 For most people, their life will never change. And the reason that it never changes is because it is very, very predictable. They listen to the voice of fear instead of the voice of doing what they actually want to do, their intuition and their gut. Now in this video, I thought I would share the three main reasons why your life is the same year after year after year and something you can do about it. Hey guys, I'm Alex Heim, author of the book, Master the Day. Now before we jump in, I've put together a free journaling worksheet right below this video, which will help you figure out how to design your dream life and what are some daily habits you can do every day to make that life a reality. So check it out, the link right below this video. Now I had a friend go home to see his high school friends recently. And he said that what was always the upside and the downside of that is that they were just old high school friends shooting the shit and going to a bar. They had some old laughs. They talked about history. It was the good old times, but he came back with a little bit of a bidder sweet tone when he said that, you know, the funny thing was I had a good time, but everyone is pretty much exactly the same as they were five years ago, 10 years ago, 20 years ago from high school. In fact, really not much has changed at all. And he said, you know, one thing I've always admired about you is that you really were never afraid of putting yourself out there. I always admired you for having guts. Now I don't think of myself as being that different from anyone else, but one thing that I've seen is that if there's any one thing that will keep your life small, the same as it's always been, it's fear. If you decide to make your life decisions based on fear, as opposed to what excites you and what you're passionate about, your life for sure will always stay the same year after year after year. Most of the time when I look around at people who genuinely want their life to change, they want to travel, they want to find love, they want to build a business, maybe they wanna write a book or become a YouTuber. They genuinely want these things, but when it comes to their daily decision-making criteria, it's not, this is an action aligned with my dream. It's, oh man, if I write a book, what are they gonna say? It's, if I create a YouTube video, oh my God, I'm putting myself out in public for people to leave comments saying whatever they want on my stuff. It's, if I ask out that girl in public at that coffee shop, it's gonna be awkward if she says I have a boyfriend or no, or she just looks weird and creeped out by my comment. It's, if I go to this country that's maybe a little unsafe or off the beaten track, dealing with all my friends and family that are like, why would you ever go to Croatia? That's not safe, that's near Bosnia and that's near Montenegro. That's not a safe place to go. Why would you go there of all the places? Go somewhere fun in Western Europe. Most of the time your life stays the same because even though there are things you love and you want to do and there are dreams you have, when it comes down to the wire to the decision, your decision is based on fear, which is staying the same. It's not based on love, which is the passion of going after one of your dreams. You know, think about it day to day. Why do most people date or marry the person they date or are married to? Like just think about the people that you know in your life. Did they say they married or they're with their dream person or is it, it's a kind of a little bit of a safe, secure scenario. You know, oh yeah, she was cute, but not too cute that I'm gonna have to worry about her, you know, getting hit on all the time. You know, when you talk to people about their spouses, it's like, they're with who they're with not because that's their dream person but because that is very often a safe person and they'll never admit that to you because they often will not admit that to themselves. They are dating someone that's good enough. That's like having a job that is good enough or a dog that's good enough or writing a book that's good enough. No one ever sets out with the intention of a good enough life. That's some bullshit, right? What you want is a dream and a dream doesn't feel internally the same way as it's good enough. But people marry and date people that are safe, which is a synonym for fear. I'm afraid of going after what I really wanted. People settle for dreams that are safe because they're too afraid to go after the thing that they really want. And so they settle for being the accountant or the finance guy or the esthetician because those are things that they know they probably won't fail at and they'll do an okay job at. People don't go after the careers they really want or upload videos to YouTube because they're too afraid of what will they say. And so throughout your life all of these big dreams that you have will never come true unless you stop listening to the voice of fear, which wants you to stay the same. It wants you to stay small. It wants you to take the risk only on things you already know you can do and win at, which is not a risk at all. That's not a gladiator if you walk into the arena knowing that you're going to survive. But that's exactly what so many of us do every day in our lives. So in my mind, one thing I've seen is that if there is anything that will keep your life the same it's making safe decisions based on fear. I want to issue a 90 day challenge for you. I was speaking to one of my mentors, a medical mentor and he said that in his twenties he actually had cancer and it led him to a lot of the revelations he has today when he treats cancer patients of his own. And one thing he said to me was that you know when you have cancer because it is such a radical and extreme illness you have to radically change your life. Not just clean up your diet and start exercising and not be so angry, you have to radically change your life. 180 degrees, maybe that means getting out of that marriage maybe it means quitting that job maybe it means moving to an environment that's more peaceful and conducive to healing. And it made me think for so many of us with fear you have to do a dramatic experiment and here's what that is for you, my challenge. For 90 or 100 days, I want you to make every decision not out of fear. Not out of fear is the criteria. So let's say if what you feel often you're afraid of is loneliness and the way you fill this void is by being on your phone or on social media or by always asking people to hang out. If loneliness is your fear I want to issue a challenge that the next few weekends don't make any plans with anyone. Sit in your apartment alone or go for walks or just go work out alone and deal with the loneliness. Make the brave decision, not the easy one. If for you, the fear is being broke or being single then you know what for being broke live on a dollar a day for the next 90 days. Eat rice and vegetables and canned beans for three months or even just 30 days and you'll realize it wasn't that bad. If your fear is of being single or never finding love then maybe just for a few months, just date yourself. Just work on yourself, get hobbies, build new friendships, go to events in your neighborhood or in your community. And if it's something else, if it is asking someone out then every day whenever you see someone attractive just talk to them. The more you do this desensitization kind of therapy the more you're going to realize that as you chip these fears off your plate eventually you'll get to a point over a year where things won't scare you anymore. And when things don't scare you you'll start to make decisions aligned with your soul which is you'll start doing what you really want to do which is making the brave decision. So I want to leave you here today. Your life will never change if you make decisions based on safety or fear or the known path. If you want to build your most incredible life do what scares you the most and make those decisions towards your deepest, biggest dreams and don't live a small life based on fear because that will keep you the same. That's what I have for you today guys. Check out the journaling worksheet below and I'll see you soon.