 How do you talk to yourself after you screw up? The thing that holds us back most is a sense of guilt or berating ourselves or feeling shame for things that have gone wrong in our past. A good way to think about this is think of a teacher you've had, all the teachers you've had in your life. I can think of a few teachers I've had and one of them was very very critical, very almost made me feel, and other students made us feel ashamed if we couldn't spell a word properly or do something they thought was easy, right? And other teachers I've had were really really supportive and really would give you compassion and the comparison of those two teachers, which one did I learn the most from? It's no contest. I absolutely shut down with the first teacher. As soon as I felt I was being shamed or made to feel that I should feel guilty because I wasn't able to do something, at that point I just stopped listening. I was in defense mode from that point on. That's important because we're kind of our own teachers when we make mistakes, okay? So if we make mistakes, there's a few ways in which we typically deal with it, right? So think of all the screw-ups that we make. First thing we do is, because it's so painful, we ignore it. We try to pretend like it didn't happen. And how do we manage that? How do you actually bury something like that? Well, we distract ourselves. And if you distract yourself from the pain or the disappointment for long enough, we think it goes away. Now it doesn't go away because it hasn't been processed properly. The disappointment is still there. So it goes down and eventually what happens then, it always, if it's not properly processed and it gets repressed like that, it is capital P projected. We project it out and we just feel like it's other people's fault or it's basically the bad thing about that is that it never gets, it never actually helps us. We get stuck in a cycle. So what I'm talking about today is how can we move past guilt and how can we stop guilt from getting in our way in life? The important thing to do is to realize we're human beings and mistakes are going to be inevitable. We're supposed to be making mistakes. We're supposed to be making big mistakes and small mistakes. And it's not a sign that something's gone wrong if we made a mistake. But it's to bring awareness to the most important thing. It's not whether you make mistakes or you don't make mistakes. It's to catch yourself and to become aware of your reaction to your own mistakes. That is the key thing. How do I talk to myself? Do I allow myself to feel the disappointment and then say, okay, you know what? I'm a human being and then move forward. If we do that, if we actually are not so critical of ourselves after making a mistake, we are then more open to learning. Okay, we don't shut down because if you think you're going inward to analyze what's happened in the past and you're going to be met by a very guilty conscience, you're going to avoid doing that. You're going to avoid analyzing what happened. Where could I improve the next time? So the most important thing in all this is mistakes are mistakes. They're human and it's never a reason for you to berate yourself, criticize yourself. A mistake is a mistake. Okay, a mistake is a mistake and you're going to make plenty of them. So get used to it. That's the point of all of this. Okay, get used to making those mistakes. So that inner voice, that inner critic, you do not have to listen to it. You can just choose right now. Okay? I've acknowledged a mistake. That's enough. That's enough. I've acknowledged that I made a mistake there and I don't have to dwell on it after that. If you need to apologize, you can apologize, but you don't need to dwell on it. You do not need to punish yourself because of your past mistakes. You can just, once you've acknowledged it, you can ignore that voice, that critical voice. That's the thing you could definitely ignore. Okay guys, thanks for watching and if you found this helpful or you would be interested in working with me, you can get my information from my website and you can also take my online course there on Procrastination if that's an issue in your life. With my clients, I generally work with anxiety, depression or life purpose. So those are some of the issues I work with. Reach out if you're interested and thanks for watching the video. Like and subscribe if you like this content. It helps me reach more people and take care of yourself. Talk to you again soon.