 Amen. So Ephesians chapter five, of course, talking about the relationship between Christ and the church there at the end of the chapter and how that reflects on a marriage and the relationship between a man and his wife or a husband and his wife. So this sermon, similarly to the last week's sermon, is going to be a sermon that you're not going to hear too many other places. And ladies, let me just say this, if you haven't noticed, I'm pretty hard on the men in this church. And there's a lot of yelling and screaming and pounding on the pulpit, really directed at the men. And the reason for that is because when it comes to the family, when it comes to the roles in the church and the family especially, the men are the, you know, they have the leadership role. They're the responsible party. So if you're not hard on the responsible party and you're not teaching the responsible party on what to do and how to lead, you know, you're going to realize that things will go south pretty quickly. Look down there at Ephesians chapter five and look at verse 22. And the Bible says, why have submit yourselves unto your own husbands as unto the Lord? For the husband is the head of the wife. Even as Christ is the head of the church. And he is the savior of the body. Therefore, as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. So last week I gave the ladies, the wives a pass. So you have to turn in your pass for this morning's sermon. This morning's sermon is about the submissive wife and how to be a biblical wife according to the Bible. And this is not politically correct today. So you are not going to hear this taught in the world and this is pretty much the opposite of what the world today is teaching. Turn to 1 Peter chapter three. So we see in Ephesians chapter five ladies that you are to be subject, the wives are to be subject to their husbands in everything it says in verse number 24. You say, what does that mean? Well, in everything the Bible says. Now look at 1 Peter chapter three. 1 Peter chapter three, look at verse number five for now. The Bible says, for after this matter in the old time, the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves being in subjection to their own husbands. Now turn to Colossians chapter three. So you are to be in subjection, you are to be a subject to your husband just as Christ, the church is a subject to Christ. It's a direct comparison in Ephesians chapter five and the Bible says in Ephesians chapter five it's in everything, in everything, in all things. But you say, what if my husband who I'm subject to is asking me to do something that's against the Lord or against the Bible? Well look at Colossians 3 18. The Bible clarifies in a little bit more detail in Colossians 3 18. It says, wives submit yourselves under your own husbands as it is fit in the Lord. And this is of course, you know, as it is fit in the Lord. So your subject, we can take these verses together and wives, you are subject, you are to submit to your husband as it is fit in the Lord. You say, well it doesn't say that in Ephesians chapter five. Well it's talking about a direct comparison from the church to being subject to Christ, which means that it's Christ is the Lord. Okay, so as it is fit in the Lord, you are to be submissive, you are to be a subject to your husband, you are to follow your husband's leadership in everything the Bible says. So I mean, what does that mean? I mean, what does that actually look like? Like, wives, I mean, first of all with spiritual matters, it means that you are to follow the spiritual direction of your husband. You know, so as long as, of course, as long as that spiritual direction is in line with the Bible. This is the same concept, by the way, as Romans chapter 13 being subject to the higher powers. So we are always subject to the higher powers and God is obviously our highest power. So we're to, you know, listen to the government, follow the government as long as it doesn't violate what the Bible says. If the Bible, you know, says something that the government is telling us to go against the Bible, then we don't have to follow that command. It's the same idea here as wives being subject to their husbands as it is fit in the Lord or as the church is subject to Christ. So look, ladies, wives, your husband should define the spiritual direction for your family and you should follow it. You should, I mean, it's very simple. Now here's the thing, you say I don't want to. You say I don't like following my husband in certain areas. But here's the thing about, about subjection that you have to understand. Subjection itself means you follow somebody else's way. Means you do something that's not your way, that's somebody else's way. You may agree with it, or you may not. The Bible, I mean, look, if, if you could not be, look, if, if anybody, men or women, you know, cannot be in subjection to anyone in their life, you're going to have a very difficult life. Let me just go ahead and tell you that right now. Because, look, if you, if you can't put yourself, this is for men and women. If you have a man or a woman that can't put themselves in subjection to anybody, you're going to have a tough go at life. Let me, let me tell you that. Look, your husband, ladies, I guarantee you your husband is in subjection to many people in his life. You say, well, you know, I don't think so. Well, I don't care what man is in this room. He is in subjection to people in his life. First of all, if you're coming to church, you're in subjection to, you know, the church leadership and the pastor of the church, you know, that you're voluntarily putting yourself underneath that leadership. You're in subjection to that leadership when it comes to matters of the church. I guarantee every single man in here, whether he owns his own business or not, is in subjection to people in his business that he does. You say, well, I own my own business. Well, don't you have customers? I mean, the customer is always right, right? You're in subjection to your customers. You're in subjection to people you do business with. Look, every single man in here would be a complete failure in his life if he could not put himself under subjection or under authority. So it's not something that your husband can't do, so why can't you do it? So look, your husband's in subjection to plenty of people. You are in subjection, the Bible says, to your husband if you're married. And in his life, he's in subjection to God. Everybody is in subjection to God. So you say, here's what a lot of people will say today. Even Christian churches will teach this today. They'll say, so why can't we both, the husband and the wife, why can't we both be in subjection to God and just have this thing be 50-50? Why can't we do that? Well, here's the reason why. Okay, here's the reason why. It's because the Bible, the Bible doesn't define every specific detail of every specific situation you're going to be in. The Bible gives doctrines. The Bible gives examples of historical stories and different doctrines and philosophies and how God, look, with the Bible, we see the mind of God. We see how God feels towards us and we see how we are supposed to act on this earth. But we must apply the Bible to specific situations in our life. The Bible does not have a specific story covering every single situation you are going to run into in your marriage. You must apply doctrines of the Bible onto the situation. Example, where are you going to go to church? What church in Fresno are you going to choose to go to? The Bible does not have a list of churches in Fresno that in telling you which one to go to. You must apply biblical doctrines onto decisions that you will make in your life. I mean, the Bible does not tell you which homeschooling curriculum to use. The Bible has very clear doctrines and very clear teaching that you should be teaching your children and teaching your children at home. I mean, the Bible does not tell you which standards you will set in place for your family. It gives you the doctrines on how to do that, but it doesn't tell you specifically which businesses and restaurants and places that you should go to and should not go to according to the standards of your family. Someone is going to have to define these types of details. Somebody has to apply these biblical concepts to everyday life and make these decisions. There needs to be a leader and look, no situation, no situation in any organization has 50-50 across the board. Everybody is in charge. It's stupid. No one would even do that. Think of secular organizations. There is not a singular organization out there where everybody just has equal say in everything all the time. It's ridiculous to even think about it. A business couldn't run that way. Somebody has to be in charge. That's why men, when you go to work, you have a foreman and a superintendent and a manager and you have this hierarchy of leadership because even secular organizations have figured out that you can't just have everybody in charge of everything. It would be a disaster. It would be a mess. So look ladies, spiritually, if you have a husband, I mean churches, think of it. Church, even God, the organization that God has defined has specific leadership set up. There's entire traptors in the Bible talking about the organization of a church and who's to lead the church and who's to help the leader of the church and what can be done and what can't be done and even who the leader can be. Can the leader be a man? Can it be a woman? Can it just be anybody? No. It has to be a very specific person with very specific qualifications. So God even understands, of course, understands that organizations need leadership and in the family that leader is the man. So look ladies, if you have a man, a husband, who is leading and choosing the spiritual direction for your family, you have a gem on your hands, first of all. Embrace that. Here's the thing, at least after today, you're going to know what the Bible says and it wouldn't be submission or subjection if it was just all your way. That would be you leading. If it was just everything that you wanted to do all the time and that's what you did, that's not submission. That's not subjection at all. That's leading and the Bible says that's your husband. Let's look at matters of the home. The husband should define the vision for the household. Remember last week, what is his vision for the household? You say you're sitting in the chairs there and you're like, my husband doesn't have a vision for the household. He doesn't have one. Well, maybe you should encourage him to get one. Look at Proverbs 31. You should encourage him and then when you get this vision, his vision for the family, you should support it and get behind it. Look at Proverbs 31 talking about the virtuous woman. Now here's the thing about the virtuous woman. Look at verse 11 of Proverbs 31. We're talking about the virtuous woman, the woman that the Bible is teaching about here that all women and all wives should strive to be the Proverbs 31 woman. Look at what the Bible says about her in verse 11. It says the heart of her husband doth safely trust in her so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. So as your husband is leading the family, let me tell you something about leaders. Every single leader needs people that he can trust. Every single leader needs people he can count on. He needs someone as your husband's leading his family. He needs a spouse. He needs a wife that he knows has his back and that's this man in Proverbs 31. He knows that his wife supports him. She has his back and his heart is just completely trusting in her. As I told you with the leader, you know, last week a good leader will take somebody who's weak and make them strong. That's what a good leader will do. A good wife a good wife will strengthen her husband even when he is weak. That's what a good wife will do and that's what the wife of Proverbs 31 is doing. Look, a bad wife will attack her husband in moments when he is down. Maybe because do you think, do you think as a leader, do you think that your husband is your husband God? Is your husband going to make every single decision in the correct way? No, he's not. He's not. Which means that, you know, he's going to make mistakes. There's going to be times when your husband is up and there's going to be times when your husband is down in his role in leading the family. But look, a bad wife and a wife who is not the Proverbs 31 woman is someone who would attack in those moments. Who would push him down. He would be in a weak moment and she would push him down further. But the Proverbs 31 woman was someone who would take her husband when he was in a down situation and lift him up. You know, maybe, I mean just practically speaking, maybe his business is not doing well. Maybe he did make some decisions in business that just things just aren't going well with the way he decided to go. You know, a good wife would encourage and support him in those times. And guess what? Guess what? As a man who's been down times in his life before, he will remember those times. He will remember this is how men operate. Here's a window into the mind of men. Men operate. First of all, I appreciate the times in my life. Looking back, I didn't appreciate them at the time, but I appreciate the times in my life when I was down. My wife and I talk about this a lot, that we're glad we had those times where maybe finances weren't good. We're glad looking back on those times that we were going through difficult situations. But let me tell you something about men. Men will remember who was with them and who was not with them when they're down. Because guess what? It's easy to be supportive and follow somebody who's just up all the time. That's why you find all these rich celebrities. They just have tons of friends all the time. All these super rich people. They just have tons of people that want to be around them all the time. Because they're up. But look, when people like that get down, there's nobody there. Everybody flees. What's important and how you know who you can really trust. And this is a super important point for a marriage. As your husband leads and he leads through spiritual matters and he leads through supporting the family and he leads through all these situations, there's going to be times where maybe he gets laid off. Or maybe finances are really tough and maybe he can't find a job where he made as much money as he used to make and maybe things are really struggling right now. And let me tell you something, if you're the Proverbs 31 woman in that situation, he will look at you as priceless. Just as Proverbs 31 says. Because that's who you find out. That's who men find out who they can trust. And that will draw him closer to you. This man in Proverbs 31, he knew that his wife was with him through thick and thin, no matter what. Up or down, she's with me. That's where his heart was at. And he's like, and this guy, he's like, keep the rubies. She's priceless. That's what he was like. And that's, look, that's the power ladies that you have. You think, oh, I'm not in charge. So that means that, no, that is a huge role for you to support your husband and to be that force that can prop him up through tough times. That is vision for the family. He is to define the vision for the children. He is to define the vision for their schooling. He is to define the vision for the provisions for the finances of the family. Down to what we eat for supper, your husband can define this level of vision. Help him realize this vision for your family. That's your role. See, the world out there, especially today will tell you to compete with your husband. It will tell you that if your husband is trying to lead your family, that he's being oppressive and you shouldn't put up with that. But look, the things that you do will show your support for his agenda. And for, you know, or you could be bitter at his role and see how that works. And try to take it away from him. That's not what the Bible teaches. That's what the world teaches. This is not like what the world is teaching is not God's plan. It's against it. And look, here's the thing. I don't know how many times I've said this and how many different sermons, but you know, you're best if you just do it God's way. Just do it God's way. Get on his plan and help him with it. If you have ideas, look, if you have ideas, ask him. Ask your husband. Hey, I have ideas. That's support. That's supporting him. You know, don't just take matters into your own hands. You know, it's the same thing, you know, in a church. There's leadership here. You know, you can't just take matters into your own hands in the church. Look, it's the same at home, ladies. If you have ideas, bring it up to your husband. He's in charge. It will show, and that's another thing. That will show your submission to his authority. That will show your, you know, respect for his authority. Look, ladies, it's a heavy burden to be in charge. It is a heavy burden to be in charge, especially in difficult times. Help him with it. And show that you are submissive to him and you are subject to him. He doesn't need to have this burden of leadership and also have a wife that is not subjected to him and competing with him. That's not supporting him. That's weighing him down. Turn to Ephesians 5. I really have two points. The first one is, you know, you're to be a subject to your husband. Period. You're to be a subject to your husband. He is in charge. And as it is fit in the Lord, you are to just do what he says. It's very simple. Help him. Support him. Look, you can be very good at this. And you can help him succeed. Turn to Ephesians 5. My second point is this. It's the verse of the week on your bulletin. Look at verse 33. Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself. And the wife see that she reverents her husband. So the second point I want to make tonight or this morning is that ladies, you are to reverence your husband. Not only you need to be in subjection to him, but you are to reverence him. What does that mean? Reverence. The definition means a deep respect for someone. Look, the position of the husband, of the leader of the family is a position that the Bible says the wife is to reverence. You are to reverence your husband. And now look, it's super interesting because I've heard this said so many times, like just a secular statement that I don't know if you've heard this before, but women desire love and affection, and men desire respect. I mean, I've heard that said so many times, but isn't that interesting that Ephesians 5.33 that statement that I've heard so many times, it's true. Women want to feel loved and they want to feel like their husband cares about them and their husband is focused on them and is affectionate towards them. This is what women want. Men want respect. That's what men want. That's what you will see men hunting their whole life for. That's what you'll see men out in the business world. They want respect. And most men out in the business world, they want respect so badly and it drives them crazy because they can't get it. They don't know how to get it. They're out there and they're demanding that people respect them. This is the boss that gets the job and in two weeks he's saying you have to listen to me because I'm the boss. Don't you know I'm in charge here. You know look, if I have to tell you that I'm in charge here, that means I've completely lost control of the situation. You don't demand respect, but the Bible says that your husband that a wife is supposed to respect and reverence her husband, which is interesting because what Ephesians 533 is telling us is that we're to do these things that our conscience already wants. Our conscience as a man, my conscience wants my wife to respect me. That's what I want. That's what my need is. As a woman, the Bible says my wife wants me to love her. To show my love for her. The Bible is telling us exactly what we want in Ephesians 533. It's actually giving us the medicine to feed what we actually are wired to desire. Does that make sense? So Ephesians 5 means it's another perfect example of the Bible being a miracle. That it just completely fits what we need. But here's what's interesting. Women, you're to respect your husband. Show reverence towards him. And look, this means that you're to do that whether you feel like it or not. Turn to 1 Peter 3. So let me ask you this. Let me ask you this in two ways. First of all, let's talk about your speech. Let's talk about your speech because the Bible actually is very specific on this in 1 Peter 3 and starting in verse 1. Let me ask you a question ladies. How do you speak to your husband? How do you speak to your husband? Do you speak to your husband in a respectful way? Look at 1 Peter 1. Look at what the Bible says here. Likewise, you wives be in subjection to your own husband. Same thing we've been talking about. That if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives. Now, when it says if any obey not the word, that's talking about the husband. We'll get to that in a minute. But it says that there'll be won by the conversation of the wives. While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear, just underline every time there's something that says something about speaking here. Verse 3. Who's adorning? Let it not be the outward adorning of plating of hair and a wearing of gold or putting on of apparel. But let it be the hidden man of the heart in that which is not corruptible. Even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit which is the right sight of God of great, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner, in the old time the holy women also who trusted in God adorned themselves, being in subjection onto their own husbands even as Sarah obeyed Abraham. It says she was in subjection to Abraham. And then what kind of example does it give here? Calling him Lord. Whose daughters he are as long as you do well and are not afraid with any amazement. It's super interesting here that we are talking about holy women that are in subjection to their husbands. And it is almost completely focused on their conversation. It is almost completely focused on how they speak to their husband in 1 Peter chapter 3. The words that these women speak is brought up like five different times in the passage that I just wrote you. It's used as an example as the example in 1 Peter chapter 3 of showing that these women are in subjection to their husbands. Meaning that if you speak to your husband in a certain way, it can be viewed that you are not in subjection to him. Meaning that the holy women who are in subjection to their husbands. Think of Sarah. I mean Sarah, do you think that Sarah in her life, do you think that she did any great things for the Lord? I mean I'm thinking probably. You know I mean she probably did some amazing things for the Lord in her life. But what is the thing that the Bible brings up? The one thing that the Bible brings up about Sarah here in the New Testament is that she was respectful to her husband. She was subject to her husband and she spoke to him in a tone of reverence calling him Lord. I'm not saying your wife needs to call you Lord or you need to call your husband Lord but that is the example that the Bible is using to show that Sarah was in subjection to Abraham. How she what? How she spoke to him. So how do you speak to your husband? Let's talk about how do you speak to your husband ladies. Does this sound like you? That you're just super respectful to your husband as the church is subject to Christ. Is that how you speak to your husband? I mean is that it? Because look I'm guessing that this is the problem with becoming casual with each other by the way. This is the problem as you're married for years and years and years. This is a problem with dating by the way too. A huge problem with dating. These teenagers or young people that date they get too casual with each other. And pretty soon before they even get into marriage this reverence is lost already. It's lost. So I mean back to husbands and wives don't get too casual with each other. Because you know don't act because pretty soon you're going to start treating each other like your roommates and buddies. And the problem is that being too casual first of all being casual in general is pretty much always a bad thing. It's always better to be more formal. Always better. But in a marriage here's the problem with being too casual. If you're just too casual with your wife and the wives are too casual with the husband you know what? You'll start to lose this reverence. Your husband will stop feeling this reverence. And look your marriage will suffer from being too casual with each other and your husband will not even know why he's unhappy with you. But if you're just speaking to your husband like he's your buddy or you know he's like just your friend or something like this and you're getting way too casual with him. He's going to start thinking that you're not reverencing him. You're not being subject to him anymore and look he will not like it. He may not even know why he doesn't like it but he will look at it. He will begin to look at it as disrespect. And ultimately he'll think that you don't appreciate him. You're saying oh just being casual. Yeah I mean just being casual with him like you know you're not ever surprised to see him or happy to see him or anything like that. You speak and the way that you act. Look on the contrary ladies you should treat your husband. You should speak to your husband like he is going out every single day and fighting monsters for you. That's how you should speak to your husband and that will keep that level of respect that you're supposed to have for him. Let me give you an example. When is the last time ladies men relax. Ladies when is the last time for your husband to get home and you met him at the door and you gave him a hug and a kiss and said I appreciate you working so hard for us. How long would that take? I don't know three seconds. When's the last time that you did that? When's the last time that you got up in the morning when he got up early and you got up and you gave him a hug and a kiss goodbye and said thanks for working so hard for our family. When is the last time that you did that? Look those I'm telling you for your husband those are those priceless moments. That will define his entire day. That is where the husband will be like forget the rubies my wife is priceless. The wife that makes that effort to have that type of conversation those type of actions that show that reverence towards her husband. But look it takes effort. It takes effort. It's not just accidentally that that's going to happen. You have to actually have just like it takes your husband effort to show his love towards you. Your husband is not showing love towards you by being to himself like man I really love my wife thinking to himself. No he's going to go out and take some action that shows that love towards his wife. In the same manner also to show reverence to your husband it's going to be some work. It's going to take some sacrifice. Look it takes effort for your husband to lead the home. It takes effort. It's the same thing for you. It takes effort for your husband to find a good church for you. That takes effort to define the boundaries of the family to define standards to support and define the visions that it has for you and the kids. It actually takes effort in the same way to show reverence to your husband. Are you making that effort? Is the question this morning. Are you making that effort for your husband? Because look these things look these things these things are not going to happen on accident. This is what it takes to have a great marriage folks. This is what it takes. I mean you I mean get married forever. Get divorced. I can stand up here. Divorced is bad. But how about this? How about we not shoot for the lowest common denominator. And we actually try to as men do what we're supposed to be doing as men and realize that the Bible what the Bible is telling us to do as men is go out and take some effort that would not naturally come to us if we weren't reading the Bible. Because we have this stupid thing called the flesh that we're burdened with until we die that's pulling us to be selfish and to not care about other people. But the Bible says I should do this so just do it. How about we strive for great marriages and we not strive for just hey I've been married for 75 years and it was a nightmare the entire time. I know people like that. At the funeral they're like they didn't get divorced. They were miserable and they tortured each other for 70 years. How about we try to have great marriages. I mean it's not rocket science but it takes effort. That's the problem. That's the problem. It takes effort on both sides. You may not feel like doing it all the time. You may not feel like reverencing your husband. You may not feel like showing love to your wife but that's what you're supposed to do if you want to have a great marriage. And you know what just as being married to somebody for 50, 60 years and it being the most miserable time you could ever have on any planet anywhere just as that could be the case a great marriage could be the best blessing you'll ever have on this earth. I mean what in the world? Path A, path B. Who would not choose this? But it takes a little bit of effort. Just do it God's way. It's not going to happen on accident. So singles I don't want you to feel left out. So we see that you need to be in subjection to your husband. You just need to follow his leadership. You need to encourage him to lead. If you say there's this big hole right here. He's not really leading in this area. Maybe bring it up in a respectful way and say hey could you help define a plan for us here? I'm really struggling here and encourage him to lead in the areas that he's not. Lift him up in areas where he's weak. Make him strong in areas where he's weak. By supporting him. By having his back no matter what he's going through. Just be supportive of him and be in subjection to him and then show him reverence. It's not a feeling that you have. You're sitting here just like the husband's role. It's not just oh I respect him. No you have to show that. So singles. Single ladies. Let me just say this. Single ladies. First of all your future husband is going to lead you. Your future husband is going to lead you in everything. As it is fit in the Lord. So you need to remember this single ladies. That you don't need to just be out there looking for a pretty face. Or looking for a good job. Or whatever that you think that you should be looking for. Because look you're going to be according to the Bible. You're going to be subject to this person your entire life. And here's a problem with single ladies. Single ladies have this disease or whatever it is. This chronic condition that thinks I can fix anything. They'll find some guy and maybe they really want to be married and they're like yeah but you know he's got a drinking problem or he doesn't go to church and all this. But you know I can fix him. You know let go of this. Let go of this attitude. You need to find one. Here's some risk management for your entire life. Single ladies. Find one that's fixed already. Because ladies they have this idea that they can fix him. And that could cost you your entire life. Because look you're to follow. You're to be in subjection to the person that you marry. You're not in subjection to him yet. In subjection until you marry him. But look. Marrying them and then deciding to not follow them because they're not getting fixed like you thought that they would. That's not an option. That's not an option. Which leads me to you know my last point here is that what if my husband is not doing his job. What if you marry somebody that you thought you could fix and he's not fixable. The point is this you are to do your job anyway. That's why single ladies you need to be careful who you marry. You need to marry your spiritual equal. You need to be equally yoked the Bible would say. Because you are going to be expected to do your job anyway. To be in your role anyway. Notice as we talked about husbands and wives there was never any clause in these statements that says as long as he does his part or husbands love your wives as long as she does this. Or wives reverence your husband as long as he does this. No there's no clause like that. As a matter of fact go back to 1 Peter chapter 3 as a matter of fact quite the opposite is what the Bible says. The Bible actually gives an example of a husband who's not doing what he's supposed to do and tells the wife what she's supposed to do anyway. Look at 1 Peter chapter 3 and look at verse number 1 likewise he wives be in subjection to your own husbands that if any obey not the word. Look this is a husband who's not doing what he's supposed to do. It says if any husband obey not the word. They may also move out the word be one by the conversation of the wives. The Bible here is saying is that hey if you want to help your husband get right if he's not following the Bible you want to help him get right here's what you do. You still be in subjection to him. You still you know have reverence towards him in specifically conversation here the Bible is saying and that that will win him over. That is your best chance at winning him over yet here's what you'll see women do. My husband's not doing what he's supposed to do so I'm going to nag him to death. I'm going to harass him and just tell him all the time about how stupid he is and how he's not doing the right thing and how he's not leading this family correctly and just nag him and nag him and nag him. You know what you're going to end up with? You're going to end up with a husband who's in the woods. You're going to end up with a husband who's in the attic of the house. You say where's my husband well you know he ran away you say he's not doing the right thing he says you know still have reverent conversation still be in subjection to him. You do your job anyway and that goes for the husbands too. That goes for the husbands too. My wife she's not doing her job and she's not being in subjection to me and she's not listening and she's not you know reverencing me like she should be. You still love her. You still show your love towards her. That is your best chance at getting her to get right with God. You do your job anyway. You do your job anyway. Which brings me to finally just the last thing I want to say here. You have to forget and I think that even us even us I can see it in certain places but I think even us in this church as much as we teach separation as much as we practice separation I think that we're still influenced by the world. That's what I think. I think that we're still influenced by the world you know because the world teaches here the world is like the world is going 120 miles an hour against what I'm teaching you this morning in the opposite direction. They're teaching that you need to compete with your husband that you need to have control of your husband. They're teaching this 50-50 which is stupid it never works that way. What they're really teaching is that the woman should be in charge. The Bible says it's your husband. The media I mean in a world I mean just think of the media. Think of the media the world in this media from TV shows to movies to whatever you see on TV or YouTube. It's the man is always the bad guy. The man is the idiot on every sitcom that there's ever been with a family in it. He's a weakling. He's a fool. The man's a fool. He's the butt of all the jokes. All this stuff is a worldly attack on the male headship of the home that the Bible is teaching. It's very effective. Then the woman in all these sitcoms or TV shows or whatever she comes in. She's super smart and she like fixes her dumb husband's mistakes all the time. There's entire shows that are just based on that right there. Every single episode husband does something stupid and super smart wife comes in. But here's the thing folks, it's not about intelligence. My wife is way smarter than I am. It's not about intelligence. It's about the position that God has put you in in the family and the structure of the family. I mean it has nothing to do with intelligence. God wasn't like the women aren't as smart as the men so the men need to be in charge. No. No. He made the man in charge and then he put a support structure in there for him because being in charge takes a lot of support. To the point where if you have no support many times leadership will fail. It's a super important role. I remember there was a news story ten or more years ago and I remember just showing my wife this news story it was a secular news story. It was like a 60 minutes or a date line one of these hour long shows and it was this story about this family it was about this husband and this wife and they were constantly the story was this. It was not religious. It was not based on any Bible doctrine or anything but here he had a husband and a wife who were just constantly at each other's throats and it was this marriage where he had made a bunch of financial decisions that were bad and his wife was constantly beating him down and they were to the point where they were ready to get divorced. Nothing to do with the Bible nothing to do with anything. Just a secular marriage where it was about to fall apart and the woman just said you know what she's like I can't handle it anymore I'm just submitting to his authority. She came to this conclusion by herself and the news story the 60 minutes news story it was like it was just like they had found a unicorn and she decided to just follow everything that this moron you know wants it to do in their marriage and it's like in this story the story works out like the Bible said it would work out these people weren't saved but here she submitted to the authority of her husband the marriage just flipped on its head just like that and like suddenly the marriage was way better and but the news story was still like how could she do this? But you talk to the couple they interview the couple these things are great we're just loving our marriage we're just falling in love again and all that I mean the whole thing and they're just like but she just listens to everything that he says you know the reporters like can you believe this I mean it was just this huge bias story against this because they couldn't believe that some woman would make this decision look that's what the Bible says she just accidentally made a choice that was in line with the Bible and it basically saved her family and all of a sudden his business went around and all this stuff and it was funny because it wasn't the point of the story at all but I recognized it as you know just being the right thing that she needed to do but I mean to the world this is crazy when I'm teaching you this morning when I'm teaching you this morning she just decided to submit and to let him lead and the story was just fascinated that they now had a happy marriage you know I mean it was crazy look folks try it God's way try it God's way because when you get outside God's plan it's all gonna come apart when you get outside that plan it's a major theme in the Bible that applies to most things I say from the pulpit here but here's one last thought for you ladies one last thought for you this morning this may shock you but did you know that your husband did not write the Bible you're like what your husband you say what do I mean by that first of all what I mean by that is that your husband did not write the Bible so at any point in your life at any area in your life where you're saying you know what I agree 90% of the time look first of all if you're just doing things that you agree with that's not submission I've already said that and this 10% area I'm just not going to go along with him on your husband didn't write the Bible you're not disobeying your husband you're disobeying God I mean that look you're all saved you all believe the Bible I just want to throw that out there something to just think about you are not in every single area where you are not submitting to your husband by the way I don't think that it's a 5% area I think that if you're not submitting in 5% or 10% of the area you're not submitting at all because you're going along with everything you agree with and then the areas you don't agree with you're not submitting meaning you're not submitting at all because submitting means you know what they want to do it that way I don't agree but I'm in submission to this we're going to do it that way as it is fit in the Lord so your husband didn't write the Bible you're not disobeying him you're disobeying God keep that in mind you know what the Bible says everybody here knows what the Bible says doctor it's not your husband you're disobeying so reverence your husband being in subjection to your husband but look support him it's a hugely important role look if it wasn't an important role ladies and that's another thing that really really irritates me about what the world is teaching because they teach that being in subjection to your husband is some low thing no no the woman who is supporting her husband the children and teaching the children and putting this look she's saving the next generations she is she is sealing the next generations of Christians in this world what is the most important thing to you husband and wife it's probably your children it's probably that they grow up and they get saved and they have children who get saved I mean this is what a supportive wife who's in subjection to her husband's vision will produce it's impossible for a man to go to work every day and support his family and lay out a vision and have a wife who won't support that vision and get generational results it's impossible it's a hugely important role there is nothing low about it you can argue that it's the most important role that she's at home and she is the one that's going to make those generational decisions and she's going to do that work and that labor of carrying that vision through to the next generation look it's huge that's why Proverbs 31 says it's far above rubies it's priceless is what the Bible is saying you are priceless to your husband but you have to do it God's way let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer