 and welcome to the 21 Convention at Tampa, Florida. This speaker that we have for you today is actually just a phenomenal guy. If you have not witnessed his 21 Convention speeches previous, definitely check those out. He's also been a host of two conventions and featured on the 21 Convention podcast. If any of you guys want to know about sex in a crazy form of awesome, threesome, open, relate, whatever you want to call it, you're gonna have to check that one out, find it on the YouTube channel. But you can find him at interconfidence.com and his name is Robbie Cramer. Let's come on up. Thanks, buddy. Always gives the best introductions. Hey guys, how's everyone doing? Good. Good. So today, I'm gonna be talking about the most underrated way to communicate with women. Anyone have any idea what that is? Texting. Second, close the camera a bit. Close second. So I'm gonna be talking about texting. And before I decided to talk about texting, I was having this dilemma. And I'm sure the other speakers at the convention can relate. It's the speaker's dilemma. Like what am I gonna do my talk about? Cause I know there's so many awesome speakers here that are gonna be talking about a bigger picture on dating, approaching, day game, inner game. There's so many facets on your hero's journey to improve as a man. And my dilemma is always, I wanna give kind of like the big picture, raw raw speech, you guys need to go out and improve your lives, but you're already here. Like I don't have to tell you guys that. You're already here, you're investing in yourself. You're doing what it takes to become a better version of you. And that's essentially what I've been doing for the last 12 years. And it's my full time job helping other guys do that same thing. So I didn't wanna preach to the choir. I also, there's techniques and there's principles, right? There's principles of what's going to make you a better guy. You guys all heard Socrates' speech where he gave that amazing picture of what it looks like to date in modern day society. And I'm sure you guys could all kind of see where you fit into that. And I really wanted to give you guys something very tangible that you could walk away with that you could just start running and using immediately. And I find that the most important thing that guys kind of just don't realize the importance is texting. Because if you get a phone number and your texting is lame, you're never gonna get a date. Like the competition's out there. Ask any beautiful woman. She'll give her number out to many, many, many guys. Which means she's getting many, many, many texts and phone calls and carrier pigeon messages. And she only has so much time. She only has seven days a week. So why would she see you? If you made an amazing first impression, your texting doesn't have to be as good. But sometimes, like when it comes to day game, which is my favorite way to approach women, he might only have two minutes, three minutes, versus the guy who chatted her up in a bar for an hour and a half. How do you get that date when you didn't have much time? So I'm gonna be talking about texting. I'm gonna be giving you guys a ton of information. Take some notes, cause there's some good stuff in here. And I also wanna say that, you know, this is how to keep a woman happy, right? There's a lot of stuff going on when it comes to dating relationships, becoming a better guy. And you guys have heard a lot of that. And for you guys listening at home, listen to all these 21 convention talks. They're amazing, right? You have to be well dressed. You have to be a great communicator. You have to text. You have to be confident. Your internet game has to be on point. You gotta be fearless. So there's many, many facets, but I really wanted to give you guys some real tangible stuff. So let's get onto it. You got a number, now what? So when I first got into the whole seduction community pickup artist thing, there was all this stuff out there on phone game. And I was like, what is this phone game, text game? Online game, there's too many games to learn. And I quickly realized that you can just eliminate calling from the equation almost completely. Unless the girl's over 35 and she grew up without smartphones, even then. Very rarely will you come across a girl who does not use text messaging as her primary means of communication. Text messaging these days is the easiest, most frictionless way to communicate with people. Easier than email, go straight to your phone. When a girl gets a text, you get a little excited. When you guys get a text, you get a little excited. It's like you're opening a birthday gift, right? So the whole do not call theorem. I realized that when I wanted someone's resources, like either a guy who had something I wanted or a woman that I wanted to date, I realized that in order for me to try to get those resources, I would pick up the phone and call. And they would send me a text back. Conversely, if someone wanted my resources, they would call me and I would text them back. So it stands that the dude who wants shit calls and the dude who has shit texts. So if you wanna be the guy who has shit, then you should also text. If you get a woman's phone number and you call her before texting her, I'd say 75% of the time, you'll never hear from that girl again. It's painful for a girl to have to pick up the phone for a guy that she doesn't really know. Her phone's gonna ring. She's gonna be like, uh, do I really wanna pick up this phone call right now? This seems a little, I don't know, I don't know, what's he gonna say? What's gonna happen? Oh, I'll just let her go to voicemail. Then you're like, shit, what kind of voicemail do I leave? Am I funny? Am I straight forward? Have you guys seen the movie Swingers? He calls, he leaves like seven voicemails and she decides that he's a total weirdo creep. So, you do not need to call women. Really ever. I mean, my girlfriend right here, Genevieve, how often do we talk on the phone if it's not going on some sort of, unless there's a good reason to call? Like, we text back and forth all the time. It's amazing. It's easy. You don't need to call. Forget it. How to start a text conversation that doesn't suck. This one sucks. Hi you, how are ya? Nice shoes, hi you, hey. And if you see down here, this girl actually posted this on Instagram and it says, men take note, if you send me 122 messages in three months and I don't respond, it means I'm not interested. Hashtag take a hint, hashtag go away, hashtag now you're blocked, hashtag stock my life. This sucks. Let's talk about how to start a text conversation that doesn't suck. The first one is callback humor. So, let me go back one. What is callback humor? If I'm out and I meet a girl at a Starbucks and we have a five minute conversation and during that conversation we both talk about how much we like running or how much we like hockey. We connect over some commonality and that's the thing that I remember about the conversation. I'm going to use some sort of humor that's relevant when I text her back. So an example of that, take this girl Daria. I met Daria at a Petco. I was buying food for my dog. She was there with her little dog and I use the ridiculous line because I'm usually out with my dog. If I see another girl with a dog or even if she doesn't have a dog, I'll walk up to her and I'll say, hey, have you heard of Cesar Milan? You know, like the dog whisper? Well, I'm kind of like Cesar Milan. I speak to my dog and your dog just told my dog that you have a crush on me. It's the most ridiculous, corny, lame, stupid line but it's just so over the top and goofy it works. And of course I call myself out afterwards and I'm like, sorry for the cheese ball line but she gets the point, right? Now we're in a conversation. So that's what happens with Daria. And I texted her later, hey, it's Prince Cheeseball Charming from Petco and his sidekick Wiley. She gets a text like that and she obviously knows who it is and it's now it's fun, it's flirty. It's a great conversation. Here's another way to start a conversation because you don't always know what you can't always go back with callback humor. Sometimes you won't think of anything or you can't think of anything that was funny about the conversation but this line is great. Called the standard protocol line. So this is a girl that I met named Samira, met her at a bar. I was so drunk I couldn't remember much of what we talked about which killed my chances for recall humor. This text makes me, makes fun of the silly line in the Swingers movie that you have to wait three days before texting a girl. So the line is, hey, first name. I know it's standard protocol to wait three days before texting but I wait five. I know, I know. I'm a gangster, LOL. She's going to follow up with something like this. It's three business days so you're not doing too bad. Smiley, how you been, right? The last way, and for all of you guys out there that love to meet women during the day, this is a text that you can always send that will always be relevant to that interaction, all right? And it's simply flipping the script. If I hit on her during the day, I'm going to accuse her of hitting on me which is, hey Jenny, I thought it was really impressive slash courageous how you randomly approached and hit on me yesterday. Robbie, PS, Wiley was impressed too. I was my dog. That was a little bit of callback humor infused with the flip the script line. So this is a lot better than sending the, hey, how's it going? Hey, I'm Johnny. Remember me? It's just boring, it's lame. Now, who here knows what a meme is? Hopefully everybody. In April of 2013, I stumbled across a meme. And, hold on, let me go back. So I'll find you guys a meme. That's a meme. Any sort of writing with a picture on it, right? And I realized that one of my favorite ways to text girls was using memes. The beauty of a meme is that you can say, the meme does the talking for you. So you can send ridiculous pictures with words saying exactly what you want without being guilty of saying that thing. And I'm gonna come back to memes in a second here because they're one of the secrets to becoming really, really awesome in your communication. So before I do, the pillars of a text conversation. What most guys do, and Brent Smith talked about this, is they text way too much. They just bomb the girl with information. They bomber with irrelevant details, silly things. The worst thing you can do in a text conversation is have a conversation that you would have in person. That is not what texting is for. Texting is for two things. It's for flirting, reminding her why she liked you, flirting, and setting up face to face meetings. That's it. Until you're in a relationship, until you guys have that familiarity, until you've had sex a few times, that's the only reason why you should be texting a girl. Either for flirting and to remind her when she's meeting you, setting up the date. Why text? Self amusement, all right? If all of your texts come from the mindset that you're having fun, you're amusing yourself and this is not something serious, you met her, you hope to take her out, you hope to have fun with her, you hope to hook up with her, et cetera. But if you don't, it's no big deal and you're gonna be amused no matter what her response is, even if she doesn't respond, you're gonna have fun with this and you're gonna be a lot more likely to succeed with those girls that you get their numbers. Quantity, less is more. Don't text, don't text too much to talk about nothing. So I have a buddy, his name is Joel and I hope he watches this video because he needs to know this and no matter how many times I tell him, I can't beat this into his head. Anytime he'll meet a girl, he'll have a text conversation that's longer than like the Torah scrolls. You could launch this thing out, it would go all the way from here to the end of the room and it'll just be back and forth, mindless, whatever, how's your day, how was your weekend, what's going on, she'll be telling him a life story, he'll tell her life story and it will never result in a date. This guy will spend hours and hours texting back and forth to never see girls. And I'll show you guys how easy it is, you can literally text her two or three times and that's all you need. So remember, it's all about investment. I use this term a lot. If you're investing more than she's investing, you're chasing her. You want that level of investment to be 50-50 and if you can get to the point where she's chasing you even a little more than you're chasing her, well then you're in the driver's seat. You can totally control where you want to take that interaction. So, I'm gonna talk about frequency as well. If you text her on a Thursday at 2 p.m. and she responds to you next Monday and you text her back one second later, what does that show? It shows that you're investing a lot more than her, right? If she responds to you instantly and you respond to her instantly when now you're on the same playing field. So you don't have to play games. You don't have to wait three days to text a girl because someone told you that you should but the communication back and forth should be equal. It's totally fine to have a real-time text conversation where she goes, you go, she goes, you go but if you respond to every single message within two seconds and she waits three hours, you're never getting a date with that girl. And another thing that you can do to see if you're in, to see how much she likes you to basically tell if you're good or not, it's really simple. If I look at someone's phone and I pull up a text thread, all I have to do to know if that guy's getting a date is look at, I call it the bubble test, all right? So the texts on one side should be about equal to the text on the other. You guys probably can't see that but if you look back and forth, there's pretty much an equal amount of texting going on on each side. And if I look at a guy's phone and I see all blue on this side and very little gray, I know he's dead. I know that's never gonna result in a date. That's all I have to see. That's it. So I covered memes a second earlier. I'm gonna talk about those a lot. Emojis. If you use too many emojis, you'll look really gay. Try to keep it to one emoji for like every two or three texts at the most, all right? Don't be the emoji guy. Girls love emojis. Let them use emojis. Don't use too many emojis, you'll look silly. Punctuation and grammar. Don't miss spell stuff. If you use your instead of you are, you'll look like an idiot. Whenever you're communicating in a nonverbal way, like be very aware of your intelligence level. You gotta make sure you come across sort of legit. If she thinks you're a total dunce, that's going to kill your chances. So be very aware of your grammar. Don't use too many emojis and memes. So I'm gonna go through this text message thread. This was posted by one of my clients in our group. And it's funny, cause at any one time, I'm usually texting somewhere in the neighborhood of 150 to 200 women. Now these aren't girls that I met. These are girls that my clients meet and they post a screenshot in the group and they say, Robbie, what should I say to this girl? You can ask Patrick and Tyler and Kevin, the other guys in this room. There's a ton of questions that are purely, how do I respond or what does this mean? She said this, I said this, where do I go from here? And I tell the guys all the time, the best way to become a really good texture is to let someone who's really good at texting text for you. And you'll realize that texting is, it's just pattern recognition. Just like a lot of the stuff is when it comes to meeting women and learning game. So I got good at texting by having a buddy of mine who was way better at it text for me. And I realized what he was doing. I saw a lot of great text that he used. I just copied those. And you obviously wanna add in your own personality. You wanna be authentic. But in terms of where you are, where you stand, how much love she's giving you, there's a lot you can learn from having someone else help you through that process. And it's great because it's so easy to do it. Let's talk about this. This is an interaction with Nancy T. He sets up a date. You can't see the text from the beginning, but he sets up the date and he says, meet 8.30 tonight by Parkside Dorms. Hey, Smiley, I might have to work, Brownie. I will text you around 3 p.m. to let you know. For sure, happy. Don't use too many emojis. You'll look like this girl. He responds, okay, sounds good. So far, so good. Okay, sounds good. Not pressuring into the date. Not jamming her to see if she's going to be available at a different time. Fine. She texts back, hey, I won't be able to make it today. Sorry. Hopefully. Some other time. She's flaking, okay? If a girl flakes on you the first time, it's usually not a good sign. I find that if I get flaked on for the first date, the odds of seeing her ever on a first date drop down to around 25 to 50%. So it's already a bad sign. But how you handle it is whether it's going to go between 25 and 50 or down to zero. All right? If you handle it poorly, it's going down to zero. I promise you that. His response, it's chill. Good, perfect, fine. No pressure, all good. Okay, thanks. He waits a few days and he sends her this. Hey, how was work slash your weekend get into any trouble, smiley? This text as whatever, it seems harmless. This actually killed him. This text is the kiss of death. And the reason why he will never see this girl again unless he bumps into her randomly. This is boring as hell, all right? And you guys all know this from your own experience. If someone texts you, hey, how was your weekend? What do you want to do? I want to pick up my phone and throw it across the room. And hopefully they're in the room so I can throw it at their head. Because it's so annoying. Do I really want to have a conversation about my weekend over text? I hardly want to have that conversation in person. Like when someone, hey, how was your weekend, buddy? Oh, it was good. You know, we did some cool stuff. How was yours? Oh, it was good too. Great, awesome, cool. It's fucking boring, right? So don't have those conversations during text because it forces someone, so she doesn't want to be mean, okay? She wants to be polite, she wants to be respectable. And if you force someone to have this conversation, she has two options. Either not to respond at all or to have an annoying, boring conversation. And once you've gone down that road, you're now the annoying, boring guy. And she's not excited to get texts from you. It's a drag. It's something she has to respond to. She's already busy. She's doing stuff. The last thing she wants to do is have a boring conversation via text. This is the last thing you want to do too. Don't feel the need to do this. So you'll see where this goes. This looks good, right? Oh, look, she's responding a lot. She goes, hey, Smiley, I just got off work. Ha ha, I am. It was busy and crazy and fun, ha ha. No, no trouble, ha ha. I worked yesterday morning and at night. I had to go to the Miss Bell Gardens pageant where I sadly passed on the crown to the new queen, ha ha. It was happy and sad moment, ha ha. How about your weekend? The first thing I told him was this girl sucks. She says ha ha after every sentence and she uses 10,000 emojis. And this looks like he's in good shape, right? They're going back and forth having a rapport conversation but that's exactly what you do not want. You do not want to have this conversation over text. It's boring. How about your weekend? Then he writes the novel. Where do you work that's so busy? Crazy and fun. Where do you work that's so busy, crazy and fun? It better not be Walmart or something, ha ha. My weekend was busy between going out and working. Don't worry, I know exactly what will cheer you up. Going out to grab drinks with me. You can tell me all about your glory days. So more boring rapport type conversation, followed up by another request for a date. What do you guys think she's going to respond to this with? Ha ha, I work at a family restaurant but the fun part was a pageant not work. Where do you work? I will let you know what day by Tuesday. Promise, ha ha. And sounds like fun for sure. The real kiss of death is the promise. By her saying promise, you know that he's really chasing her. She feels obligated to give him a date and time. She feels pressured and it's clear that he's dead. There's no way he's getting this girl out. She already flaked and now she feels badly that she can't give him another time. As humans, we only flake if something better comes up or something more important or urgent comes up in the meantime. If we really want to see someone, we'll make sure to see him, right? If you go out and you get a supermodel's number and she texts you, hey, what are you doing tomorrow? Nothing, I'm free. Didn't matter that you had a presidential dinner or something like that. You might skip that to go out with a supermodel. You will make time. When girls flake, it's almost always because they're not sold on you. So he says, ha ha, I see. Pageant does sound better than work. I'm a waiter at Lucille's, a barbecue place on second and PCH, cool. Ha ha, definitely way better. Oh nice, we both work at restaurants, ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. He thought he had a chance with this girl. When I saw it and I read through it, I knew it was done. And that is the number one way that guys screw up their texting interactions. They'll start out with something fun and then they'll go logical, boring, rapport type of conversation. That is a kiss of death. Do not ever ask boring questions that you wouldn't even want to ask in person. In fact, you don't need to really ask questions at all. I'll show you guys how to do it instead. Scheduling a date slash telling her out. So one thing that I like to make the distinction when it comes to asking women out versus telling a woman out, when you ask for a date, you're putting yourself in that traditional, kind of the way society creates these dating norms, like please, will you go out with me? Can I take you to dinner? Can I buy you some roses? And it puts you behind the eight ball versus if you tell her out in a really confident way, you're now standing out from the pack, right? This is wrong. Hey, what are you doing Wednesday? Or do you want to do X on Tuesday? The worst thing you could do for yourself is to propose a date on a certain day because odds are she's going to have plans already. Beautiful women have lots of opportunities to do lots of cool stuff. And I guarantee if you ask her on a Wednesday what she's doing Friday or Saturday, she's going to have other plans. And unless she really, really likes you, she's not gonna break them. And then the worst thing is if you say, hey, I've got tickets to this cool thing, are you free Wednesday? And she says no. Well, then you have to say what? Oh, what about Thursday or about Monday? And then you go back and forth in this pathetic chasing attempt to lock her down on a date. So don't do that. Don't ever ask for dates on specific days, especially first dates. If you've already slept with her and you guys have some sort of relationship, then this rule no longer applies. You can ask for a certain date, but first, second, third dates, don't do it. Hi, Jenny, may I please take you out to dinner on Saturday night? A gross barf. These are the text she's getting from that guy that I showed you the slides of in the beginning. The hey, how's it going? Hey, I like your shoes. Hey, how you doing? Why aren't you responding to my texts? Don't be that guy. So here's how I like to ask women out. Just gonna take notes on these. These are great lines. What does your week look like? I'm taking you on an A plus date and by A plus I mean C minus. Figure out a day you're free. I'm taking you out. I can guarantee a 33% chance of a good time in C minus conversation. So why do you guys think that works? Low expectations, sort of, not really. Essentially what most guys do is they try to oversell a girl on a date. They make it not about the connection, not about the time between him and her. They make it about this thing that they're doing. Hey, I wanna take you to the Super Bowl. Have you heard of it before? It's awesome. She doesn't care about going to the Super Bowl with you. I mean, if you ask a girl to the Super Bowl, she'll probably say yes, but that's not gonna help you get what you want. If you ask her out for coffee or drinks and you keep it casual and you make it known that you're having fun, you're amusing yourself, it's not that big of a deal if she goes out with you or not, she's gonna be way more likely to see you. She's gonna feel less pressured, she's gonna feel comfortable with you, and she's gonna laugh because you're doing the opposite of what every other idiot does. You're saying, hey, I'm gonna take you out and I'll do my best, my C minus conversation skills. Anyone who says that has to have A plus conversation skills because that's a humor. You're calling out the fact that every other guy is desperate and you're not. Okay? Couple more examples. Dear Julie, I'd like to take you out on a formal date and by formal, I mean beers, tacos, and darts. How's your schedule? How's your schedule? We're hanging out. I wanna take you out to a nice dinner. Chipotle or something, times are tough. When she gets these texts, when she sees the recall humor or the standard protocol line or the flip the script followed by one of these texts, the first thing she sees is like, oh, I remember this guy, he was fun. He was cool, he was crazy. He hit on me at Starbucks. And now he's asking me out and he's taking me to Chipotle. This is awesome. You're not actually gonna take her to Chipotle, but it doesn't matter, she knows you're kidding. And then there's memes. On a scale of one to America, how free are you next week? There's so much I wanna say. We could spend an entire hour talking about the genius of this, all right? And you guys are gonna see a lot of memes and why they're so great. It's hilarious, it's witty, and she's never been asked out before with a picture, I promise you that, unless she's talked to me or some of my clients. So she's gonna remember you as this crazy guy who hit on her at Starbucks, then she's gonna show her friend, she'll probably screenshot this, send it to her friend Julie. Can you believe this guy just asked me out via meme? This is amazing. She's gonna be really excited to go out with you. And anytime you have this great back and forth via text with a girl, you're way more likely to have an awesome date. She's showing up to that date with a lot of enthusiasm, she's having fun, she doesn't feel the standard sort of pressure that she would feel if a guy said, hey Jenny, it's really nice meeting you, and when are you free this week because I wanna take you out to dinner? You're gonna fall into that boring, stereotypical, awkward date. It's not what you want. Now, let's say you only have one night in town, you're traveling in Tampa, and you're leaving tomorrow, you have one more night, sorry, you're leaving Monday, and you meet a girl out tonight. What do you do? Well, if you try to ask her out that next night, that's a little pushy, but it's your only option. You can still do it, you just have to do it in a fun way. I think you should, A, meet me for drinks tonight, B, cancel the plans you have and meet me for drinks, C, cancel any early morning activities, work, or cancel any early morning activities slash work you have tomorrow that would otherwise create an excuse to not meet me for drinks, D, tell me to jump off a bridge. Again, you're being direct, you're being playful, you're providing options, and obviously the last one is completely obnoxious and absurd, tell me to jump off a bridge. But now her only options are A, B, C, or tell you to jump off a bridge, which is funny, she doesn't feel that pressure to have to, you know, she doesn't have to feel bad about letting you down. And if you can get a girl to, if you can create a situation where she doesn't feel pressure to let you down, you're going to do amazing with women, and you're gonna give them options, and they're usually gonna pick the option that you want. Now, let's say you screw up and you forget my advice and you ask a girl out on a certain day, or you've been going out with the girl a couple times and you think it's okay to ask her out on a certain night, you make plans for a Thursday, you buy two tickets to something, or you have this cool event you wanna take her to, and it's only that day, so you ask her for that day and she can't do it. You can save it with, well, this is awkward, because now I have to ask you out for a different day. Dug, dear Ashley, would you like to go on a formal date with me sometime soon? Yes, slash no, circle one please. P.S. Formal equals tacos, beers, bullshit. P.S. All right. If she's non-committal, I love this meme. If you don't wanna date me, that's fine. I get that, but you're wrong and I hate you. If you text the girl a few times and ask her out on a date, and she's busy, she's non-committal, she won't give you a time, don't ask her again, because you'll look needy. Sender that. It's not you saying it, it's this guy. So you're not guilty of it. That's the beauty of the meme. I didn't ask her out on a date, the bald eagle did. So confirming the date. Once you have the date set in stone, you have a time, you have a place, you text her earlier that day or the day before. I usually go for like 11 a.m. or noon around the day I'm gonna meet her. Still good for 8.30? I'll be at the corner of the bar wearing my red leather pants and feathered fedora. Obviously I'm not wearing leather pants or a feathered fedora, but it's funny, it's silly. When she shows up at the bar, I can quickly create recall humor. I don't have to start with a, hey, good to see you again. I can start with, oh, sorry, my leather pants with the dry cleaners. I hope you're not too upset. And now we're already engaged in a fun, witty banter conversation versus a boring, typical start to most first dates. Keep in mind, women, it's painful how many of my girlfriends tell me about terrible cookie cutter dates that they're always taking on. Dinner, movie, guy's super stiff, he's awkward, it's all forced. So when you stand out and you're funny and you don't make it a big deal, they love it. Another one, one to 10, you're excited in 9.7 about our date tomorrow, aren't you? If you say less, I'll know your line. No one likes a liar, smiley face. If she's late, which she will be, women are typically five to 15 minutes late for any date. You send her this about five minutes before. I'll be ready if she said I'll be ready in five minutes. She's gonna laugh, she's gonna show up to the date and you can have something to laugh about. It's so powerful to kick off a date with humor because it dissipates any sort of awkward tension. What if she doesn't respond to your texts? Don't ever say things like, did you get my text? Yes, she got your text. She didn't respond because she hates you. Why aren't you responding to my texts? She hates you. Are you alive? Pretty sure she's alive, she still hates you. Hello? Girls get these all the time, so bad. If you're that guy, you're dead. You send one of those texts, you're dead. Right, you hate me, don't you? Why is this good? Why does this work? It's sarcastic, it's over the top. It shows that it's essentially, it's calling out the fact that she didn't respond in a non-confrontational fun way. It's you didn't respond because you actually hate me, don't you? You're using her of hating you for not responding and she knows that you're kidding and I can't tell you how many interactions myself and my clients have turned around by sending this text, all right? Another example, did we break up? If so, I want my CDs back. Don't send that to a girl you're actually dating but she doesn't respond to your texts. She doesn't respond to your texts. It's great, it's easy. And my personal favorite, that time it took you seven years to write with the notebook. I figured I'd get more laughs for this one, I guess you guys haven't seen the notebook but you don't even need to see the notebook. You get it, right? Like, she doesn't respond to your text and you're going over the top. Remember, you're not saying it, she's saying it. No texts back, you hate me, don't you? The Dawson's Creek guy, James Van Der Beek. So, I actually have a meme for every single thing a girl could possibly text me. Now, call me crazy but here's my meme folder in my phone. So, for example, the girl who is saying a lot of ha ha's, I have a text in here that says, you guys won't be able to see it but do you guys know the guy, the New York politician, the rent is too damn high? You guys remember that guy, famous internet meme? So, when at any time a girl sends too many emojis or she says ha ha too often or she does something annoying in her texting, I'll say, well, this one says, the number of bitches who text how are you is too damn high. So, when a girl sends me a text, hey, how are you? Like before, I don't want to respond to that text so I sent her this meme which shows that I'm playful, I don't care, I'm making fun of her and then we get into more meme conversations. There's just so many in here. I have a whole, like I said, a whole database of these things and memes are just so much fun. The only time you shouldn't use memes is if you're older and it's gonna make you look ridiculous. Like your meming to texting ratio should be, in my experience, I would say for every three texts you send, you send one meme, you're in good shape. If she's under 23 years old, you can send her nothing but memes. When I first moved back from New York to LA, I met a girl out. She was 21, a USC student and I found out during the interaction that she liked memes. We're at a bar, I showed her my meme folder, she showed me her meme folder and I texted her nothing but memes for our entire relationship, which was just a casual, see her every once a week sort of thing. But I never physically sent her anything. I even had a meme, I created my own meme to confirm where I was meeting her on the first date. It was like a picture of me saying, I'll see you at Laurel Hardware at 8.30. Super cheesy and corny, but know your audience is what I'm saying. It's really important that you know your audience. If you get a woman's number who's super sophisticated and she's like a Stanford MBA and her sense of humor is not conducive to memes, don't send her a meme. But like I said, if you meet a 23 year old, you know, fun party girl, send her nothing but memes. So I can't really say the importance of that enough to know your audience. And if you can send these sort of witty, funny texts and follow up with memes, no one to ask for out, no one to confirm the date, it's really simple. Like I want you guys to be able to see exactly how this went and I don't want you guys to have to remember anything. So if you text this number, your name and email, I'll send you everything that's in this presentation. You can download all of the memes, you can copy those texts and it's really straightforward. You get a girl's number, you text her some sort of callback humor, flip the script, or a standard protocol line, something to remind her why you're fun, why you're cool. You text back and forth for at most three to six messages and then you set up a date. You go out with her, rinse and repeat. There's no reason to be having long, boring conversations, don't over text her, make sure the frequency of the texting is even so she's not investing, or so you're not investing more than her and have fun with this stuff. Everything in this presentation, hopefully you guys realize it's just me having fun, me amusing myself and that's really, really attractive to women. So I know this is just about texting but the bigger picture is huge here. If you can consistently communicate in this way, women will find you irresistible. There's nothing that shows that you're an attractive guy with an abundance of opportunity than being able to communicate in the way that most guys really suck at. Most guys are so bad at texting, they shoot themselves in the foot. Like I can't tell you how many clients will come to me and they say I get tons of numbers but I'm not getting dates. Like well have you ever considered that maybe you suck at texting? I just call them. All right guys, so that's my presentation. Give it up for Robbie Cramer. Who's got questions? Go ahead and raise your hands. So in your presentation I hear you saying the date, asking her out, drinks, Chipotle, that sort of thing. So that all implies that you're taking her out on a date. Is there some approach that you have that is not, hey I'm gonna buy you something when I see you. So the good question, I'm never trying to frame it whereas if I'm buying her something, right? But any normal date you're gonna meet at a coffee shop or a bar or a pool hall. Some sort of social place. Like unless you hooked up with her the night you met her at a bar, you're not gonna text her, hey meet me at my place. Unless you have a, you've already kind of created that sort of relationship. It's just too much too soon and you're gonna creep most girls out if you do that. There's outliers to every situation. But the point of me saying something like Chipotle is actually me making fun of the fact that I'm not gonna buy her something elaborate, right? We're just going out, we're gonna share a drink together, we're gonna have a fun conversation and no pressure. It's nothing to be like too concerned about. We'll see if we hit it off and if not no big deal. So that sub communicates that texting or saying Chipotle, sub communicates that it's no big deal and you're not having this money exchange. But sure, buy her Chipotle. Like if I invite a girl out for drinks, I'll pay for the drinks, which will cost me 20 bucks, whatever. And she'll probably buy the second round. One thing I'll do when I meet a girl out on a date is show up in the bar and there's always that awkward situation where you meet her and you wanna order drinks at the bar but you wanna keep the conversation going and it's the beginning of the date so there's already that kind of awkwardness and I can't remember who I stole this from but the idea is she walks in and you say, all right, find a place to sit, I'll go grab the drinks, first round's on me. That way you don't have to have that awkward conversation. She finds somewhere to sit, you go to the bar, you come back for the drinks and you've implied that she's buying the second round. If you wanna do that, if money's tight and you wanna do that, I have no problem springing for a couple rounds of drinks and it's actually a way that I can screen to see if she is really interested in me. If she offers to pay or if she offers to buy a round, I usually, I won't take her up on it. I'll say, no, it's cool, I got it but it shows me that she's just not there for the drinks and no girl's gonna meet you out for a one-on-one date if she just wants free drinks. That's just not gonna happen. Other questions, guys? So my question is the utility of dirty text messages. Obviously a bad idea before you banked but there are a hell of a lot of fun to write but I'm not sure if there's a good idea to be doing. Yeah, that's dangerous. Sexting, I guess you can call it. My general rule of thumb when it comes to sexting or dirty texts are proceed with extreme caution and pretty much, I very, very, very, very rarely use them at all but they do have amazing memes for that because remember, it's not you saying it. It's the meme. There's a group of memes that are called some e-cards and they're very sexual in nature and they're sexual but they're funny at the same time so you're creating sexual tension and you're dissipating the sexual tension with humor. The only time where I'll get in a dirty talk sort of text conversation is with the girl that I've probably already slept with or if she instigates it, if I text her back and forth a few times and she just out of the blue says, I really want you to bend me over and take me to town and I'll be like, oh well, obviously. I'm getting a green light here, you can go with it but I'm never instigating dirty talk or sexual stuff. It's just too high risk. There's really no point in doing it and a lot of other guys do it and if a lot of other guys are doing it it means you shouldn't be doing it. You wanna go in opposition of the pack so good question. What else we got? There's a question here. What is the craziest text message you've ever received? Craziest text? Or perhaps what's the craziest one you've ever sent? Hmm. There's been so many. I'm trying to think. What led to the story you don't wanna tell right now? I'm getting suddenly a lot hotter up here. I guess it's not, I can't really think of it, most like stories are coming to mind or like specific events but what I've seen happen, not just with me but some clients, I think a guy posted in my group a few months ago how he literally had like a 30 second interaction with a girl. Met her at Starbucks. I think he walked up to her and said, hey, I had a risk embarrassing the hell out of myself come over here and meet you. I'm Joe. She says, hey, I'm Jenny. Joe goes, I really gotta run. I'm meeting a friend but I'd love to chat with you more. Give me your number. If you don't like me, give me a fake one. I'll never know the difference. She gives him her number. He texts her about five minutes later and sends the flip the script line. She fires back with like, ah, that's not how I remember it. I remember you hitting on me. They joke back and forth, maybe two or three texts and he follows up with the American Eagle meme but he changed it from a scale of one to America how free are you tonight? She says, well, I'm actually free starting in the next hour. They met up an hour later and they ended up hooking up that night. So his interaction with her was literally 30 seconds in exchange of five texts and that led to an amazing adventure and experience that he had with a girl that a city that he didn't live in while he was traveling. So if you're really confident and you hit on a lot of women, as Sasha was saying, you guys need to be approaching a lot, not just because you're going out to get numbers but there's no faster way to pushing through the fear and to be able to really express yourself in your truest nature. Like, I don't approach women to get numbers. I approach women to have fun and to become more self-expressed. The outcome is I get numbers. The outcome is that they like me but I do it because I love to do it. I love to push myself and I had terrible approach anxiety, worse than anyone. I spent $3,000 on a boot camp back in 2006 and the only promise of the boot camp was to make you hit on girls during the day. That's it. Guys ran up to like a hundred girls and I said, hey, you're really cute. See you later. But that's what I needed to do. So I can't emphasize the importance enough of approaching, getting a lot of reps and pushing your comfort zone, stepping into your fears and that will really transform you into a guy super confident, magnetic and all of the texting stuff, anything. It'll just make the game meeting women, finding an amazing companion that much easier. Awesome. You guys got any more questions for Robbie Cramer? Well, there we go. Robbie Cramer, interconfidence.com.