 Your Coca-Cola bottler presents, Claudia, based on the famous play and novels by Rose Frankin. Brought to you transcribed Monday through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola. Relax. And while you're listening, refresh yourself. Have a Coke. And now, Claudia. Oh, isn't this a wonderful night for sitting home by the fire? Anything you want, David, before I settle down? Nope, no thing. As soon as I light my pipe, I'm settled fine. It's certainly easy to please, darling. Oh, it's lovely, just the two of us. So cheap, too. What's so cheap? What? No, an evening at home. No. I like it better than any other evening in the world. You do, huh? All for nothing. Set for the initial investment, I'll keep. Well, cheaper is why you like it better. Of course. As a matter of fact, that reminds me, there is something I want. Oh, here I am. Not you, dope. The Sears Robot Catalon. Oh! You're handed over to me? What for? What do you think for? I don't know. What for? To look up a telephone number. What for? Are you really going to buy something? I told you I'm going to look up a telephone number. What are you going to buy? Go on. Tell me what you're going to buy. Questions, questions, questions, all-time questions. Do they sell questions in the Sears Robot Catalon? Mmm, in stainless steel. Well, I have heard they sell everything. Here's your beloved catalog. Mmm, thank you. Say, what are you going to buy? You'll see. Now, if you want to look in the Sears Robot Catalon with me, I don't mind. Oh, that's sweet. That's all right. Well, sit on the sofa so I don't have to breathe down your neck. Well, well, you're getting trained. Mmm. Now, there. I'll tear out the order blank from the back of the book. You got a pencil? Bet you anything. It's something for the barn. What is? What you're buying, of course. Is it? Mmm, you're so bright. David, I don't want compliments. I want a yes or no. Page 1106. Let's see for yourself. Well? Well, all they're selling on page 1106 are worm killers and low-cost pest control. Pest control. You don't have worms or pests, do we? Well, I don't have worms. Very funny. Very funny. Seriously, what are you buying this stuff for? I'm not buying this stuff. See up here, right there. Farm master hog mineral feeder. What on earth is that? It's a four-door feeder that saves time, labor, and feed. Well, we haven't got four hogs. No, we will have. We will. The first place Ruby's going to give us another litter. Well, you certainly can't call little piglets hogs. No, but it will be someday. In the second place, I'm seriously thinking of getting a few more hogs. Matthew Warren is wanting to get rid of some. Hey, we're really going into business, aren't we? Selling milk, selling hogs. That's what you want, isn't it? Very much what we want, David. This farm master hog master feeder, what you might call it, certainly looks like an efficient contrast. I mean, it is that. Only 2350. Only. Made of air-seasoned lumber. The opening is strong masonite pressed wood. It holds salt, grain, and protein supplement. Ten bushels. Beautiful, isn't it? Stunning for a hog feeder. Are you filling out the mail order blank? Oh. Oh, yes, oh, yes. Number three, two, L, M, five, nine, oh, nine. F. F. Here we are. I'll have to make out a check. Is that all you're going to buy? Yeah. It's all Fritz and I discussed. David, I think it seems silly to send for just one thing. Oh, you do. I mean, while we're putting a stamp on the envelope, we might as well put more in the envelope. In other words, there's something that you want to buy, too. Well, I... Well, go on, go on, sit. Don't be shy. Well, it's just a few little things. No, just a few little things. I've been meaning to buy them. This is a perfect opportunity. Oh, I see. Save me making a trip to the village. Or a stamp. Yeah. Well, now first we need another fixture for the bathroom mirror. Shade is loose on the one we have. David, can you find the page for lighting fixtures? Shading fixture, page 877. 877. 877. There you are. Oh, look. There's a nice one. See that one? $1.69. Very handsome. Mm-hmm. Now, we'll put on the bathroom mirror light fixture. Put down bathroom mirror light fixture, $1.69. Now, let me see. Let me see. Well, while you were thinking, Fritz did mention he could use another milk can. Milk can. Milk can. Milk can. Let me see. That's funny. I can't find it. Milk can. Milk can. Milk can. Milk can. Here it is. $2.61. Where? $2.61 right there. You're looking right at it. Oh. Well, I told you I could find it. You did. Oh, yes. I know what else. I need a pair of scissors. I have to have the pair. We have sharpened. David, I don't think the whole house should depend on one pair of scissors, do you? All depends on how many things you have to cut. Oh, we cut all the time. No, we do. Here's a nice pair of dollars. Wait a minute. $98. $98. Right. It's cheap. Cheap. Right, guys. Everything is just amazingly cheap, isn't it, David? Mm-hmm. Particularly since it'll only cost us a $0.03 staff. Yeah, particularly. Oh, now I remember something else I need desperate. I'll bet it's desperate. Yes, I need new kitchen edging. Kitchen edging. Mm, stuff that goes around the shelf. Oh, well, that must be desperate. It is. Stuff we have is all sort of frazzled. Frazzled. David, I don't think you realize how important a woman's kitchen is to a woman. Maybe not, but I still wouldn't want yours to be frazzled. Thank you. That's all right. Sweetie. This is stunning edging. Plastic, washable, lasts a long time. It lasts a long time. It's just what we need. $0.10 a yard, too. $0.10. How many yards do you want? How many yards. How many yards. Well, let me see. $0.10 isn't much. Don't you lose your head. Use it. How many yards did you buy the last time? $0.15. $0.15 yards? Yes. You're using yourself with this plastic edging? Of course not. I'm just going to hang the kitchen in it. Oh, I see. David, listen to it. $0.10 a yard. $0.10 times $0.15. Hurry up. Work it out. $1.50. $1.50. I'm not arguing the price. If you need it, you need it. That's all. You're a wonderful husband. You know it. Mm-hmm. Here. Write this down on the blank. Always changing the subject. Plars. Oh, how much for plars? Tell you right away. Plars. Page 921. 921. 921. Oh, here we are. There's one at $1.59 and one at $1.55. Oh. Well, by the $1.59 one. Why? It's more expensive. It must be better. That is a fallacy that the female brain indulges in. Well, then why isn't it better? Well, maybe it's different. It's the same to me except it's four cents more expensive. Oh, David, go on. Blow yourself by the better one. The $1.55 one is good enough for me. You're always the one who wants me to spend money. But for yourself, no. Take the $1.59. No. Not anything else you can think of you want. We can't spend all night on this. Why not? I think it's fun. Let me see. Now let me see. Oh, I was just going to go shopping with the baby. There are very cute things for children in the catalog. Oh. Now let me see. Children, children. Oh, David. Wouldn't he look adorable now? In what? Soft cotton knit creepers. Soft cotton knit creepers. Two button shoulder. Two button shoulder over. Tempting blue. Isn't it adorable? Isn't it nice? Darling, that little suit is for a mere baby. Well? Well, after all Bobby's over seven months old, you can't keep dressing him up as a baby. It says your size is to 18 months. Well, look at the picture of this little boy. He's nothing but a baby. Standing up, which is more than Bobby could do. Well, Bobby will be running all over the place any day now. Only just creeping face to face. I won't have my son dressed in baby, baby clothes. Well, then I'll just buy him only one of these suits. I promise, the minute you come into his room, I will change him into a gray flannel double-breasted suit. Mm-hmm. And split his personality in the bargain. I guess that's all I really need. How about you? I can't think of anything else. Well, then add it up and we'll write out the tech. Add it up. $33.81. What did you say? $33.81. But, David, it can't be that much. What can't be? Well, that's a fortune $33.81. That's what it adds up to here. Right there. We hardly bought anything. Everything was so cheap. We got 67 things there. Well, that plastic edging is only $0.10 a yard. 15 yards? That's $1.50. Well, I'm certainly not going to spend any $1.50 on plastic edging. What we have in our kitchen is good enough. It's frazzled. $1.50. I never heard of this thing. Go on, David. Subtract $1.50. All right. $1.50 from $33.81 to $32.31. My goodness, you subtract so fast. You do it. That's still an awful lot of money, David. Money certainly flies. Well, what's that $261 for? The milk can. Fritz really needs another milk can? Well, not today or tomorrow, but one of these. Let's wait till the day after. What do you think? Might as well, since it's not so urgent. $261.00. Subtract it. $261.00. $261.00. $261.00. $261.00. $261.00. $261.00. $261.00. $261.00. What's that $69.00. $69.00. That's a light fixture. The old one can do. It's only cracked. Not broken. Wait, let's fold off the wall. $29.70. Who do they think we are? Who do they think we are? The catalog people. They think we're made of money. Subtract $69.00. $69.00. $28.01. Well, that's still too much money. You know, actually, I don't see why a house can't get along on one pair of scissors. Who said a house couldn't? Well, this one can. I'll just have the old one sharpened. That'll do just fine. Thank you. You're welcome. That's all right. $26.00. $26.03. And what's that $1.55 there? Chop off the pliers. You don't really need pliers, do you? You have a pair. Well, if I don't need a second scissors, you don't need a second pliers. Five seconds ago, I was the expensive one. That's $1.55. $24.99. $24.99. Do you know that would buy the groceries for a whole week? $24.99. David, these times a person just can't afford to throw money around. Who's throwing money around? Remember, someday we'll have to put Bobby through college. Then how about not dressing him in baby clothes anymore? If he's going to be a college man, he can't go around in pink and blue and baby runners. I mean, run around in baby creepers anymore. I don't think you love your son. Well, I couldn't agree with you. All right, all right. $23.50. What on earth is $23.50 for? The hog feeder. Darling, we only have Ruby. I explained to you that we're going to have more. David, $23.50. I feel it coming. Think of all the things you could buy with $23.50. I'm thinking that's right. And I want to buy this hog feeder for $23.50. But then we'll have to get the hogs to keep the feeder busy. Here we go, here we go. And with the money we spent tonight, we can't afford them. All right, all right. You win. No hog feeder. Now we're not buying anything. So that saves us $33.81. It's not a bad saving for one evening. Claudia, it isn't any saving. Of course it is, David. Here's the check. Here's the robot. $33.81. Not ours to deposit in the bank. Don't you feel rich? No, not Claudia. Try, work, try to understand. That money. Oh, darling, don't make it complicated. There's nothing to understand. I knew staying home was cheap, but I certainly didn't realize we'd be $33.81 richer than we were 15 minutes ago. Well, we're not. David, we are. It's obvious. Oh, it's obvious. Now my only problem is, what shall I buy you with it? Buy me? After all, $33.81 doesn't grow on trees. Well, that one did. Darling, what would you like with this money that we couldn't have afforded otherwise? You can catch a favorite radio show on the wing, as it were. Or you can make an occasion of listening. Ask a few friends in. Serve ice-cold coke and build a real party around the program. But whether you listen alone with the family or with guests, ice-cold Coca-Cola can always be counted on to help you listen refreshed. Yo, I think I'm losing my mind. Money not spent is not money saved, is it? Well, yes, in a way it is. Oh, you and Claudia, you're in cahoots. No, you forget, David. I'm a married man, longer than you. My thinking's all mixed up. I can understand that. Well, I think I'll go to bed before Claudia spends any more that she hasn't saved. First, a word of advice. A word of advice? Make a mental note to remind yourself to buy a collar button tomorrow. A collar button? I have a collar button. Well, have another. You won't be sorry at all that you did. All right, all right. I'll take your advice and do it. I'll try to remember. So long, Joe. Bye, David. Every day, Monday through Friday, Claudia comes to you transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola. So listen again tomorrow at the same time. And now this is Joe King saying, Au revoir. And remember, whoever you are, whatever you do, wherever you may be. When you think of refreshment, think of Coca-Cola. Or Coca-Cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes. And ice-cold Coca-Cola is everywhere. This broadcast of Claudia was supervised and directed by William Brown Maloney. And now here's a word from your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola.