 Grace writes and again if you have a question write the word question or buy a super sticker Question what message is a man sending me when he is off and on with communication? The few dates we've had have been really communicative But then gets quiet his penis has not met my vagina yet. Yay Grace Okay, this is a very natural thing for many people to do let me or let me say this experience is not uncommon First off everybody. Can we agree? We're meeting total strangers today. We're meeting total strangers when you go on a 90% almost 90% of all first dates these days is Happening through an online connection the organic way of meeting is becoming the thing of the past It's just not happening as much by the way I made up the number, but it just seems really obvious today, especially with the pandemic So when you meet a total stranger someone, you know nothing about it takes time to get comfortable with someone to be So our communication could be one moment. We could be a man or woman could be craving femininity or masculinity It could be craving. Let me reframe that feminine. Okay. I want to actually I'm gonna stop right here and explain something Because I know a lot of you are hung up on the terms masculine and feminine energy Let me just differentiate masculine energy is doing and feminine energy is receiving I'm gonna repeat that and by the way every human should be operating from a place of Giving and receiving giving and receiving giving and receiving a really healthy person is like a yin yang sign They have a combined Capacity both give and receive. That's what I'm emotionally healthy person is it's not masculine or feminine It's actually an integration of being able to give a receipt now I just said something men seek femininity and what that means to say is They seek women that they can talk to Because men rarely can talk to their male friends about their emotions about their problems We're not allowed to talk about our emotions and problems with our male friends So men gravitate to women that femininity Simply because we know you have a capacity to listen to our problems So met a lot of men in the dating realm are simply trying to fill a hole inside of them This is why I highly recommend checking out the book Codependent no more codependent no more Men and women alike are succulent sucking on the nipple of dependency So why he's hot and cold is one moment. He needs your feminine energy in the next moment He doesn't need it. So he doesn't communicate. This is why it takes time to build the roots the deep roots of trust in a Relationship so you can actually be able to bond with one another This is why I say this in my coaching practice I teach you those those those questions to ask to build the roots of commitment the roots of trust and This is why it's happening because you're just a stranger to him grace It takes about a hundred hours of face-to-face time It takes about a hundred hours of face-to-face time to really get to know a person at level one at level one and Think about it. So how much you know hundred out and by the way that doesn't include Sleeping in the same bed that time doesn't count I'm talking a hundred hours of face-to-face time doing shared activities hobbies mutual interest and maybe even spending time with family and Friends, that's how you build the first layer of trust and so until that's been built people are going to be wishy-washy I know you've been sold on this narrative that men are chivalrous and they're just supposed to claim you and all you have To do is sit back in your feminine energy and these men will do all the work. That's a crock of shit Yes That does happen But a very small percentage of the time and you got to differentiate between the guys that are driven by Lost and limerence versus those guys who are actually going to lean into a healthy happy relationship So my hope is I Answered your question on this one as to why men go quiet and again This happens because you're both strangers to one another has this helped. I hope so