 Hi, she was seven. I'm back. Okay, so I had a video request today, so I'm gonna cover this topic Okay, there is a successful lady and She makes good money and she asked me to make a video about how to act and treat men As a successful woman so that they don't get turned off, you know Because she was probably doing a lot of things wrong To turn off other successful people to turn off other successful men It's not the same dynamic. Okay, if you're successful and the man you're dating is successful It's a whole nother game. Okay, you're going to have to dial back Okay, and a lot of women don't like to do this. That's why they can't date other successful men They have to go down or they have to be single so the one thing that a lot of successful women do is They're overly Overly bossy Okay, they're so used to talking to colleagues employees People under them that their tone actually comes off as like bossy So you have to change your tone, you know when you're at work. You have to speak direct Loud, you know or just Blah blah blah blah blah like this. Hi. How are you blah blah blah? But when you're around a certain man, they like feminine voices So you're gonna have to lighten your voice and soften it. Okay. That's another one light and soften your voice Okay Calm down Calm down Lighten and soften your voice Smile smile. Okay, because I know a lot a lot of times in business. You're not smiling at work You're not smiling all day at work or you're not smiling, you know all day But if the man feels you're happy when you're with him, he's gonna feel You know, like he's impressing you and that he's pleasing you so you have to always be smiling like And You know gotta laugh at all his jokes, even if they're corny You have to act like he taught you something new that you never knew Because men like to feel like they impress you so you have to act impressed a lot like if they're if they have a lot of money if they have a good job or Own their own business is a nice car nice watch nice jewelry They are wearing that stuff for you. They are showing these items for you They're showing them to you to say look I'm successful. I'm I'm a great catch Anyone would be lucky to have me look at all these things I have okay So first off you have to acknowledge that you can't act snooty and be like, oh, I'm just so used to this you know, if you're already successful you have to Compliment them on their success, you know as another successful person You should recognize that and compliment them congratulate them on all their success and how it's so good to see a man who has good taste is Smart You know Love the finer things in life You got it like just boost up his ego all the way, you know, you got to tell him you admire him That's what men want to hear They don't want to hear about your job. They don't want to hear about what you have accomplished They don't want to hear About all the things that you've done because to them it don't matter. Okay to them It's just competition. They don't want to compete with you. They want to impress you So you act impressed. Okay, even if you're not like dang and my last boyfriend had more to you You just act. Okay. Half of women's life is acting. Okay You have to play so many roles. So you got to play a mother You got to play a girlfriend. You got to play wife. You got to play sister. You got to play cousin, you know You're gonna have to play all these roles. So When you're with a man Play the role. Okay. Now You know never Never try to pay for anything because that's gonna make him feel like You're trying to compete with him. Okay Never pay for anything when you're with a very successful man. Okay, let them pick up the check Okay, never open your own door. Let them open the door. Okay You know Let them Be your hero, you know, if you're at a restaurant and you need something from the waiter or the waitress You ask him to ask the waiter to get it for you. Okay, you don't wait You know, you don't do that You tell him your problem and he will come to your rescue. Oh my gosh I need some ketchup or I need some hot sauce or I need another refill. I need another drink waitress You know, let him do that A lot of women will just Do it out of you know, I automatically because they're used to doing that But let him help you let him do things for you. That's what they like. They like women that Need them. Okay So Let them come to your rescue For whatever, you know what I'm saying like if you valet parked Give him your valet ticket and say, could you please give this to the valet? Don't walk ahead and say here about a you know my ticket to and See which one he car he gets first if he gets your car first He's a gentleman, you know, or you know, if you can give him to him at the same time, whatever But he usually they'll say get hers first, you know, so You let them do things for you see if he pays for your valet, you know, I'm saying if you arrive separately But you know But you have to let go of that competition You have to let go of trying to not act impressed You have to let go of saying I can do all this stuff for myself. Why I don't need you You have to let go that mentality if you want to Keep a successful man and you're successful because think about this. There's a girl out there who doesn't have a job Living in a one-bedroom apartment That he will drop you for in a second because she she knows how to make him feel like man. Okay. Oh My god, I love your car. It's so nice. Oh my gosh. I never rode in the car like this before Automatically his ego is boosted, you know. Oh my god, you know, I love this restaurant. It is so good. Oh my god But they I need another drink Waitress, you know, oh my god, you're so smart and ha ha ha ha ha, you know They're gonna do what they need to do to get they weren't okay So they're going to be more adamant about making him Want to see her again, you know, like oh my god. I had such a good time with that young lady She made me laugh. She was funny. She liked all my stuff Dang, I just felt like 10 feet taller with her, you know She just gave me compliment after compliment and made me feel good about myself She was so fun. I'm gonna call her next week I'm gonna call her to go out again, you know now You got with a woman who's successful and independent And she did all the wrong things the guy's gonna be like, yeah, every time I was telling her about something She would tell her story about something that she also did that's equal or better Every time I talked about my business, she would talk about how she's gonna start her business and Or how she is doing at work. Okay, and then every time I You know, I drove up in a nice car and had a nice watch and dressed up really nice for her She didn't even acknowledge it So now he's thinking she's boring. She doesn't appreciate me. She'll make me feel good about myself She's just a competition So even though she might have good credit, you know, a good job a good paycheck She's not fun to be with she doesn't make me feel good about myself and She's kind of boring because I Have to sit there and listen to her stuff all day that I don't care about, you know So The less you talk about yourself the more you talk about him The better chances you are of getting, you know, a second date a third date, you know It has to be all about Him and then when you Get him hooked Then he's gonna start asking you about things like so what do you want to do? Like what are your goals? Like what what can I help you with? You know, then he's gonna start asking you. What do you want? Like how can I make you feel as good as you made me feel, you know, do you want to go on a trip? Do you want me to take you? Shopping or something like that, you know You're not gonna get any of that if you're his competition If you're always trying to one-up him if you're not letting him help you in any way if you're Tone is bossy if you're not acting impressed. He's not gonna call you back. He's gonna like You know, I just might as well drive a Honda So, you know, you got to act impressed. I When I first met my husband And I was asking him what kind of car he drove and all that blah blah blah When we went outside and I saw his car, I was like wow, you know That's nice So I think he liked that. He knew I liked that car. Okay, so he was and I was like just hopped on it And I didn't hesitate. I'm like and He put the top down, you know It was a convertible and I was like, you know, my hair real you can put it down go. He is not gonna fly off Then I had a sense of humor with them so he was laughing, you know and the only thing rude that I told him you know was that I didn't like his music and Since He was trying to impress me. He needed to get some music that I liked and then everything would be fine That was like my only complaint and he's like, okay, well Let's go get some music. But y'all already know that story. But anyway, so you have to give people Their props, you know, they have worked hard to earn their success They want a woman to recognize that men do not become successful just so they that women can't ignore them Okay, that's not why they do it. That's not why they drive nice cars That's not why they wear nice clothes nice cologne and wear expensive watches They do it for us and we need to acknowledge it We don't have to be all stupid over it, but we need to acknowledge it, you know And I know women say what I do the same thing. How come they won't acknowledge it to me If they're acknowledging your success and all your stuff, you know That means that they are trying to figure out how they can get you To help them. Okay, if they're more successful than you, you know, they have better things than you So they're trying to upgrade you Not hear about all the things that you have that they've been there and done that with, you know what I'm saying So if the man is more successful praise his stuff. Oh, you know, I one day I want you know, I want that so bad. He might gift it to you know You don't say oh, well, I have this, you know, that's competition never compete with a man You don't want to be a man's competition. A lot of married couples Do this, you know, they compete and the man ends up cheating with some hoochie-hood rat You know ratchet With all the names for these type of women, you know Whatever because He makes You know, I mean not he makes she makes him feel like a man while the other lady his wife Makes him feel like he has to compete Doesn't work that way. So Never tell a man how much money you make either, you know, give him the lowest you can go without being too obvious and always compliment them That's what they need. Okay, they need to feel like They're impressing you and in return and they're gonna give you whatever you want. Okay They're gonna give you whatever you want because you make them feel good, okay I feel like a lot of women feel like they shouldn't have to do this and we're this and we're that but if you're trying to play this game and you want a successful husband who's not gonna be your competition and Who's not gonna go looking for somebody to make him feel like a man because you can't Then you need to dial it back. It's not about, you know, I'm a woman. I can do whatever I want It's about do I want to marry a successful man and have him feel like I'm not his competition Or do I want to marry somebody broke that I gotta take care of so he can give me all the praise like I'm supposed to give The guy that's very successful, you know, you're trying to switch roles. You have to keep the gender roles, you know, if If he wants to be the leader Head of household blah blah blah blah. Let him don't say I want to be your equal Because then you have to pay half the bills. Okay say I I want you to be a head of the household I want you to take care of everything. I trust you. You're successful So I know you know what you're doing, but have your little secret stash, you know Have your Have your secret stash. Have your money. Whatever you need just tell him what he needs to hear, you know Running the household all that means is you're paying the bills. Okay Because women can get whatever they want out of me anyway They don't run much of anything just let them think they're running it. Okay, my husband thinks he runs the household But you know, if if I say I don't like like if we're gonna purchase something big if he's wants to buy something I'll I'll tell him I don't know about that, you know, like I act like I'm disappointed not like oh, you can't get that I'm not gonna say. Oh, no, you can't get that now a woman who paid half the bills. She'll say that you can't get that Or you shouldn't get that and then he would feel like dang I work hard. I can't buy what I want But if you don't pay nothing and you say I don't I don't know about that, you know He'll listen to you because you don't have you're not telling him. He can't buy it You just saying you don't know how you feel about that And he was like, well, why I'm like, well, you know, I think it would look tacky I think we should hold out and find something different You didn't say no, you just say you don't know about that, you know But if you had some money and you was paying all these bills you'd be like No, I don't think so and he would feel belittled like a child like no, you can't have that toy so you got to be careful how you talk to men ladies and a Lot of women do this unconsciously and wonder why their men cheat or leave or divorce them because they feel like They are being treated like children There's a difference between women and men a lot of men say well, I don't want to I don't want a child I don't want a woman to be a child to me But women often date older men. Okay, so it's not the same. It's like, okay You're older than me. You can teach me things. I admire you. I look up to you. I respect you It's not a child and you know relationship. It's Respect there's a difference. Okay But when you're with a woman your same age and she's paying half the bills She's going to treat you like a child because she cannot Respect a man that can't pull all the weight and she has half to say so She can say he can do this or he can't do that, you know Because she has half to say so and if he goes against her his life is hell You know, she might go out and buy some something expensive and can't make half the bills this month And he gonna have to Struggle to get it, you know, because she's gonna start playing financial games And this is the number one cause for divorce financial games finances money So if you don't have money If you're in a competition with your husband or your mate or your partner or you know, whoever you're dating It's not gonna last too long, you know Somebody gotta be the leader. Somebody gotta act like they're following act is the key word. Okay? Women have been doing this for centuries. It's called acting. Okay? They always have a plan B an ulterior motive they got what they need stashed away the smart ones do and They will play the role to get the lifestyle that they want. Okay, because eight hours a day Eight to twelve hours a day that man is at work. Okay, you are free to do what you want to do Eight hours or plus a date if you work some home if he if he's just rich and don't have to work You can go shopping, you know, you can do all these good things, you know, he'll give you more If you're Respectful Happy to be there Treat him like, you know, he's all that versus his competition, you know, if you're trying to compete with him. Oh Well, I can do this and I I have a meeting this morning and I have to fly out tomorrow and I have all these things I have to do. I'm trying to get this promotion. You know, you're not focused on him anymore you're focused on your career and you're making him feel ignored and That's why a lot of successful men don't date Successful women because they get put second or last, you know So you gotta think about that like if you have all these things going on, don't talk about it Just like, oh, I gotta go into the office sweetie. I'll be back What do you want to do for dinner? You know, don't talk about all your problems and business and like you're so all that over him Because he don't have much going on, you know Just say oh, I'm gonna be back. What do you want for dinner? Play the role then when you get there you be the boss be the boss woman. Okay, you gotta play roles women are Given many roles in their life and if you can play them correctly, you can get what you want. So you just have to master Acting to get what you want. Okay, it's very simple A lot of women make the mistake of Becoming their man's competition and that is the number one thing that turns them off. My husband was married before I'm his second wife. Yes. I'm the second wife he was married to a very successful lady and He said that They divorced because she Was his competition. She always wanted to outdo him. She said he couldn't do this She said he couldn't do that because she was paying half the bills. Okay? so He wanted to do something and she said no he wanted to buy something and she said no he said Deuces I'm out Bought what he wanted did what he wanted and became even more successful than her She was holding him back by trying to control what he was trying to do because she was his equal Okay, so it didn't work out then it probably not gonna work out for other people either If you are in competition and you know able to say yes or no to your Spouse because you pay half the bills. That's not right. You should not put limits on someone's Potential, you know if they want to do some let them go do it, you know so world story is Like his wife Was like high high up like she worked for like this big company She made more money than him. Okay He thought he hit the jackpot until he couldn't do anything and then he left and he came and found me and Now he makes more money than her Why because he had the freedom to do as he wanted and he didn't have any woman Telling him he couldn't spend his own money and he couldn't do this and he couldn't do that He became the leader of his household. He had a woman that was impressed by him. He had a woman that Told him that oh, I like your car. Oh, I love that the car that his wife said he couldn't have Oh, I like this. Oh, I like that, you know So it worked out, you know now we got two kids got a nice house, you know everything He feels like a man. He pays all the bills and no halfs. He's over here, you know, so He can walk around his head high go by whatever he want to buy and Bring me gifts as well. Okay, so that's what you need like when I first met him You know, I was I was a professional But I didn't want to work anymore. I was done with that life So I downplayed, you know my profession I downplayed my job I didn't even talk about work and But about two seconds to let him know that I had to go to work and then he told me not to go and I was like Bye, I'm not going. You're right, you know, he when someone tells you not to go to work And they got you you listen, okay, that means look I'll take care of you So I you know if they have money, you know, they tell you not to go to work and they don't have a job Don't listen to them. But basically He didn't want a working woman he didn't want a woman That was his competition. He didn't want a woman to say no, you can't buy this car He wanted someone that would appreciate him let him be himself and press, you know impress her and You know do things for her be her hero That's what he wanted but he couldn't be that with his first wife because it was a competition. So Successful ladies you got to act Like your career is not the most important thing You're not in competition with him the less he knows about it the better, okay You got to talk up his ego make him feel like a big man They can feel like his accomplishments are all this and that and you can probably keep a successful man, but remember When y'all get into arguments you can't Say, oh, well, I make more money than you or I make a lot of money. I don't have to be here You know, blah, blah, blah, you can't throw that up in his face either Because it's like you're doing all this acting for nothing and then when you get mad and become over-emotional You tell him the truth anyway, so you got to bite your tongue. You got to be strategic Okay, you never tell him nothing You are a mystery Men already know women lie. They want to hear the lies. Okay, so I'll see y'all later. Bye