 Hi she was seven happy new year toast toast toast okay so I'm gonna cover a bunch of topics in one video because I've had a lot of requests and I need to just go through them quick because some of them don't need a whole video okay so the first request I got is dating in this time you have to actually verify that a man is single because they do lie about their status a single married or taken or in a relationship so you do need to verify that ladies do your research get get him to invite you to your to his house make sure you have maybe make sure you're able to call him at certain times of the night don't let his excuses talk out of it make sure that you can verify that he is 100% single ladies because a lot of man will lie to you okay okay now that that's out of the way second thing to discuss is if you are not over your ex and you want to keep him chasing you while you're with a new guy just to make him jealous and so that he'll always be there okay once you've let it be known that you're having sex with another man that ex is not going to really be chasing you that chasing you that much because once a man knows that you just you're sleeping with another man it's pretty much over in their mind so that's that's like done if you can convince him that you're not sleeping with him and that you're just getting to know this person and he still might hang on if you keep communication open up with him that's fine but once you like move on sexually it's kind of hard to go backwards with in a man's mind because they're really possessive okay so moving on next one is another another girl asked me how do you date as a virgin in in their 20s how should you go about dating okay well I don't know if you live in America men America it's very rare to be a virgin and date in these days it's a very sexualized country women are more free and like when I was younger I actually dated an Indian guy from India and he had a girlfriend I didn't know about the time I was young y'all but he would go out and sleep with random women and and so his bro girlfriend could maintain her virginity and I don't know if she knew he would send her home like y'all he would send her home like at a certain time and he would stay after at the bar the club or wherever he was and then he would pick up other women that were you know doing so if you're a girlfriend and you're dating a guy he's probably getting it from somewhere if not you because that's what guys do they want to explore they want to have a lot of sex before they settle down and get married to one shit okay that's just me in general so if I were you I wouldn't take it personally if you find out your man's sleeping with somebody else cheating doesn't mean that they love that girl if they just want to have sex okay this is how most men are and you know I don't know if they'll continue to do it after marriage I'm not sure but I do see a lot of these guys online who are in you know certain cultures that are not very sexual always looking for sex so that's one thing to keep in mind but you know if you meet the right type of guy with the same moral values as you who's not out looking for that who's probably not super attractive at a young age who are who is able to go out and just get sex or whatever or pay for it because a lot of will hire a prostitute I mean let's let's face it so I would just not take it personal and hopefully after marriage she will take that seriously okay next question I had was can you tell me about you know when you get when you get married you know how do things change in the relationship everything changes it's a power it's a power thing okay I'm gonna tell y'all because a lot of women don't understand this after you get married the power shifts the power will shift especially if you work ladies if you work the power shifts to you men if your woman don't work the power shifts to you so whoever running the household making the money making the most money they are the one that lead the household you know a lot of times the woman will lead what goes on in the house but she's not gonna be making no giant decisions make it you know money making decisions because you know she just earned the money that comes into the house mostly okay so it's gonna be it's gonna be a power play it becomes a competition if y'all close to the same age and are in a career it becomes competition then see who can get the most bonuses see who can get the most promotions so you can make you know see who can get you know the most money at their job it becomes a competition until one of until the woman gets pregnant when the woman gets pregnant she starts if she's not into her pregnancy and more into her career she starts resenting that man you know he starts resenting her because he's she can't bring in the money like she used to because she has to take off work she has to stay home the baby for like six weeks and unless she doesn't get you know the pay to you know maternity pay she's taken off for sickness she's taking off for you know a doctor's appointments and she might just want to stay home and not go back to work after the baby for maybe a year or two and so a lot of men start to resent their woman because first of all they start changing their looks they start changing everything you know the way they wear their hair some might chop it off so the power shifts and then when the baby comes the baby gets all the attention the man gets a little attention he feels like an outcast is on how the power changes during a marriage and you will get tested a lot during the first few years of your marriage they say this the first seven years of a marriage is the hardest you can get past the first seven years it's no problem but the first seven years are the absolute hardest and you have to get through so you know everything changes after marriage women become more dominant because they feel like you know what they're not they don't have to act anymore they don't have to play this role now they didn't like let the real them out and sort of you know be who they are and not have to pretend anymore and the husband gets to meet this woman for the first time meet married woman okay but the good thing about it is they become closer they become more comfortable with each other they become more like family they depend on each other for more than monetary reasons their kids start to look at them as you know something special and they start to feel that so it's a beautiful thing as well but I'm telling you it's not like boyfriend and girlfriend so this is why I always say it's very important if you go into a marriage to know exactly what you want to have it planned out to know exactly what steps you're going to take if this person loses their job or if they don't want to go back to work after their baby or this is not y'all need to have that discussion before y'all even discuss marriage okay because this is where a lot of people get divorced at I already told my husband before we got married so you know what I'm not going back to work I'm not working no okay and he knew that before he married me so it's all good okay so let's see another oh somebody want to see my perfumes that I wear okay right now I'm wearing this is a dark seductive smell like this is alluring this is like this is black orchid by Tom Ford this yes this is what you wear at night and like a day fragrance a nice little feminine day fragrance is this Viva la Juicy by Juicy Couture that I wear it's really feminine it's not too fruity it smells womanly in it but it smells sweet and it's just a really nice subtle fragrance that you can wear to work and not be overpowering you can wear this to lunch you can wear this to Sunday brunch but when you go on a date when you're going to happy hour you need to get this sprayed on it when you walk by that man's gonna be like this is like mmm yeah I need to go smell this if y'all have it anyway those are the perfumes that I'm wearing and like when I go to bed at night or when I'm just lounging around the house but I still want to have a fragrance on but not waste my perfume I wear a wrapped in comfort a bad bad and bodywork show and it smells like incense oranges just like spices it doesn't smell like it's it's fruity spices incense it smells like a like you've been meditating or something you know it's like but also warm like you're sitting by fire but this is like seasonal so like a fall winter fragrance this smells like warmth and another thing that I like to wear is this butterfly flower my bath and body works I have the body spray to this as well but it's in my bathroom this with this kind of smells like a martin jacob daisy it's like a flowery floral sweet spring scent so this is what I wear in the spring so those are like my smells my go-to smells that I really like when I like when I'm just going to bed or when I just get out the shower and I don't want to waste my bath and body works part of I have this honey vanilla body spray that I just spray on like just go hop into bed because you know I like to have some type of fragrance when I go to sleep and plus it's cheap it was like a dollar y'all got that from the Dollar Tree but it's pretty good also yeah that's what I wear also I like to have another question I can answer real quick I think that was pretty much it Valentine's Day is coming up what should you do how do you get through a Valentine's date I start early because women always do this they wait till the last minute thinking some man's gonna come rescue them and ask them to be their Valentine make your Valentine's Day plans early I have already been mine I already told my husband look we're going out Valentine's Day this date we're going on a double date with my best friend her husband this is where we're going I've already ordered my outfit they're on the way I've already ordered them my shoes I've already picked out my outfit what are you like we're planning now because this is what you have to do when you're married to have kids and busy you gotta plan like a motherhead so ladies if you're after a busy man a business-oriented man start planning your Valentine's Day now ask him what he wants to do don't let him surprise you man don't think that foreign events you gotta take the initiative and say you know what what are we gonna do for Valentine's Day this year how about let's do this let's do that and he'll be like okay that sounds good and ask him like do you want to make the plans or the reservations you want me to call him in and book it make sure that he knows that you're involved in this because if you ask men to do this kind of stuff they might forget they might forget on you know to make the reservation and y'all know stuff is booked on Valentine's Day so you need to take the power in your own hands on this and ladies and all he has to do is basically basically just show up and if he's already put efforts and plans and stuff together and marked it on his calendar he's gonna be looking forward to it as well okay he's gonna be able to prepare for it so there'll be no excuse like he's gonna know he has to get you a gift he's gonna know he has to pay for dinner he's gonna know he has to take you somewhere after dinner he's gonna know all this so he's going to start watching his budget he's gonna start making plans he's gonna start thinking about you know what he needs to do and book book your Valentine's Day a month in advance it's wise and you're not left lonely and sad because most guys don't really value Valentine's Day women do okay so if you're not in a relationship start talking about Valentine's Day anyway if you're just dating someone say let's make a date for Valentine's Day I think it would be really cool to have a date on Valentine's Day that way you know blah blah make up something I don't know but just say you know let's go out on Valentine's Day I think it will be just cool to be out with a bunch of other couples that have been together for years just to you know look at the difference and the make up some stuff but get your Valentine's Day request in early ladies otherwise you're not gonna have you're gonna be like the last minute crying and said nobody loves me anti Valentine's Day if you don't have a man make it with a friend go out with a best friend go out get do a spa day Valentine's Day you know if you don't have a best friend take your kids somewhere for Valentine's Day but make your plans early book them early because everything's booked up and if you're busy that day you don't have time think about how single how sad you are how messed up your love life is and how your man forgot and how your man is not the best man in the world well if you want your life to go right you got to put your stuff in order ahead of time so that you can enjoy the effects of your the cause that you have created you know you guys say oh this is the best Valentine's Day ever I'm so glad I planted them up ahead everything is perfect you know so y'all start I'll see you later happy new year