 Have you ever been emotionally shamed or manipulated into making a decision that you didn't want to make? Maybe make a sale, buy something you didn't want to buy, maybe make a decision you didn't want to make or maybe not make a decision that you actually wanted to make. Anyway, if you have these kinds of regrets because people emotionally manipulate you or shame you into doing or not doing certain things, in this video I'll show you how to never ever have that happen to you again for ever. So I'll start off by telling a story that actually a true story that happened to me when I was 18. I was in Hamburg in Germany and I was in a street called Rieperbahn, which is sort of like the red lights district of Germany, kind of a big street filled with strip shows, brothels, cool restaurants and shows. And I was walking along in that street, I was on tour then and I saw this kind of strip club place and I really wasn't very interested in going in, but so I kind of went along. But then the guy at the entrance, the doorman, kind of told me like, hey dude, look, come inside. And I was like, no, no thank you, you know, I'm good, I don't want to spend any money there. I don't want to do anything. It's fine. And then he tells me, look, it's completely fine. You can just sit down, you can just look at the girls, have a drink. If you don't want to pay for anything, that's completely fine. So I was like, okay, you know, what the hell, why not? And then I go into that place and then I sit down on the sofa and the girl comes up to me, starts talking to me and she's very flirty, very nice, you know, she kind of tries to create chemistry between us. And I'm like, okay, that's cool. And then she offers me a private lap dance in the back. So I tell her, look, I'm not about that. I don't want to do this, sorry, it's fine. And she says, no, no, it's free, it's on me. I think you're an awesome guy. I just want to give you this gift. And again, I was 18, kind of stupid, but I believed her. I was like, oh yeah, make sense. You know, of course I'm an awesome guy. Of course you want to give me a free lap dance. So she takes me to the back and it's like a big round room. And I sit down with her and then maybe 10 seconds later, this other black girl comes in with a tray and a bottle on it of wine. And she asks me if I want some wine and I said no. And then what she does, she pours wine to herself and to her friend and they start drinking wine. And we kind of have fun, talk a bit. Suddenly things get a bit sexual and I'm kind of rooted out because I haven't paid anything. This doesn't make any sort of sense. So I ask them, hey girls, does any of this cost me money? Like, does any of this cost money? They ignored me. And then I ask again, look, does any of this cost me money? They ignored me again. So I just stood up. I was like, look, do I need to pay for anything that's happening here? And the girls basically said, yeah, of course, you need to pay for the wine. It's 1,200 euros. And I was like, look girls, I'm originally from Israel. We don't do that shit. Like, maybe this works on Europeans, but you haven't met any Israelis probably. This won't work. Sorry. So then the girl says, oh, look, we're going to have a problem then. And she goes out and gets this manager girl that comes in with a six foot five monster Hulk guy, super scary guy. And they both enter the room and now there's four of them. And they tell me, look, you have to pay. And I go, no, I don't. I didn't order the drink. I don't drink alcohol. You wouldn't find one drop of alcohol in me for the last more than six months. So sorry, I'm not paying anything. And then the tough guy came, Mr. Frankenstein. And he's like, look, dude, you better fucking pay right now or it's just going to be trouble. It's going to end very bad for you. Of course, I was really scared because I thought he's going to beat the shit out of me. And we kind of went back and forth. And I basically kept stating the truth and just saying the facts of the situation. Look, I came in here, they told me it was free. Nobody said I need to pay for anything. They actually explicitly told me I don't need to pay for anything. I didn't ask for a bottle. She told me I can go in the back with her for free. I didn't drink. Not you can't charge me for anything. And they're like, no, but here's the bill. I'm like, yeah, but I didn't ask for anything. She said it was free. There's no reason I should pay for anything. And then he says, yeah, but the girls rank. Yeah, but I didn't order the drinks. I didn't ask for anything. And then this goes on for a while and they try kind of all sorts of scare tactics, intimidation. So finally I simply asked them like, hey, look, if I don't pay, are you going to beat me up? And the guy just says, look, there's a police station three minutes from here. And if you don't pay, we're going to get the cops and then you're going to go to jail. And for me, that was like heaven because I knew I wasn't guilty. And I knew there were probably that the police know they're crooks. So I was like, yeah, great. You know, I'm not willing to pay. I'm a thief. Sure, call the cops. Please, I beg of you, call them. And basically they started losing leverage and eventually I just realized they were not going to do anything and that they don't have any leverage on me. I just got up, started walking away and then the manager ran to me. He's like, no, no, no, okay, at least pay for the girls. I was like, no, sorry, I'm not going to pay for shit. Got out of there, took a cab, split off. Now the story is a lot more, I talk about it a lot more in my new book, the one I'm writing right now, but that's basically the gist of it. And what actually happened there, it's like in a very extreme case of emotional manipulation, like when your mom tries to manipulate you into not doing something or a sales guy tries to pressure you into buying something. And I want to explain what happened. So the moment that I realized that they're trying to do emotional pressure on me to make me basically buckle, make an emotional decision, I immediately resorted back to the facts and the truths of the situation. So that's step one. It's just whatever the truth of the situation, the facts, you just start saying them and repeating them over and over and over. Let's say, for example, some guy you had a business partnership with decides that you need to, maybe the business failed and he's like, yeah, so now it's because of you so you owe me money and then he does some sort of pressure on you. So you just tell him, okay, we went into a business together, we took the risk together, the business failed and you're asking me to pay you. The business, and then you say again, we went into a business together, the business failed, we took mutual agreements and then you asked me to pay you. Or let's say your mom is like, oh, you need to do this right now because you live her, so you have to do this. So you just repeat the facts. You're like, I live in this house and because I live in this house, that means I have to do what you say. I live in this house and because I live in this, you just repeat at like the most surface, direct level of what's going on. And the reason for that is because when people emotionally pander to you, you always have this balance between being rational and being emotional. So most of the time, most people are fairly rational. So when you're rational, you act through your best interest and your brain can use all the data you've accumulated in your life to basically make the best decision for you. But when you get emotional, let's say you're 50% emotional, that means that 50% of the logical brain is turned off. When somebody manages to get you, basically like in the cases where they try to intimidate me, somebody gets me like 80, 90% emotional, then I know I'm bound to make a really, really, really, really bad decision if I don't handle it really fast. Like, have you ever been in some sort of an exchange or sort of a debate? And then after you kind of said something and then you thought, look, you look back at it and your brain was like, oh, you should have said this. And you're like, shit, if I said that, I would have been the winner. Or maybe you're in an argument and then your brain, after the argument, your brain's like, oh, you could have done this, you could have said this. You were right because of this and literally it gives you the right answer. You're like, shit, if I said that, if I did that, I would have obviously won. So the reason that that's not an illusion, by the way. So the reason that happened is because once the event is over, your brain's logical analytical capabilities come back because you become less emotional. And once you reach a certain threshold, basically the logical brain comes back and you automatically are gonna act in your best interest. And if you argue with somebody who's emotional, because when somebody tries to emotionally pressure you, he has to act emotionally on himself, it's impossible to just pressure somebody with logic emotionally. You have to become emotional yourself. So if you can actually stay logical or return to logic, then what's gonna happen is you become more logical than the person who's emotional because they're trying to emotionally pressure you. So you actually are gonna win the argument. You're gonna be faster and you're gonna be more sharp. As you can see, even four people try to extort me, still when I became rational, it was like 70, 80% rational. I was like, shit, get up, walk away, just do it now. And I just did it and it worked. And I had no doubt it would work because everybody was emotional and I wasn't. I just had to make sure that nobody's gonna beat me up. So how did that work? Again, when you keep, when people try to get you emotional, the thing about emotions is that emotions are passing. There's something that comes and goes. So when you don't feed the emotions, let's say you're angry, you're sad, depressed, whatever it is, when you don't feed the emotions anymore, then it usually takes like what? Like 10 seconds, half a minute, maybe a minute for the emotion to start passing. So these people know that they basically have to take advantage of you as fast as they can possibly do because even if the emotion is very high, it can't last forever. Logic on the other hand is absolute. It's infinite. It doesn't have an expiring date. It just keeps being the right thing all the time. So when somebody tries to pressure you and immediately you can feel your logical mind going down and the emotions going up, maybe it's fear, maybe it's excitement, could be even happy emotions, even that's not too good. What you wanna do is again, keep talking about just the fact of the situation and the truths, don't say anything else. Just whatever people ask you, just say this is the fact, this is a situation and just repeat it and it's easy to know. You can be as emotional as you want, it doesn't matter. If you're depressed in a suicidal manner because you're so depressed, you can still be I'm laying in my room, I'm very depressed, I feel like shit, that is the situation. I'm very depressed, I'm sitting in my room, I'm thinking about my life and that I should kill myself, I'm very depressed. Just repeat it, repeat it, repeat it, repeat it. But the thing is you have to repeat, you have to say it over and over and over again to not allow your brain to go along with the emotion because when you have an angry thought, you're gonna start to have an angry emotion, you're gonna start to have angry thoughts. When you have a scared emotion, you're gonna start having scared thoughts. So by repeating your mantra, which is basically the situation, the truth of the situation, you're both communicating with the other person and you're giving yourself a chance to start recovering from the emotion. Once the emotion subsides, your analytical mind goes up. Once it goes up enough, you'll have the right answer, you'll feel confident, bam, you do it. And then whatever you say or do, you can be confident that it was in your best interest. So if you master this and really it just takes a certain degree of awareness or maybe you just had to be fucked in life enough to not have that happen to you again because now you'll implement this. Once you really, really, really apply this 100% of the time, you'll never, ever have a situation again in your life where you did something and then you regret doing it. The only things that you'll regret doing are things that you did from emotional decisions, not from logical decisions because your logical decisions will always, always, always be the right decisions at that moment because your brain is like a perfect analytical machine that always takes all the data and gives you the best possible solution. It can't be wrong. It's like a calculator. But if you feed it with wrong data because you're emotional, then you can't blame the calculator. It's basically like doing one plus eight, but holding down another number, then you get like a weird result and that way people take advantage of you. So just to summarize, three things you should always, always remember. First thing is that when you get emotional, when you start getting very, very excited in the up zone or when you get in the scared down zones, like sad, angry, maybe scared, anxious, never make decisions in these emotional zones because you're probably gonna regret them no matter how good they look or how scared you are and hopeless you are. Always wait for the logic to come back and you do that by repeating the truths of the situation. Just the truths and the facts. That's it. Just repeat it like a mantra over and over again, either to the person or to you or even if you're alone, just talk to yourself. It's the best thing you can do. And within a minute or two, you're gonna be logical again, at least logical enough to make a decision that's gonna be in your best interest. Second thing is that you never, again, never ever make a decision when you're not rational. Second thing is that you need to remember that other people don't necessarily have your best interest in mind. Remember that even somebody like your mom doesn't necessarily want the best for you. She wants the best for you, but through her values. So what she values, you don't necessarily value. So there's gonna be a conflict. So if you listen to her, you might take advice from her, but if you listen to her and just do what she says, then you're basically almost guaranteed to get the wrong kind of decision. Even your best friend often doesn't know to 100% what your values are at any given moment. So don't let other people make decisions for you from an emotional standpoint ever, because again, they have their interest in mind. I'm not saying they're selfish. I'm not saying try to take advantage of you. I'm just saying they don't look at the world with the same data you have because obviously you know yourself best better than anybody else. Finally, always remember that the facts and truths of the situation are your anchors. Facts and truths will always, always, always be emotions because the truth and facts are absolute. Logic is absolute. While emotions quickly come and go. So if you can stick in there and basically anchor yourself to the ground within the whole emotional storm by using the facts and the truths, you're guaranteed, guaranteed, 100% guaranteed to win because if you don't make a decision until you get rational, which you have to get rational if you anchor yourself, then you will always win. And if it's a time sensitive decision or you have to decide right now or the opportunity is gonna go, fuck it. I don't want that opportunity. There's not a single opportunity in this life that's time sensitive where you have a very limited amount of time to make a decision where you won't end up regretting it. And if you do win, it's just gonna be luck which luck is very bad in this world. Like it's shit because luck makes you feel entitled and makes you think like, oh, this is because of me. I'm special, I make good decisions and then anyway you're gonna lose it later. So I hope this helps you. Basically this is my philosophy for never ever getting emotionally manipulated. It works perfectly. And this is just one of the many, many stories that I talk about in my book that I'm actually writing right now. I think I'll be done by the end of the month. The book is about my job life journey and so far. And all the things I went through in this life and what happened to me, you know, the various different lessons I learned. And I think it's gonna be an amazing read for you and you're gonna love it. But for now, I hope you just enjoy this video. Keep watching, have three more videos to go today and keep being awesome.