 1. Garbage. My dog monster is the best in the world. Fact. Dad says he's probably half dog, half mole, because he's so good at digging tunnels, mainly underneath our garden fence. He's really round, so it's a miracle he doesn't get stuck. I watched him do it once. He sat on the flower bed and stared at the wooden panels, as if he was trying to work out how to tackle them, and then he began to dig. Dirt flew from under his wagging tail, and then he did this weird shuffling along on his stomach thing, with his back legs flattened on either side. The next second, he was gone. When he escapes, he always heads to the same place, Mrs Banks' front garden. He charges at her garbage cans, knocks them over, and then, like a big furry vacuum cleaner, gobbles everything up. And I mean everything. He threw up a pair of underwear onto the living room carpet once, and mum wasn't sure if she should wash them and take them back to Mrs Banks. I pointed out that if they were in the garbage in the first place, then she obviously didn't want them, did she? Mrs Banks caught monster going through her garbage for the third time this week. She arrived on our doorstep, with him tucked backward under her arm. His tail was wagging around and around, like it does when he's happy, and she had to put her head to one side to stop it from hitting her in the face. You do realise that this animal is completely out of control, don't you, Mrs Beckett? She said. Mum was a bit flustered, because she'd been in the middle of an argument with Dad when she answered the door. Monster stopped wagging and began to wriggle, but the more he wriggled, the more Mrs Banks gripped onto him. He's been going through my trash again, and he left a present on my lawn. A present, said mum, rubbing her forehead. Yes, Mrs Beckett, a present. The foul, smelly, disgusting kind. Monster's tail wagged again, as if he was showing us all where the present had come from. I snorted, and Mrs Banks shot a look at me. There was a high-pitched yelp, as she tightened her grip around my dog even more. You shouldn't be holding him like that, I shouted. He- Sample complete. Ready to continue?