It's disgusting. Look. Leave it. Did you watch the opening match and let it get up? I have to justify myself. Come on. I'm just wondering why somebody like you would want the flesh on your face. Someone like me? We're going now. Well, hang on. Wait. What? What? What's with that look? Are you trying to look like you belong? You're the one who's trying. Seriosha, can you... Do I have to have a face Nazi like you tell me who belongs and who doesn't? I don't have to tell you. But I'd like to know what your friends running around in the same place seeing you, one of them, or a clown. I don't care what tricks like you. Your entire ghetto is proof of the fact that you don't care what others think. What's he doing here? Great cleaver. Shouldn't you put a flag on your breast? Two, there's enough room. I haven't got round to you. What? I'll tell you another time. Are you taking them? Yes. Kato is flying with me to my father's funeral. There, now you know. Can we... What do you mean? Seriosha, wait. What's your problem? I wanted to... I need to go with him. What? I need to go with him to... It's important. They're running all together? Yes. No. Now, I also like what my god, on someone else's plow. I need to fly to that fucking country from where I don't know if I'll be able to return. Of course I'm coming back to me. I'm coming back. Does he know? Does he know about your plan? Don't know about what. I'm coming back and... I hope you both snuff it in that shit hole of a country in that piss hole. Find a great big heap of shit. Crap. Really high. And it falls apart and the lumps roll across Europe. We agree on that point. Take her with you. Him. He. Please. Him. You tip out 20,000 square meters of concrete next to the Bretonville Gate. Plants, little trees around the edge. And add some ambient sand so that everyone knows. Here, you have to be the best. Be sad. Remember the tip. Something like that. And they just go in. Take off their t-shirt and show off their muscles to the camera. Yeah. And? It shows your body. And? It shows you that it isn't a place for people who want to remember their grandparents who were gassed. It's a place for the Nazi grandchildren so that they can pat themselves on the back for having overcome everything so well. Because gays can have photos taken of themselves in the Holocaust Memorial from Gay Romeo, which bleached with bleach teeth than a bleached asshole. What? Don't you think it's bad? I'm not in the mood for these kind of stories. How come I'm getting on your nerves? Your eyes are glazed. That's because of the light. You can't work like that. I can work better. Make this. It's a turn off. But I'm stoned. It's not good for you in that quantity. I had another look through some hands. I think we should forget about the center of town and look around the north beyond the eastbound road. I know you're not a fan but the area is changing. Really? Sure. I'll buy myself a pair of sprinting shoes to go with the new flat so that I can run fast enough when the neighbors come over with baseball bats. So don't be so bigoted. Being gay isn't what it used to be. And having black curly hair in an area like that is still the same as what it was. Have you seen how they're reacting to the war? Jew, Jew, coward, pig, camel, sad and fine alone. Yeah. And you want to go there? It's things like that everywhere. Should I emigrate? I don't know what you should do. I'm not moving to the north. Shall we go somewhere together? Where? Berlin. Sure. You're impossible to please. Here there are two gay. There are two homophobic. Over there are two races. And there are two Arab. Then leave me be. This foam isn't good for you. You keep hearing about how gays are being harassed and then you don't want to move anyone. Would it be better if nobody did the job? I notice it with myself. You know, I watch the news today and I can't get it out. Not just out of my head, out of my body. They keep advancing and I think, don't you also have violent fantasy? I mean torture fantasies? When you see them? The soldiers. That's me on TV. Don't you get it? I see myself there driving a tank. Walking through the desert in that dirt. You don't see any uniforms anymore. Just browny green sand from your neck to your feet. I look like that, you know? That's me. Been a young boy. He can't be more than 18 years old. Stretches his hand out of the tank and makes a victory sign. And laps with crooked tees from one side of his helmet to the other. And his pupils are so big. Big as his eyes. I imagine standing behind him in the tank holding on to his hip bones and he would shout, Eh Rich, Israel, our home. We were defending the Jews right to exist and I was banging him until I come in here while he's shouting like that. That's sick. You're sick. Come on. Don't you ever think of things like that? No. That's it. Everyone has, you know, ideas like that. Leave me alone. You can't say. Leave me alone. It wouldn't shock me, you know? I have a feeling we shouldn't do anything today. Do you know why I smoke so much? Because you're addicted. Because I'm sad. I'm in your body. When you go, I'll be even sadder and then I'll smoke even more. And then the police will come and arrest me and see that my papers have expired and then you'll never see me again. Do you want that? Or I'll bring the police to your office and they'll see that your papers aren't quite up to date either. And then they'll send us both back and we can wave to each other for one moment and another. Are you threatening me? Don't you want to ask why I'm sad? Go to the Holocaust Memorial, take off your t-shirt and see if someone comes. Tell them. And show your ass to the Nazi grandchildren. Are you pissed off with me because I'm smoking? Threatening me with the police is all I need. I'm sorry. Yeah, screw you. I love you. I love to screw you. Sure. You look fantastic today. And you're sweating. When you smoke too much, you sweat. I'm sorry. I love you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm on a dumb, strong-out junkie and deliriously happy with you. I don't know what I'm saying. I'm jealous. If they see us fighting, they won't take the bait. On the contrary, they'll think, cool, Arabs start to want to get off with each other. You can't see the Europe up there. Turks. They'll think we're Turks. Even better. Stop being a piece. Come on, stop being a piece. Come on. Stop being a piece. Yeah. And what if they throw me in the slam? I'll bring you cheese sandwiches. You come and visit me. Why would you throw your prison? Because I'm a cowardly motherfucking deserter. Who's coming to speed on his father's grave and is arrested because he's a deserter. And everyone knows what happens to deserters in this country. It would be nice if you came by briefly before they skewered me on a broomstick. Yeah. Come on. Don't hand it out. Like his whole life, that old kaja only caused problems. You make things problematic for each other. Kato, why won't anyone tell me? What he died of. Because they don't know. The fuck they don't know. We don't believe in an age in which you don't know something like that. You do an autopsy, cut open his skull cap, weigh his guts, and write in the file, died of. Then go there and do it yourself. I saw it on TV. All right. It's not like on TV over there. Everything is like on TV. Yeah, okay. You're right. And the whole world doesn't have a clue. He died of AIDS. Did they announce that on TV? And that's where they're not telling me because he died of AIDS. Some of his teeth fell out. What's that got to do with it? Exactly. Think about it. His immune system collapsed. Did they say that? Did someone tell you that? No. So what are you talking about? I know it. It's really easy to find out. You can't cover it up. In Russia? I paid $35 for my driving license. If I said I wanted to work as a doctor, they would have added a doctor's certificate for it. Why should they hide something like that? Okay, but... Exactly. That's bullshit. It's not. I don't know if you're suffering from grief or something, but maybe you should talk about it with someone, some professional, I mean. High ranking officers in the Russian army don't have AIDS. And even if you did, what difference would it make? That everyone in my, in the family knows except me. Well, why, they're nuts. Yes, exactly. The two of us. How do you picture it? Hey, granddad, by the way, was your son affected? Why? I beg it. Oh, don't take it seriously. I don't mean it like that. So what do you need? I need your health right now, and not for you to get hung up on my choice of words. Take me with you. I'll look after you. You don't really believe that, do you? Do you really want to? Yes. I don't want to go alone. I really want to. I don't want to go. I'm coming with you. And the passport controls. Don't let me in. You've got a different name. In your passport. I'll travel under that name. You're not allowed to drive you. You know it's forbidden for people like you. I don't have to drive a car. Right, you'll live longer. You see, they even prevent people from driving a car. Oh well, the way you drive might prolong your life. What are you afraid of? How long will it take with your voice and stuff? My voice and stuff. I need to know how to introduce you to my family and what I should tell them about you. I mean, you could still come as my wife, a woman like you. What do you mean, a woman like me? Well, they would just think that's the way it is in the West. That women look that way. I'll introduce myself to your family and then I'll ask, hey, hello. Do you happen to know whether this prick who we're burying today died of AIDS? I know there is no AIDS here. That's a Western gay person with disease and Russian officers are completely immune to it. But sometimes there are exceptions. And so I wanted to ask if you happen to know because, you know, my good friend, Sari Oshah, we're just friends, wants to know if his father, although it's neither here nor there, dead is dead, but we all want to know why we're sitting on his grave because he was a massive murderer. I'm not a faggot. You should know I'm also a faggot. You can say it to my face. Because you think I'm a woman, but you're wrong. I'm a woman like me, so a gay man. And I guess Sari Oshah is too when he bucks me. I don't want you to talk like that. Your father was a dirty rat who slipped open women and raped children. It's very likely that he had all kinds of diseases if not from women and children than from the drugs that they injected in order to go. Shut the fuck up. And I think now you should go there and tell him that you're a faggot because the Russians are right. It's an infectious disease. It proliferates and it's hereditary. And I'll come with you and tell everyone that we're planning on having children. I won't let you go alone. Do you understand? Nice phone. Thanks. Don't worry, I'm not going to make it. Well, thanks for telling me. It's what some people think. Why? Why not? Who's that black hair? Or because you're spending a bit too close to them. What are you drinking? White Russian. Sweet. And you? Water. Sex it. I'm the fox. Oh, dear. The wolf and the fox break into the farmer's cell a storm. They eat and eat until they're stuffed and the fox keeps going to the window to check that he can still fit through it. That he can still escape. And the wolf eats and eats. And then the farmer comes. With his shotgun and turns the wolf into a rod and the fox escapes. I need to keep checking that I can still get out. You're investing in the wrong one. Is this the stock market? I'm not here. Me neither. No, no, not like that either. I'm not looking for adventure. And there isn't a poor housewife sitting at home waiting for me. We're just talking. All right, I'm just talking. My name's so anxious. When you gaze, isn't it always about who reinvests how much in whom and whether it's worth it in the end? So the stock market after all. Instinct. My instinct tells me that you want to dance with me. Sexual harassment. That's why I work at the sexual harassment. At the gay harassment hotline. Then I would ask you, are you male? Are you gay? In what way were you harassed? There's a guy who won't leave me alone. Is he molesting you? Kind of, yes. Does he get in too close to you? Yes. Do you like that? I'll be gone in half an hour. From where? To the airport. That's why you got the suitcase? Where are you flying to? That's a good ploy. I've never come across that one, but the suitcase in the bar and saying, I'm about to go. The airport. It's good. I like it. I'll have one drink and then I'll go. Are you on the run? I have to go to a funeral. I'm sorry. Yes. Are you flying alone? Yes. Nobody should have something like that alone. Do you want to come? Yes. Will you take me? I'm going now. You don't look like it. You don't look like someone who's going. What do I look like? You look like someone who wants to talk. Can you just leave me alone? Would that be possible? I can, but you don't want me to. I can see it in your eyes. Are you going to come out with that, uh, your father must have been a thief? Speech? I don't know how to come. Yeah, your father must have been a thief. Your eyes are stars. That doesn't make any sense. Before that, there's something about stealing stars from the sky. I think that's what I really had. Yeah, what do you see in my eyes? Fail. I see. Did you prefer stars? I think so. They're very beautiful. You know that? I don't think you do, you know. You don't look like someone who knows what he looks like. You want to hear something about your eyes? They are the loneliest eyes that I've ever seen. And I find that very attractive. And you're afraid. And that also is beautiful on you. And I like the way you smile. Okay, that's bullshit that you didn't say. What? Stay here. Come with me. Nobody will notice. I think people will say, uh, funeral. The deceased will forgive you. I can't. I've got- A girlfriend? No. A girlfriend? Yes, it's complicated. I'm sure it is. Chaos was used to being misjudged by everyone. It didn't matter who made assumptions about him. Hardly anybody dared to get really close to him, but he didn't care because he had a calm nature and knew more than others. Most of all, he liked to smoke a relaxing hookah with his best friend Cosmos, who always contradicted him and tried to convince him of his laws of nature. Chaos smiled softly and darkened into himself, and let Cosmos have his way as he gave his self-placating monologues about the principles of gravity and weightlessness while Chaos devoured him with his dark eyes. And Chaos was fertile. He gave birth to Gaia, Nynx, Erebus, Tartarus, and Eros, love. He took tender care of his offspring and stroked each of their heads before they went to sleep. But love did not want to share the heart of Chaos with her siblings. Secretly, she was jealous of every touch that was not given to her. It seemed to her as if her siblings were always rocked to sleep for longer and hugged more tightly. She started to always fall from the swim and crawl with cut lips into Chaos's lap so that he would comfort her. She broke all her bones and lay in front of her parent with dislocated limbs so that he would only hear her screams, only sing to her. But Chaos saw through the child and did not treat her differently from her siblings. So one day, love ran away from home and now acknowledged Cosmos as her parent. With him, she was his only child. She could establish and dictate the rule and dream of remaining his only offspring. Cosmos took in the angry child with the broken bones and took care of it according to all the rules of gravity. But the more love denied her origins, the more crookedly her bones grew together. The paler and more angry and helpless her face became, the harder to comb was her head. She no longer washed. The foam from her cut lips had dried into a scab. Half crippled and stinking, she hobbled back and forth between the house of her parent Chaos and her new home with Cosmos, not knowing what she wanted, apart from controlling everyone she met. She threw herself on her victims, gnawed the skin from their bones, whispered and spat laws about gravity and weightlessness into their ears that she didn't believe in herself and ran off as soon as she recognized herself in her victims' eyes. Her weight squashed the bones of those who she threw to the ground and they could not get up again for a long time. They laid for ages with trampled legs, always with the memory of the greedy, jealous beast and the deep bite marks that she had left behind on them. Plain ticket, passport. He had a cute ass. Yeah, and a few hundred dicks have been in that ass. We can still do something with the passport. What do you think he was cute? Have you fallen for him? You're the only man in my life. Ah, let go. You're slippery. But you like that. The way you danced up to him, I thought you wanted him for yourself. How? Like this. What the hell else? Like this. Something. Do it yourself, I promise. Do it yourself, I promise. Can you get your hands off me? Ah, that hurts. You're totally contorted. Relax. What's that? You're getting to that age. Please be more careful. Breathe. I lie down with you for a minute. You smell different. Do I stink? Good. That must be enough. Not by one shot. At some point it has to be enough. At some point we'll open the casket and it will emit a gleaming light golden. And we'll have dollar signs in our eyes. No, Euro signs. Enough for at least five rooms. A masonette. Or a loft. With a roof terrace in the center of town. Who's ever talked about how many rooms you want? Do you know how many? I only want one. You can have all the others. I don't want anything without you. I want you to spread yourself out of all of the rooms. And I'll tidy up your things in order to find mine. I'd like that. To shadow you because your dirty socks are lying on my computer. Shit, it really hurts. It wants to choose everything together. Kiles for the bathroom. King-sized beds with mirrors on the left wall. On the right are blacked out windows so that we can stand in front of its naked and stick our naked asses on the backyard so that we don't see anything. That would be expensive. I want you to get lots of those plants that you're always talking about so that you can water them and take care of them properly. And that's not what I want at all. Get them muddled up and ground them because I gave them too much water because I was so nervous because he gave me responsibility for your favorite living thing. But deep down I'll probably just be jealous and give them too much water. And I want more that I want to eat out. And we lie in bed till evening and you'll read to me and we'll fuck and won't do anything else. Can you wait a minute? Soon we must have enough. We'll fuck lots of boys. And when we're through with it, with all the boys in the city, we'll start on all these. We'll go out to old people's home. Would that disgust you? It would me. But I would do it for you. Can we talk? And then the tourists. Don't forget the tourists. Every year so many come to the city. By now we really ought to wrap the money together. We're too lazy. We could have been more productive. How much have we got already? I don't know. 50? Less. 40? Less. 30? If that's the case, then we'll just have a few more years in this home. I'm going to go and count again. Something's wrong. It's much too little. I took some of it out. What do you mean you took some of it out? For what? My share. Why are you taking any out? We made a deal. Not to touch this money. It's for the flat. Not anymore. If you need something, you don't have to take it secretly. You can tell me. Give it back. It's mine. No, it's ours. Give it back. It's for the flat. I'm moving out. No, you're not. I don't believe you. It's annoying. Did you really just say it's annoying? Did you really use that word? We can carry on earning money together, but I need room for me. What kind of a shit room? You wanted to buy a flat and tell our children how we earned the money to buy it. We made an arrangement with the girls. For them, one for us, we can break that deal. Kato was started taking hormones. He'll be a heat. What's that got to do with it? What does that mean? It means he's dropping out. He can't have children anymore. What does that have to do with us? Do we have them with someone else? He'll be what he is. He's doing it now. Doesn't give a shit about anyone. About any arrangements. And isn't scared of losing everything. All of us. I'm going now. You can't go. You've got them bugged. Sit back down. We'll never save enough for the flat. Where do you get that idea? How do you know that? It's just not enough. It'll never be enough. What will never be enough? We don't have a future. It won't work. With me? With me. Is it because of Kato? I can talk to him. Talk to him. And you can't talk to him. You can't use shit to leave me like that. I'm a fox. I need to check that I can still get through the window. You cripple. Look at yourself. What do you have apart from you? That's okay. Can I carry that? Is that okay? You... Yes, you look really good in that. Will you help me with the cuff links? I'm in it. Is something the matter? Yes. What is it? Why are you looking at me like that? Here. What is that? Someone gave to me as a present. Just like that? Keep it. It's for you. Where did you get it? I'm walking along the street. And behind me is this old woman. And she holds out this ring to me again, and of course, I didn't drop it. But I liked it. I thought I'd take it. Did you give the woman money for it? I think it's made of gold. How much did you give her? Why? Just curious. Ten. Why? Why are you laughing? You're easy to con. What do you mean? Well, if you don't want it, you don't want it. It's very beautiful. It's kind of expensive. I've met so many of these women who find a ring. Young man, young man, is it yours? You just dropped it. Such a beautiful ring. You don't want to lose a ring like this. And you know how they earn their money. Because nobody tells the truth. That's not my ring, but thank you. Shit. I'm sure she needs the money. I don't think you've ever been others. I've done that money too. It was my last ten. I had it in my trouser pocket. Do you need money? My wallet is gone. What do you mean your wallet is gone? What? Will you marry me? What? Will you marry me? Can you stop that? What do you mean? Here's a ring. Let's get married. Say something, anything. I feel dizzy. I feel nothing and nobody. The floor is swaying. I want it to stop. You don't want it to stop. I need something to be stable. And that would be me? My knees are shaking. My knees are shaking and my skin is itching here on my neck. Can you see? I'm getting a rash. I want it to stop. And why do you want to marry me? It occurred to me when I saw this ring. I thought this pretty gold ring would look great. I don't care about those fingers. I don't care about those slim fingers. These meteor showers near Chirales. It must have looked like Armageddon. Burning stones falling from the sky. It must have been so light. All the car cameras recorded it. I watched one recording. Burning clumps of stone. Hailing down onto earth. And this guy, classically driving along the road. And when Amelia arrived, we just passed really close to his car. He just closes the sunroof. That's it. His expression doesn't change. Eyes right ahead. He doesn't flinch. If Amelia arrived, he flew past me. Well then, sunroof down. Keep driving. Stay on the road. Yes? And what are you trying to say with that? I wish I was like that. You'd like to be retarded. We're going to fly to this shady funeral. And when we survive that, we're going to marry. We'll get married there. And I'll introduce you to everyone. And we'll wear a white dress. You'll wear the white dress. I'll wear a white tuxedo. And we'll hire a limo scene. And drive much too fast through the city center. We'll throw out the chauffeur at a traffic light. And I'll drive you. You'll sit on my lap. I won't be able to see the road anymore. Because there will be white tool everywhere. And you'll kiss my neck when the rush is gone. And black in my ear. Don't you want to do that, though? Tiresias, the blind prophet, was born neither blind nor a prophet. Nor as a man or a woman. The offspring of a shepherd and a nymph, he lived as a priest of the mighty Zeus with an indefinable sexuality until he came across a snake pit. An accidentally killed a female snake. After this, he became a woman. Gave his notice to the highest of all gods and became the priestess of his wife, Hera. Tiresias married and had children and could have lived happily ever after, but he was tormented by being seen only as one thing, as a woman. And so he went back to the same snake pit and this time took out a male snake and killed it. But instead of being turned back to what he was, instead of being turned back to what he was born as, a combination of everything, he became a man. He was sure that there was no way of going back to his original perfection as a man-woman. The now male being left his children and his husband, wandered the earth and told people about his original state, that the division into one more the other signified a perpetual restriction, a crutch, which was the reason why humans never attain happiness and why they told themselves stories of two halves that belong together and search for each other. But what they were searching for and those who believed it were stupid. What they were searching for were the two parts in their own bodies. Those who only saw themselves as one sex were cursed to everlasting incompleteness. The gods were outraged the tyrosias had revealed the secret of all secret of humans, because long as humans were searching for one another, they let the gods be, they not follow them themselves with their scheme. But now the humans were rising up and shaking their fists at the heavens in the sense that the gods had divided them into two sexes in order to be able to control them better. So the gods blinded tyrosias, who continued to wander the earth and tell people what he knew, because he had been born as both. Now, cursed and divided, he learned the language of the birds and became a prophet in order to continue telling the secret of the gods to humans. Is that for a funeral or a wedding? I don't know what they wear over there. I've never seen you in a dress. Me neither. That's wrong. I know. Why are you doing that? I just wanted to see if I convinced first, or was it all that just to get rid of me? I thought of having a photo taken of me in my dress and sending it to my parents. I was thinking about all those photos of me in which this frassled kid has to put up with being photographed and close. They just didn't care that I fought tooth and nail that I started lashing out and they made me wear skirts. And then they would quickly take a photo and send it to my grandmother, as if to prove I was completely normal. What do you think they'll say? One last photo before they never recognize me again. I need to go. Shall we take a photo of the two of us? You and me in dresses? I don't have any time. I have to buy firecrackers. During the last time before the end. That was crazy. Not having any firecrackers left after the fourth goal. And then there were another three. The whole neighborhood jerked off too early with excitement. Did you see? No. Okay, man. Wait. I... Are you feeling alright? What are you doing? I'm trying to buy myself a lipstick. I don't know how long I've been standing in front of the shelf. The whole time I've been trying to work out my lipstick. Excuse me. Can you help me? Why are you doing this? Nothing subdued. It is a funeral after all. Red for sorrow. I'm going to paint my lips red and then flags on my cheeks like you. And then... Yes, and then... Why are you wearing a dirndl? One of the players was also wearing one of these. Just like this one. In pink. Why are you wearing a dress? I don't understand. Tell me you're going to be in and I can fuck off out of your life. Then I meet you and you're running around in a dress and want makeup tips. We're going to be in the final. What don't you understand? Isn't it dangerous to wear something like that? They're all drunk and shouting. Do you have any idea how much you wrecked? No. I've never been so betrayed. How did I betray you? I don't care what you are. Well, I do care what I am. I want you just the way you were in between. I'm not in between. And what are you? A faggot in a dress? I'll call you sometime. Don't. Don't call me. I'm alright. I've been feeling fine. Much better since you stopped calling. Really, since I found out what a shit you are, I've been doing great. Please don't call me. I'm starting to forget the sound of your voice. That helps. But your voice will be completely different anyway. Everything about you will be different. Hey, who knows how you'll turn out? But you've certainly got balls. I can't deny that. I'm getting married. Congratulations. Excuse me. Well, yes. You're ridiculous in a dress. Yes. Are you getting married at the funeral? Do you really believe it? What? That he'll marry you? Someone like me, you mean? Are you getting married as a man? I am a man. If I get married, then as a man. Don't you get it? I can wear dresses or suits. I'm sorry if that confuses you. But it's your own body that you can't accept. Not mine. I want your breasts to the whole football stadium and find something out about yourself. Why am I betraying you all? I'm not you all, I'm me. Why am I always betraying everyone by doing what I am? Why? Lodge with me. Excuse me? Do you want to watch the match with me? You and I will celebrate your engagement with lots of firecrackers and wearing a dirn. Firecrackers and sit on the roof. Watch the match. Let off firecrackers and scream. It's really liberating. Honest. Join in. I've been talking a lot about my grandmother lately. I haven't talked to her. Although she's not here. She came here when she was my age and she didn't know anybody. She just ended up here. In those days, there was no internet. Skype, all that shit. She phoned her family in the village once a month. Lived in a home. Sometimes people stood outside with torches and shouted in the language that she didn't understand. Learned the language. Produced children. And when she knew she'd done what she had to do, she went back. And since then, has lived on what she made. All alone. And I think of her and wonder how she knew that. That it was right. Because you can only have that much strength if you know that something is really right. Where you are. Where you've ended up. As if you hadn't just ended up somewhere randomly. From one place to the next. From one person to the next. But nothing is random or futile. Absolutely. You know it. You're so sure of it. That it's not even an issue. You don't even question it. You simply come. You simply go. You know that where you are is the right place to be even when people are standing outside your door with torches shouting the opposite. I actually only have that feeling when I look at your face. Then I have this strength in me. This feeling of being in the right place otherwise I don't. Otherwise never. It's teasing you. Disgusting. We don't have any pets. When did you last open the windows? I have no idea. I'm afraid of touching something in case I catch something. No joke about it. It's really dirty here. And ugly. Great. Can you stop now? What kind of trash is that? Is it a gay thing to like things like that? Such obviously ugly things as tasteless as it's possible to get. We bought it together. It was expensive. In an antique shop for the new flat. I thought we moved together in a new flat and they don't hang it up. Great. Now don't stop crying. My passport. Shit. Get up. What are you doing? My whole body hurts. Hey. They had plans. We had two girls with whom we wanted to make children. One for there, one for us. We want to be so perfect. Get up. It hurts. Yes, of course. It hurts. Can you hold me for a moment? You want me to do what? Can you hold me? For a moment? No. Do I stink? No. Please. Just for a minute. I haven't been outside for days. I haven't eaten. And yes, alright. I also haven't showered. And then I go on to the streets to just think of ways to kill myself and who do I run into in this big city? You. Please. I know it's stupid. But can't you give me a hug? Then I'll stop crying and talking and then we'll quickly find your passport and you can go and forget about me as if nothing had happened and I'll kill myself. What's he doing here? We're looking for Sergio's passport. Sergio's? Yes, my passport. If that's alright with you. That's how you're looking for his passport. You're the guy from? Yes, the guy from. Why did you bring him here? Thanks for the little dance. The other day, his passport. And so you bring him home with you? His father died. He has to go to the hospital. You want me to believe that? He needs help. I don't want to get involved. I just put my passport and my money back and then we can sort it all out without the police and part ways without anybody else. I thought you weren't gay. I'm not. Is this your consolation prize? You're suddenly jealous? You were fucking with me. You're doing that to yourself the whole time. How long has this been going on? It's got nothing to do with you. I'm going to call the cops now. You do fuck all, Ballerina. Your phone is now my phone. And now get the hell out of here. Okay, okay, hey, let each other go. Come on, Sidio, shut up. I said stop. Stop it. Moscow, 4th floor of 15, green hallway with flickering ceiling lights. Sometimes none. These are all the images I have. Does anyone care? The same blood is flowing in your veins as in mine, my boy. Never forget that. What does that mean? Death is flowing through your veins, old man, and through mine. They'll arrest me on the spot. They'll drag me to the military, straight from the airport, in the country with the highest suicide rate in the world. The boys don't brush their teeth for weeks then scrape off the plaque and inject it into themselves in the hope that their arm will fall off and they can't shoot. And not at themselves. Only if you survive. Forget it, I can't go there. Yes, Ed. And then what? To stand with my hands in my pockets in front of an unbound doll waxed like linen so that my uncle can whisper in my ear hands out of your pocket and stand straight. You stand to attention in front of an officer. For God's sake! They could come and stand with me and think they can say something so that they can smell me, touch me, judge me, this product from the West. Our pride and joy. I'm neither your nephew, nor your son, nor a soldier. Get your hands off me. Drink this and I'll put the rest on your wounds. Ah, it hurts. Swallow, don't think. Don't think. It's okay. As a child, my parents would rub vodka on me when I had a fever. No, then your parents did something right. That's how you turn babies into alcoholics. Not you. You're still just sucking at your glass. What are you doing? Rub it in. It's cold! I'm glad that you came. Thank you for for taking care of me. I couldn't leave a mud like you just lying on the street. I wasn't lying. Sure. You were just having a little rest, I know. Is that what you think of me? What do you think about me? Do you find me attractive? Listen. No, listen. Do you find me attractive? My tits? My ass? Yes. The way I am? Yes, I find you attractive. I find everything about you attractive. And if it all changes? If I start growing hairs on my chest? Do you want me to cut them off? I'll smell different. Can we talk about it one step at a time? Do you love me? What's up with him? When I was a child, they never really rubbed me with anything. When I was in pain or made me tea, I did it myself. When I was five, I already knew how to make a tea for an upset stomach. By the age of 12, how to use a condom. I told my mother, I'm not a virgin anymore and she looked at me like, congratulations. And now what? When blood came out of me, I didn't dare tell anybody about it. I thought he was playing a joke on me. This can't be. It will stop. Finally, bleeding, the doctor told me I tell you so many things they keep trying to persuade you the whole time. I hate going to this therapist. I have to go over and over everything and act as if I'm suffering. I'm not. I'm not suffering. I'm very happy. I'm really optimistic. About us? I was under zooms again. Oh. I just thought I should tell you. What do you mean you thought you should tell me? I'm never in a shop. So you felt sorry for her? Let me. No. I want everything to be out in the open when we go to the funeral. I don't want there to be anything between us. I always want to be truthful with you. That's why I'm telling you. Always the truth. Yes. How nice. Your truth is everything is going to turn out great. Because I know. Because you see me for what I am and I see you for what you are and it works. Always the truth. Why are you still looking at me like that? I'm going on. No way. Here's your truth. I'm going on my own. No. I'm coming with you. You're not invited. Yes. What kind of a bad person are you to say something like that? You fuck a woman who would kill for you so that I don't get angry you even say it didn't mean anything or that it really did not mean anything. You're really disgusting. Serious. I find your face nauseating. Have you looked in the mirror lately? Sometimes it just melts. Have you noticed when you pull that face when you're pulling now then your eyes flow apart you look retarded. Please wait. I've never punched someone in the face but with your mouth sometimes when you start to quiver I just want to punch you. Don't touch me. I'm not touching you. I find you hideous. You think it's because of UZUM? But I'm as turned off by that whore as I am by you. Fuck whomever you want. That's the truth. Here it is. When I imagined taking me with you I wanted to get out of here on the next flight and then some time it's still my ticket and my passport and I'm stuck here with you. What are you doing here? Who told you you could be here? It's my flat. Piss off. Leave. You already had a ticket? I had a ticket. Just for me. I went to a bar for a quick dream then these blackheads pulled one on me twice. Fucking illegal immigrants. I got it back. My passport. I don't want to see you anymore in your face. It's changing as if there's something under your skin that's crawling apart. Stay still. Otherwise you'll be running around with those bushes for a while. At least put a towel around it. It's nice to hear you lost. Yeah. Nice to laugh. Don't get it. Let's not do that. We're not doing anything. You're pressing a load of ice on my face and hoping that I choke. I can't feel my nose anymore. But maybe it's broken. What kind of guys do you pick up? What do you mean pick up? I really thought you were fucking. Fuck off. I'm a psychopath. I found it sexy that you beat someone up for me. I didn't. I'm still pulling that image. I didn't pick him up. What did I press too high? If it wasn't already broken it is now. I'm not sorry. I miss your voice. Even if it's unimportant. I'm probably not allowed to say this. How are you? I mean, stupid question but seriously. I love you. Yes. If you stay with me I'll do everything. Just lie like that and I'll hold you and you lie back. And when my nose is healed you'll break it again. Why did you come back here not to work things out? I'm going. In a minute. What? Lying on the pavement. Really? I thought I'd drop by to see how you are. Not true. I was scared on the street. Stupid, yes. But I ran through the street and suddenly I had this feeling that it isn't safe. You always loved me so much I thought you didn't need me. I couldn't want to leave you be standoffish and you still cope. You simply love me. No, I don't. I don't cope. How's your back? It wasn't an embargo. It was my jaw. I was at the dentist. He said if I don't stop grinding my teeth my spine will snap. I tense up my jaw muscles so much it spreads everywhere else. If I carry on like that then I won't be able to walk anymore in a year and my spine will split in two. And then he asked me if it has to do with where I come from. And I didn't understand what he meant and just looked at him. I'm lying on the dentist chair practically upside down with this white bib around my neck and him with his mouth guard I just didn't understand if he was really asking me that or something completely different. And then he says it again and loud whether it has something to do with my native country that I tense my jaw so much. And when I still don't move he repeats the question in English although we've been speaking in German the whole time. And then he says he's spoken about it with these colleagues. Some of them have patience from that country. It must be awful. What a state of affairs. And sticks this huge instrument down my throat I have to puke. I was sick all over myself. Do you know the jaw muscle is the strongest muscle in the whole body? What? Can be so bad that you don't want me anymore. I'm going to go Odie. I can't stay here with me. I came here to tell you that. I think whenever I see your face I forget it. And when you go do you know where? It's always better. It's not about that. There's a funny atmosphere at the moment. Yes. I don't like that screaming. It doesn't look like it. It looks like they're snarling. You look like that too when you come. Yes. They're all having an orgasm. How are you doing? I'm very well. Seriously? How are you? I don't feel like having this conversation. Okay. Can I stay here for a bit? Yes. May I? You know what bothers me? You don't say can I be with you for a bit. You say can I stay here for a bit? I'm just something where you can be when you throw this around. You throw me out and you have to think over a few things. It's going through a difficult. Why don't you fly with them? His decision are yours. Morning phase probably. Did you tell them about us? That's a real event. I can feel how my bones are growing. It's a strange feeling. My skin is becoming rougher. Here on the chin and also the shoulders. Have you noticed? Here. The doctors say that's the way it should be but don't want me to get dressed in front of them. They're afraid of touching me. People like me is 23. The probability of long term relationships is nobody tells you that it has to do with the fact that you are what you are. Well some tell you but with them it's fast. Almost painless. It's much worse with the ones who don't say it. You still want to have children? What? You want to have children? You want to come really badly? Yes. I understand. Were you about to offer me some? No. Why bang on about it, right? That nobody wants you? Yes. You can understand that. Probably. What it means not to be if you want it. It's strange that you haven't got a clue or don't you want to have a clue? How much you're hurting me? What's your problem with women? Is it some kind of revenge? Why? Man. Only a man can be that egotistical. Not noticing what's going on around you. Are you also going to have a dick son on? Zoom, wait. You don't care where you stay. If your mate throws you out you don't care about anything. You don't care about me. You don't care about women. You're turning away from us. Do you think you have to be like that to become a real man? When you're here. I don't know anymore who I am when I look in your face. That was the only thing that ever caught me. And now you're taking it away from me. You're taking away our children. You're talking about skin problems. Your face is about to burst with all of those hormones so taught. I'm afraid your eyes are going to pop out. I can't deal with it. It hurts me. Your rough face everything that you say it makes me sad to see something like you. I'll be totally honest with you it's you. Short and sweet you make me sick. The cops found out that Terusias could hear them because he understood the language of the birds. And so they sent eagles that were as big as cliffs with sharp talons and beaks out of bronze and they chased Terusias across the flat disc of the earth. He had hardly laid down to rest and he heard a wild screeching and through the beating of their wings the gods themselves screamed. There was no effort to hide from them. The birds pecked at him but they didn't kill him. They only ever ate a piece of his flesh which then grew back together so that he would feel the pain all over again. Half eaten up blind and ripped his eardrums in the hope that he in the hope that the gods would forgive him. He crawled on all fours over the fields smelled the grass groped at stones tasted the nectar of the blossom and for the first time in ages he was happy because he didn't know anything anymore about gods and humans. Soon he had forgotten them completely and broke out in a laugh that reached to the furthest cave to talk to us. Disgusting, now come and have another drink. It's on me. Does it really give you such a kick? Yes! Go and change your panties. No, just take them off. I don't think there's anything that makes you feel less like you belong. But it's your victory too. I'm glad you didn't say you're a war. Please don't do that. I want to be happy. At least today. What's your problem? We're sitting here and watching the world fall apart in slow motion. I'm just watching it grow together again. It sounds like an indefatah what they're doing out there. Shut up, let's drink. Cheers! I don't want to go home. To us! Yes, to us. Exactly, thanks. It suits you. I want to give me something when he didn't want it himself. Same here. I wish you were dead. I want things to be so bad for him that he goes blind. That he dies lonely and abandoned. I wish you were here now. What would you say? I would smash his face. Not probably not. What would you want to say? Come back. Why? Why do people come back? Because of me. Because we were good together because he wiped in my arms. Everyone does that at some point. He had such a good plan. Jewish children. Excuse me? Okay. Kato dropped out, but you can still do it. He and I would adopt children because one of the fathers is Jewish because there are no half Jews. Anyone can tell you that. If the grandmother of your second cousin had a Jewish cat, then your whole clan is Jewish forever. And that is great. If he and I have children, the world stands a chance. Why not also say Syrian or Turkish? It's got nothing to do with where they came from. Being Jewish is a condition. A chosen one. A chosen one. I think I'm going to take you with me to my place. No, I'm serious. If everyone is Jewish, then everyone's equally fucked up. No differences, no nations. And we could start to hate each other for different reasons. Love, for example. And on the way back to mine we'll make Jewish children. Can you imagine me with a little thing like that, with a little powder like that as big as the palm of my hand? I would put it on my shoulder like a mouse. I would just leave it and mumble in my ear when it's thirsty. Can you imagine that? Right. And let's make it to mark the occasion. Let's make children. This is the right, the only right evening for it. Udi, you're right. Everything is collapsing, flying apart. You're right. But we're not. Let's celebrate that. Let's make children right now. Now? Yes. Here? On the bottom? Yes, if you like. To hell with them. To hell with all of them. What do you mean? To hell with them. If they don't want to join in. Just you and me. Why not? Make the world a better place. You can just talk about it sooner. So I see. Oh please, oh please not. It will be so much worse than I thought. Can you just pour me a big glass of something? Sure. Are you drinking too? It's on me. It's on you. Anything wrong with that? No, there's nothing wrong with that. You're always buying us all a drink. Did you watch the match? No, I didn't watch the match. I had to work. But you know already, it's hard not to hear. Are you pleased? What's the matter? Do you feel sick? Can only taste the vodka. Would you prefer a glass of water? No. What are you doing here? It's a sign. Both of you here today. This evening. With me. I think you should both stop this nonsense. Really. You belong together. We all belong together. This is the night. Look outside. Right. Listen. This running away, not running away is ridiculous. We all want to run away, but nobody does it, right? Listen. As clans. And the three of us will be its parents. Right now. Joking. Did he puke? Only vodka is coming out. There are nicer ways of reacting to clans than starting a family. I got this phone call. The voice. It was familiar, but also not. It was metallic. It took me so long to work out that I knew it. The voice. I was on the night shift and there weren't many calls. The usual harassment on the street, gropeing between the legs, someone got a black eye. Statistics. I asked the usual questions. What did the perpetrators look like? Did they have an immigrant background? And then this voice calls up. I go and I said, this is the gay harassment outline. But she said she's a he and is being pursued. And I can hear that she's running this person. And of course I think I know this person. Only that she sounds different now. Tinning. But I know her. And then there are fireworks and everyone's screaming. And I'm worried that the line will cut off. But I can still hear it, the voice. And she knows me. It calls me by my name. Somebody's shouting in the background. I don't know whether it's in my street or where it's coming from. As if it was all one space. The voice is panting and tries to tell me something while running. But I can't understand anything she says. I say, I'm going to call the police. Tell them where you are. And then I can hear the others getting closer. Cattle-walling. And the person on the telephone screams. And I can hear how she's being beaten. I hang up. Hang on and call the police. And then I find that a person called up and screamed. Someone needs to come quickly. The address. He didn't tell me where he was. The name. Cattle. But that's not his name. Not his real name. I know his other name. But then someone asks me exactly where she had to go. She didn't know why, but she knew she had to. On the bank of the river that she had run to, and she sat down next to him in silence. For a while they looked at the shimmering surface of the water together. And some mosses took two thin cigarettes out of the breast pocket to the flowing shirt that she was wearing. She put them both between her lips, lighted them, and offered one to her macroditis. They smoked for a while. The water gave off quivering sparks and dazzled them both. So that they kept having to shut their eyes. How long have we been here already? Salmosa's eff asked her macroditis after they had finished the cigarettes. I have a feeling you will be doing this for ages, replied Dean, who was seen in the glinting white of the bright sun and suddenly could have also been an old man. He took off his clothes and went into the water. He didn't turn around, didn't indicate for Salmosa's to follow. He went deeper and deeper into the water until it came up to his neck and looked up. He didn't hear Salmosa's coming in. As in him, she was burdened neither by the earth's scrappy nor its slowness. The shirt didn't make any noise either. She had taken everything off and came in naked. Her strong arms entwined to macroditis's thin neck like a gust of wind. She swirled her tongue around his head like a snake. Her heels clawed at his hip bones. She glided inside him and threw his skin, melted into him until they were one. And so, of macroditis and Salmosa's danced at the single body until they disappeared under the surface of the water. In his new body, which was man and woman, macroditis shown in transcendental perfection. This body carried him against the laws of gravity with the likeness of a nymph. During the midday heat he usually tried to rest in the shade of his mother, love. Naked, lying on his stomach, half on his side, folded his arms under his neck. His face turned away from the sun and fell asleep. One day, some humans saw the shade of the temple at midday. They saw this beautiful being asleep in a sea of fabric and knew that it must be the perfect body that the prophet Tereces had described before he disappeared. They came closer and looked at him. The power of his whole breasts and his sex rested on the linen. His long hair gathered up in the nape of his neck. The balls of his feet pressed into the fabric so that the cloth enveloped his body in soft waves. They were confused by his body because they knew that it was everything that they could never be. That it challenged everything that they did, made a mockery of it. They knew that they would never attain his knowledge, but they knew that he had no objection. He lay there like a peaceful fissure on the steps of the temple, like a mockery. If he was real, then nothing that the gods had told them was true. If he was real, then they had spent their entire lives chasing after the wrong thing and would do so forevermore. They removed his feet, his thighs up to his knees, then his ribs. They ate his member. Then they went to his mother. The people were horrified and saw what they had done. They created a sculpture out of marble that was exactly as long as the body of the emphroditus when they found him and carried it into the temple. Having been turned into a myth, he could not harm anyone anymore. From this moment on, it was a story. You could find it beautiful, you could mourn it. But the mother of the emphroditus, Love, promised eternal revenge. Spitting bile, she fell upon to earth, broke into a thousand pieces and settled herself into every eyeball like a poisonous arrow. Since then, every time you blink, I'm there and I'm not moving. Scratching their eyeballs from the inside, there's no need to look like that. Hello. I'm Solar, thank you. Jump right into it. Thank you both so much for this amazing presentation here. Manaree for directing it and Sasha for writing. Yeah, it is. For writing this beautiful play that we had the pleasure to present here today. The play takes place during a very eventful year in 2014, right? When Germany won the Soccer World Cup and I think Ukraine was invaded by Russia. The refugee crisis started in Europe. There's one of that background. There's a lot happening there in these people's life. Can you tell us a little bit about your inspiration? My world was falling apart that summer, which is quite obvious, I guess. Yeah, biographic note, I got a Russian and a German passport. Russia started to fuck Ukraine and I'm Jewish and Israel was again destroying Palestine in the same summer and we had the so-called refugee crisis which means like in Berlin this school occupied by refugees because they were like they were about to send back and there were some guys they hide it on the roof of the school and they said they're going to jump at the police so we were demonstrating in the streets like during the daytime we would work on place like that and it was kind of obvious that if you do art about that you also go demonstrations and we spent our nights there and at the same time my personal world was also collapsing and I didn't know how to deal with all this involvement I felt responsible for everything which is wrong in the world like in Russia and Germany and Israel and everything was so wrong and as it always is writing is the only solution for me like the only way to deal with things this summer is so important for Europe but especially important for Germany I guess it meant a lot to become a world power again and all those shitty flags all over the streets and yeah it made a change this summer really made a change and since then like it's three years ago and since then people say that every summer is going to be this summer because the so-called pride is back and the so-called refugee crisis is increasing and well as we know Ukraine is not really better I'm not even starting with Israel and Palestine so yeah it's kind of like it's maybe a picture of a very hot summer we had and your characters also embodied these conflicts really so maybe you can also tell a little bit about different myths that are moving through so also very obvious that I used Ovid's metamorphosis for it I thought of calling it metamorphosis first and they told me that's already been done and I was like yeah okay that came from different thought I wasn't looking for topic or bodies this is what you've seen this is my chosen family in Berlin and I that's the world I see and how we act and how we react to what is going on they look like very chosen oh we need a Syrian or an Israeli guy but actually I was not really looking for it that's us and I thought I've been I don't know which play it is but I've been asked so great to have all these queer bodies on stage thank you for bringing it to contemporary writing and I think it's ridiculous because like I'm gonna ask people about Shakespeare or Ovid all the stories have been told since so many hundreds of years but we are pioneers that's said in the beginning of the play we are constant pioneers we are like damned to be oh the first one oh I didn't know oh sorry this is so beautiful thank you for telling me that and I think that's really offensive so I use very obviously Ovid to prove that this stories has been there since we've been there like human beings and if you go like I don't know I'm sure here also in US but when I've been to Rome I've been to every possible museum and all the sculptures are there and I mean they were not made up people what we call today intersexual or transgender people like we need all these labels for people they've always been there and there are proofs for it and art is there to prove it and I guess I was trying to make the point that it's not just a new thing we brought up because we are so you know spoiled in the western society that we have time for queer concerts so how was the critical reception of the piece well it's Berlin you know but yeah very different like of course like I don't know if you're familiar with the Berlin scene but we are like we are super critical about everything and then we are even more critical about being critical there have been a lot of discussions I knew it especially on terms of representation I wrote this piece because I work in Maxine Gorky theater which is not having a very diverse ensemble and I knew that we have a cis person in the ensemble so I knew they are going to be bodies who can't perform it at the same time other theorists ask for permission to stage the plane in the end they check it out because they said oh we don't have and then they didn't even finish the sentence you know like it's like you know and I found that very interesting but also the fact that I don't think that a transgender person necessarily has to play a transgender person that like a Turkish character has to play like you know the discussion but we have them and I think it's productive to have them I'm not against it at the same time of course we have the old old school conservatives like in the premiere there was a guy sitting next to my mom and he of course didn't know that it's my mom and he was like when the gay scene started and they do it like really hot I mean like they dance like for 10 minutes it's awesome and like this guy nearly puked and and he started to talk to my mother about it because she looks like she's like a decent beautiful lady and she's like why are we watching this so we have them too of course and I love it I love the conversation I love the fight I love the fact that my mother stands up for our rights like you know she's forced to be in a situation to say something about not her world but a person who loves isn't part of it and I guess that makes us all better in a way or forces to deal with things which makes the world a little better so you mentioned the casting that's something that I actually want to talk about as well I think you had your choice of casting was fabulous maybe you want to talk a little bit about that well I mean actually I actually skipped with Sasha to talk specifically about casting because I just wanted some background around literacies that she made and she was really open to whatever I wanted to do but so I mean I always think like I mean this has been fun because there's two two people on the cast who I've never worked with but I know really well and I always have one to work with and so I was like right away I was like oh you know and it just worked out that they were available and then the rest I was like on a like a mission asking people do you know and it took a really long time but I think sometimes that's really fun about doing readings is that it's sort of an adventure and it's a way to kind of work with people you've never worked with before and so it's like all casting I think you know there's a few pillars of certainty and then there's the sort of adventure and the luck of the draw I mean I'm asking people who are really great and they're giving me really great recommendations so but it always feels like oh you know like certain things fall down the ground and you're like okay that's what we're gonna you know so but yeah I mean I think I did this thing where you know I found Amir and Moti who were Russian and Israeli and I was just really interested in the conversation we could have quickly as a group of artists and with Azure just about like this comparison once you know the sort of intent of the playwright in the context like what is the how do we bring ourselves to it and like what's the conversation around that even the playful conversation that actors have and so I think it was an interesting mix of matching and not matching in a way so yeah I mean I don't I don't know if I have more to say about than that but well I always think well it's in order for a play to work in different cultural contexts I think casting is such an important important part of the process right because you don't want to just put it in like a certain you know draw okay that's the German playing we're going to cast people that look all very German like they could German accent I mean I will say that I did I was cognizant that we're in New York and I did want to sort of present it differently than maybe Sasha had like in terms of the casting as opposed to just because I was interested in the intersection of like how New Yorkers would meet the play through Berlin in a way so I did I did want to cast it differently also how you had cast it or how it was cast but just because I think it's always fun to kind of when you give your play away like different people different bodies do it it brings up different things so well before I open it to the audience one last question okay so then I open it right away oh no okay um was it the first time you saw the playing English yeah so what's your take here how did you like it well I obviously loved it because the guys are so great I mean like you guys were awesome and I think it really works great also because German and English are very close and I think the humor also is very close and like the staging was really on point so I think that really works also like my inspiration like the plays I really like to read and to see UK and US so I feel kind of close to this theater culture anyway so now you already mentioned that you're also a writer in residence at the Maxim Goki Theater you're also artistic director of their studio yeah a former I gave it up to write the book oh that's right and she's also she just finished a novel so that's coming out in September in Germany and then hopefully also here at some point in translation right I signed the contract up for me for the English translation so it means in a year you got the book so well well even though you're not artistic director of studio yeah and more so what was I'm still curious what was your what did you do there so what was your mission very long story to make it short like we were like an artistic crew coming to the state theater and we were kind of like a disaster for Berlin because they never seen a group like us in the state theater Shaman Langkow would be our like artistic attendant and this is a woman with a Turkish background, communist everything you can think of and Shaman told me like we have two stages in Maxim Goki big stage and small stage and she said I don't have money for the small stage we would have to close it or you take it and do whatever but with no money and I said yes and I thought Berlin doesn't need off spaces Berlin is full with cool off theaters we need places where we can negotiate we need political spaces we need to understand theater also as a part of network we need to connect to dance and discussions and demonstrations so studio became more that kind of a project and it increased and it's beautiful that it's like it's growing and like there's so many things to say about this since we don't have time to say it was very it was it still is kind of like it's just a space it's network it's a way of thinking I guess and it's not only theater and it's just it's partly in the Maxim Goki but it's also in magazines and on the street on demonstrations when the people from the network they go on demonstrations they send me videos and I was writing my book I left Berlin for Istanbul and I was writing my book in Istanbul and I got through a whole year since I left videos from demonstrations and that was also studio yeah and that made me very proud well I think we have a little exception we hope to be also we will join up and we can talk to you about East 36 it's on 36 from the archive it's far between 50 and right on the on the south side so I hope you will be joining us so thank you for monitoring thank you for coming all the way from Berlin thank you