 Kissing is something that carries a surprising amount of importance in our lives. We recall our first kisses. We kiss our children. We flirt with kisses. We sympathize with kisses. We're intimate with kisses. But what is happening psychologically when we kiss each other? Here are four psychological facts about kissing. Number one, you are subconsciously analyzing a potential partner. Humans are not the only creatures that kiss. Primates do it as well. Humans have multiple uses for a kiss, whereas primates have few. However, like primates, kissing also serves as an instinctual and subconscious function. Kissing bridges the gap between our visual analysis of our potential mate and our sexual analysis of our mate. In the immortal words of Cher, if you want to know if he loves you, it's in his kiss. Cher might not have known it when the song was written, but science actually backs up her claim. Essentially, according to Waldarski and Dunbar, kissing helps us decide subconsciously whether or not our partner will make a good mate. It's not uncommon for people to complain or rejoice over the quality of their partner's kissing abilities. What they do not realize is that their brain is communicating to them that they and their partner are a good sexual match. Number two, you're bonding with your partner. Kissing is somewhat essential to romantic relationships. Some people may require less physical attention or maybe even avoid it as a result of past trauma. But for the majority outside of these exceptional circumstances, kissing releases neuropeptides, including oxytocin and vasopressin, dopamine and opioids, which have all been variously associated with human pair bonding. This means that kissing brings you and your partner closer. This truly shows the importance of kissing on a physical level as it affects both partners. Going a long time without kissing can have an effect on the bond between partners. Long-distance relationships in couples with a partner who travels will struggle with this often. Luckily, there are ways aside from kissing to maintain a bond between partners. If you find yourself in a relationship in which you're close to your partner often, make sure to kiss them as frequently as you can. This can go a long way in ensuring the romantic aspect of your relationship stays alive. Number three, motives for kissing affect relationship satisfaction, whereas kissing for goal attainment or insecurity was more present in relationships with lesser relationship satisfaction. Sexual and or relational kissing is when your motivation for kissing is influenced by passion. This can be a kiss that is sexually charged, a kiss out of love, a gentle kiss out of boredom or comfort with your partner, or a kiss that comes from sympathy. This all communicates passion to your partner. It communicates genuine love and attachment to your partner, and it should never be one-sided. One's partner should feel just as passionately to ensure a greater chance at relationship satisfaction. The other motivation is far less likely to communicate healthy love and attachment. Attainment and or insecurity kissing is when your motivation for kissing someone is influenced by a degree of desperation. Kissing for attainment would be using a kiss to soften someone enough to get your way. If you only kiss your partner when you want something or think it'll help get you out of trouble when you've done something wrong to your partner, they'll pick up on this, and it will hurt the relationship. That being said, there could be a range of factors in the relationship that would affect why one or more of the partners would learn this behavior. Attainment or insecurity kissing can also refer to kissing someone as revenge, kissing someone to boost self-esteem or reputation, or kissing someone to make someone else jealous. And number four, kissing is like a drug. Have you ever felt like you're addicted to kissing someone? It turns out that there are numerous psychological reasons for this. We discussed the release of chemicals that promote pair bonding, but one hormone that we did not touch on was cortisol. A study by Wendy L. Hill and Kerry A. Wilson found that cortisol levels decreased, which essentially meant that kissing can de-stress you. But how did we get to the point that kisses are addictive to the human race and no other species? Author and zoologist Desmond Morris proposed that humans evolved to enjoy kissing and to release good hormones each time as a result of the way early humans would have fed. That's with mothers chewing up their food and feeding it to their young, lips to lips. This would partly explain why we feel good, especially less stressed. In Desmond Morris' proposed historical context, kissing comes as a relief from hunger and therefore safety. Today, that primal hormonal response persists as kissing gives us a sense of relief, comfort, and safety. It's no wonder that we might compare it when we're in love to being addicted. It provides us with such a strong relief as if kisses from our partner are drugs. We can even look to music to see how prominent this idea is, as we can find the metaphor of love or kisses being like a drug again and again. Your love is my drug by Kesha, can't feel my face by the weekend, and I want a new drug by Huey Lewis in the news to name a few examples. Kissing is fascinating in the numerous ways it affects us psychologically. We can use it to heal and to hurt. We don't always consider how powerful a kiss can be. It's interesting to consider how, as a species, we've adapted to kissing as a psychological and social tool. Did you and your partner know you were a sexual match from the first kiss? Let us know below.