 Okay, so the hookup culture has pretty much taken over not only in America, but all over the world. And it's come to this place where a lot of people are going for short-term satisfaction over long-term fulfilling relationships. So the question that we're asking here is, does this work for women? I think, in my opinion, if you want a real relationship, a real long-term relationship, my suggestion is that you should stop hooking up and stop sleeping around. I don't think it's really good for you. Ultimately, I don't think it's really good for men or women. I don't think it's good for anyone. There are some benefits to it, right? We can't sit here and pretend like there aren't any benefits. There are some things that you can get out of it, right? Like, it can immediately get some of your needs fulfilled. It can make you feel better about yourself and your body image. It can make you feel wanted. It can be fun and exciting and get a lot of emotions going for you. But in my opinion, the costs of doing this actually outweigh all of the benefits for most women, especially if long-term you want something real, which I think most women do. I think most people do. And this, in my opinion, gets in the way. And so what are the reasons why I think that you should stop sleeping around? We're going to get to them right now. So my name is Matthew Coast, and welcome to Commitment Connection. And if you're really serious about getting into an amazing relationship where you are loved and seen and valued as a woman by a great man, then make sure you head over to the foreverwomanformula.com, or there should be a link in the description above or below this video. So what are some of the reasons I think that it's a really bad idea to be a part of this hookup culture that's going on out there right now? So the number one reason I think that this is a really, really bad idea is that most women fall in love with their casual hookup that they're hanging out with. A lot of women have this idea where when they fall in love, they're like, oh, well, that's all that matters. And so they get single focused on this guy. And they're unable to really separate their physical intimacy from their feelings of falling in love and wanting something more. And so it can get really, really messy really quickly because they might have an agreement that it's just going to be something casual, but she's falling in love and she wants something more. Our community that we have is filled to the brim with women who are in it, in friend with benefits situations, trying to get something more out of a guy. And what they find and what the studies have found is that that usually only happens when people try, when people are actually trying to do it, it only happens one out of nine times. That is a very low number for people that are trying to do this. And so a lot of the women in our community will end up finding that they don't end up getting into good relationships with these guys because the guy's not interested in that because he's better at separating his emotions from physical intimacy. And so he's like, hey, I'm not interested. We had this agreement and she's like, well, maybe if I keep doing, he shows me that he loves me and he acts like he wants to be in a relationship and he has me meet his friends and his family and he buys me things and he takes me on vacations and stuff like that. And what we found is that guys will do all of that stuff and still not feel like he wants a relationship or that he thinks of her as anything more than a friend with benefits. And that's why you shouldn't do it because if you get those feelings, which most women tend to do, then you will end up having this situation where you're just going to be really, really heartbroken. And so if you do end up getting into a friend with benefits casual situation, my suggestion is as soon as you start feeling anything, anything really deep that you leave, which can be really, really hard to do because it feels so good, right? And so I mean, I just I can't tell you how much I suggest that you don't do this. It's just such a bad idea in so many different ways. Just from that one standpoint, the second one, number two, the second reason is because of something called sunken cost theory. And what sunken cost theory is, is this idea that when you invest in something, you don't want to let go of it. And what ends up happening when you get into friend with benefits situations with guys is that a guy ends up getting all of his needs met. And so he doesn't necessarily feel like he needs to exert a lot of effort into the situation anymore because he's already getting a lot of his needs met. And so women that are in these situations where it's just kind of a fling and it's just kind of a hookup and the guy isn't doing a lot of investing. What she'll end up doing because one of the things we talk about is like, okay, well, you're going to have to walk away from this. And if he wants to stay with you, then he'll end up coming over and being like, no, no, no. I do want a real relationship with you like, let's do this. But if he hasn't been investing at all, he's definitely not going to do that. And even if he has been investing a lot, if he's really emotionally broken, he still probably won't do it. And so it's just, it's a bad idea from that standpoint. He needs to be investing a lot. He needs to be spending time, emotion, energy into investing in you so that he feels like this is a real relationship. He feels like it's something that he doesn't want to let go of. He feels like he's committed to it. And that's what it takes for him to feel like he's committed is for him to invest in you. If you get what I'm talking about here in the chat, say, I get it. I get what you're saying. If you don't get what I'm saying, then go ahead and leave a question in the chat and we can talk about it. Number three, third reason, I know we're not even on the third reason yet. I think you already have enough, but let's move on to the third reason. The third reason is that you skip the entire dating process, which is a problem. I know a lot of people, obviously they're like, Hey, I don't want to go through the dating process. I just want to go to meeting a guy and being in a relationship, which makes a lot of sense, right? Because it can be really frustrating going on all these dates with guys and it's like, Oh, I got to figure this out. And he's got these red flags and all this stuff, right? However, if you skip the dating process, what do you miss? You can end up missing giant red flags that are waving in front of your face. We were just talking about it yesterday in the live stream. You can end up losing out on this place where he's trying to impress you because he sees you as this valuable woman that he wants to impress and he wants to make you feel good and he wants to do all these things because he's trying to get into this relationship. But you skip all that out because you're just like, Oh, yeah, let's hook up, right? And he never ends up investing in you and trying to impress you and emotionally engaging with you in those ways. The next one is you can get slotted into the friend with benefits category permanently with a guy who might have wanted something more with you. It's true, right? Some guys, they put you into different categories and if you're just like, Hey, let's just hook up. Even if it's the first time, even if you're a virgin when you got to this, right? Guys are going to look at you when you do that and they're going to think in their minds, she does this all the time. And you're going to say, I never do this and he's going to think, Yeah, right. And this happens all the time. I hear it from guys. I hear it from women. I hear it from everybody. And if he slots you into that category, if he's like, Oh, well, she's not the kind of girl that I'd be looking for in a relationship because guys look for certain things in a relationship and one of those things is not, she hooks up with every dude, right? And if he feels like you're that kind of a girl, then there's a much higher probability chance that he's going to think that you're going to do that in a relationship or that you're not faithful or that you're not loyal or that you do, you just do it a lot and it might end up happening to him. If you guys are end up in a relationship and he might end up slotting you into this not relationship material category, which can be a big problem if you end up wanting to get into a relationship with him later on. And you can also end up feeling really used by this, right? Like you could be in this situation and he's not taking care of your needs. He doesn't really care about your needs. He doesn't, all these different things, right? Cause you're just hooking up and that's, that's how he feels about it. He's like, Hey, this is just physical. And so a lot of women end up coming back and they're like, well, now I just feel like I've been used for the last three weeks, three months, three years, you know, 10 years. We have women in our community that have been in friend with benefits situations for up to 17 years where the guy still doesn't want anything more and they're still chasing after it, hoping that it'll one day because they're, they've got that sunken cost theory going in where they've spent so much time and energy and effort with this guy that they're like, I don't want to let him go, right? But they're stuck in it because the guy's like, I've never seen her that way. And I still don't see her that way. And it's just really, really sad. And then number four is actually, this is going to be a really controversial thing that I'm about to say. And I'm going to say it anyway. And I don't really care that it's controversial because there's a lot of evidence that backs it up. And it's that the more partners that you have, the less likely that you are to be faithful. And there's a few different studies that were done. One was done by the twin research and genetic epidemiology, you're not totally butchering words over here, St. Thomas Hospital in London, they tested the genetic versus environmental factors of having certain numbers of partners and its, its connection to infidelity. And what they found is that the more partners that you've had, the more likely that you are to cheat. And they found that the journal, the, there's another journal that, that did some studies on this. The Journal of Family Psychology reported a study where they found that there's a 7% increase in the probability of infidelity per additional partner that a woman has. And what, I've actually talked to a few different dating coaches about this. I talked to some dating coaches on the men's side. And one of the things that they were telling me is that what they've experienced with women is that they see that a lot of women, when they have less partners, they look at, they look at physical intimacy more as like a sacred act, right? And the more partners that they have, the less they look at it as a sacred act. And the more they look at it as just some kind of hedonistic, like pleasurable experience in and of itself that you can just have with anybody and it's not really that big of a deal and it doesn't really matter that much. And so they've pair bonded so many times and it's kind of broken, they've broken up so many times and had that heartbreak that they've actually somehow, like, actually, mentally kind of separated the two, almost like how a lot of guys are when it comes to physical intimacy versus emotional intimacy. And so a lot of women end up getting into this space where they're more likely to cheat. There's actually another study, I don't have it here with me right now, where they found that there's always been these kind of studies about men and women cheating out there and men have always been leading women in the cheating category, right? By a few percentage points always. And what they're finding now because of this hookup culture is that women are almost at the same level of cheating as men are in relationships. And so and I'm not surprised by it at all just because there's so many people just hooking up with each other all the time. So tell me what you think. What do you think? Do you think that the hookup culture is bad for us? Do you think that sleeping around is bad for women? Let me know what you think. I'm really curious to hear what you think in the chat. Just tell me what you think. Do you think it's good? Do you think it's bad? Let me know. And so I'm going to go back over that. And if you have any questions about any of the stuff that we just talked about, or if you have any questions about your situation, make sure you post it in the chat, I actually this is actually my favorite part of doing these live streams is interacting with our community and our audience out there. I just I don't know. I just really love it. And it's funny because I know a lot of coaches that hate doing this stuff. They don't like answering comments, replying to comments, talking to people in their audience and in their communities. And I just think it's crazy because it's literally my favorite thing to do. And so if you have any questions or anything, make sure that you put them in the comments section. We'll get to them here in a minute. So I'm just going to go back over everything real quick. Four reasons I think you should stop sleeping around one, falling in love with your friend with benefits. Two, sunken cost theory because he doesn't end up investing. Three, you end up skipping the dating process, which as much as it might be painful to go through the dating process, which it shouldn't be necessarily if you're enjoying it and you're having fun and you're letting go of all your expectations. What you ended up doing is you miss out on a whole bunch of really important things. Number four is it actually makes it so that for you, you're less likely to end up being faithful in your relationship, the more partners that you end up having. So that's it for the content. What kind of questions and comments are we going to get in here? Jules says, thank you for covering an important topic. You're welcome. You're welcome. Ju Ting, who says, you're the best, Matt. Goddess shouldn't sleep around in my own opinion. I agree. Charmaine says, hello, big brother, hello, hello, little sister. I'm the big, I'm the big brother of, I'm your big brother in dating here, teaching you guys what's going on from a big brother standpoint, right? That's kind of how I feel about it anyway. Sue says, how are you feeling? I'm feeling amazing. Didi says, did this just start a couple of minutes ago? Probably. Lots of people get it. Lots of people get it. Ju Ting, who says, online dating is so stressful. Yeah. Honestly, I suggest that you don't do online dating unless you absolutely have to. Most people don't have to. And I think that you're better off doing meeting guys in person. I'm actually going to be doing a live stream here pretty soon on the best way, where to meet guys and how to meet guys in person because I think it's, you're far more likely to get better prospects for dating and relationships if you meet guys in person as opposed to online. Not that you can't meet great guys online. There's great guys online. I know people, they're women in our community that have gotten married from meeting guys on Tinder. It can happen for sure. People's spots said, I always ask guys what they want from me. Some are honest. Some are not. What I do give the dishonest guys a trial when I do not feel comfortable, I'm out. Okay. Mary says, I got what you're saying, Janice. Hello. Didi, does the study about having more partners also apply to men or just women? It's actually just women, believe it or not. What they found is that there's no big correlation between men and the number of partners that they have and increasing their likelihood of infidelity. But it does with women, although I have seen some studies that show that guys that are more likely to, that are players and have been cheating are more likely to cheat, but those are guys that have already been cheating for a while at that point probably. Kim says, I think you shouldn't be sleeping around. Awesome. I agree. Sue says, I agree. Kim says, I think you should save yourself for that someone special. Didi says, I think the hookup culture is bad for everyone. Men are used to getting it easily and get stayed because there is a girl out there willing to put out. Yeah, I mean, it kind of goes both ways. There's actually a study that was done about younger men recently where they found that the men under the, I think it's under the age of 35 or something, are actually having sex way less than ever before. They found that I think it was around like, oh, it was 26 percent, 26 percent of men, which is the highest number ever recorded in history of men haven't had sex, have been celibate for over a year, right? And that number increased, I think it used to be like 14 percent or something like that. The number for women also increased. It went from around 14 to I think it was like 18 or something like that. But for men, if you meet men, one in four of them haven't hooked up in a year, right? And so you think, oh, guys are just like, it's so easy for guys to go out there and hook up nowadays. It's not easier for all guys. It's easier for players. It's easier for narcissists. It's easier for guys that are constantly going out and are really good at playing with women's emotions. It's easier for those guys because it's easier for guys that are like really incredibly good-looking. When I used to be in the men's dating industry, I think this is kind of interesting. We did a study at one point. It wasn't really a study. It was more like just a game. We took a really, really good-looking man's picture and we created a Tinder account for him. We had two accounts, right? Like a regular guy and a guy that was ridiculously good-looking. We did a bunch of swiping with both of them. We took the guy that was really good-looking and we had him messaging all these women. What ended up happening was when you're the guy that's really good-looking on Tinder, you can basically say anything. The guys that were actually doing the messaging for this, they would say just crazy stuff. Just like they'd make fun of the girl. They'd just say something that's really weak and pathetic and just act super needy and desperate and stuff. The women were just all over it. You notice with the guy that was just average looking, it was like he had really hard time even getting to the space where the girl was even interested in going on a date with him at all. What's ended up happening, especially with these dating apps, is that it's not easier for all guys now to meet and hook up. It's easier for guys that are really good-looking to hook up and guys that are really good at talking to women. Those guys are hooking up with lots and lots and lots of women, lots of them. The guys that are more normal, more average, it's actually harder for them to meet and hook up with women now because the look standard is so much higher. A lot of women are raising their standards for who they want to hook up with, but it's not like, is this a good guy? The standard that they're raising is, does he make me laugh? Does he make me feel good inside? Am I attracted to him? Which is normal. That's what we think. When we go on a date, it's like, am I attracted to this person? Do I feel good about this person? They don't think, is he a good guy? Because if he's a good guy, that's fine, but it doesn't matter if he can't make you feel really good. If he can't go on a date with you and be entertaining and make you feel good about yourself and say the right things and not come off creepy or like he's too much, but also not be too distant and have a conversation with you. Women value communication really, really highly in the way that they interact with a guy. Is he a good guy? Okay, I'm interested in him. Does he make me feel butterflies? Do I feel really good around him? Do I feel comfortable? Am I excited about him? Is he saying the right things? That's what makes a woman want to hook up with a guy. She feels excitement, she feels comfort, and then she feels this physical draw to him. If he plays his cards right, which guys that play their cards right are usually players and narcissists and guys that are really good at messing with your emotions, most good guys are not like that at all. They don't know how to do that. They have no idea how to play with your emotions and make you feel good. A lot of really good guys are not getting laid right now. They're not hooking up. They're not a part of the hookup culture because they're spending their time doing other things. They're working their jobs. They're living their lives. They're not running around hooking up with girls. They don't understand how it works. That's when they end up coming over to the men's dating side and learning about it. For men, one of the things I talk about to a lot of women about the men's dating journey is that a lot of times it's a really long journey. When you come to the women's side, we're like, oh, here's what you do. You stop chasing him. You lean back. You have fun. You get playful. On the men's dating side, it's like, okay, you need to go and develop your personality. You need to go get and learn about your passions and get an awesome job and start figuring out your life. Sometimes they'll recommend taking acting classes and stuff and improv classes just to get them out of their bodies and get them into their emotions. They learn how to talk and sometimes they'll send them to comedy courses and stuff like that. That's what men do who are trying to become more attractive to women is that they go through this huge journey of developing their personalities and becoming stronger, better men, developing their getting into their masculinity and learning how to become a leader and all this kind of stuff. Not to say that women aren't doing a lot of work for themselves in this space. We all have issues and we all have problems and stuff, but it's hard for everybody. That's really what it boils down to is that there's a very small number of players at the top and they're hooking up with massive amounts of women. Their challenge is that there's this hookup culture and there's all these players and these players are really good at making you feel really good and you have to distinguish whether this guy's a player, whether he's a good guy, whether he's been developing himself as a man and now he's finally gotten to the space where he's a man, but he's looking for something real. Does he want something real with you and not just saying, hey, I want something real, which most guys want something real, but does he want, are you that potential real that he's looking for? It's a jungle out there for most people and I totally went off on a tangent there, but I just wanted to talk about that a little bit because a lot of women are like, oh, it's so easy for guys to go run out there and hook up and it's not. It's not easy for most guys to go out there and hook up. For most guys, they aren't running around hooking up. Most guys are like, I just want a girl that'll be my girlfriend. We can get into a relationship. I hope to God she's amazing. That way I don't have to go out and meet any other women ever again because it sucks. It takes tons of time. If you're going out as a guy and meeting women, you might go and meet a hundred women and out of that hundred women, one of them will be your girlfriend. That's the odds for the average dude who's never learned about dating advice or any of that kind of stuff before, who's not a player, any of that kind of stuff. He has to go and approach somewhere between maybe 80 and 100 women in order to get to a girl that wants to be his girlfriend or who has the potential of becoming his girlfriend. With women, it's like when you go out and you talk to a guy, if you say something stupid, he's going to be like, okay, well, I don't think that she's relationship material anymore, but we can hook up. As a guy, if I come out to a girl and I start talking to her and I say something stupid, she's like, I'm shutting them down altogether, and he can go off somewhere else and find somebody else. It's a different dynamic depending on which side you're on, and it's difficult for both sides because there's so many challenges and difficulties out there on both sides. The hookup culture and these apps have just amplified all of those challenges. I think over time, it's going to end up evening out and we're going to end up figuring it out, but I think it's going to take some time and we're just clearly not there yet. Okay, so what other questions do we have? So DD says, I think the hookup culture is bad for everyone, that was the one that I just read. Joel says, yeah, get yourself a vibrator, learn how to pleasure yourself and don't sleep with a guy until you're confirmed exclusive with each other. I agree, not only exclusive, but also figuring out what he wants and making sure that he's in a good space. If you want something more, if you're like, hey, I want to ultimately be in something real, you need to make sure that he's got good intentions and that he's coming from a good space. And it can take time. It can take months before somebody really starts letting down their guard and starts showing off who they actually are. So it can take time. And my suggestion is that you don't just go out and hook up. Cool spot said guys are always attracted to me sexually, not emotionally, and I am tired. I know I am beautiful. I try not to dress too sexually, but it is the same results. What do I do? Well, that's a good question and it depends. It depends on what you're doing right now. See what you said is that you know you're beautiful and that guys want to hook up with you, but they're not emotionally attracted to you. And then you say, I try not to dress too sexually, right? So you're not talking about anything that you're actually doing. You're talking about your body and your looks. And that's only one component to it and that's just the physical component. A guy needs to be physically interested, sexually interested in you in order for him to want to get to the emotional interest, right? That's what gets his interest is he sees you and he's like, oh, I'm interested in her. And if he doesn't feel that, he never gets to that. And it's your job to hold him back and say, okay, what's going on here? It's your job to make sure that you're connecting with him in a way that he's feeling emotionally connected to you. I've done a bunch of different live streams on this about I'm going to be doing another live stream on it. If you really want to figure this stuff out really, really well, my suggestion is that you go to the foreverwomanformula.com. There should be a link below this below or above this video. You can go get that program. It's my system for how to do this and you can get it for free. So go to that link and check it out and get it for free. There's no reason not to have that. I talk all about emotional relevancy in that program. I talk about how to connect with a guy. I talk about how to kind of build sexual tension and emotional tension through that program and making sure that you're doing it right. So go and check that out. Jeanette said, where to meet guys in person will be a great topic. Yes, it will. It'll be an absolutely great topic. Zhou Tinghu, I hope I'm saying that right. Yes, definitely please help, Matt, because I am a single mom. So no much time. The only option was online and I am slowly giving it up now. Yeah, it can be frustrating online because there's a lot, you know, it's like all of a sudden online, you're getting all these people that normally wouldn't do stuff, right? You normally wouldn't ever meet them. All of a sudden they're all online from all over the place from every single and they don't have to go. You don't guys don't have to go out and approach women anymore in order to meet women. And so a lot of people just do the online thing. If they can get away with it, a lot of them can't. And a lot of the guys that can't just don't do anything or they just try to just push towards doing something physically intimate as quickly as possible because they know that that's their best chance at getting into a relationship with any woman. So Rahul says, I think that's your name, says love from India. Can you make a detailed video on foot fetish? And boy love trampled by heels of curl for satisfaction. Well, our expert on doing that kind of stuff, I'll talk to her about it and see if she wants to do something like that. I think she made a video about foot stuff actually recently. You might want to go check out the channel and see if she did. Didi says, Matt, when you guys say guys need to invest, does that mean money too? Well, money isn't a bad thing. It can be a good thing. The reason I don't say money when I talk about stuff is because a lot of people can focus on that. And then it's like, oh, how much money is he spending on me when that shouldn't really necessarily be a focus? But it can work that way as well. However, what you really want is for him to be investing in other ways as well. So you want him to spend time with you. You want him to emotionally connect with you. You want him to put effort in to meeting you and going out of his way and doing things for you, which is some of the stuff that I talk about where I talk. There's this kind of technique that I talk about where you ask a guy for help. And so there's this kind of this thing going on in our community right now where a lot of women are like, well, I just want to lean back and it's, is it feminine to send him a message? And it's like, there's a lot of things that you can do if you're coming from a space of being confident and you're coming from a space of feeling feminine. There's a lot of things that you can do that people wouldn't, that we wouldn't normally recommend because most of the women in our community aren't coming from that space, which is why they're in our community. They're coming from a space of feeling insecure and feeling like they're not good enough and feeling and being in their masculine and chasing guys and doing all this stuff. And so we give them strategies and techniques like leaning back and sometimes they end up taking it too far because it's, because they don't understand it, they don't understand the dynamics and they haven't been doing it long enough or they end up feeling better about themselves, they end up getting more confident and then they do it and it doesn't work because once you're feeling confident, once you're coming from a feminine space, all of a sudden you don't need to lean back so much anymore because it turns into more of a partnership instead of a, I'm trying to get him to invest in me to do all these things. But one of the things I talk about is asking a guy for help and having him come and do things for you and with you so that he's putting energy and effort into hanging out with you and to doing things for you and to being with you and that can make him feel invested in the situation. So say you've got a lot of chilled days, drinks, burgers, beach, nothing fancy. I mean, you don't need to have him take you on something fancy. You don't need him to spend a bunch of money on you although that can make him feel invested. What the sunken cost theory comes from, the original kind of thing that I learned about it from was investing. So when people, they'll spend a lot of time learning about a stock and they'll do all this research into stock investing and they'll end up going, okay, this is the right stock and they'll find a stock and they'll be like, this is it. This is the stock, it's gonna blow up and I'm gonna make tons and tons of money from it and then in investing, what you're supposed to do is you buy in and then if it goes down, if the stock goes down past a certain point, you're supposed to take all your money out, right? And what happens a lot of times with people that do all this research is they'll put their money in and then the stock goes down and it keeps going down and they're like, no, no, no, I did all the research. This is the right stock and the stock keeps going down and down and down and they're like, no, but I'm not gonna take my money out because I've put so much into this and stock keeps going down until eventually sometimes it'll completely bottom out and they'll lose all their money and they're like, but it was supposed to work, right? And the reason that they clung onto it is because they put all this energy and effort into it, right? And this thought process and they did all the research and they were certain about it, right? And that makes it so that they don't wanna let go of it and it's kind of the same process psychologically with a relationship or with somebody that they're with is if he's like, spending all this time with you and he's connecting with you and he's going around and telling his friends about how much he likes you and oh my God, I met this amazing girl and his friends are making fun of him and he's like, no, no, no, but this girl is different. This girl is amazing. I've never met a girl like her before and she's just so awesome and we go and spend this time together and all this stuff, right? And in his mind, he's like, I know that she's great and she's amazing and I'm putting all this energy and effort into her. He's gonna come out and if you do something, if you start showing your vulnerabilities and you do something dumb or you wave a red flag in his face or something, he's more likely to be like, you know what? I don't care, you know? Because she's awesome and I know that we have such an awesome connection and she's different than all the other women that I've met and I really like her and I wanna stay with her, right? And he's more likely to do that when he's invested like that than if he isn't invested at all and you guys are just hooking up and all of a sudden he's ghosting on you and it's no big deal. And a lot of the situations that we, sometimes we have women that come in and they're like, well, what about the guys that have been like, you know, we've been in a relationship for 12 years and he ended up leaving me. And you know, what I have to say about that is usually those scenarios or sometimes there'll be a guy that's married to a woman and they have kids together and they've been together for 12, 15 years and all of a sudden he leaves and the woman's like, well, what about this? And the reason that that happens a lot of times is it's not immediate. It's not like, oh, I'm just gonna give up on all this stuff. He had probably been feeling bad for a really long time and he was hoping that it would have changed and it never did. And so what ended up happening was he might have been invested in all this stuff but the feeling of being in that situation got to a point where it felt like it would be better to give up and go off on something else. And a lot of times if he's been that invested in it it takes a lot of pain in order for a man to leave because men typically don't just leave relationships. Most men that are committed to a relationship they'll put their head down and they'll just deal with it and they'll keep going. And so if a guy ends up leaving a lot of times is because what was going on in that situation in that relationship for him was so incredibly painful that he just couldn't do it anymore and he had to go somewhere, for him he felt like he had to go somewhere else. And obviously it depends on the situation and the guy and all that kind of stuff. So Jeanette says, have no desire to sleep around after what just happened plus it's not a good idea, this hookup culture if you really want that great close relationship. Yes, Tammy says, hi, you're amazing. Thank you for sharing all your knowledge and wisdom. I get it 100%, you're welcome. Thank you for being a part of our community, Tammy. Appreciate you being here. Oh, did I already go over this stuff? Ria says, having sex with a phone has a similar effect as hooking up. Well, no, it's different. It's different because of the pair bonding, right? Like you're not getting the same chemical connection that you get from physical intimacy. But I'd have to look at some research on all of that. I don't know what the exact, what exactly happens from that. I'd have to look at some research around that. I don't know it. Lulip says, I turned down anyone who offers a hookup or friend with benefits. Bye, boy. That's the way you should do it. That's the way you should do it. Just let somebody else deal with that. Margaret says, I have never slept around and I find the thought disgusting. All right. Sissy says, hey, hey, Sissy. Lulip says, I think it's bad for both sexes. I believe it makes you so insensitive to real love. Yeah, I mean, it's a problem for men too. It's a problem for men too, for sure. And it also kind of creates this scenario where a lot of people are just like constantly trying to level up, right? And so instead of like being with this person, they're like, oh, is there something out there? They're always one foot out of the door where they're like, hey, is there something else out there that I'm missing? You know, there's so much stuff going on. It's so interesting. And it can be a problem for a lot of people, both men and women. Calm Angel says, what a lovely topic. Okay. So Yvonne says, online dating is scary, done it and been scammed. Yeah, you gotta be careful. Make sure you're not getting into a bad situation. There's, I'm gonna be doing a video here pretty soon about how to make sure that you don't get scammed. Cool spot says, thank you for your time. What do you say about using matchmaking agencies? You know, I haven't really heard that many good things about matchmaking agencies, to be honest. I know a friend of mine is, he helped found a matchmaking agency, but, and I know that people find people through that. So I don't know, it could be something. I don't know too many people that have used matchmaking agencies, to be honest. I don't know what their success rates are. I don't know how that goes really. It's, you'd have to, it's really, from what I've heard, it's really dependent on the matchmaker, right? Some matchmakers are really good and some of them aren't. And you just have to really find somebody that is really good at doing that. So Quinn says, what is the best way to overcome the masculine energy whenever we feel the empty space and feel the need to fill it? Well, you can get friends. You know, if that's what you're talking about, like how can you find, like how can you be in that space of masculine energy? There's a lot of guys that wanna be friends, that wanna be in the feminine energy, that wanna be around feminine energy because it makes them feel good about themselves and it makes them feel just, it makes them feel nurtured, it makes them feel cared for and they're willing to just hang out with women, if that's what you're talking about. Dee Dee says, Matt, you're one of my favorite coaches. I appreciate your real talk. You're welcome. I'm glad that I am one of your favorite coaches. Quinn says, you're so handsome. I appreciate that. Appreciate that. All right, so thank you everybody for being here. Again, I wanna mention, if you haven't gone and gotten the Forever Woman program, go to theforeverwomanformula.com. There's a link in the either below this video or above the video where you can go and get that. So my suggestion, it's free. You can go get it for free. There's no reason not to go and get that program. It's all about how to make sure that you get into a situation where you're loved and cherished and seen by a great guy and a great relationship. So go check that out. Sissy said, I totally think that it would be great if you made a video about the best places to meet good guys. Yeah, I think you'll, I am gonna do a video about that and I think you'll be a little surprised about what I say. Cool spot says, I was charged 20K Euro as registration fee from a matchmaking agency. Well, I hope that they got you some kind of result that you wanted because that's a lot of money to spend for a matchmaking agency. I don't think I would spend that kind of money on a matchmaking agency unless they had a guarantee that you were going to either find somebody or they're gonna give you a good chunk of your money back because that's a lot of money to spend on a matchmaking agency and then not end up with something. Although, I guess that might be kind of difficult because they'd be like, oh, well, you know, if you're crazy, what are we gonna do about it? But they should be screening for that beforehand. So I don't know. So thank you everybody for being here. It was great kind of chatting. I hope that you got a lot out of this video. I think that it's an important topic. I think it's important that we talk about it. There was a woman that got on one of our videos and she commented saying that it's not, it's not like there's some kind of like misogynistic thing around it where men are like trying to like keep women down or something by telling them not to sleep around and that it's really healthy for women. And I was just like, I don't think that you know what you're talking about. You should come and check out our community that is filled with women, completely filled with women to the brink who are in friend with benefits situations who are hurting very badly right now because they want something real with a guy who doesn't want something real with them because they ended up falling in love with a guy who they agreed to only be hookup buddies with. So my suggestion is that you don't do it, don't do it. I mean, obviously it leads a lot of women to our community. So I mean, it's good for business, but it's bad for you. And so my suggestion is that you don't do it. I don't need, I want women to come to our community. You know, I wish women came to our community because they were just like, yeah, I just have such great relationships and I want to help other women. So let me find a really great coach and help with that. But usually most women come because they're going through some kind of pain. They don't, women aren't coming to our work because they're in a great relationship and they don't need anything. They come because they're having problems. And one of the big problems that a lot of women are facing is this whole thing where they're stuck in friend with benefits situations. So that's it, all right? I will do another live stream here pretty soon on a bigger topic. So maybe we'll have a lot more people on the video asking questions and stuff. So thank you everybody for being here and I appreciate you and I appreciate you being the best part of our community. We're really, I'm here to help empower you to give you the tools that you need in order to have the relationship that you've always wanted to have. Make sure once again you go over to the foreverwomanformula.com link in the description, check it out, it's free. There's no reason that you shouldn't have that program and shouldn't go through it. It is designed to help make sure that you get into a great situation with a guy where you are loved and valued and cherished. So thank you so much for being here and I will speak with you again.