 Hey Psych2Goers, welcome back to our channel. We wanted to let you know that each and every one of your comments, likes, and shares help support this channel in our goal to spread awareness about mental health and psychology. You help us make psychology and mental health more accessible to everyone. Thank you for your support. Now onto the video. Sweet, sweet love. At times, it seems we can't bear to be without it. Take it from my buddy Billy. He knows all about love due to his crush on Becca. That first glance of her eyes, the accidental touch as she walked by in class, that beautiful trip they both took to the Bahamas last summer, oh wait, that last part wasn't real. In fact, it was all a fantasy. Because my buddy Billy, he's suffering from the involuntary cognitive and emotional state which is limerence, a love addiction so strong that he can't help but fantasize about long walks on the beach with this crush, romantic evening dates, and her simply saying the words, I love you. To whom you may ask? To him. To Billy. So, what is limerence? Defined by psychologist Dorothy Teneuve, limerence is a mental state of intense romantic infatuation where one feels a strong romantic desire for another person, the limerent object. You may be thinking, isn't that just a crush? The limerence can often last months, years, or even a lifetime if not treated. It can both be joyous and emotionally painful depending on if the feelings are reciprocated. Limerence is characterized by the intrusive thoughts one can experience about their crush and the strong emotional arousal that can grow into an obsessive craving for another person, even if most of your time spent with them is fantasized in your head. Limerence can often be mistaken as love or simply having a crush, so how would you know if you have it? There's more than one sign than simply fantasizing about being with your crush. Could you be just like Billy? Here are six signs you are stuck in the emotional state that is limerence. 1. Obsessively thinking about them You can't help but fall into the deep rabbit hole of fantasizing about what it would be like to simply take a romantic straw on the beach with them or engage in a deep conversation over pasta and raviolis. So much so that your work suffers from your distractions. You can barely eat as in longing and you can't get a blink of sleep. You simply think of them seemingly constantly, but when you don't, something on TV reminds you of them. An item at a store makes you think of them. A comment by a stranger jogs your memory of something they once said. They invade your thoughts and you can both take pleasure and pain in this. 2. Insecurity and or shyness in their presence So Billy is idly walking through the halls of his college's science building when it suddenly hits him. A strong shy feeling that's highly unlike him. What's worse, while he's usually confident, he can't help but feel a bit insecure. Why? His crush Becca has just approached him. She started talking and he's doing his very best to pay attention, but the smell of his armpit sweat isn't helping. When in the presence of the limerent object, one can exhibit feelings of shyness and insecurity. This often presents itself in physical discomfort, as well as excessive sweating, stammering, and a racing heart that doesn't seem to calm. 3. Putting them on a pedestal Billy can't help it, Becca's perfect. She has the perfect bronze hair, the most beautiful ocean blue eyes, and her intelligence is unmatched. Albert Einstein, you kidding? He's a joke compared to Becca. But this idea of Becca is likely overly heightened in Billy's eyes. I use the words likely, but uh, Albert Einstein, really? Someone suffering from limerence can often make an irrational positive evaluation of their partner or crush. They may think they are perfect in every way. The best personality, the most compatible, the idealistic partner with seemingly no flaws. When in reality, they have flaws like all the rest of us. The main issue may be you simply don't know them enough to find out what those imperfections may be. And if you have unrequited love, you may have a tougher time realizing this because they might not stick around you long enough for you to find out their flaws. 4. Emotional dependency You feel as though you're not complete when you are away from your partner or crush. It hurts when they're not around, and you feel ecstatic and euphoric when they are. You possess a strong urge to be around them all the time, and this desire can last throughout the day until you meet their gaze again. 5. Longing for reciprocation If they are indeed a crush, you go into the mood of despair when you know they don't feel the same way about you as you feel about them. But if they say they like you, you feel euphoric and a sense of elation. 6. Phantasizing reciprocation Do you spend a moment or two daydreaming about your crush? We know Billy does. Those who are going through a state of limerence may fantasize about spending time with their crush. They may also excessively fantasize about them reciprocating their feelings for them, through a romantic date, marriage, or future life together. An addictive form of romantic attraction, limerence has its highs as well as lows. One can seek relief from the harsh reality of their crush not feeling the same, but imagining they do. When experiencing limerence, one seeks the high of reciprocation. They simply imagine that reciprocation to relieve themselves from the aching sensation in their heart from their crush not feeling the same way about you. All Billy ever wanted was for his crush to care about him, as much as he cares for her. While daydreaming may provide relief, it is only short-lived, as he is only left to simply wake up. Poor Billy, it's best to mourn the loss of reciprocation and dating possibilities and accept the long-lived notion that there is indeed plenty of fish in the sea, but they won't be Becca. So do you relate to any of these signs? If so, what do you plan to do next? Share with us in the comments down below. Have you learned of their flaws and less romantic behaviors? When in doubt, a helpful trick is to just remember that tuna sandwich they ate at lunch, there's one way in and there's one way out. If you found this video helpful, don't forget to click the like button and share this video with someone who might need it. Subscribe to Psych2Go and hit the notification bell icon for more content like this. And as always, thanks for watching.