 Hey everybody. Good afternoon. Thanks for joining us on a Tuesday for another episode of Dr. Jill Live. Today I have a awesome becoming cool amazing friend with some fun facts and we're going to dive into rock your body women and health and body image and all this stuff. You're going to hear from us personally because we both live this we try to model it we grow through it and we're going to share some strategies that we've learned but I'm super excited to have Brie known as Betty rocker here today. She's got a great huge audience and rightfully so because she brings so much great content recipes weight loss ideas fitness ideas to her world and her clients and I'm so excited to have her here today. The funny thing is we are just talking getting ready to go live is one of these fun facts that you may not know about both of us is we are both motorcycle biker babes. Some people know that about me and I knew that about you for you said in the 30s you started writing. I started riding a street bike in my 30s but had been riding dirt bikes as a kid and was like 11 years mountain biking hardcore and just always really liked things on two wheels like thought it was really fun and challenging for me and cool and just I love that about you and I remember here and I'm like this is cool because you know it's funny and that's one of the things about my audience they know me fairly well but a lot of people are surprised that I have a BMW adventure bike and it's huge is like 450 pounds so it's a very large and fast and that's actually that's really impressive I was actually gonna ask how big your bike was because I think you're a little taller than me. People see me online they see both of us online and may not know like how I'm five one in real life I'm six one in virtual reality because of my personality is so big. That's a really good thing isn't it like it's hilarious but I basically like when I had a when I was riding this on the street a lot more I had a modified 250 that I had, you know, I was able to ride on the track to do track days and stuff it's actually much a much safer ride on the racetrack than it is on the street because there's no cars on the racetrack and you've got, you know, support standing by in case anybody gets hurt you're usually wearing full leather suit on everything that you should be. I've had tumbles on the street, we're like, you know, terrible because I was wearing a jacket that rode up you know when I fell so. Oh my gosh I would wear Lulu lemon and tennis shoes was like no socks and I'm like okay now I have full Italian here that's like the same thing I'm like oh if I fall I am going to be totally screwed so I want to go dirt bike riding with you that sounds. Yeah, much fun. That would be super fun, we can even you know we can rent bikes and go and it's like a whole day it's like super fun. There's just so many ways to enjoy being outside and enjoy like when you have a strong healthy fit body that you're taking care of like, it's not just about constantly doing workouts to like look good it's like what can I do with this body how can I test myself, you know, like, am I, how am I taking How's how I'm taking care of myself translating into the things that I enjoy in my day to day life and even the little things that I do at home like when I'm doing laundry and I pick up the heavy laundry or I'm going grocery shopping and I'm carrying the bags, you know, in from the car, how am I using my body in ways that, you know, are supportive to me and also make me appreciate all this effort that I put into being strong and healthy and aging healthy and all these things. Oh my goodness so we already I'm like thinking of a million things we're going to talk about this is one of those things I haven't even introduced you. But this is one of those things I actually love that you brought it up because what I've been living and teaching people more and more is how do you incorporate day to day movement and activity and exercise into your routine so you don't feel like you're doing a workout, like I never it people are shocked, because I have a pretty good system a frame and, but I don't work out, like I literally stopped working out a couple years ago my course I went down I got in the best shape my life. What I do those if I'm walking the dogs I do lunges if I'm standing making coffee I do calf raises if I'm getting up out of bed and when I do my 10 push ups I just have these little things I just sneak in. And I tag them to another habit like brushing my teeth, so that all of a sudden I've got through my day I've got main muscle groups kind of taking care of and I really haven't done a workout. And I love what you're saying there because as you lift something up or as you go downstairs if you're conscious of your muscles. Before I introduce you talk just a little bit about that because I think that's so important for people because that workout mentality is just wrong with it. Is it sabotage or it can feel like a chore. And how do we get out of feeling like a chore and making our bodies part of our daily lives. Well I have an answer for that and my answer for that is challenges because I like a challenge so I like to have like an activity I'm looking forward to like cross off my list so that's sort of fun but I absolutely love what you just said about incorporating actions physical actions into your daily routines and building habits around that, because so many of us end up sedentary for eight hours in the day and we don't have enough movement and then we go and do a hard workout but the body is like stiff or we're you know we just haven't moved at all so even if you are exercising and have a workout routine. I when I go get a glass of water I incorporate stretching in my doorway as I walk in and out of the door right I like to before I come sit back down on my chair or couch. I'll do a hamstring stretch to put my leg up on the side and I'll do stretching I incorporate more stretching and mobility type drills into my movement patterns throughout the day, as opposed to exercise moves because I know I just want to do my goal is to stay limber and flood fluid so that when I do my workout I'm feeling like, like ready to go. But I think we're both saying similar things and how can we take advantage of the time that we have and then what I was talking about with how we're walking carrying the groceries or walking up the stairs, or picking the laundry up and putting it up on the back and a lot of this comes down to your body mechanics right and and being very mindful of core engagement and how you're supporting your rotator cuff, and that you're not rounding your back and picking things up with your back right so even just picking the laundry up I'm activating my glutes because I'm squatting properly and engaging my core and thinking about how am I holding my shoulders back and down well I'm carrying the grocery bags or picking up the dog in a supportive way for myself. So just think of that as you're talking to like me you know shoulder blades back and you know good posture and if you're listening at home in the car wherever you're walking. Think about your posture right now and think about a little string pulling your, you know, I love this just that mindfulness around our body and how we conduct ourselves. If you're a woman just imagine you're always wearing that crown because you're a queen and you know it and just don't let your crown fall down. Okay, let's love it. It's like the indigenous cultures that carry the baskets on their head everyone so I'll take out the trash or a big box and I'll like put it on my head and like to attending like I'm one of these gorgeous fruit baskets on my head because it's you know you're going to engage that whole core and have great posture when you do that. Totally, totally. Oh this is fun well let me actually introduce you and then we'll dive in with some more great tips hopefully you guys have wetted your appetite for Betty rocker who is, like I said just an amazing resource, I will be sure during this, wherever you're listening, you will be able to find her website her resources I really want to highlight all the work that she's doing. She is Bri, also known as Betty rocker internationally known health fitness coach innovative entrepreneur and motivator self growth. One of the things that I recognize when we met was a woman like myself and you know so neat in this area of people who have this heart to inspire and to show up and to teach and to innovate but also are really like I was an accidental business woman you probably were more purposeful than me but I see that and you two you're really really good business woman. And I think the sphere can get a little lonely as far as you know how do we show up how do we teach how do we deal with our own stuff. And then we'll talk about all that today. She has over 3 million people have taken her free 30 day makeover. Sorry, make fat cry home workout challenge and hundreds of thousands more enjoy success in her online home workout studio rock your life I know tons of my patients have done your programs, they love them. In fact, on the documentary that our executive producer he's always like, I've done her program and I love it. You are known and loved by many and that's amazing to incorporate this strong holistic focus on body balancing self kindness and alignment into her work. That's where we're going to really dive today so stay tuned if you want to know more. Thanks to her background as a hands on structural alignment practitioner and her training in the check corrective. Oh I know what that is. I did a performance exercise can you the allergy program that changed my life by the way we'll have to go into that later that check program so I didn't even know you were a practitioner. Hailed as a gateway to personal growth their food and fitness she takes an accessible all or something approached to living a healthy lifestyle of balance and encourages women to listen to their bodies. Let's start there. How do we do that I think this is so important and you and I both when we're engaging in a client or a patient. It's really like how do we listen and hold space for them to really start to engage in themselves. What do you do what do you teach tell us more about your philosophy on engaging in our own bodies and being more self aware. A lot of time to reflect on this question actually when I was the privileged guest on the Netflix documentary that's coming out where they were asking me this question about what sets you apart in your practice and I'm just I know you guys love Dr Jill so I just have to say I love Dr Jill. She actually takes care of me so I'm like so happy to say that this question is actually something that we have in common so it's really easy for me to answer it's one of the reasons I'm one of your patients. And that is that I first listen to my people I let them tell me what they're feeling and I listen and I listen with my whole self you know whether they're writing me an Instagram message I'm reading between the lines of what you guys are telling me and I ask for more information about how you feel because your body is actually talking to you all the time and I'm like I want to know how are you sleeping you know like are you feeling like you're getting good sleep and how are you managing your stress and what things are stressing you out in your life and where does that show up in your body are you feeling achy are you feeling like you have a stomach ache do you have a headache like what are the what are the what's the body talk going on. Because that is like this this communication that your body is having with you and how we have the opportunity to communicate back to the body by nourishing it by practicing our self care rituals by seeking out resources like these wonderful doctors that we have available. And but but when you asked me the question of like how do we encourage our people to listen to their bodies we start by listening to them first and foremost and then that's what you do for me, and then drawing that out and and and telling them what we're hearing and then connecting that directly to say this is what sounds like your body may be saying this. Now I may be able to figure out some of this with you, but for in my own life, as much as I've been able to figure out on my own I've also needed to go to resource like you like a doctor and say like, let's get some more data on that and see if the data matches up right. So for my people for the things that they can look at in their own lives it's like okay when you're doing squats and lunges. When you listen to your body means, do you feel it more on one side than the other. Do you have like any pain, when you're coming down in your squad or coming up when you look at yourself in the mirror. Are you bending forward or are you standing up right so there's a lot that we can look at both in the signals the body sending us when we know how to listen to them, and guiding our customers and clients and fans as to like what to look for what science to look for it's all about listening and it all starts with us when they come to us listening to them. I love that brief because really that holding space and so many people are running around and they've lived at least I've done this to lived above their neck in their head analytical for most of their lives and they're not really in tune they've learned due to trauma due to you know whatever dysfunction that they had before maybe pain maybe suffering. They've kind of disconnected from that physical body. The truth is that physical body gives us clues and tells us exactly what we need where we need to go. And just like you in the clinic. I'm always trying to help patients reconnect and somebody that starts with like an elimination diet where they take out gluten dairy egg soy corn sugar alcohol, and all of a sudden they feel amazing like wow this is really cool. I remember 20 years ago when I first started functional medicine and the only tool I had in the very beginning was an elimination diet. And I'd say okay do this elimination diet and come back in 30 days and tell me how you are. And the patient would come back in like oh my gosh my joint pains better my brain fogs better my sleep is better all this and I just be like, really. Wow, it really works. I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything and also like I was surprised but what that did what I loved in that space was they reconnected with how food made them feel. I mean we can talk about diet and food and all these things we hear and there's so many messages out there and we lose connection with our body what our body needs. Some of us don't need more fat we need more carb, some of us need more protein, and it's not there's never one size fits all. How do you approach as your fans and followers talk about food and diet and I'm not losing weight or I'm gaining weight or I'm feeling miserable or whatever. Food is such a core part of this and we've lost connection with our bodies and with how food makes us feel. Any tips on reconnecting with that. Yeah, especially as women. And I'm going to speak from the position of a fitness coach in this regard and as a female trainer who coaches female clients. One of the big things that I think has been missing from the conversation around nutrition and how we're eating and fueling ourselves is this question of our menstrual cycle. And that's something I've been super interested in and not just when you're having a regular cycle but perimenopause post menopause. How do the nutrients that you're eating impact your system how do your estrogen and progesterone impact how your body is processing food. And there are times when your body needs more carbohydrates for example when you're in Perry and post menopause, your need for carbs is still there but you have to be even more careful of processed foods processed carbohydrates sugars right, we have less of that threshold to manage that stuff at that point in our lives and we need a greater stimulus from protein from amino acids because we don't absorb them as readily as we get into that stage of life and so we need just like a bigger stimulus in order to get the response to build muscle to shift body composition to lose body fat and I feel like at every stage of life a lot of women are just not aware of what amino acids are doing for their body what they're doing in their system I mean it's not just about building the muscles it's about cognition brain function hormone health enzyme health. These different things that are so at your immune system all these things are so important, and the amino acids we get them from protein. And we need complete protein sources in order to get all of the essential amino acids which are the ones that your body can't make on its own. And I just see that there's a big gap between things like protein and carbs, and actually eating enough around your workouts and thinking about fueling for the actual activities that you're doing throughout the day. And there's a lot of focus on, you know, portion control and mitigating the sugar cravings and trying to like count calories and these are all strategies that can be useful but when that's all you've got and you don't have a foundation of actual nutrition nutrition and food I think that we lose out as women, especially. So I just, I feel like there's a lot of a lot of noise right now out there and especially around specific dietary strategies. I don't want to like demonize anything because I think part of the journey is experimenting and seeing what works for yourself so that you can listen to your body and hear how it likes these things. So there are certain dietary strategies that you may find initially give you success for the first month or two, perhaps because your bodies, because you're paying more attention to what you're eating for the first time. However, if you have prolonged period where you're not getting enough fuel for yourself, your course all levels are going to rise, and you're going to start gaining more body fat than losing. Some people mistake stress for mental clarity, they feel anxious all the time but they actually think they're on alert and that's actually a good thing but it's actually heightened stress. So I don't know I'm sure as a doctor you have a lot of expertise in this area. I just, those are some things that have been really interesting to me recently that a lot of women are trying to not eat carbohydrates from healthy complex food, carbohydrate sources, not focusing on enough protein, not realizing that once we get to 40 and beyond we need to be actually upping our protein intake so that we can absorb amino acids as readily as we did when we were younger. There's just a lot to it that that piece that that framework as a woman has been really helpful to me and that's something I've been talking about a lot lately. Love that and just a couple comments because this is so relevant I know people are kind of hungry for like more specifics and I like you. I have probably 20 or 30 dietary types of protocols that I use in practice and there's no one size fits all. So like I feel like it's super important not to say this is the best and it's always the best I mean there's docs that whole platform is on one diet. I don't think that works I'm going to be honest, but here's what I do think is true. We do need plants and I'm not saying vegetarian actually think animal protein is a perfectly healthy part of this but we have this like all or nothing. And I hear this all the time of like the carnivore and the keto or the vegetarian or the vegan, like wait a second here. There's parts of all these that are true and you can take some of this and use it into your own life. I do come to find with people with gut issues for auto immunity. There are a lot of foods and cities and what happens is the grains in general have more mycotoxins and molds. So I do not believe everybody needs to be on a grain free diet, but those who are super sensitive can eliminate some of those things that are triggering for auto immunity by being more grain free, often what we'll do is at least gluten free and then you know rice, buckwheat, amaranth, all these good wonderful gluten free grains are appropriate, because like you said I really think a lot of women need more carbohydrate, because the adrenals when those aren't working well, your glycogen stores fall and you cannot maintain perfect example I did a climb a couple a week ago for the documentary. It was really stressful for me. I'm not a climber I have hardly any experience so I put myself out there in a really kind of dangerous situation. And I did it and it was about two hours climbed got down and I started walking home, and because I had to leave before the group I was alone. I started shaking and trembling and I was like, Oh, my blood sugar is really freaking low. I didn't test it because I'm walking down the mountain but I literally couldn't stop shaking. As soon as I got to the car I don't normally do this but I had like a healthy candy bar I'm like sugar and within this I was fine. So that was a time where I actually did not think well enough to help my glycogen stores and make sure that I had fuel, because I actually let it go way too long and I'm sure because of that my cortisol rose and it was a whole mess. By two hours later I was fine but that's a very clear example where I messed up and kind of didn't really think about what my body was needing. And then I literally probably had a blood sugar 40 if I would have measured it it was it was terrible I felt awful. That's such a good point to about like the preparedness and also just like as a doctor who is seeing the data and blood work of your clients you have this. This is like why dietary protocols, I feel like there are some really important reasons why we might have a specific dietary protocol which would help us with a specific need, but in general, I feel like we should just be eating more food in general from the plants from all these sources of protein you know whatever your choices of where to get it from your healthy fats, but just to your point about preparedness. This is a piece that I've been like really working on in myself and have talked about for many years which is to choose a system for yourself of success and it can you can have a couple systems that work for you so I teach batch hybrid or minimal preparation for yourself throughout like, you know so like if you're going to do a batch preparation, will you pick four or five staple recipes for the week, some might be breakfast, some might be dinners, and you just do some prep in a day and like have your foods ready to go for you to just grab and go for the week so that when you have like a special event and you're going to go hiking, you put some food in a container and you put it in your car and you go and then you just have it to eat afterwards it's like huge. So hybrid which I love which is like I've got like maybe two or three staple things like I cook chicken breasts I baked a sheet tray of like veggies and proteins. And then I'm going to cook on the fly throughout the week to like I've got like a lunch that I can take or something. And then the minimal is for those who are maybe like traveling or just really busy don't have time I've got like, you know I have like this system where I just say like okay we're going to focus on and make sure we have like smoothie ingredients we're going to make sure we have like some good healthy meal options ready for us or like the groceries for some of them so it's just being strategic and thinking about preparing yourself because there's an inevitable thing that's going to happen every single day you're going to get hungry. And you want to have a plan for that. So, I don't know it's just like. I'm so glad you're bringing this up because this is really the core and even though I did that and had that happen in my bag in my car I had nut bars I had these candy bars again our perfect blood sugar right. And we were perfectly appropriate in that situation even though it typically wouldn't be a go to. I love that and people ask all the time like for you or for me what do we have busy lives I the same as you on usually Saturday or Sunday. We have chicken a bunch of roasted vegetables and those are just in my fridge and glass and peanuts, or I'll prep if I go to the farmers market in the summer I'll prep all the veggies because what you don't want to do is go to the fridge you're starving hungry and there's big lettuce that needs washing and celery that needs cutting and all this stuff that needs prepping, and you're so hungry you go instead and grab some, you know, gluten free crackers which are, you know, not that great. So delivery or take out because you're just like, I can't deal with this right now and we are all we all know we're going to get busy during the week we know that things are going to end you know on the weekend. I get it like I don't always want to like cook or or or prep but I know if I just do a little bit now. And I think about like and often that's why oftentimes I'm very boring I'll have like the same sort of stuff for like multiple weeks in a row and they're like I'm a little bored of this I'm going to change the sauce I'm going to change the protein I'm going to change. Like the thing or I saw I'll be like okay I'm going to look up, you know, the amount of time that we all spend on social media. I mean, you got some time to like look at some recipes like down a couple ideas right so yeah. I love this because honestly this is this this is one of those secrets that you and I both doing we're teaching to our patients and clients, and it is the game changer for me because I always have something and I get home from work sometimes seven or eight o'clock at night I'm starving. And I go to the fridge I can always have a meal that's basically ready to reheat if I need to, because I've thought about it ahead of time. And if I didn't, I would not be eating as healthy as I do because I would just go to whatever is convenient. Sure, like everything I was saying before, especially when it comes to protein like you have to think ahead about that stuff you know like if that's supposed to be like chicken out of the freezer is not going to make it. Yeah, it's and so you end up like with these quick fix foods and or you order some takeout and it's loose with loaded with sodium or it got a lot of sugar in the sauce and you're just like, Well, I'm full now but I also just like spiked my blood sugar so high from all of that, you know and I guess, you don't sleep as well as a result and you, you know, it just does the snowball effect that ends up not serving us long enough. You know, there's this hidden secret I learned years ago I'm sure you teach your clients the same thing as sauces dressings marinades are usually the hidden culprit for either gluten or dairy or sugar or other things like for me so as an issue or sometimes it fits fermented with the issues I don't like to do a lot of fermented stuff. But when you're cooking at home you can really control things like oils and sauces are to sabotage, and we're eating out usually the oils they use are not healthy their canola soy or something or their fake olive oils are not even, you know, clean, and then even the sources of your meats and the sources of your vegetables do matter so if you're 80% takeout no matter where you go, you're not going to be that healthy because you're getting these, you know, sneaky ingredients that are in there. Whereas at home you can make some delicious meals and you can control the oils and the sauces and those types of things. So it does make a difference. If you are on the go and you know I've found I just talked to the chef I'm like I want I tell him how to make my meal I literally like pick something off the, like I see the salmon and they have all the stuff in it that I couldn't eat I'm like can you just saute that with garlic and olive oil and add some roasted vegetables but don't be afraid to speak up because a lot of women and men I'm sure have these dietary restrictions and they feel ashamed. And whether it's there with a group and they don't want to draw attention to themselves or they don't want to you know cause problems with the weight staff. I just make a scene and I'm like I want it like this and I want it like this I tell them how to do it. Any tips for dietary restrictions and eating out because that's just kind of common and people I think have some trouble asking for what they need sometimes. Well as someone who was a server for almost 15 years and you know former waitress like in that in that sense, I do. I did better when someone asked nicely and tipped well when I did something for them. So I would be careful of making too many demands of your server, but I would, I would, I think I mean I was always like, eager to please my customers and when people asked nicely it was like how can I help you you know, but one thing I always done I call it menu surfing, which is really fun. I look at the, the menu and look for ingredients basically what ingredients are in the dishes and I don't try to like make up a whole different dish generally. Usually I'll just like leave, I'll like change the side or just like leave off the sauce or, you know, ask for grilled chicken if I'm you know wanting something like that or the sauce on the side it's usually pretty simple. When you're getting like veggies and a protein and a carb side so. I love that I love your, I mean, always respect your way. I would do it I'm saying it like I'm demanding but it's just like I know you meant I just wanted to point that out for anyone who maybe got the wrong impression. Absolutely, absolutely 100%. So let's talk about your kind of for how you look at and bring into your training and stuff the four pillars of health. Let's talk about that and sleep. It's funny because getting to be like your client or working with any great functional medicine doctor in the past. I feel like it's a two way street right like I don't come to the doctor and expect them to fix me. I'm going to be taking responsibility for what I can do myself and these four pillars of health that I came up with are sort of like the things I feel like are within each of our domain as individuals. So basically it's sleep, nutrition, stress management and exercise, and I get that there's a whole realm within each of those that each of us has to discover and experience for ourselves at like what do I do there what's right for me. That's part of that, you know, listening to your body piece like finding out what works for you and also being accepting of the fact that it may change throughout your lifetime like we talked about different dietary strategies when it comes to nutrition you know if you're feeling good in your stomach after you eat and you're breaking out in your skin a lot you know it might be time to look at a different dietary approach. If you're really struggling with body composition like these are all things that I coach my my readers on a lot you know just like a let's start with sleep because sleep is like at the top of my of my four pillars just like are you are you actually making the effort to get to bed on time and there's going to be seasons of life where sleep cannot be the focus or it simply is not possible to get good but there's other times in life where we just push it aside as a priority when it really could be more of a priority so that's a big one for me and obviously we talked about nutrition stress management, we all know is super important and it's one of those things that's hidden in plain sight we have to get out ahead of it, we can't just like expect our stress to manage itself. I talked a little bit about trauma a little while ago you mentioned it and I just feel like trauma is one of those like underlying pieces of stress that for many of us we haven't, we haven't addressed and for me personally when I realize that I, I was just living in this like anxiety depression soup and I was just like functioning functioning functioning like like doing doing doing like in my addiction at the time was work I had, you know, alleviated some of my other. I feel like what trauma brings out of a lot of us is addictive behaviors whether it's alcohol drugs sexual addiction shopping addiction all these different addictions come from pain, because we're trying to suppress pain and I learned a lot about that from reading Gabbermotte's work who I'm such a huge fan of, but I experienced that personally in just becoming such a busy busy busy person and I created a successful thriving business in the midst of all of that pain and yet I wasn't I wasn't I don't think I was going to be able to sustain that pace. And so I had gone to Dr. Amen clinic and got my brain scanned after reading his fabulous book change your brain change your life, because I realized I had to take responsibility for this. I was living in stress soup, you know, and I, they they his amazing team referred me to EMDR practice and I started down that journey and spent a couple years working with an incredible practitioner who I still see to this day on occasion just for like regular work that changed the game for me personally was addressing the root cause of some of my deep rooted stress. And, and then I was much more receptive at this point in life other things I do daily just to manage daily stresses at my dog play with my dog and facilitate right gratitude. And I've done so much work around my mental approach to life in general, that I feel when something is difficult. I often look immediately for it as an opportunity instead of like, you know, this is happening to me why you don't feel like a victim anymore I feel like the conscious creator of my life and so when things get thrown at me that are challenging I have the tools and the skill sets to not be reactive anymore I can be more proactive with them and that makes it easier to run a big team to handle all the challenges and all of the responsibilities that I've chosen to take on in my life. And life is about choices, basically, so these four pillars of health coming back to them, they're all choices that we make about how much energy and time we're going to give the responsibilities that we have for being adult humans on this planet taking care of ourselves and taking care of the people around us and modeling good behavior to the kids and the people who need us right. And the final pillar the exercise pillar. Dr Jill has one way she handles that pillar all day long with her fun little practices, I have another way right like I just like to have a program to follow and that works for me and so different things work for different people at different levels. And that's why I always say it's all or something not all or nothing. So that's my four pillars for you in a nutshell. Love it so so practical and so important I mean basics that people forget like sleep and stress. And I love that you shared your journey and healing like some of the stuff because same thing here and what I found is I've been a surgeon functionalist in about 20 years. In the last five years I really worked on my own mental emotional health my own traumas, just like you have done hours of therapy and hours of work and what what it really has brought the surface is a lot more healing in my physical body and it's been a big aha for me around I know the supplements that function as a diet like I could do to my sleep, but a lot of the really profound healing in myself first and also my patients comes from encouraging them to go inside to get with a practitioner to really do the work and it's funny because like you, I think I heard Joe Polish talking about addictions several years ago and I remember sitting there like yeah whatever I'm not an addict I don't have any issues. And he was like, and all of you in this room are addicts and he's talking about work. You know, it was the first time I really was like, Oh, wait, are you in the genius network. I didn't know you. Yeah. I remember like sitting every like, oh crap. I'm one of them to like I, you know, of course right but I was in this denial thing and then I realized so profoundly like work might be the biggest addiction and because it's socially acceptable we get accolades we have, you know, clients or whatever it reinforces itself so until we look at it. And I don't know if you experienced this but for me it was like movement and busyness was the way to avoid pain and emotion. So I would always be doing something like I could hardly sit still if I wanted to now I can because I've done the work but I realized I had to actually do the work around trauma and emotions because before when I would try to sit still or be still, I would get anxious because they all these motions I was like trying to keep down and that busyness and that going and being and all that were covering up some work that I needed to do. So now I can sit for an hour and no problem at all but it took some dealing with those emotional triggers underneath. And I just love that we're being real because I think there's a lot of women out there that are just like you and me they're successful you're probably listening out here and doing this life where you're balancing your family and your children and your pets and your work and this and go go go go go. And number one, if you're not really taking care of yourself. You know what good is that in number two, that stress response at cortisol is going to take a toll on your body if it isn't now it will someday. Let's talk a little bit about weight because so many women, first of all, I don't want to focus on weight as the pure end goal just burdened some number on the scale because you and I both don't think like that. And I think we both realize through our mold journeys and how much it's like, we can do all the right stuff and our bodies don't always respond and I experienced that firsthand. But how do you talk to clients when they're stuck there maybe doing all the right things. How do we like love our bodies where we're at but also make the progress towards where we'd like to be for strength and maybe even shifting our mindset around. What is beauty and what do we want from our bodies and how do we love them because this is so core, at least to my journey. There's a lot to unpack there first I want to thank you for acknowledging that it's not about weight loss. It's really about fat loss if you are looking at a body composition shift right we're wanting to lose body fat but more importantly and this is the piece that I think is missing from the conversation for women specifically. Let's talk about growing muscle, because muscle is more compact and dense and it also supports your joints it supports you gives you more power capability and strength as you go through this life. You have autonomy in your life, older you get the more capable you are in your physical body right the stronger you are so I like to focus on how can we support growing our muscle. And the fat loss kind of comes along with that naturally when we sort of shift our frame of like what's important to us because when we think about how can I fuel my muscle. How can I fuel for my workouts instead of like how little do I have to eat to burn the calories to lose the fat right because your body doesn't do this equation of like. Okay, today I ate 400 calories so I have to get on the treadmill and burn 400 calories and then actually should probably burn at least 500 because I need to be in a deficit like it doesn't actually that way. Yeah, so the way it works of course nutrient partitioning is a big part of that and that's a lot to do with your insulin sensitivity and I'm sure that you educate a ton about this. So, I just think that when it comes to how we see ourselves, we have to really take a good hard look at the amount of stress that we ourselves are responsible for when it comes to the stress we have about our bodies because we. We don't want to be triggering the cortisol response every time we go to the gym just because we're stressed out about how we look in our workout clothes or how we fit into this thing and how we how you know. So much of what we've been sold since we were little girls came from this plastic Barbie whose body was plastic no cellulite blonde right like this image of a woman. I like 5% body fat and we're idolizing this body type which and it's not just Barbie right I don't want to demonize just Barbie it's it's everything to do with culture around the perception of for little girls of what they aspire to be and I think the conversation, I think it's there's a lot of in helping that to change, but you as the adult woman, most first and foremost must heal that little girl inside of you and start to see your body as this incredibly capable machine that can do so much as taking care of you every single day is enabling you with this gift of being able to walk and see talk think here smell taste all the things that you do every single day, and I think just getting out in front of that with some gratitude can help to put a little bit less of that stress in your brain all to all the time. That's been hugely helpful for me especially going through my mold journey as, as some of you know if you know I, if you've listened to my, my show with Jill I've interviewed her about this because I got exposed to mold, couple years back and really struggled to figure out a what was wrong and be what was happening because as a trainer I have a regular regimen myself with eating and training and is pretty simple for me to maintain my physique. However I started gaining body fat and losing muscle and I thought at first it must be my hormones right like that's the natural thought and when you're in your 40s I'm 44 right now. So I, I just, you know finally started to learn what was actually going on and at first I really fought it because I was frustrated by the fact that here I am showing up as a as a trainer and my body isn't looking the way that I've been able to to create it to be, but I had to really question that in myself because I'm like, you know, I'm still strong, my body is amazing and once I became like an ally and supported my body in what it was doing to actually help me deal with the mold and even as I started to get better. And I realized that I had a better truer message to share with my own women that were looking to me for like guidance right because I'm like my body like any woman's body goes through stuff like we're going to struggle we're going to get sick. I mean, some, some, some body fat but let me look at what is the opportunity within that for me to learn something about a how I've been perceiving myself in the first place, and be what is this body fat here to help me with you know like that was, that was great for me, I also recognize that without the resilience that I had already built all the healthy practices I built into my life with my four pillars for example, I wouldn't have been as healthy going through the journey of detoxing from the extra load on my system. So I think that there was a lot there for me to unpack even though I felt like I'd gotten to a really healthy place mentally about my body I was used to my body shifting throughout the year I gained weight lost weight gained body fat lost body fat in a sort of a cyclical seasonal shifts throughout the year which felt good to me I was I wasn't like mad at myself when I had more more body fat, but this was scary because I gained body fat and I had no control over the, you know what was happening internally that's what was scary for me, and feeling like there was something really wrong with me I didn't know, you know, this was a symptom my body was talking to me. So, I had to really get on board with what that process was, learn as much as I could, and and support myself in that process, and I think that it's really easy to beat ourselves up when we don't meet our own expectation of how we think we're supposed to look or what we think we're supposed to be doing in our life or how much money we think we're supposed to be making there's a lot of ways we can stress ourselves out, not just around body image but around our own image or perception and expectation of who we think we're supposed to be and how we think we're supposed to look. We have like again these are things that are hidden in plain sight from us we have to become aware that that's what's stressing us out and and try to shift the framework around it to see the opportunity within what we have, and what we are willing to do about it, and also, you know, what, what, what are the gifts within that situation. Thank you for sharing that. And again, my list there's no majority with mold same thing, the waking the things are so confusing and I shared a little when I interviewed on your show but part of my journey was I had cancer and Crohn's and this was all fighting. And I remember really thinking through those just 20 years ago now, I was so angry because I felt like my body betrayed me. I had this like anger I didn't even know it I wasn't aware of it but like for all those years I was like so angry because like my mind is strong and I'm doing all the right things like I was voted in my high school yearbook, healthiest, you know, most healthy, you know senior whatever so like I had this like from very young this health conscious mindset, so I was like why me of all people, but that didn't help and then the shift happened with the mold when like you said, mold in particular makes us fell out of control because it sabotages everything we know to be true about our bodies and it's like, What is this body what's happening I would have these three plus pinning a demon like elephant ankles, I couldn't wear dresses for two years like it, and I was so ashamed, and I still started in that journey being so like why is my body betraying me. But guess what that mindset didn't help me heal it actually made it worse. And when I started understanding that, and I started like the first with tears rolling down my face like oh my gosh thank you. Thank you for talking to myself. Thank you for taking me through these and like, I shouldn't be alive I shouldn't have gotten through these things that you have been strong and capable and on this journey with me and every time you bounce back. So I started loving myself instead of having shame and fear and all these things I started actually using love to heal and partnering with my body instead of being like, Oh, come on like get with it because I had that you know everything else is a fight in it and I had to start loving everything but I had to shift that mentality and start loving body. And guess what. Now I'm really happy I'm fit I'm mostly detox from mold but I had to start loving it when I hated the shape I was in like I had to start this love when I had the fat ankles and the horrible skin if I'd show you pictures I mean I look like a leper with the acne and the breakouts and all that. And I had to actually start the love when I didn't feel like very lovable. And so important that I think is maybe your last point that I'll let you kind of end. We as women so often are love for our performance or for our showing up or for these things that aren't really true authentic unconditional love and so we get this idea that we're only lovable if we're showing up before performing if we're in tip top shape. And it's not like for you to these core issues if we feel like we're only worthy of love in a certain physical shape or certain how we show up in the world. It's no wonder we have massive stress and internal conflict because we can't show up like that all the time, but most of the time we just show up humanly. And guess what I've always said you know the things that are imperfections are what makes us the most lovable. Now I say that but did I believe it. I don't think so. I've started to really now I do believe that it's those things that make us quirky, make us a little weird. Those are the things that make us the most fun and lovable. Yeah. Anyway, you just set it up, you just set it up for me to talk about Flossom I know that's what awesome. No perfect. And with like what do you have to. Yeah, I just want to say that that's so beautifully put in just like talking about, you know why those core issues can stress us up and the worthiness pieces. And they're all part of it and just being able to grace gracefully self examine and, and, you know, think about that but one of the things I that really helped me a lot was just knowing I'm awesome, and I'm accepting accept that I have flaws, and I feel awesome. And so I love that word Flossom because to me that just like sums it up, you know, like, embrace your flaws know your work in progress and you don't have to be perfect all the time. Like, I believe we are perfect as we are. And yet, that's not a daily use word that we feel about ourselves so if we can just say yes I have my flaws and I'm also awesome. Embrace your Flossom, you know, your life. That's it. Love it. So where can people find you tell us about the programs that people have found so helpful tell us more about, because people are dying to I'm sure join. They're all stored up here in this gigantic one that I'm wearing actually. Yeah, I'm a who from who. I was thinking about. So, obviously you can find me on Instagram at the Betty rocker.com you can find me on Facebook at the Betty rocker and of course I've got a website just packed with great sources and information just like Jill does. Really, like I'm just really enjoy putting out content with tons of free workout videos that you can do from home. Really accessible, delicious healthy easy recipes. I'm all about quick easy recipes that are also made with whole foods and lots of really great content there's some really important articles on my website about how to train with your cycle if you're interested in that a lot of really good content pieces but you know I've got eating guides meal plans to help you use those three styles we talked about the batch minimal and hybrid got workout programs that you can do from home or with just a little equipment at home. And of course rock your life which is the heart of everything I do my online women's fitness community and we have tons of challenges that you can do and we have new classes all week long over 1000 in the class library so you can stop drop and Betty rock wherever you are. Oh my gosh, I love it. Thank you as I knew it just like it feels like it just went by in like three minutes and here we are at the end of the hour, but thank you so much for your time, I know you're busy and I'm honored to have you I'm honored to collaborate with you and just, I'm so grateful for what you're doing in the for the image consciousness you're bringing to women around the floss some philosophy versus just having this other idea of perfection so thanks for all you're doing and thank you again for your time today. I'm never too busy for you. And thank you so much for having me thank you all for being a part of the conversation.