 Well, hello and welcome to understand men now. I'm Jonathan Asley of JonathanAsley.com and I'm so excited to be shooting this short video for you today. Our topic, what makes younger men fall for older women? Really quickly, before we get started, if you post a question on this particular video, one person is gonna get a very special surprise for a free gift. So post a question and then after a little bit of time I'm gonna reach out to one of you and give you a free gift. All right, something special from Jonathan. Okay, why do younger men like older women, okay? This was a question that was posted to me on a recent video and I wanna lean into this for a little bit because I actually had the privilege of talking to some young men about older women one day. In fact, this was back when I was in the insurance business and I used to recruit and train younger guys and I was actively dating after my divorce and I got into it asking questions because they were telling me how they actually appreciated dating older women. Now, before I get into that, I wanna make a kind of an observation because I know a lot of women feel like they're too old to be dating. I get this comment specifically in the area of when they are, this is for folks in midlife. For those that are in their 50s and 60s, they see a lot of men who are on dating sites and they're asking, they're seeking younger women, okay? And I wanna talk about this just for a second and to lean into this because a lot of judgment is centered around this idea of age and there's age discrimination. And what's so fascinating to me is women discriminate in their 50s and 60s just like, man, I know a lot of women in their 50s, 60s don't wanna date men their own age. I've heard the term, I don't wanna become a nurse, I don't wanna become a purse. So there's age discrimination going on in both sexes. Oftentimes men seek younger women from that physicality perspective. In addition, they also seek younger women oftentimes because they have less baggage associated with their life. And I hate the term baggage. Let's just call it luggage and just think that sounds a little nicer. But that could be a couple of reasons why and I can understand why a lot of women are frustrated and they also, many of you might, some of you are watching this might be feeling like I'm too old to even date. I don't want older men and I'm too old for younger guys but I'm here to say that a lot of ladies get attention from younger guys. So I wanna talk a little, I'm gonna go into a little bit deeper of why would a younger guy be interested in older women? And as I shared with you a moment ago, I was talking to a few of my colleagues back in the insurance days. And it was interesting to me. So these were 20-year-olds who are actively seeking 40-year-old women. These men, I'm sorry, they're mid to late 20s actively seeking women in the early 40s, even mid 40s, maybe even 50s. And what was one of the guys said that was fascinating to me was that one of the benefits of dating an older woman is you don't have to worry about getting her pregnant. Oftentimes, these older women already have children and they didn't have to worry about the idea of getting someone pregnant. So they could have all the sex they want with someone and not have to worry about getting them pregnant. So that was number one. Number two was they said older women are really horny. They love to have sex. So women in their 40s and 50s have a very high sex drive compared to women in their 20s. This was the perception of some of the guys I was talking to. I thought that was fascinating. In addition, they tend to be, he also said, women that were older with younger men, these were from the male perspective, said that the women tend to be more appreciative. They tended to be more appreciative. Okay, in other words, women, so men dating in their own age bracket, they're worried about getting them pregnant, some of them don't have necessarily a sex drive yet because I've been told that women's sex drive really kicks in when they're in their 30s and 40s. And the women of their own age don't appreciate the guys. So a lot of younger guys will go seek out older women because they're being appreciated for their efforts. There is one more thing I'm gonna share with you in a minute, but I'm gonna tell you one of the downfalls that a lot of guys say is dating older women is that they also, the women who are older have a built-in shame going on inside of them in the senses that they're not shame, that's not the right word. It would be more fear, fear of rejection because as they get older, they're afraid that the guy will leave. So that causes a barrier in the relationship. That causes a woman not to be fully engaged because she's afraid he's going to leave, so she's holding back. And I've heard that from guys, tell me that they've noticed this facet happen to them. And on some level, that's a very fair fear. That's a very big fear because the truth is, I'm gonna tell you what they said was the main reason why they wanted to date older women was they literally could get all the sex they want without all the baggage and complications and they have a built-in exit clause. Bum, bum, bum, they have a built-in exit clause. And what they said, these were the guys who told me, is that they said they can spend all this great time sowing their oats with these older women and then they get a chance to say, hey, I've gotta move on because I'm gonna find a woman that I can have children with. So they have a built-in exit clause and no older woman is gonna begrudge a guy for wanting to start a family with someone. Now, does that mean men do this, these younger men do this disingenually? Not necessarily, what was interesting is with the guys who shared this with me, it was more, I had to uncover this because it was under the subconscious of what was going on but that built-in exit clause is there and that's what I wanna protect you ladies from is to recognize that while most men are good guys, they're not disingenuine, the one of the challenges of being with a younger guy is you're gonna have to risk the fact that he might leave for a woman he could start a family with. Listen, I'm not here to judge whether you choose a younger guy or not, you just have to be aware that that could be an exit clause for him. So before you give your heart away to a younger guy, just recognize that this might be a fun experience but unless you two are truly aligned in your life vision, you can blend lives together, you share the same values, you have good healthy communication skills with one another and you have chemistry, it's gonna be a real big challenge because the age difference for the guy who wants to have a family is gonna become an issue and not every guy wants to start a family but just know that that could be his built-in exit clause, whether he knows it or not on a subconscious level it could exist there and that's what I wanna caution you on the younger guy and the older women. Hey, I was in a relationship once with a woman who was 10 years older than me, great relationship but that age became a barrier at some point only because there was kind of differences between us because there was a full, almost there was a decade but almost a generational difference and it did cause friction in our relationship and while I loved her and adored her dearly, not that age was the deciding factor but it's better to find people that you're more aligned with because that has the greatest chance for success and I mean the closer you're on age, the better chances you have. It's not an absolute but that's my invitation for you. Okay, I hope you got value from this video, don't forget if you ask a question, I'm giving a special gift to someone it's gonna be about understanding man speak so for that one special person, post a question, let's get a conversation going and I'd love to give out this free gift to one of you. Maybe two of you, we'll see. All right, I'm gonna wrap up this video as I always do first giving myself a big gigantic Jonathan Bear hug. I'm gonna give you a big gigantic Jonathan Bear hug. Oh, my Bear hug is of self love. I'm gonna ask you to turn to someone and give them a hug as well because hugs are a great source of love and we can all use love in our lives. Thanks so much and wishing you a super duper wonderful day. Bye bye now.