 Hi everyone. You've all probably heard the saying that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. But I also think that you are shaped heavily by the people you look up to and the information that you consume. So isn't it such a privilege that we can make an active choice to pick people to look up to who inspire us, people who provide us new perspectives and people who feel help us feel good for who we truly are. So welcome everyone. My name is Monica and I'm a med student and the host of the Ask an Expert series where we chat to experts. So people who might be clinicians, those who have lived expertise about all things mental wellness. I was recently acquainted with Yuri Choi and truly I left the conversation feeling so inspired. She's definitely one person that I look up to and I feel so honored to have the opportunity to introduce you all to her. Just as a short bio in case you have not yet met her. Yuri Choi is the founder of Yuri Choi Coaching and she helps entrepreneurs and high performers achieve powerful results through helping them understand and leverage their emotional states, mindset and find deeper fulfillment and peace. She is also the author of Creating Your Own Happiness. She's a speaker, a YouTuber and an 11 times bestselling co-author of other collaborative book series. She's also the designated performance coach and advisor for Psych2Go and she's worked with the CEO and leadership team. She is also passionate about mental health advocacy and so we'll be talking about that today as well. So today the topic is really around creating your own happiness, building resilience and overcoming challenges. I'm so grateful to introduce you all to Yuri. Welcome. Hi Monica, thank you so much for having me and just setting the whole conversation forth. You're amazing. I'm just smiling, listening to you. You have such a beautiful aura, beautiful energy. Calm me down. So thank you so much. You know the first time that we met I felt the exact same way. I felt the way that you connected was just so powerful. I think just getting to learn how to be a good listener is such an important skill. And I know we'll be talking more about positive mindsets, positive ways to approach situations and just hearing your story was something I learned and I wrote down in my journal that evening. So yeah, super grateful to have you here. Thank you. Thank you. I'm so excited. And I'm excited to connect with the site two goers, my favorite community. Those are all amazing. So yeah, let's let's have a great conversation. I'm so excited. Of course. So to those who have just joined you can let us know where you're tuning in from what perhaps just start the conversation. What gives you meaning because we'll be really delving into all those kind of wellness topics around meaning around resilience today. And while people do that, I'd love to just kind of dive in to ask whether you'd like to share more about your story to the site to go community. Yeah. First of all, sorry, I was getting a little distracted by all the people joining from all over the world. Wow. You guys are joining from like Australia, Alabama, Michigan. So cool. And the question was what I enjoy about the site to a community. Yeah, what? Yeah, just tell us a little bit more about your story, your involvement with the mental health community, your advocacy work. Yeah, yeah. So where should I start? You know, first of all, I think it's worth mentioning because I think we do have a global community here. I moved to the States when I was 11 years old from South Korea. So I, you know, kind of started that immigrant life with my family, first generation Korean. And, you know, moving to the States, there were a lot of challenges that I think immigrated immigrated families go through. And yeah, a lot of it affected my family in different ways. So I know we talked about this a little bit before our chat, but really one of my things is that one of my really close family members on, you know, fell into depression and almost took her life. And I was very young. I was about 17 years old. And ever since then, thankfully, she's still alive today. But ever since then, I really started questioning, like, why do people do what they do? What makes people so happy? What makes people so unhappy? What leads them to live a life where, you know, they get to continue to want to live and all that kind of stuff at a very young age. So I got really interested in psychology, like all of us here. And yeah, one of my degrees was in psychology, I loved psychology so much, I wanted to just understand humans and why people do what they do. And I actually just went on my journey of being in the corporate world for 10 years and there's nothing wrong with being in the corporate world, by the way. But I think for me, for whatever reason, it didn't feel aligned because I just never knew that I had other choices. And I'll come back to that in just a little bit. But in 10 years that I was there, I started to feel unfulfilled and just kind of burnt out. I definitely overachieved not really dealing with some of the things I've gone through in my life in the beginning of my those years. Long story short, in 2015 is when I really was hit with this fact that life is short, people's lives expire. And one of the ways I found out was my dad was diagnosed with cancer and two and a half years later of just horrible cancer battling. He ended up, yeah, he ended up passing away. And not only did that really shock like me in the sense that, wow, like, this is life does end. And we know that logically, but I think that was the first time that I really connected to that fact in my heart and my body. And after he passed away, I just really decided to go after my dream. And one of my passions has always been learning about humans, helping humans, helping people find what makes them happy, helping people find what they're really excited about. And I really decided to dedicate my life to it because guess what, like, everyone's life ends, and we have only one chance to really live out our lives, live out our dreams. So I quit my job at the time. And I started this journey of building my coaching business, really desiring to help people and really making a stand for what I'm passionate about, which is mental health advocacy. Eliminating stigma around that, as well as really helping people see that we can live in infinite realm of possibilities. So, yeah. And I'm getting delightfully distracted by these chats. And one of the things that we'll talk about I'm sure is I definitely have ADHD. So if I get a little distracted, you know why? You know, I've learned to embrace it, but I'm really like, oh, like, it's so nice to be able to connect with all of you guys from all over the world. And I'm trying to stay focused. So here I am. Well, first thing I have to say is thank you so much for opening up to us, you know, being vulnerable, sharing the really the journey that you've gone through. It's a lot. I'm really sorry to hear about your dad, to hear about your family member. You know, I feel for you. And I also feel that you're so, so resilient, just getting to, you know, take that experience and here you are coaching, here you are writing a book, here you are sharing your experiences, hoping to inspire others. I think that's something that is just truly amazing. So thank you so much for sharing all of that. Yeah. And actually I want to share a cool story. So today of all days right before this, one of my friends from seventh grade posted on like Facebook, like, oh, I just got Yuri's book, so excited to read it or whatever. This is my book, by the way. And it was actually extra special because he was my first friend when I moved to the States when I didn't speak any English. And I will never forget how like he'll just never know how much that meant because, you know, here I was this ESL student, somebody who didn't speak English and he took me on as a friend without, you know, even though we couldn't really communicate and a lot of people, you know, back then kids can be mean. They totally made fun of me and you know, there is like some indirect and direct bullying back then because I didn't speak English. But there's people who just took me on as exactly as I am. And, you know, many, many years later now I'm able to like give him my book and say like, look at this book I wrote in English, you know, we started up when we couldn't even talk to each other. So it's, it was really special. So yeah, I think I've found a way to really turn these difficulties in my life and reframe it and continue to make it into my own fairy tale, my own story. I'm like, for me, these moments I really cherish because it, it makes everything I went through when I was in seventh grade worth it, like these moments. And I also know that when I'm going through a difficult time now, I know that there's a, you know, future self that hasn't happened yet. That's already thanking me for going through this because it's going to give meaning in that moment even more. So, yeah. Would you like to walk us a bit through walk us through how the process was, you know, really being developing resilience, because I think that this is a bit philosophical but I don't think anything is like anything is just innate like we're not born with resilience we're not born with perseverance. So how was that something that you really, you know, took to the next level through your book through your speaking engagements and so on. I agree that's philosophical. And I want to offer a slightly different perspective, maybe we are born resilient. We learn fears along the way, which is good because, you know, that protects us in a certain way. And I want to actually start off by talking about what fear means, so that I can talk about how I was able to channel different emotions like anger to really help me push forward. You know, so fear is a really, I love talking about this, you know, fear is like an actually very common as well as healthy emotion and sensation in our body. Because back in the day when you know they were tigers chasing us we need a fear so that we can like hyper focus all of our attention, all of our resources and go after what it is that like we need to do which is survive. And over the years over the thousands of years, we've now created this, you know, system where we can activate that system without having to, you know, we without being chased by a tiger, basically. So then we have all these fears about what it means when we fail. We have all these, you know, stories about what it means when we are faced with challenges and we feel like, you know, we don't know what to do because we're scared that we're going to make the wrong choice and it really comes back down to that fear response of fight flight or fun or freeze right. So with that said, knowing that I think when we know that these fear anger fear based emotions are actually coming from a place where it's actually a socially conditioned response. We can also reframe the social context of what that means and make it into something that we can leverage. And as far as for me when I was younger. And so the reason I give that background is because I want to explain how I channel motivation now versus how I used to back then both are really powerful but just a little bit different energy so when I was you know 1211 years old. I was, I was not happy I was angry that, you know, I came from the, I came from Korea where I used to be like, you know, very social had a lot of friends, and then I'm dropped off in this country where I don't speak any of the language and culturally inept and I would just don't fit in. So then. And then all of a sudden people thought I was in quotes like stupid and all these things just because I didn't speak the language. So it angered me, I was, you know, so what I wanted was to prove them wrong. I took massive inspired action because of that anger. And this is something that I talk about with my clients often this energy of anger is actually really powerful when people are angry. People do amazing things. I mean sometimes scary things depends on how you channel that energy right, but people can do really drastic bold things. And for me what I did was I'm like, I don't want to be this person who doesn't speak English who is bullied anymore. I'm going to learn English and I'm going to speak it better than that much. So it came from that like spiteful place channel that anger I read 30 books and 30 days and language I didn't know which was English at the time. And within just a few months I was out of the English a second language class. I remember going back after the summer to the teacher being like hey like I'm ready to move out of the English class and the teacher is like oh nobody does that. I'm like I'm ready like give me a test or something like I'm ready. So I took the test, and I tested out and it was it was a moment I realized like when I take inspired massive action like anything is possible. I didn't speak English in just two months like what else is possible so at a young age I learned that now I explained that though. Because when we take massive action, although the outcome is always good right like in a good way if we do it in a good way. However, it can have consequences when it's coming from that trauma traumatize or scared or spiteful place. So, you know, back then, all I was doing was proving them wrong like who the heck is they anyway. Right, so for me it was always coming from this place of comparison and competition back then. And I realized I wasn't healthy because all I can do is come back to neutral but I wasn't feeling more confident I wasn't feeling more worthy. Just because I was constantly, you know, trying to just prove them wrong. So I explained that because now when I talk about resilience because I'm moving towards a goal and a vision which is completely different energy. You know, I get excited and I keep moving forward with this mission to create infinite possibilities for people for and for myself and to be the example of that and to help people understand their emotions and to create their own happiness because what I get excited about is this like world I can see where more people are connected where more people are actually happy. So they're helping each other and just more harmony in the world more love in the world and that vision like pulls me forward now. And I think that way it also helps me overcome challenges and be resilient but there's like two different ways to achieve that. So I hope that answers your question. Yeah, definitely I see the it's like the way that you appraise the situation drastically changed. It's as if kind of the saying like you see the glass half full and so then you come from a place that you do something for yourself rather than for, you know, proving other people wrong or, you know, doing it because you feel some sort of negative emotion that you want to eradicate. So it's not like you're doing something to get rid of something bad but to bring in something good. Yes, yes to yeah to I think there's two ways that people take action. One is because we're trying to move away from pain and the other is we're trying to move towards something that is more pleasurable or to create something that we are more connected to. So I'm just looking at some of these comments here. And I'm curious you guys like, where are you guys coming from? And what questions do you have for me? As you do that I'm just going to quickly lighten the room a bit as you probably can tell I'm based in Montreal so it's getting pretty late even with the daylight saving time so it's getting pretty dark. Yeah, the situation. Yeah, hopefully a lot better, but let me know. From Mexico, from Egypt, from the US, from Canada. So cool. And speaking about the process of, you know, being resilient, I think for most people it often involves things that people find give some joy. So I'm quite curious, you know, in a time when things are difficult in the time when things are sometimes sort of hopeless. What did you find gave you joy what were sources of inspiration for you what did you look towards for that source of hope. Yeah, I think when I talk about finding hope. Two situations come to mind I'll start with one of them, which was. So, I talked about this briefly, one of my parents almost took her life and she, there was a period of my life where she was in the hospital, and I was 17. And so it was scary. And I realized I had two choices. And I think this is when I start to realize like what I can do to start to create the life I want and manifest things. So I remember she was in the ER she was in the, or I see her whatever for, gosh, it's like a big blur for me during that time, but I think a week or two or so. And that's when I just gotten my license I was driving I was 17 and was going to high school and all that. And I remember. I mean obviously was scared and heartbroken, like my family just felt shattered. And I remember I sat down with myself for the first time because I felt like I was like really alone in that anyway. I didn't have anyone I can talk to about like what just happened. But I had to make a choice. And that choice was, I can just be completely broken from this. Which I think at the time, I mean my best friends and my teachers that I did talk to, they're like you're you're allowed to be like completely, you know they didn't use these words but shatter from this this is a hard thing. But I remember thinking I'm like, no, no, no, no, like I want my mom who have something that she can come back to when she's like out of her coma. And be grateful that she did like that's who I want to be. And when I think about that type of person. That person who has applied to all the colleges, who's gone into a bunch of schools, who's going to do well, who's going to be successful like that is the reality that my mom would want to come back to and I don't know how else to communicate with her right now, but she couldn't. But that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to create the reality that she'd be happy to come back to. And, you know, I didn't call that manifesting back then I didn't call that mindset back then I didn't call that resiliency back then it just made sense. Like, why would someone who just didn't want to live want to live. Probably a life that they can feel hopeful about. So that gave me a source of inspiration that gave me motivation so I remember during that time. You know, being an immigrant I already had to do most of this by myself anyway which is like writing all the college essays and all that, but like, I really had to be resourceful. I talked to all my teachers about applying to colleges I mean they told me they're like you don't even have to come to school like take some time off if you need to. I was like, no, no, no, like I'm going to create the future that my mom would be so happy that she came back to. So they helped me write my essays and I actually wrote about the experience, which even now when I think about it's pretty bold as a 17 year old I'm like I can't believe I wrote about that situation my mom almost dying and really being vulnerable that way, which I think got me into a lot of these schools and which got me scholarship so by the time that she did become healthy again. Yeah she was glad that she came back I was on track to be continually successful. So I think in each of these moments when we do overcome or when we are faced with challenges we have choices. And I think it really just comes down to being able to kind of see past that challenge because a lot of times and this is what happens when we're stuck in the survival mindset. When we are stuck with that fear, which is, we can't see past that. We can't see past that here we can't see past that particular incidents or event. So we think it's hopeless. But there's like a life after that challenge. So then when we can start to channel like what would that look like in the future after post that challenge and like really play out the whole story. It just makes sense to continue to tune into a life that we truly want. So I think, you know, it starts with getting clear of what is it what would excite you, not just like dwelling on what is hurting me right now. But like, what do I really want? Like, this is cool because I mean it's not cool per se, but in the bigger picture it's like showing you what you really don't want. And then that could be an opportunity for you to create what you really do want. You know, you can just look at the opposite of that. So, yeah. I really hear the impactful role that your mom played to really guide you through those those moments when you had to apply to college for the first time. I know as a first generation student as well, it is so difficult because you don't know what to like, where do you even begin? You know, like there's the SATs, the SATs, this goes on. Oh my goodness. And if you're playing internationally, it's a whole different ballgame. It's really difficult. But just hearing how you managed to go past it to really hold your mom's, you know, you hold your mom close to your heart throughout all of it was just, yeah, very inspiring. And another theme that I noticed as well is really how I would say future oriented you are, because oftentimes, like you mentioned, the lack of hope comes from not being able to see that there's anything better than what you currently have. So it can and it is quite difficult to imagine the future when, I don't know, one day, everything will be normal, everything will be the way that you want it to. So, I don't know, do you have any kind of specific advice to people out there who are still struggling, who are trying to overcome a difficult moment, who potentially don't see a better future? Yeah, yeah. And here's the thing it's really hard to imagine the future though, when we are in that survival mindset. Because when we're running away from tigers, we're not thinking about, what should I eat? What kind of life do I want to create? What kind of business do I want to create? What kind of book do I want to write? We're thinking about surviving. So this is why I have such fun helping my clients see the benefits of things like meditation, things like exercising, which actually brings you back to a relaxed state, literally physically in your body, so that you can move away from the survival physical state. Like, so when we are stressed out or when we are burnt out or when we are stressed or scared or whatever, we're actually increasing the levels of cortisol in our body, which is the same response that happens when we are running away from tigers. So in our body, we think that we are in danger, like literal danger, even if we're not, like even if our physical body is not in danger, we think that we are. So what do we do? This is why people can't sleep. This is why people can't digest things when they're stressed because your body thinks that you're running away from something really dangerous. And when you're running away, the only thing you're thinking about is surviving. With that mindset, it feels really hopeless because the only thing that you can think about is surviving, so therefore you can't predict the future or you can't create the future. So one of the things that you can do to start is to calm down your nervous system, whatever that takes. For me, it's, excuse me, for me, it's meditation, for me, it's journaling, for me, it's connecting, for me, it's giving, for me, it's, you know, all of those things. So it allows me to start to connect to that. Yes, that's amazing. I second the notion you said about mindfulness. It is very, very powerful. There have been tons of studies done on how it can improve general well-being, but simply, it's just great all around. I practice every morning as well, every morning, every evening. Even brief mindfulness interventions were found to be quite effective for producing general stress levels. So that's something that worked personally for me as well. Yeah. And I'm curious from the chat, you guys, like, what, yeah, what kind of challenges are you moving through right now or have you moved through in the past? I would love to bring some attention to this chat and talk about how I can support you because that's why I'm here. Exactly. Yeah, let's give a few moments to do that, because I know you give such amazing advice. So if people have anything specific that they want to bring up, then you can allocate some space for that. It's interesting. Somebody said it's shrooms. And I won't actually talk about that because I'm not an advocate of any of these things because I think it can be done, like, naturally, but I will say this. The reason things like shrooms has gone so much popularity over the years is because it does exactly what meditation does. It does exactly what breathwork does, which is, you know, it really interrupts the current neural circuits so that you're able to create different ways to think about things. There's no judgment about how you get there. However, I prefer the more natural ways, which, you know, is free and available at all times, which is, you know, different kinds of meditations, breathwork. Like this all does a very do similar things. Get anxiety from feeling lonely when I think I'm ghosted or rejected. Okay. When I'm feeling lonely, I think I'm ghosted or rejected. I think when we feel ghosted or rejected, one thing that we're thinking about is that we think that it's about us. There's like this underlying core belief about what we are worth. So when people disappear and do their own things, we think this because we're not enough. It has nothing to do with you for me, right? It has everything to do with what's going on in their own lives, what they're available for emotionally or not emotionally. We don't see it from their perspective. We take it on from the perspective that already exists. So if your, if your belief about who you are is that you're not worthy of that connection or other connections, then it might, the automatic thinking that I go to like, oh, I've been rejected because that person left me. But in reality, they're probably moving through their own things that you're not aware of that is being projected in the dynamic that was created there. So one thing that you can think about is that most people are just doing what's best for them. It has nothing to do with us. You know, in that moment, sometimes it's really hard to like internalize and it's a constant practice, you know, just to like really let that go and just say, okay, what could this mean for them? And what can I focus on? Again, it really comes back down to focusing on what you want. If that person, you know, quote unquote rejected you and by the way, I heard this quote once where rejection is God's protection from, you know, what you really want. So go back to what you really want. Do you want somebody who rejects you and ghost you? If not, like, that's not your person, you know, focus on what you want. Probably somebody who loves you and accepts you. Yeah. I just like to add, I think that no message is the most powerful message that you can get. So by them not responding, it's telling you volumes, right? It's telling you that perhaps they have other priorities. It's telling you that maybe they perhaps even hadn't had time to respond yet because they're busy. Perhaps it's telling you that they, unfortunately, probably aren't great at communicating so you can take that for what it is and ultimately know that it's in your hands to want to respond or not. Yeah, I love that. Honestly, I'm currently under a lot of pressure. And instead of spending time with my family, I'm running around, collecting last few documents for moving abroad and my flight is on Monday. One thing that really helped me in my journey. And this broke my head when I learned this because I'm like, what do you mean pressure is not real. Like, think about what pressure actually means. You know, we run around saying like, Oh, that person is pressuring me or a pressure from this. Like, what is pressure? Really? It's what we decided is either important or not important. We're the one giving energy to that. At the end of the day, you're a person with free will. You can choose to do whatever you want. You can say your job is giving you all the pressure in the world, but you chose into that job. So at the end of the day, it's you, you creating that imagined idea of pressure. It's because you care about it. So when you say you're under a lot of pressure, it's such a strong imagery. What if you get to say, I am above all the challenges and overcoming them. A lot of times how we speak to ourselves and others really creates a reality. Actually, a hundred percent in time. Marty, you saved my life. I think you're the one here who's really giving all those amazing insights. It's really you who's doing the whole community a great service. I just want to share a comment that a person sent in the chat. That's quite related to what a person, the whole scenario that we were just discussing. It's not to, you know, invalidate whatever someone's going through. It's very real, but at the same time, I want to flag that most of the time, for me at least, I noticed that I catastrophize a lot. So I suffer more in imagination than what is truly happening. So sometimes just taking a step back and using accurate language. So telling myself objectively, these are the deadlines that I have to set. These are the deadlines that have to meet whatever. And then really thinking about prioritizing and really understanding what actually needs to be done, what actually doesn't need to be done, and all those extra emotions that I'm piling on top of it. Like, oh my gosh, I'm not going to be able to do this, all that kind of extra fluff is not helping. So that's my thoughts on that. And thank you to Duke of Cooker's Lane for that. Very, very relevant. I love that we suffer more in imagination than reality. That's so true. And I want to offer a practical way to really reframe that. So think about what is the thing that's stressing you out? Like, whatever you guys are stressing out right now, think about that. And then just like Monica said, think about all the stories you're creating around what's actually going on. So there's like the objective facts of what's going on. Okay, Monica has a deadline on this date. Monica has a deadline on this date. Monica has a deadline on this date. She needs to spend these many hours on those deadlines. Those might be the facts. But what are the stories that you might be creating, Monica? Is that, okay, then I'm not going to get any sleep. I'm going to be so tired. I'm going to be so stressed out. Like you're creating all these stories before it ever happens. Right. And I'm not saying you, I'm just using you as an example. No, it's very relatable for anyone as well. So totally fine. I do this too. You know, I'll be like, oh, I have to do this. I have to do that. And I create all these stories about what that means about me and what you can try on is what is another story you can create? Like, what are the facts? What's another story that you can create around these facts? What if the story gets to be, oh my gosh, I have all these deadlines and Monica, I know you're becoming a doctor, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, exactly. Med student. By the way, I so look up to her. I was very touched that you say you look up to me, but you're going to be a doctor saving literal lives. So anyway, with that said, wow, like I'm a step closer to becoming a doctor. Like that's what your deadline could mean if you like zoom out. Or, you know, wow, I wonder who I'm going to become after I moved through this deadline, even though it's challenging. That's something I thought about too when I was moving through this challenge when I was young, you know, really moving through that time of like almost losing my mom and being like, I wonder who, how strong I'm going to be after I go through this, like nothing's going to scare me anymore. Like if I can go get through this, oh my gosh, I'm going to be unstoppable. And that gave me a little bit of hope that I needed at the time. Even when my dad was sick, obviously, you know, I think for me connections are really important. So it affects me a lot. And when my dad was really sick, he was, you know, diagnosed with cancer. And for any of you guys who've gone through that journey with your, with anyone that, you know, it's, it's really, really hard. And to watch somebody, you know, just really be super sick in front of you. Anyway, with that said, and I had, I felt a lot of anxiety. I was, you know, moving through all sorts of emotions. But during that time, I remember being like, okay, like if I can get through this, I'm going to be so strong. I'm learning so much about myself. I'm learning so much about life and death and everything in between. I even thought about the fact that my mom at the time hadn't lost a parent yet. I'm like, you know, when I lose my dad, I'm going to be able to understand so many more people who either will or have lost their parent. Because for the most part, statistically, that's something that everyone will go through. And in a way, I'm lucky because I'm going to have so much empathy and understanding for these people for the rest of my life at such an early age, that I can be thankful for. And really seeing, like trying so hard to find a gift in that. And obviously, you know, I don't wish that upon anybody, but it did give me that reframe to be like, okay, like even though this is hard, like this is going to allow me to connect to people in such a special way, because everyone will go through this and I get to be there for them. And so, again, I think it's about future pacing. It's about creating a different meaning about what that means. It doesn't mean that what you're going through and the story that you initially created isn't valid, but it's equally valid as any other stories you can create about this. They can both exist. They can all exist. So I hope that supports you. That is very touching, truly just seeing how you, your mindset throughout it all, trying to find a gift in situations where I think pretty much anyone would agree that it's so hard that all you want to do is sleep in bed and not leave. And to find that energy, to find that source of, not really motivation, but that source of, you know, just how your mom inspired you to overcome your challenges through applying to college, all of that. It's impactful. Just finding that one thing, I think, or one or two things that help push you through is I think a good piece of advice that I'm taking from this. Also, if you feel like sleeping, sleep. I think in society, we have put so much pressure about just pushing through. And I don't think that's what resilience really means. Yes, I think it's finding the strength to move through certain things, of course, but sometimes that looks like sleeping. You need to sleep if you need to rest. I wish I knew that actually earlier on. While I am very grateful that I got through some of these experiences with strength, I also wish I knew to rest more, to be honest. If you need to sleep, take a freaking nap and calm down your nervous system. That's okay, you know. Yeah, definitely. Resilience looks different for everyone. I think the overall takeaway is that it's really knowing yourself, knowing what your body needs and doing, having the grit, having the courage to do exactly that. Because sometimes, you know, our body is very good. Our body will send us signals over to colds. You know, just as an example, our hypothalamus has this whole set point. You know, it's going to do things. It's going to change the way that we metabolize food, the way that we break down glucose, all of that to make sure that we are feeling comfortable. That's just one example. When we're hungry, our brain is going to release some hormones to encourage us to eat, things like that. Like our body knows what it wants for the most part. And so the problem really comes when our minds get in the way. When we know that we're so tired, but we want to continue to push through because for whatever reason, we're just telling ourselves to do that, even though we know it's not in our body's best interest. So I think really being resilient is listening to yourself, listening to your body and knowing that truly. Your gut knows what is the right thing to do and following that. I don't know, I didn't put it that gracefully, but hopefully that message gets across. That's beautiful. I love that so much. And I think also to get a little bit woo-woo, if you'd like, if you have a God of your own, if you just would like to connect to your best self, you want to connect to the sky, the universe, whatever you want to call it, that's something that you can also connect to. During the time of these difficult times, I prayed a lot. I connected to something bigger than myself, and that gave me strength too. And you don't have to call that anything. It's not about our religion, but it is about acknowledging that there might be other ways to feel divinely protected and guided. And I do believe in that, because if I think we talked about this the other day, the universe, God, whatever you want to call it, he's conspiring for us. At the end of the day, I truly believe that in my heart, that we are gifted these difficult experiences because our journey is not supposed to be quote-unquote easy and convenient, but it's supposed to help us discover who we are, what we're made of, what our spirits are made of, what our souls are about. And eventually our souls will evolve through that. So if that's the case, we can continue to connect to something that's bigger than us. And there's also scientific research and evidence that whether you believe in this stuff or not, that praying is actually most beneficial for the prayer, not the prayee, because it's just another form of mindfulness. Calmness and your nervous system creates hope, connects you to something bigger. And I found that to be really helpful. It would be impossible for me to talk about resilience without talking about my spiritual connection to the universe, to God, whatever you want to call it. I think there is a way that you can really source. I mean, when I do think about, and for me, maybe that being, that being that's bigger than us doesn't even have to be a being outside of us. It just could mean like your future self, because she or he or whatever knows, like they know, they know that, I mean, if they exist, they're fine, somewhere in the future, so they must know how to get through this, connect to that. If it's weird for you to connect to, you know, some sort of God or universe or whatever, just connect to your future self and ask them questions. How did you get there? How did you overcome this? Journal about it. Let it flow through you. We can source infinite energy that way. I think every one of those moments that it was really difficult for me, I think I met and it was guided by my future self. Like when I was 17, I swear, I was talking to my, you know, wiser self back then. I think one of the ways that I channeled that was through writing. I looked at some of my writings and my poetry from when I was very young, and I'm like, how did I know to write that? And some of the poetry poems that I've written didn't even make sense until I was way older. Like, but I wrote it. It was almost like I was like meeting my future self in those moments. So I think it's possible. I think it's so amazing to see how resilience for you really encompasses elements of spirituality, elements of what people will call like principles and cognitive behavioral therapy, principles of mindfulness, your things that make you excited, things that make you happy, that of writing, using your voice to inspire others. It all comes together. And I just think it's truly so inspirational to hear you speak about so many different domains so eloquently seeing those connections, how they relate together. So it's truly amazing. Thank you, Monica. You're amazing. I appreciate you. You're such a great listener and you asked such great questions. I really appreciate you. Feeling is mutual. And I could definitely see that in the community chat as well. So thank you, everyone. I just see if there's anything else. But I have, I guess, a final question for you. And I think it kind of encompasses themes that we've chatted about, right? So themes around happiness, themes around building resilience, overcoming challenges. So if you were to give one advice to your younger self, to perhaps the community, what would it be? My younger self. For my younger self. My younger self was just kind of like give you two second background of my younger self. So in my late teens and my early 20s, I didn't really have a lot of tools to manage my stress and the trauma that I've gone through and all that. I resorted a lot to very unhealthy habits. Like overachieving. Like drinking a lot. I mean, that was a part of my journey, to be honest. And I wish I, and I did eventually find healthier ways to manage my stress and anxiety, which was for me, yoga, meditation, helping others. That's always, that all been very helpful. But I wish I asked for help earlier. I wish I found a therapist or some kind of mentor or somebody who can really actively help me sooner to help find healthier coping mechanisms. Because, you know, I've talked to people who self-harm and all that. I think I was self-harming myself, maybe not directly, but absolutely indirectly. I did not have the healthiest coping mechanisms. And I really feel for the people who resort to that. And I want to remind you and let you know if you're one of them and myself from my younger years, if I get to give myself advice, there's healthier coping mechanisms. And I can say this now because even though I've gone through a lot of things with resilience back then, it was still coming from a survival mindset. So while I could see kind of like the short-term possibility of what's possible, I don't think I really saw long-term, meaning like when I'm like 50, 60, 70-year-old. And when I think about those years now, I'm like, wow, I really wish I took care of myself better back then to manage my stress and anxiety and have compassion for the years I did it. However, I also wish I did. So I think seeking help earlier, you're asking for help and not having this responsibility to feel like I have to do everything on my own. I was hyper-independent. So that's one thing. But also that she's loved and that she will be okay because I don't know if I knew that sometimes. I think I like, you know, obviously knew that. That's why I'm here. But there's times that were really scary. So just, yeah. And I think I'm telling you, sometimes I feel like these moments, when I say these things out loud, whether in interviews or just journaling or whatever, I really feel like my younger self heard me, my future self. Because I don't know how I got through that sometimes. But yeah. Thank you so much for sharing, truly. Being so open and so vulnerable, it's not easy. And thank you. Yeah, thank you. Yeah. I'm just reading some of the comments here. Yeah. I'm also reading it. And just so grateful for the community for joining our conversation today. I know we touched upon so many different topics from wellness, resilience, happiness, challenges, spirituality, you name it. And getting to get a bit of an insight into your amazing, your powerful mindset is, yeah, it's truly an honor. And I really hope that everyone here also enjoyed the chat. So I just want to also flag for people who are watching, the link for Yuri's book is in the description box. It is truly so amazing. You know, I'm just so inspired to hear that. You have come so far from not being able to understand English and now writing a book to influencing others. You know, that is something that few people can do. So thank you so much for your time today. We'll share your journey. And we'll definitely be chatting against you. Yes, yes. Thank you so much, Monica. I'm so grateful that you invited me for this chat. Again, you create such a safe, grounded place for this. And I think I can feel it. All the people who's joined us can feel it. So I really appreciate that. Thank you. Bye. Thank you. Bye, guys.