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Agbenny talking and Don, I wish you wouldn't give a false impression about the climate in Palm Springs. Just so happens that I was sitting in the sun and it was so hot. I caught this cold panning myself with a florida newspaper The weather is beautiful here. I know Jack But why does the Sun go down so early Don? It comes up in the morning takes a look at the prices and ducks behind the mountains really wonderful here Don There's so much to do Ah, it certainly is Jack and I've been taking advantage of it sunbathing swimming horseback riding Wait a minute down. Wait a minute. You mean you found a horse that could hold you up Well, yes, Jack. I was riding a brown horse. You passed me on the trail Are you shouting for me on a trail? Was that you I should have known first time I ever saw a horse with arch support And a cane yet That horse was so sway back. You look like you were riding a slice of cantaloupe If I told my writers once I told them a thousand times that joke is no good I'm pretty clever. Just think a few weeks ago. There were people who couldn't stand me. Oh, hello, Mary. Hello, Jack. Hi everybody Mary, I've never seen you look so good. You've only been here a week and you've got such a beautiful tan You must have been out in the sun a lot. Yeah, I wish I could find a room Coffee crowded here. You're not kidding. Yes. They I put a penny in a gum machine pull the lever in a woman's sucker head out and said Sorry, no vacancies Mary if we weren't in Palm Springs, I think you were making that up. I didn't believe myself till I saw the sign Yeah, please do not shake machine. You'll wake up the baby. Oh Yes, I I know that gum machine. It's called the juicy fruit hacienda They're booked up until April by the way, Mary. I saw you riding a bicycle down Palm Canyon Drive You look very cute in your sunsuit. Well, thanks Don. You look cute in yours, too What now you walking around the sunsuit that takes a lot of courage Jack, what about a lot of sunsuit, too? Don Wilson is the only guy I know who gets his suntan oil at a filling station Jack, what about you and that corny cowboy outfit? What about you and that corny cowboy outfit? Oh, I looked all right and those high heels shoes you were wearing Wow Well that shows how much you know for your information young lady all cowboys wear high-heeled shoes with open toes. You're crazy Had a cut them. They hurt my feet What a cowboy you should have seen him down swaggering around town with two guns in his belt three ones a cigarette lighter Anyway, Mary when you're in Palm Springs, you're supposed to dress like a tough Westerner some tough Westerner Your first he'll have dough in him from cutting out cookies You ate most of them sisters, so don't be funny. I know what's cooking okay folks the show may be floppin But now Harris is here to start things poppin. So shower me with that son kiss the blow Well, I wish Phil. I wish you wouldn't sneak in here like that. Let me ask you something Why didn't you show up for rehearsal yesterday? Where were you? Well? I'm sorry Jackson You see I couldn't get a room in Palm Springs, so I'm staying out at the B bar H. Oh the B bar H Yeah, what are you living in a room or a cabin in the bar? You must have loved that no no not any more partner. I'm on a wagon you on the wagon Yes, sir. We all I take is two drinks a day Well, if you're on the wagon, you shouldn't drink anything look Jackson my stomach's like a steel mill You can shut it down, but don't let the fire go out You mean that right arm of yours a pretty good stoker, too Time for a band number your boy's ready to play yeah Jackson, but I forgot to bring the music you didn't forget it brother. I hit it Music only confuses them anyway now wait a minute Jackson wait a minute wait a minute Let's don't start that again. You've been riding my boys long enough my orchestra is not as bad as you so unprovocatably in fur There he goes with that word again unprovocatably pill you use that same word last Sunday look when I spend a whole winter learning something I ain't gonna throw it away on one broadcaster Provocatively or not all I know is when your band plays a number it sounds like a filibuster with instruments I'll go ahead and hold it hold it a minute Jackson. What was that lovely words you just said? Filibuster she already know unprovocatably and now filibuster stay Jackson. How do you spell filibuster? C-a-t Now we'll go ahead and play with a C-a-t filibuster. I'll have to remember that yeah I'm trying to say this if my band is as loud as you say it is Why do you have them on your program because I feel it's my civic duty to keep them off the streets They throw up their hands and how are we what's framed by some new clothes on their shirts are beginning to fade And now ladies and gentlemen tell me for the last time my band is not as bad as you so unprovocatably filibuster The buster he believes it. Well, I think it's a shame though You take advantage of Phil just because he's a dope you tell him levy simple word filibuster Oh sure, I'll bet you don't even know what it means. I do too the filibuster is when a man gets up and Well, he says a lot of things that don't quite Well, he he rambles on and I have to tobacco auction here. I Don't mean him what I mean Mary Mary what Jack is trying to say is that a filibuster is an innocuous speech The main purpose of which is not to necessarily convey subject matter But to deliberately delay the introduction of controversial issues. I never should have gone on the way Quiet now I'll give you an example if I knew that Jack was going to cut my salary I'd prevent him from telling me by filibustering. Oh, oh, Don. I'm glad you mentioned that by a strange coincidence I was looking over my budget and would you mind taking lsmf t lsmf t Lucky strike means fine tobacco a little round so firm so fully packed so free and easy on the draw Don kick kick kick kick kick kick kick kick kick kick a cut Yes, sir, you bet with men and on a back of best. It's lucky two to one Don lucky strikes are made of the finer the lighter the naturally milder tobacco Lsmf t lsmf t not anybody's salary. That's what a filibuster is. Now. Let's get on with it I'll get it. You know, I'm in the middle of a program. Do you have to call me now? Well, this is an emergency every time you drive my car any places an emergency. What happened now? Well, boss, you know after your past, are you trying to tell me you had a wreck with the train? Train was it? Well, all my shirts were in that bag. No, what do you say? No, I don't know what I do Very good Larry and now kids after the show tonight I want you all to come over to my place and have some sandwiches and coffee, you know I've I've got Eddie Cantor's house here or you have Mary what's so funny about my having Eddie Cantor's house? Well, tell Don how you got it Mary It's not that important. I got the house. That's all that count Well, anyway, Don, here's the way it happened. You happen to happen Jack and I came down a pump thing last Monday when we arrived in town We parked the car and walked down the street looking for a real estate agent Now he isn't Palm Springs wonderful, you know, I like to come down here The only chance I get to wear my cowboy suit Jack don't walk so fast the sand gets in my open-toe shoes mine, too Yeah, I'm getting hungry. So am I let's get something to eat. All right, maybe we can well We're in luck. There's a hot dog stand some luck. You wait here. I'll be right back Peekle in the middle and the mustard on top just the way you like them and the whole red To hot dogs, please Say I I remember you what are you doing in Palm Springs? Well, I'm opening up a new branch so far. I got a hot dog stand in Santa Monica And now and now you've got one in Palm Springs Yeah, you see I'm opening up so many stands that everybody in California will soon be hot dog on conscious You you mean hot dog conscious on conscious conscious I see. Well, how how about my hot dog coming up? What kind of mustard would you like? Mile, please Thank you. How much are the hot dogs to you? Well, how much are they to other people? Yeah, Mary, here's your hot dog Jack. I don't think hot dogs gonna do me. I want a regular lunch But Mary to us these were 10 cents a piece to us. Well, how much are they to other people 10 cents? Who do you think we are? Anyway, if we eat these we won't be wasting time. I have to find a place to live here Well, first let's have a regular lunch. All right. Come on. We'll go over to the dooms. That's a nice restaurant Never crowded today. I hope we get a table. Yeah, here comes the oh pardon me Are you the waiter? Well, what do you think I am with this shirt tie and shoes on again? I thought I could get away from him down here I'd like to get a table for two, please as soon as I have one go into the bar and I'll call you I don't want to go into the bar. Well go somewhere. I can't stand you here Look, we came in here to get something to eat and if you don't show stop breathing on my discharge button Eddie canter where oh Yeah, maybe we can sit with him. Yeah, that's Eddie Gee, I hope I look as good as he does when I'm his age Come on Mary. Let's go sit with him. Hey Jack. I just thought of something Eddie's got a house in Palm Springs Maybe you'll rent your room. What do you mean rent me a room? He's a friend of mine You'll probably give it to me for nothing. Let's sit with them Hello Eddie house. Well, thanks Eddie, but I have been a little sick, you know sick or not I hope I look as good as you do when I'm your age You did me. I haven't been home all week, you know, we pull Los Angeles tonight Eddie You're going back to Los Angeles. Yeah, I'm starved Jack. I'm gonna order something go ahead, Mary incidentally the peanut butter sandwiches here are are delicious I'm ordering the roast beef incidentally the roast beef cost a dollar seventy-five Incidentally everybody's looking at a shut up Mary. You can have the roast beef But if I want to kiss later, don't ask what for brother what you have to go through to keep him starving Say, I'm kind of hungry myself. What are you having Eddie? It looks good chicken soup with egg noodles Chicken soup with egg noodles. I think I'll have some of that. Okay. I'll have the way to bring you a spoon. No, no Eddie, I'll order some, you know a bowl for myself. They haven't got it today. I brought this from home. Oh Boom waiters fool You don't have to throw it And wait bring me an order of roast beef at last to fail in this booth. I can't believe it Fresh guy. See this soup looks good. Eddie. Yeah, let's start ready You know Eddie, I'm sure glad I boy this soup is hot. You know Eddie. I'm sure glad I Eddie Would you mind eating with your left hand and putting your right arm around my shoulder? I'm too far from the bowl You put your right hand through my left sleeve then we can both dip at the same time No, then we'd have to cut a hole in your coat. That won't work Why don't you put the bowl on my head and eat piggyback? You go and get that roast beef. I think we're all right now Eddie. Let's go. Okay ready As I was saying Eddie, I'm sure glad I bumped into Jack Would you mind breaking a cracker and putting it into the soup, but I can't stand crackers in my suit Well break one in any way and float it over to my side Okay There anyway, Eddie, I'm sure glad I but you see you see the crackers aren't floating. They're all on my side Well tip the bowl a little tip the bowl a little. Oh, yeah Get ready forward sue They marry while you're waiting. Why don't you get a spoon and join us? Don't bring guests. It's crowded enough Well, I've had enough anyway. Here's your roast beef. Thank you You want three forks with it or are the boys sitting this one out? Don't be so smart now Eddie as I was saying I'm sure glad I bumped into you See, I'm gonna stay in Palm Springs for a while and I was wondering if you knew of any place where I could live When did you say you were going back Eddie tonight? Oh? Well, I was just wondering if you knew of any place where I could live from tonight Well, Jack, I can't think of any place for rent at the moment, but Say I'll tell you what what what tell me what what what what what no no, I don't think you'd like Yes, I would tell me tell me what what do you want to say Eddie? Well, I happen to have a little house down here. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, so why don't you stay there Well, that's darn nice. Yeah, what would you charge me for Jack? We're friends We've known each other for years take the house for nothing. No, no, and I'll wave friendship is friendship But I don't want to take advantage of it. I insist on paying you for the house. Oh take it for nothing Please I'll feel better, but Eddie I'll feel much better if you charge me something for it a little something No, no. Yes. Yes. Yes. How much do you want for one week? $300. Isn't that a big jump from nothing? More roast beef. We'll be here a long time Mary look Eddie $300 a lot of money, but Jack look what you're getting the tennis court I don't play tennis a swimming pool. I can't swim and a beautiful kitchen. I know you make cookies Eddie, I still think $300 a little hot. All right, you can have the house for 250. How's that? Look Eddie, give me the house for nothing. You'll feel better like you stand All right, Jack. I'll give you the house for nothing, but do me one favor What there are plenty of hotels and Palm Springs don't start a new one, huh? Don't worry, I won't thank that but just a minute Jack before I give you the key I think I'd better call I don't see but it's okay. All right, Eddie do it now. I'll be back in a minute Never dreamed I get candid house for nothing. Yeah, one room to down one to fill one room to you Wait a minute. I don't hang up but either but either I Couldn't turn him down. He's an old friend He's an old watch if I was in his position How much can he make selling cigarettes? But either now I look like I'm the boss. I'm not going to argue with you any longer I promise Jack many could have the house and you're gonna get it. Goodbye And are you in luck to anybody else the house would be three hundred dollars and to me it's for nothing Three hundred dollars. Who do you think you are? I can just a minute, but first here is my good friend Effie boom American certain facts must be plain to every smoker It takes fine tobacco to make a fine cigarette and lucky strike means fine tobacco Yes, independent tobacco experts present at the auctions year after year can see the makers of lucky strike Consistently select and buy the finer the lighter the naturally milder lucky strike tobacco This fine lucky strike tobacco means real deep down smoking enjoyment for you certain facts are plain You know cigarette it's the tobacco that counts and lucky strike means fine tobacco. Yes LST so smoke that smoke of fine tobacco lucky strike so round so firm so fully packed So free and easy on the draw the famous tobacco auctioneer so down tonight's programmer. Mr. Effie boom of Lexington, Kentucky American and mr. LA speed rigs of gold for a North Carolina Isle speaking for lucky strike LST LST LST There's fine smoking pleasure in fine tobacco and lucky strike means fine tobacco So round so firm so fully packed so free and easy on the draw He married with certainly nice of Eddie canner. Let me have his house. It sure was you know He was only kidding me gave it to me for nothing and just think it has four bedrooms. Yeah, you'll make a fortune Mary I'm not gonna charge my friends my fault that everybody can't stand me. Good night Then be see the national broadcasting company