 one fear, put him in the vortex of his own nightmares. That's the story of Lighthouse 12, taken this week from the files of John Steele, adventurer. Hello friends, this is John Steele. If you like yarns with a briny flavor, this week's tale will be right up your alley. It's a chapter from the life of a young friend of mine I grew to know quite well, shortly after he'd been discharged from the Navy. I know he's anxious to tell you this story, because he feels as I do, that was a period in his life which showed him the importance of looking a problem squarely in the face. I first met Peter Rawlings when I was running a supply cutter for the Coast Guard along Portland Bluff. And, but let's have Peter tell you about it himself. Pete? I guess plenty of guys came out of the war with uneasy thoughts that seemed too unimportant to talk about. Things a man just tries to work out by himself. That's the way I felt. Would have embarrassed me to make a big thing of it. My application for the Lighthouse course at Coast Guard School came through right before I got out of the hospital and I figured this is all blow over as soon as I got on a new job. Night doesn't last forever, that's the way I saw it. Jan had been writing, asking me when she could come see me, but I kept putting her off till I had this thing all squared away. Not that she wouldn't have understood, Jan's a bright girl, but being a woman, she'd have worried. But when she came up to school the day I finished the course, it didn't take much convincing on her part about getting married right away. My orders had come in that there was nothing holding us back so we got married at noon and took off right away for Lighthouse 12. The inlet was smooth as a baby's chin. Pete, I see it. Where? Look, over there. I don't see it. Oh, yeah. Can't we go faster? Why don't you hurry? Aren't you anxious to see it? Well, sure. Well, come on then, make the spray fly. Okay. Love that on my face. You think you give us a man-sized bolt instead of this? What? Nothing, Dan. Pete, come on, you're slowing down again. We're almost there. Well, let's step on it. Right. Hold on. You sure are. This is a lighthouse. Wait a minute, I can't hear you. Throw me that line, will you? This one? That's a girl. Good. All right, now watch it. Slippery. Oh, darling, look at it. Yeah. You like it? Yes. It's so by itself. Independent sort of. I mean standing out here so far from everything. Yeah. It's different than I thought. Disappointed? Oh, no, it's lovely. So why you then? Independent. Hey, you're not acting like a female at all. What? It's your new home, Mrs. Rawlings. Don't you want to see the inside? I'll beat you inside. Hey, hey, now wait. Well, catch me. Think I can't, huh? Trying to run home to mother-all. Hey, wait, let go. Now who's master of this family? You're running your back. Put me down. Oh, no. Gotta carry my bride over the threshold. Oh. Well. This is it. Cute. Cute, she said. Come here, men. Where? In here. What? I don't see anything. A bay window. Pete, it's enormous. Yeah, it's big, all right. It'll be like sleeping in the middle of the ocean. Yeah. It's really swell, honey. We'll see the water first thing in the morning and last one. Sure, it's fine. Oh, now I'll show you something. Can't be better than this. The beacon. Come on. Oh, sure, I've never seen one close, too. Let's see. Now the stair should be around here. Yeah, here they are. A furnished parachutes coming down. Almost there. It's neat. Like it. It's really something. Bother you, being up so high? No, except for the water, of course. What about the water? It's so far away, you can't even hear it up here. Oh. You happy, Princess? I approve of honeymoon. Not much of a honeymoon stuck way out here. It's ideal. Just you and me and the ocean. Yeah, I guess you're right. The weather was fine and calm most first couple of weeks. Even got so I could enjoy watching the sun chase itself over the quiet little waves rainbowing up around our tiny island. The few ships passing our area hardly caused any swell, peaceful, and we were happy as a Christmas tree. Jan, puttering around, planting things and fixing up the place. Me, learning the tricks of the new beacon, doing odd jobs. The job actually ran itself. At first, I kept the ship to show a transmitter open all day for weather reports, but gradually I got so I just listened in on the regular scheduled dispatches. The United States Coast Guard weather forecast, 12 a.m. Jan, come here. Hi, what's up? I'm going to pick up visitors. Visitors, hey. Who is it? Don't know. Yeah, it seems to be. I wonder who. What's the? Yeah, it's around, that's why. That's it then, supply cutter. Oh, sure. Labnoit. You're just in time for lunch. Well, look now, I see. Oh, there's loads. I'll get it ready while you two unload. She's the boss, you know, Mr. Steele. Don't let him get away, Pete. He's going to mash the potatoes. Now I know you're staying. That's usually my job. Oh, here, let's get this stuff off. This is your first lighthouse? Yeah. What do you think of it? Oh, it's OK. Not exactly what I'd expected. Why? What did you expect? Oh, I don't know. Thanks for one thing. You've only been this inlet snow for its heavy weather. It is, son. Just give it time, son. You'll get your fellow storm soon enough. Yeah, I'm sure you're right. Just leave it here on the dock. Say, Mr. Steele, those storms you mentioned, how soon? Well, let's see. This is November. Should be setting in pretty soon now. Big breakers, huh? You bet. Biggest I've ever seen. Well, I remember one night I had a 40 degree roll over by the bluff over there. Well, we'd better not keep Jan waiting. No, no, better not. Come on, I'll toss you for the potato masher. It's quite a moon. Wish Mr. Steele could have stayed longer today. He's nice. Well, he has other stops. I know. You know the sound of the breakers on the rocks. Yeah. But it's good swimming. Honey, let's. What? Go swimming. It's swell at night. Oh, you go ahead. I don't feel like. Oh, it's no fun alone. What do you say? Well, September is pretty late. Oh, you're a sissy. Oh, I just don't think we should. Janet doesn't look safe. Scared to get your little feet swept? I'm not scared. Of course you're not. Just don't like it, that's all. It's OK. Mountain out of a molehill. Forget it. Oh, look, baby, if you really want it. It's not that important. Yes, it is important. Peter, I really don't. We're going in. Get your suit. Come on. We're going in the water. I'll be right there. Hurry up, it looks marvelous. I'm coming. Want to die from here? Looks pretty jagged. No, it's perfectly all right from this ledge. Well, say, don't you think the dock is a lot safe? The dock's no fun. It's too calm. You know, I was thinking maybe we ought to wait. What for? Well, if this wind keeps up, it might rain. That little wind isn't anything. The moon's still out. Yeah, well. Honey, stop shivering. It's not cold. Who's shivering? Well, you ready? OK, you go first. All right, here goes. Yeah, looks good. You don't know what you're missing. Yeah, sure, I think I'll grab a quick smoke first. See, I told you to go. Not too cold, you big sissy. I've come to get you. Oh, OK, OK, I'm going to go in. You're less diving together, holding hands. Oh, now, look, I don't need you. Oh, no, it's fun. Come on, take hands. That's crazy. It might be dangerous. Oh, here, give me your hand. I, uh, come on, try it. Jan, I don't think. Here, here, there. It'll go, will you? Now, when I count three. No, Jan, I'd really rather. One, two, three. I've had enough. I've got to. I'm getting out. You don't. Hey, now, don't. Oh, you get away, huh? No, don't. Please. You're coming home to mother, huh? Jan, let go. No, he's out of this family. Jan, stop it. Jan, let go. Stop it. Stop it. All the next day, and I didn't blame her. A couple of times, I tried to get up the courage to tell her what the score was. But when I'd start to say it, I'd see the red cut my ring had made on her cheek, and the words stuck like cotton in my throat. I was pretty miserable, and I knew life didn't look so rosy to her either. She just yelled at me. You're gotten mad, but she didn't say a word. I'd hit her, and she couldn't figure out why. At the dinner, I made up my mind, and she had to know. Need any help? No thanks. A lot of dishes for one small girl. Got a clean towel? You don't have to. I don't mind that. You've got the rough part. No dish pan hands for Peter. Want me to wipe the soap off your ear? It doesn't bother me, thank you. It's becoming. What? Soap on your ear. Jan, finish that later, will you? Pete, don't keep it. Please, there's something I want to talk to you. Won't you sit down just a minute? It's important. Well? I want you to know about last night. Is there anything to know? Honey, it wasn't you. I slept. That's interesting. What I mean is it was what you were trying to make me do. It still doesn't make the sense. Wait, wait, wait. You see, this goes way back. I've never talked much about the torpedoing. Isn't this the wrong time for sympathy? I'm not asking for sympathy, Jan. I guess what happened to me happened to lots of guys who saw submarine combat. At least that's what I keep telling myself. I don't know if it had been sneaking up on me or if it was the torpedoing that did it. See, I wasn't hurt when we were hit, not then. Maybe if I'd got knocked out right off, I wouldn't be like this. Like what? I was aft that day working on the screw shaft. I knew something had happened, but I didn't know what till the emergency whistle went off. I started for central control fast, and just as I reached the forward hatchlighter, a noise behind me made me spin around. Go on. The side seam was ripping wide open, slow like, like a crazy, laughing mouth. Heavy sea was plunging in at me, around me, over me. I scrambled for the ladder, but the water was too fast for me. It kept dragging me back. I got hold of the top rung, finally, and held on. My fingers were numb from the cold water and the strain. The waves were throwing my legs around like old newspapers. I tried to haul myself up by my hands, reach up to the hatch, but the pull of the water was too strong. It splashed over my face, and I began to choke. It couldn't get my breath. My head was as far back as it had gobbled with my legs beating around like that. It kept drawing me under. Oh, Pete. Must have been about then my legs got broken. Not that I felt any pain. Sort of went out of my head, I guess, before I conked out. You were afraid of the water. Is that what you're trying to say? Yeah. That's a funny thing, though. I didn't realize it until I came to in the hospital. Days there weren't so bad, but every night, those first six months, I was in traction. Foaming mountains of ocean exploded over my bed, let me yelling and sweaty. You don't have nightmares now? No, no. The nightmares went away. The water still bothers you? Hell. Wish I'd known. Oh, honey, I didn't tell anybody, especially dad. See, the men in our family have always been seafaring. I just had to get over it, so. I see. I never got A's in psychology, but I knew the best thing for me to do is to get right back on the horse that had thrown me and make it gallop. Head for the sea. Yeah. Only this was all I could get. The plate in your back? That, and the discharge that read no active duty. You must have hated me last night. If you just told me. I didn't think I'd have to. I thought I'd go away, like the guy had the bed next to me at sick day. What about him? He was much worse off than I was. But he kept the faded old concertina next to his bunk. And when the pain got too much for him, he'd take it out in the squeeze box, hoping it had stopped. But out here, Pete, so far from everything, maybe we should. No, no, no. No, you see, honey, I'm counting on it to fix me up. It's about three, I think. I was, uh, I'm closing the window, dear. We should have air. Well, it's, I'm, I'm cold. Jan, I, if you really want. No. Yeah. Yeah. The nights will be like this all winter, darling. All winter. Don't look at it, Pete. I don't know what you're talking about. Why haven't you better get back? I'll go to sleep. Well, you go to sleep. It's in the hall closet. Why? The end pole under the dock needs, well, it's pretty shaky. It's not your job. Oh, I like banging. I'll do it. But, honey, I don't mind. It's not your job. But won't it bother you, too? Of course not. Well, I just thought. I'll fix it. I tell you I will. That's any day now. I'm going to do it, Jan. Don't worry about it. Well, maybe if we did it together. No. Well, I was just thinking, you could hold it in place with the dock, and I could. No, I can do it. But, Pete, you've been saying that. I'll fix it. Well, it better be done soon, darling. I'll fix it. Now, let me along with you. I'll fix it. Next week, sure. Back to bed, Jan. Come back downstairs, please. Leave me alone, can't you? Well, I hate to see you. I'm okay. I'm all right, I'll tell you. You can't keep on without sleep like this. You'll be sick. Leave me alone. Fancy fixings. Hey, it's a party. Oh, why not? It's our third month of anniversary. Well, how about that? Old married folks. Even old married folks have parties once in a while. You bet they do. Do we dress for dinner, Lady Janet? Oh, quite. Your clean dungarees are laid out, Milona. You want me to light the candles? Yeah, everything's ready. All right. What are we having? Oh, it's a surprise. Oh, I'm going to look. I'll have your ears if you do. I spend all day at this party. I wonder why Mr. Steele didn't come today. Oh, I forgot to tell you. He's bringing the stuff tonight. Oh, he can have to celebrate. Yeah, I spoke to him this morning. He had dungeon trouble or something. You can't get music on the ship to shore, honey. Just a minute. LH-12, give us the weather, will you follow? Pete, please don't. Take a minute. Lightest official weather report. Increasing wind with rain. Provider low and falling rapidly. Wind south to southeast. Keep your rubbers on, Rawlings. Thanks. I'll do that. LH-12, out. Well, it's on the table. What do you say? Very nice, honey. Nice. Why, Peter Rawlings, after all... It's swell, baby. Wait just a minute. I'll be right back. Pete. I think maybe I ought to check the beacon. You know the beacon's all right. Well, you can't ever tell. If you leave me tonight... Honey, this'll just take a minute. Will it? Just a minute. You better be right back. She knew I wouldn't come back. I'd done this too many times before. But a storm was coming and there was that same hollow sickness in me, a need to get as far as I could from the snarling breakers spewing up outside the windows downstairs. I stood with my back pressed against the circular glass of the tower and looking straight ahead and never down. I thought of Jan and her party waiting for me, but I couldn't move. I just stood there tense, afraid to go down closer to the sight and sound of that twisting water. I heard Steel's boat faintly through a lull in the wind. John Steel. He'd have to take me back with him this time. Then I was kidding myself anymore. I'd been on this horse now for three months, but I couldn't make it go. Then I knew I couldn't even get to the mainland. I couldn't even face the trip across. I don't know how long I stood there before I realized it was quiet outside. The wind had led up, but the sky was still a heavy gray. Gray. I'd been in the tower all night. Steel's boat was gone from the dock. Then I remembered Jan's party. Jan. Honey, hey, where are you? LH-12. That's still made up. LH-12, come in over. Jan. Answer me, Jan. Close car calling. Jan. Close car calling. Jan, answer me. LH-12. Jan. Are you getting me? Calling LH-12. Jan. What's LH-12? LH-12. Come in. Come in. LH-12 to Coast Guard. Over. Where you been, man? Things happening upstairs. Low barometer dropping fast. 29-20 power out. He went southeast. Looks rough. Keep your eyes on Zip. Rough. Sure. We'll do. Now your head on, Buster. We got a hurricane on our hand. Hey, LH-12. You getting me? I said there's a hurricane. Yeah. I got you. How is it? Moving fast? Picking up across the Connecticut Valley. You're making him good on a rolling? Yeah, it's okay. Is that all? Yeah, for now. Better keep in touch, though. The wind rushed in like a hungry demon. I put all my weight against it. The lock had broken. It wouldn't catch. I didn't have to look in the bedroom to know the big window had broken loose, too. The whole place was alive. Curtains ballooned against the ceiling. Lamp play like uprooted trees. I tried to push the couch against the door, but the wind was too strong now. The angry water was volcanoing up outside. Breakers 15 feet high. My shirt was ripped, and the wind was cold on my back. LH-12. Coast guard LH-12. Calling LH-12. Coming rolling. LH-12. Coast guard calling. I knew I shouldn't go to the tower, but I couldn't stop. I just raced on up. My footsteps echoed mechanically in the narrow stowell. 5 downstairs had left me winded. There was only halfway up when I had to stop. Catch my breath. I could see better now. Closer to the beacon. Yeah, there it was turning slow and sure. Good old faithful. Dependable. Calling LH-12. I stood there one foot ready on the next step up. I'm in urgent. I'm in urgent. Dependable. LH-12. Come in, LH-12. Urgent. Come in. Lighthouse 12. Coast guard calling. LH-12. Coast guard. Over. Rollins, this is Urgent. SOS from the supply center. Yeah. He's out in that mess. Seems. Help quick. You can reach him faster than we can. Over. My boat is pretty small. Can't you do better with a lifeboat there? All boats out on other jobs. Look fella, I didn't want to tell you, but your wife's on that cutter. Janet. Janet. Rollins, I said your wife's. Where? What direction? Don't know now. Went like this. Steel's radio weren't cold about 10 minutes ago. Better get on your horse, boy. Yeah. On my horse. Little bug was jigging up and down so hard I could hardly grab the mooring line. Big coma's crashed around me, beating at my face. The line scratched hard a steel wire. I tugged at the knot but I couldn't get it loose. I couldn't waste any more time. Jan was out there somewhere. I slashed the stiff rope with my knife. Saltwater stung my hand with a knife that slipped but I kept hacking at it till it gave way. I barely had time to jump in the boat before it was tossed out into the breakers. I crawled back to the stern, found the starting cord, wound it on, and yanked. The sky was black as night. I'd lost my direction bending over the mooring and the beacon swept slowly around and I was headed straight for the reef. A rock shelf gleamed up sharply through the turning light path. I tugged at the idler but the boat heave followed with the great bursting swells. I could hardly see through the panic that gripped me. The light passed on, blotting out the reef but I could still hear it coming closer. The surf getting louder against the rocks. It was sucking me back with long powerful sweeps. Suddenly we seemed to stand still, poised in mid-air. Then a tower of water scooped this up and threw us outward away from the jagged rock and I headed for open water again. I lost all sense of time, just kept going. Pictures streaked through my mind. Jan clinging to an upturned boat. Jan choking and gasping for breath. I shuddered her name into that wild blackness but the wind muffled the words and threw them back in my face. But I kept yelling into the storm. The waves seemed fiercer than ever now but I had to keep going. Fine Jan, had to fine Jan. And then the motor stopped. My hands were stiff with salt and coal but I managed to wind the starting cord. It wouldn't move. I grabbed it with both hands but the thing was jammed. I lay on my stomach over the stern. The water washed over me into my mind and eyes. I tugged at the motor trying to lift it up with the water, held it. A piece of screening was caught in the propeller but it was too far down to reach from there. I'd have to get under the boat to free it. Go down into the water. I crouched against the gunnel trembling. She was broad-sighted now, rocking hard, shipping more and more water by the second. I couldn't go down, not into the water. I'll fix it. I'll fix it now, Jan. Right now! Go under again, Jan. Innings were the storm but I didn't find them. Hurricane suddenly shifted out to open sea and the sun came out. The wind was gone and the loud, ugly waves that had run amuck, with gentle ripples lapping quietly against the side of the boat. A seagull floated by. I stood up and looked across the new bright inlet. I'd have seen them now in that flat calmness. There's no sign of life anywhere. I nosed into the dark and tied up. The door of the lighthouse was still open the way I'd left it. Broken lock jutting out. I stood there on the dock, dreading to go up to the house. A house without Jan. And then a figure tore around the side of the building and Jan was there crying in my arms. Okay, do it, darling. Hey, stop that. Let her cry, Pete. She's been wanting to all night. I hadn't. You had me fooled. Well, when the lifeboat dropped herself and you... Lifeboat? But one of the boats came by from down the coast soon after my engine broke down. Then when we got here, I thought, sure, you'd been washed over the ledge. I was looking for you. Out there in the hurricane? Well, I had to find you. We couldn't believe, uh... Well, that is, uh, we thought... I know. I know. Darling, about last night, I didn't want to go. I understand, honey. Sort of the last straw, huh? I guess it was, but... You're back now, though. Right? For Pete. Well, uh, I guess I'd better call in for a boat. No, don't bother, Mr. Steele. We'll run you over. Might be pretty choppy on the way back tonight. Well, you know, that's my only thoughtful of you, Mr. Steele. Uh, honey, uh... I'd better get our oil skins. Of his own creation. Well, if you like this story, why not visit with me next week? Because I have a man I'm sure you'd like meeting who found himself in a net of political intrigue in the Near East with a mysterious and beautiful woman. I like to call it the Mission. It's all friends until next week. This is John Steele saying, a life of adventure is yours for the taking, wherever you find it. Only don't look for it. It may find you. Well, goodbye and good hunting. Steel Adventurers produced by Robert Monroe directed by Elliot Drake and written by Lois Landau. In our cast were John Larkin, Eva Marie St. and Charlie Holmes. Don Douglas is featured as John Steele. The orchestra was conducted by Sylvan Levin. Remember, next week Mutual presents the Mission, another story of suspense and action from the files of John Steele Adventurer. This is the Mutual Broadcasting System. The Mutual Broadcasting System