 all right so i'm checking out your shot here right so you got all this guy going on throwing and going over there so my first impression was a it's a really wide framing in terms of just your your resolution let's put it this way right this feels fairly widescreen almost anamorphic i think you could probably i know he has to walk a lot but you know i think if you would frame it like this because i don't know what the rest of your shots are so imagine if you have a tv like this and then you show this shot it might look like this on people's screens right and then you got everything with the with the black boxes there and then selling your next shot is wider here and then selling your next shot that's wide and we kind of need to keep it very consistent not that it's you know a crazy deal that you won't get hired because of that but it just feels fairly fairly wide and if the problem with that type of resolution here is that um aspect ratio is put it this way um is that your guy comes in and then stops here and you even have a moment where um spear gets out of frame here and you kind of stays put and it feels extremely extremely left heavy right so if i look at this you know you could you could take this here and then you would argue that all of this here that's all you're using from your screen and then if you look at the rest it's totally empty i know you're trying to tell a story that he's looking this way and that something's going on but this is just a crazy composition i mean that it would be at least here and again if the screen was only maybe this wide uh he could be around here like that's me would be a healthier composition so that's the first thing that i that i know is when you start that you extremely left heavy and then as you continue it's for a long time you're halfway right make my scroller is here my scrubber so halfway into the shop we're still here so you still haven't utilized this at all in any way and then as you continue now we're finally getting into a kind of a balanced composition and we are over two thirds like three quarter into the shop and by the time you ended you're here which we're left again with the crazy amount of left screen space so you might be better off having this guy around here and then you take your camera and then you just kind of you pan over don't translate i mean it's just a lot of translate movement i think you'll be fine with just rotating panning over so that's the first thing when i saw it uh the other thing is he comes in which i like i like that i like that walk kind of stops i'm not sure you might also have a really wide lens it feels like when he comes in like there are moments where he kind of feels tilted over this way even here there's something that feels like he's tilted this way it might just be given this bend of the tree it might be the lens that gives you almost like a fisheye lens like even here feels like straight but then there's a lot of tilting over this way so check your lens i don't know if it's a below 35 if you're now not gonna on a 25 a 20 lens i don't know on your fove so but he comes in what i like the walk looks over there and then it gets then you go kind of out of the character so he comes in settles again what's going on here and then as he turns this is a bit too animated where he like he leans over to anticipate comes over and that's kind of a subtle wiggle and that feels a bit too animated where like you're adding the principles and it's not really that character driven does that and then we kind of look and the thing is i don't quite understand the thought process here he stands there so i'm assuming well maybe he heard something over here and then he looks up so i'm assuming well something something should be happening here right and then suddenly he starts walking kind of a sneak and then it gets a bit bigger and then he gets animation wise very slow i think after this point you gotta ramp it up and make it up faster but then he gets into this throws it and then also that settle is too slow it is this would be throw like you need a couple more steps for all that momentum i will one more step here and then the other leg here so he would end up around here but again he was looking up here right but everything is happening over here so i'm not quite sure what this acting choice was for him to look up so that would be that would be my impression on this shot composition is a bit off so if you want to do if i check your mail right you're mentioning uh body mechanics exercise trying to show some personality and character with a little storytelling too um if you want to make this a bit more complex imagine right this guy this guy would be here this is your beginning actually he's here and he's walking over this way he walks and walks and walks and stops so he ends up maybe here and then imagine he does kind of a he keeps looking out of this chain just your animation completely i'm just throwing out ideas he's there and it's a bigger uh like he stands and it's a bigger it's a bigger head turn it's because it's like he's looking and goes oh what's that so there's a bigger i saw something which makes him so he stands around here which makes him kind of jump tipito over here goes behind the tree so we lose him and the audience goes oh where is he what's going to happen then he kind of peeks out here right he would have just his head here his arm could be holding the tree looking and then he has a bigger take knowing that there's something over here and then he starts his his tipito run throw the the spear over this way that would be something a bit more interesting since you have the trees right up is right now you're not using the trees at all it's cool to have a certain set you know it's not just an empty background but it would be interesting to use this where he goes around the tree and comes back out just to use the space a bit more the depth um that would be something and then during all his moments where he turns and see something bigger bigger moments where he turns and maybe he like he goes like this or he does that or looks like this or like leans forward a couple moments where we can tell he's not sure what's going on and then you need a moment of oh this is what i wanted so he looks and goes like this maybe you look around and then now this is what i gotta do it's a couple moments of him realizing or trying to find what's going on and then realizing oh now i can kill that creature and move forward with that so again you're just moving basically here and then here well actually here sorry this is your plane this is your plane of movement so if i make this clean here and then here this is your plane of movement go here and all of this up to here so it would be to me a bit more interesting if you come out this way wait a bit go around come around here and then this way at least that or you have this and you make it crazy and this is your your beginning of the shot right so we don't really see this you cut the composition right so you cut all this off this is your the non-red area this is all you see and maybe he comes in from from here and then he kind of he has his spear on his back right so he kind of crawls down looks around sees something jumps down boom and then sneaks and then shoots the guy again this is totally different animation but since you have the trees and he seems to be a native some forest some jungle you know some tribe what if that's what he's used to he's used to climb on trees and maybe he can have a little goes around jumps off i don't know like something where you can use again the depth where you want to go in and out of the scene and potentially use the trees i don't know something just as an idea throwing it out there that is it let me know what you think all right thank you all right there's an email you can sign up you can start whenever you want you can submit whatever you want you get 16 submissions either way a like and subscribe would be awesome all right thank you