 So, like I said, my name is Daryln and I'm one of the new counselors in the Counseling Center and I may know some of you, but I may not know all of you. So I just want to introduce myself, tell you a little bit about me. I am actually a graduate of Highline First Generation College student. Went to UW for undergrad and grad school and I'm a current doctoral candidate at Smith College for clinical social working, clinical social work, and I am just so happy to be part of Highline, to be part of the team, and to account of the privilege and an honor to be able to work with students and to support you during some of the most challenging times in your life. I don't take it lightly and I really value the time that you allow me to be in your presence. So today, we're going to be talking about social connections during physical distancing and really thinking about depression. And so we're going to be talking about a few, excuse me, I want to just share with you what we're going to be talking about today to give you a brief outline. We're going to be talking about the definition of depression and we're going to be looking at triggers for depression, thinking about our thoughts, our behaviors, how depression impacts our thoughts, our behaviors, our emotions, and even our bodies, and some common symptoms of depression, as well as how can we manage it, how do we take care of ourselves during this time, and specifically thinking about while social distancing or social isolation, how are we able to still keep those connections with the people who are important to us. So we're going to start off with just talking about what depression is. And you're more than welcome in the Q&A to just kind of add your own thoughts about how you would describe depression for yourself or in the community, anything like that you want me to read and share towards the end of the presentation. I can do that. But a lot of people describe it in different ways. And depending on, like, your experience, you'll have a different definition. And so for the purpose of this conversation, I just wanted to provide a definition that I think is pretty helpful. And it's one that I often share when I'm working with people. And it looks at the way like our emotions, our thoughts and behaviors, and physical, how all these ways are impacted by depression. Before I give you this example or definition of depression, I wanted to just talk about how common it really is, right? And so it's often considered as the common cold of mental health concerns, right? A lot of people experience it, a lot of college students experience depression. One third of Washington State college students identified that they have experienced depression within the last year. And this came from a study that was done in 2016-2017, where more than 10,000 students here in Washington State at both two-year and four-year colleges were asked the question. And this is what they answered. So it tells us that if you're experiencing this, you're absolutely not alone. And it's very common. The next thing I wanted to share with you about depression is that 47% reported negative mental health effects resulting from this pandemic, from the current pandemic that we're going through. So Kaiser Family Foundation, they did a tracking poll and this was completed March 25th to March 30th of this year. So right when we were starting to really see the impacts of this virus here in the United States. And it was 47% of those who were engaged in sheltering in place reported negative mental health effects resulting from worry or stress related to this virus. So again, we share this information with you. I'm sharing this information so that you can understand that it's a common experience and you are not in it alone. And I especially want you to know that because oftentimes, depression leads us to feel like we are the only ones going through this trying time. So let's move to this definition that I like to share about depression. It's when normal feelings like being sad, down, grumpy or irritable are very intense and they go on for too long. And they get in the way of normal life. And for normal life, it's however you define what that is for you. Depressed feelings happen to everyone, sometimes especially after a loss or disappointment. So when we think about it, when these symptoms or when depression symptoms happen too much and interfere with our life, like getting in the way of doing things that we want to do or things that we need to do, that's when it's a really a good time to think about how can I get some help to address this. Because we all get sad, we all have these, we all may experience some depressive symptoms, but your measurement should be around what is getting in my way. Am I no longer able to do the things that are important to me and that I am responsible for? And if that's the case, then that's a great time to reach out for support. And we'll talk more about some ways to do that as we continue. So I also want to share this a little bit around depression triggers. And these are some things that you may have experience with or if not personally, maybe someone really close to you. So things turning out badly in the way that you didn't want or a way that you didn't expect can definitely be a trigger for depression, lack of neurotransmitters in our brain. So like this physical response in our brain that can impact depression. Not getting what we've worked super, super hard for. Losing relationships. And this can be by death or it can also be by just like breakups or loss in general, losing independence, losing experiences. All of those can definitely be triggers for depression. Feeling rejected or being excluded from community, from group, from schools, from friends, from families, from society. All of those things impact mental health. And then reading about other people's problems and our troubles in the world. So just being empathetic and being concerned for other people can sometimes be a trigger for depression. Some more I would like to share are if you've had a previous episode of depression, it does increase the risk and it increases the risk for you to have another depression episode. If you have a family member who's had experiences with depression, that can definitely impact you. I mentioned like being sensitive or emotional or empathetic towards people. If you've experienced a lot of trauma, a lot of uncertainty in your childhood, that can definitely increase the risk for depression. Then biological females, the studies show like just the increase of hormones and the fluctuation of things. All those things really impact depression. And we're having this presentation, this time to talk with you, specifically thinking about depression during this time of the pandemic and thinking about COVID-19. And so we think about that like these triggers that are mentioned here are, you know, think about that in terms of also prevalent and important during COVID-19. So having a previous diagnosis of depression. You know, especially during this time, one of the things that you may want to do if you have been in depression is to stop like your treatment or just no longer go to counseling or no longer take medication. And if you have previously been diagnosed, it's a great time to continue your process of healing and continue your journey. So whatever your treatment plan was prior to to really commit to that. There's a great increase of unemployment going on right now in regards to the pandemic. So that is also a risk for depression. Lack of access to our supportive communities, faith-based communities, whatever it is that you feel a part of and you're no longer having the capacity or the ability to be able to meet with people. Fear about, I'm sorry, increased racism and discrimination. Nicole's talked about and I believe, I think Nicole talked about just all of the just activities and violence that is going on in communities of color right now and how that, even if it doesn't happen to you personally, being a member of community with a identity situated in those communities impacts your mental health. And so just to be mindful that we, you know, unfortunately don't get the privilege of being able to just go through one traumatic event at a time. Oftentimes, it's very complex and layered. And so we're dealing with pandemic, but not outside of normal systemic racism that occurs or I don't even know if it's normal, but the racism that occurs and how that impacts everybody and especially our mental health. Having fear of contracting the virus for yourself and family, for community members, all of those things actually are, they impact us as well. And then these shelter in place requirements, that's asking us to maybe not go the places we normally go when we're having a hard time or being able to physically be in the presence of people. All these things are triggers and they are real and you're not alone if you are experiencing some of these symptoms or triggers. So I want to share a little bit about the common, the common symptoms, physical symptoms of depression. It's important to be mindful of these things when we're thinking about how to care for ourselves and how to care for the people that we care about and the people who we love. If we are aware of the symptoms, we can know when we should make adjustments or reach out for help and support. So some of those physical symptoms to be mindful about are if your appetite has changed, a fluctuation in your weight, increase or a rapid decrease, those things that want you to be mindful of. If it's difficult for you to think, you're just moving very slow, slower than you have like normally through your speech, like these things you want to be mindful of. If it's hard for you to feel, if you feel just really numb, those are some physical symptoms, energy reduction, fatigue, sleeping too much or sleeping not enough. Psychological symptoms with depression is definitely a risk for suicide and suicidal ideations. So if that is something that you're experiencing and or you're aware of your friends or families are experiencing, that is something we really want to be mindful of and to reach out for support so that we can help you during that time. There's also thoughts of worklessness, a decreased interest in doing the things that once were very pleasurable for you. And then it's just really hard, maybe it's really hard to be able to focus on school work or take care of studying or making decisions, all those things. These are the most common symptoms, both physical and psychological for depression. So as we talk about it, we're telling you about it just not just to let you know what depression is, but then also to let you know that it's actually very treatable and that with the right being able to reach out and get support and start interventions that mental health recovery is always possible. And so we want to give you or some ideas of things that you can do to manage symptoms of depression. We've shared actually now throughout all the presentations about the importance of being able to move your body to exercise to help just to get your blood flowing to decrease stress in your body to increase endorphins. It's so important to be able to move your body. It also can be helpful, maybe reading, meditation, prayer, all of these things can be helpful. And we think it's still very important still to be able to get out of the house. So that may not mean during this time that you're able to go to the places and be around all the people that you normally would be around. But think about, can I go outside of my house for a walk or a break? Can I, you know, just get out, do something to see if that is helpful. Also things that are helpful during this time is to give yourself the permission to slow down and what that might look like, especially as being students is like if you have the capacity or if your program and your your class schedule allows to take less classes, maybe this is the time to explore that or work with your advisor to figure out what class can I take that won't be as stressful during this particular time. So really giving yourself the grace to take a break as you can. Because we do understand that everybody doesn't have the privilege to just stop going to school. But just seeing, is there a way that I can take care of myself and do the things that I need to do. Another thing is important to stay informed but also manage your news and media outlets. So really be particular about what's helpful for you and what isn't helpful. And sometimes just having facts versus you know, not facts. It's helpful to know like the truth about what's happening, what's going on. It may be able to decrease some anxiety and fears and depression and to use have a routine. So a routine is not, it may not be your normal, your routine that you do that you used to do. Just having the space to try something different to create a new routine for you and sticking to that can be very helpful. And then limit alcohol and drug use if that's, if you're able to do that. Think of ways that you can cope with the depression and or anxiety in ways that will feel your body and help you to feel good. So those are just some of the tips and things that we are, that we like to share with you about how to manage depression. And I'm curious to see what else you have, what's been working for you. Even if you're not able to share that here but just be thinking about what's worked for you in the past, what's working for you now and what adjustments have you had to make to be really intentional about that because you absolutely have the capacity to care for yourself. And we are here to help you when you need support and that might be now and we are definitely available for you. So the last thing kind of want to share or begin to share with you is this discussion around social distancing versus physical distancing. So like in our state, we are being asked to participate in social distancing. This is to keep our body safe, to decrease the spread of the virus. It's extremely important and necessary during this pandemic. As we consider the nature of humans, like just being a human being and the power of language. One thing I would like all of us to, like to encourage all of us to do is to think about this time as not a time of like socially distancing ourselves, but maybe physically distancing. So we're not able to be in that space physically, but we are trying to be creative and really think outside the box on how can we still maintain social connections. They are extremely important and extremely important in regards to depression. One of the major triggers as well as symptoms is this isolation and being alone and feeling alone like no one else is there. So one of the things that's super important is being able to have community and connect with your community. And that may be different from what we're used to. So just to think about what has, have you found to be helpful? Some creative ways. Josh has talked about maybe on TikTok, like I found that I enjoy TikTok, I can't do the dances, but I like to watch them. And some other creative ways maybe FaceTime or Duo if you don't have an iPhone or a video format to still stay connected and have like that face-to-face but virtual face-to-face connections. Letter writing I know that's throwback, but it really can be nice to get a card or a letter in the mail is pretty awesome especially during this time. Maybe texting people calling people maybe go on physical distancing walks or for my husband's birthday this year we did a parade for him because we weren't going anywhere for his birthday, but I was able to have people come by, drive and honk and show signs or carry signs for him and that was just a really good time. So think creatively about ways to still connect with the people who feel you, who just your people your who makes you feel better about who you are and what you're going through so though you don't want to cut off those people from your lives especially during extreme times of crisis. So we're thinking about this time it is a very challenging time for a lot of people and if you are one of those people like I've said several times today you are definitely not alone and so once you to really focus on giving yourself grace and offering grace to others give yourself the grace to not be what you may describe as your best during this time right like not comparing it to non-pandemic times like I was able to do all my assignments in two hours before this happened and now I'm just no good because it's taking me eight hours or it's taking me several days but to give yourself the grace that you deserve in terms of just being human and trying to figure out this new way of life this new season this time right now and then also offering that same level of grace as you have the capacity to do so to other people and to listen to others listen to yourself and then also listen to your friends your family if they need support or an ear someone to talk to but always being mindful of what you have the capacity to do under no circumstance are you required to bear the burdens of others if you don't have the space to do so so if you you know don't have the capacity you can always refer your friends to counseling and even refer yourself there's other places there's doctors nurse practitioners natural paths acupuncturists these are all areas of place and places for healing even faith communities so please just reach out to spaces people things that you find that have been helpful for you in the past and that may be helpful for you during this time so just wanted to end with this definition again around depression right so it's a normal thing we all have sadness we all have trouble at work trouble at home all these things happen to us and and we're not saying you have depression or there's something wrong with you but if feelings and your emotions get in the way of you being able to live the life that you want to live then that is a great time to reach out and we are here to support you so if you have any questions or comments that you would want to share and Gloria is going to join me on the screen and we are available to answer any questions you have Daryln I have one question for you do you have do you have a favorite book or website that you would recommend to students or to anybody who just wants some other ideas website that I recently went on I feel like it was actually I don't know I'll top my head I went on like the CDC they were helpful I don't want to go on websites but the CDC had some pretty good information and the Kaiser Family Foundation they had some good resources to thinking about depression especially during these times with the COVID outbreak okay I just thought maybe students might want to know where to go to get more and if you do want more you can just schedule time with us too because we can sit down and look together and see what we can do and I think that might be a good fit some of the apps that I like to use is there's elevate there's some apps that I could share to give me a moment while we look for other questions I don't see any other questions I don't know if this is working I'm Tom my own video seems to be frozen but here I am ask away I don't know if this is working I don't know if this is working I don't know if this is working I don't know if this is working but here I am ask away I see one question here that was asking about apps and there's a couple that are my favorite there's one that's the calm app and it has different there's also the safe place app there's the liberate invitation app for children there's the mind yeti I'll type all of these in the keyword maybe if another cancer can answer this question there's a question that says depression is treatable what are some of the ways that the counseling office addresses depression one of you can answer that and I'll answer the app question I'll try it so usually when I talk with someone about their depression I really ask them how that shows up in their body I talk with them about their energy level about you know how they're experiencing depression and then also about what's been going on in their life right now so that we can figure out how much of their depression is due to just situational kinds of things or environmental kinds of things that we might be able to tweak a little bit easier also the way that we perceive or look at things impacts how we feel so I try to help people look at different ways to look at a situation or another way to kind of interpret what's happening in front of them and then sometimes I need to refer people for a medication evaluation because their body is just too sluggish if they're not sleeping through the night or they just can't get out of bed in the morning to get to school or work those are times when we might consider checking with their doctor or nurse practitioner or I can give them a referral for that and then we try to work with the physical and the mental and emotional parts together so I think as Daryln stated and some other folks too usually I try to go for things that are low cost and easy first like moving your body or exercise and then kind of looking for pleasurable activities in your life trying to do some quick fixes and then see where we are at that point so it just kind of depends on the person and the situation and what we do it can vary anywhere from a little bit of bibliotherapy reading something to a little bit of meditation to reframing or re-looking at things it just kind of depends so that's how I address depression with people but other people maybe other counselors have some other ways they work with folks who have those symptoms so maybe Tom or Daryln could join in too I agree with all of what you shared one thing I would add is that sometimes people have been through a lot of challenging things in their life and they haven't had the space to just acknowledge it and say you know actually this has been really hurtful and this has been really painful and so as a clinician you'll be able to give you the validation that sometimes people haven't received and they've received and experienced a lot of things that have been really painful and that they haven't let out so it just all stays inside and impacts their mood and their ability to even think about things in a different type of way so that's another component that happens in the life of people who have had a lot of experience in depression I can add and maybe Tom us to jump in everything that you said is brilliant for both of you and what I love about working with students is that we get to find out what works for you and so we're always in partnership we're going to try something talk about it did this work and we're always in partnership but often times a lot of the healing can get to it's just someone you can process and be holding on to things sometimes the way that we talk to ourselves we would never talk to anybody else so it's really thinking like having a moment to think about the ways in which the messages that we give ourselves how we talk to ourselves sometimes that's a first step but again depression it has a lot of different as Daryln mentioned a lot of different causes and it impacts all different parts of our body sometimes we embody that physically emotionally it comes out differently for all of us so that means that the way in which we address it is going to be individual to you I'm not sure what I could possibly add to all of that but I hope my colleagues know exactly what they're doing and they do it very well the short answer though is that it's actually much easier to come in and try it and experience it and see if it works for you than it is to try to get an explanation about how it happens the proof is really in the pudding and I would encourage anyone who is considering it to come on in and have a conversation because it is hopefully painless and hopefully can be very much of a relief and counseling can be a really great tool and it's not nearly as scary as it seems I want to echo that Tom the scariest part is making the appointment it gets easier from there there's another question we have for the panel is basically how do you deal with people a difference of opinion people who maybe are taking more risks around COVID than you are how do you deal with family conflicts relationship conflicts around how we choose to keep ourselves safe and different philosophies and of course I'm guessing politics are a piece of that too yeah I'm just going to read the question and let my beautiful colleagues answer it go ahead I think the first place so I'm going to start and we're all just going to build on this the first place I probably would start with is even where I shared with offering grace that's probably where I would start in my situation I don't know the details around the person who asked the question so again what Nicole said is going to be very specific to your family your experiences and we can talk further about that but for me starting would definitely be from the space of offering grace and understanding that a lot of people everybody is going through this and it's going to be a lot of different things different responses to how they deal with trauma and it can sometimes appear that there is not getting it why aren't you paying attention why aren't you doing the same things that I'm doing to keep myself safe I don't understand where you're coming from but people process and deal with things in different ways we can't really control people to do the things that we want them to do and sometimes that's the hardest thing is to being able to recognize that and recognize what is it actually pulling up in me so if I'm seeing people not wearing their mask or not taking this seriously what anxiety is that raising in me what are the feelings that are associated in that for me because that's what we have access to that's what we have control over and it's not really the way that other people process or don't process different process situations that's where I would start I like that approach and I would add to that I really think of that as how independent and assertive I can be which means I have to think about what am I willing to risk or what's my level of anxiety to begin with and then with the facts that I can read from the CDC from the Department of Health what's the advice I'm being given from experts and decide for myself what I'm willing to do what I'm willing to do and not do and then kind of from there once I decide what I'm willing to do it is about being assertive it is about saying what I need to do for me is this and you can it's okay you're going to do what you're going to do but I need to be making this choice right now for this reason I'm going to say what boundaries are what you're willing to I guess what you're willing to risk and so if a client came to me with that or a student came to me with that issue I'd say well what where is your line and then what words do you want to use to tell your message or say what your boundaries are for them although they're probably going to change it to use their own language at least I can suggest some words they might use or some language and then we kind of go from there but I think that is such a difficult one because everybody has a different comfort level around how close they want to be or how much they want to wear a mask or whatever it is about what Daryln said about giving yourself and other people some grace but not letting people walk all over you if you feel like you need personally a little more space or a little more something so that's kind of how I'd answer that question I can add too I think to both of your points and to Daryln specifically I get hyper vigilant when I'm anxious so I might get really irritable if someone's not wearing a mask around me and then I remember what do I have in my control and what's not so I can back up I can ask for space in the grocery store I can wear a mask I can shop at a time I can shop early in the morning or in a less busy time and I'm also thinking about being a parent and how we always have to catch our kids doing something good so I try to catch good behavior and acknowledge that too I'm trying to spend some time giving a little bit more kindness so when I see our essential workers in the grocery store just thank you for being here I'm trying to wear a mask to give you some space how can we support you and then that tends to be contagious and so other people start to be able to hear that too let me step back a little bit so I'm trying to name the good behavior try to be extra kind that's great I think it's very difficult to give sort of broad general answers to this because the person who asked this question is talking about people who are friends and family and of course the real answer for how to manage a situation like that depends in part on what that relationship is and how it is and how it is managed between the people who are in it and the truth is unfortunately while the person who is asking the question might be seeking to have a real discussion about this without triggering a conflict we don't know anything about the motivation of the other person they may in fact be looking for conflict there's a lot unfortunately in this high stress time in our history right now who are actually spoiling for a fight and so figuring out what is the motivation and the role of the other person in a conflict is actually essential to how this question gets answered and what is the nature of that relationship and how much choice and power do you have in terms of how much you're going to interact with this person if this is a neighbor that you can kind of say see later too that's one thing but if it's someone that you're sharing a household with or a bedroom with that's a much tougher situation to untangle in terms of how you're going to manage yourself and so again I would sort of recommend have this conversation with one of the members of the counseling team conversations because the context and relationships are going to make a huge difference in how this gets entangled and dealt with I have to see another question that's asking can we only ask about depression and anxiety nope this is your chance we may not be able to answer more than that but no you know around mental and emotional health absolutely counseling services yes we might be able to figure out how to navigate the college system of high line sure but yeah no the number for the lottery that we don't know in fact I'm just learning how to use this zoom platform so if you were with me at noon you found that out so lots of grace all around so until we get another question I did want to just ask the the panelists here what's worked for you in dealing with this like any strategies that we can share and then we can get some from our attendants attendees as well I think I'd like to answer that you know what has worked for me is just remembering that it's really typical of people including myself to go for a moment of being really really anxious and kind of depressed about what the outlook is to being more hopeful at times and that even in a day I kind of circle through all of those feelings or all of those different points and when that happens I just remind myself that that's the way it is for most of us we can handle a little bit of you know what's going on and then it becomes a little overwhelming and then we can draw back and feel like oh okay I've got some tools to go forward I can handle this I can manage this and I think we all are doing that in some way shape or form these days so I just try to remind myself when I'm in one of those places that for a very long I can remind myself there's another perspective and it's typical to go back and forth a few times you know that's what I'd add that and I take out the recycling and garbage just so I can get a short walk a lot more than I used to because hey you know it's good to get out of the house and it's good to see a little but I think that's been helpful cups of tea I'd become a really big tea fanatic I was before but now it's probably increased a bit and I've tried to do as Nicole mentioned in one of her previous workshops I've tried to do some creative things like like paint or write a song do you know just do something that requires a little bit of creative energy that helps I have been for one seen my therapist very important now the other thing that I've been doing is I've been trying to get outside like go on walks I do walk like with some like with my husband that makes me feel the safest right now so I'll do that and walk up heels and I'm really practicing right now in giving myself grace to just not feel okay on some days that like Gloria said like there's ups and downs and even though we're on this panel and even though we are like mental health experts we're human and we are experiencing this with you and trying to figure it out too so I've been doing a lot of zoom calls or face timing with my niece, with my brothers all those things have been really helpful really trying to stay connected that's all for me I can add a few things I don't know how you were talking about and Gloria but there are just some days that you have to give yourself grace that aren't great I found that at the beginning Monday through Friday were okay because I had a schedule and it's easy for me to be attentive to other people or to my work so Saturdays used to be my favorite day I ended up being kind of hard a good friend of mine because at 11 o'clock on Saturdays we walk and talk so I have to go for a walk and so does she, that means I have to get up out of bed means I have to have eaten I have to get dressed and get ready and then it's something I look forward to and then just that little bit of endorphins I walk a mile it's not that long I'm in a better mood and I'm ready to be present whereas I think the first Saturday I probably stayed in bed for most of Saturday it just was a day so that's been really helpful for me the other pieces I have a hammock and I have a rocking chair and both of those things when we're feeling dysregulated think about when you're a baby and you're rocked by your mom or even when you're stressed do you find yourself kind of rocking to just kind of self suit so I'm literally rocking myself so at night I go in my hammock I look at the stars I put a blanket up and rock and that helps me to get to a place where I can sleep so that's been really helpful and also most therapists have therapists shout out to our therapists you know walking creates that same rocking sensation too so if you don't have a hammock or something just moving your body like that can create that same soothing sensation now we're all doing it and it's catchy right that's right it's a point of row walking I've been it's my normal coping strategy too not just for covid times but I rock by playing music and anyone can do it even if you're not an instrumental person you can sing and any amount of creative stuff as Gloria was referencing is it's just good medicine we all have access to it in our own capacity I've been walking too I'm an introverted person it's kind of a weird time I see people posting on the internet introverts we were built for this it's not necessarily true I miss people with my family I have a wife and kids and I love being around them and sometimes I wish I had some more time alone because nobody's leaving the house so all that stuff is true we've been really good about having dinner together just having one good meal a day with everyone sitting around the table and it's been that has been very good for my stress and I think for everybody else's too so you do what you can with what you have I want to add another thing that I just remembered and I think it was from what Josh said when he was on earlier about everybody getting a gift from Oprah sometimes I find that it's really helpful to me and my mental health when I can figure out something nice to do for somebody else and something really little even like sending people a postcard or a letter or like Nicole was just showing you what you can do for somebody else or just buying somebody some flowers or picking some flowers if you have some at home or where you live and giving them to someone who isn't expecting it but those little acts of kindness or thinking about what little act of kindness I could give somebody else something like that and it puts them in a good mood and then the gift you've given to yourself as well is that you can feel good about what you've shared and that helps too so giving gifts and getting gifts or little kindnesses back and forth I think that's what creates community and it's a hard time gifts don't have to cost money they can be an email they can be something you have that you share like if you have some tea or you have an idea for a book or something on TV they can watch it can be anything you share with somebody that can just put them in a good place that they're being thought of know that they matter to you and that you care about them I'd just say that that's something to think about too I've also been inspired by my kid she's 10 she's been having virtual sleepovers with her best friend they watch a movie together they will cook together they're in their sleeping bags on the couch and wake up in the morning and connect some of the simplest things are from our kids our kids teach us looking to kids for inspiration if they can still laugh I think that's been really powerful one other thing that has been helpful for me there was a question given to Josh how do you not be a workaholic especially when your work is in your home it's really hard to turn it off I am guilty of that myself one thing I've been doing is just a little routine of just walking out my door even if it's raining my day is done I'm coming back home now wherever you are stepping outside and going back in it sounds really silly but it can give you that break to know I'm done the work will be there I'll get there in the morning I'm coming back home I'm coming back home I was not having that time to transition so usually I'm at home at work and I'm driving home at least an hour in traffic although I do not miss traffic I do miss that quiet time to be able to be with my thoughts creating transitions from one activity to the other that's a really great idea I'm going to ask one more question what's your go to jam what's your song that if you're feeling blue or feeling really irritated at the person not wearing a mask or whatever it is what's a song that transitions you emotionally or kind of music I think of a different song you know I think that during this time I really haven't been listening to music at all because for me right now it doesn't feel helpful it feels too chaotic and adds to the noise everywhere it feels like things being more quiet for me that's what's helpful right now and when I get in the car to go to the grocery store it's such a short trip there's not really time for music so I guess I don't have that answer right now for me it's just I think I'm enjoying some parts of the pandemic and that things are slower so there's some quiet when I need it to be quiet I can't hear the traffic anymore where I live that feels really nice to me for right now there are some things that have come out of it I wasn't expecting I think right now I've been listening to I love what you said around the quiet the birds which I feel a bit louder than ever I'm super excited that we're not around as much but I'm more present to that but I also I love N-D-I-R-E so anything that that is like a soothing just touches me in a certain way you know my dad's Jamaican grew up in Kingston born the same year as Bob Marley so we had Bob Marley playing a lot as a kid and I was like that's the kind of thing because every little thing is going to be alright that is the song that instantly puts me into like okay then I get on my little hammock you know it's a good time also my family knows when that song is playing that they give me lots of space Darlene you got a song well you know I don't necessarily I don't think I have a song I would like to share because N-W-I-G-E I love all his stuff and it is amazing like I would say like N-D-I-R-E will just a little bit more probably rap kind of like hip-hop he's really good I love him the song that I really am enjoying right now is called Hella Black and that gives me a little bit of music so people are putting in on the chat all kind of recommendations of things that they're doing that works for them as well as songs because that's what I was going to ask next so I'm super glad that we're doing that can we also put that in the Q&A so I'm going to read what people have added so far so we've got a living history right now also it just helps to get our thoughts out helps to reflect and think and manage thoughts and feelings yes exactly I love this Frankie don't stop until you get enough yes Sympathique by Pink Martini I know that I'm not saying that right but forgive me this is the best okay go to This Shall Pass so it sounds like a gospel song that does sound good and then let's see I'm going to do what is coming suggested and get outside thanks everyone a depressing French song that sounds super upbeat doesn't that sound like life right now you know what I mean I'm kind of sad but we're just like put a little upbeat yeah that's kind of life right now I'd love to hear more keep keep them coming what's working for you give them in the Q&A and then while you're coming up with things we're waiting for our participants to give their input Gloria you had a point about there's some unusual positives that have happened I would say COVID is great by no means but are there moments of surprise or moments of opportunity that you've had or experienced while having to stay at home well I have actually I have a couple things more I can add I think the silence thing has been really that's been just helpful for me realizing that I need maybe a little more silence than what I thought even though I'm an extrovert I think as you age sometimes you kind of develop that other side of yourself and I'm really becoming more introverted in some ways I like a little more reflection time and sometimes I need to be away from people for a time so I think I've been more in tune with how I'm changing in some ways lately and then I've been it always is helpful for me to remember that the thing that usually gets me through lots of things in life is humor and trying once I get over the shock and the you know like oh my gosh the anxiety then I move to really if I can find some humor in this I've been looking at the cartoons in the New Yorker that are online that you can find I found something on Facebook for a friend of mine she's really into Tolkien and so there's there was this image of the black and white image of the what do I say people going on fellowship during the Lord of the Rings and so in the the signage underneath it said that Middle Earth is temporarily banning fellowships of more than five and so and they had all these people all four of them lined up with their swords and so all you could see was the silhouettes thing and so I just painted it for my friend who's a Tolkien fanatic and I sent it to her in the mail because I thought it was hysterically funny and she of course when she got it thought it was hysterically funny too so I've just been doing kind of little things like that like looking for where there's humor in the midst of the sadness and the sadness of the both just like all the rest of life is right it's got moments of real joy and moments of connection with others and shared kind of experience and and it's got you know periods of sadness and periods of you know sometimes when I can find some humor that just helps it helps there's other ways I can release the tension and move forward because really we don't really have a choice we have to kind of figure out how to get through this through various means and just get to the other side somehow so I think that I think I like to do creative stuff but looking for humor in things every once in a while helps me if you were to look at my Netflix feed right now it would just be comedies because I just can't do anything serious or just rom-coms like just lifetime movie kind of things I think it's also I found interesting is to get to know my family better because you know they're at work or school all day and it's interesting to find out like oh they have like a school voice you know like interesting you know or watching you know little moments where my husband might be in a video call being very serious you know and the cat comes across you know he's trying to make a point and the dogs all you know and actually it's been fun to watch people's humanity people's like we get a window into people's lives I mean we get to do that as therapists all the time but even with our colleagues we get a little window into who they are but also people around us so you know therapists we love to know it you know so we get a little bit more of it I think it's helped me develop a little bit more empathy for like for my husband and the work that he does because I always feel like he hasn't worked like I have you know being able to work together and share that space and really trying to figure things out it's been an interesting journey not bad at all it's different how many pleasant surprises from the last 10 weeks or so the other thing I've noticed is to how I'm eating differently because I don't want to shop as much so you know just choosing to eat a little differently with you know more veggies coming into the house a little less cookies and trying to really just kind of minimize the trips to the grocery store mostly and be more thoughtful about what we're going to get because before I was just like you know just doing whatever I felt like going to the grocery store more than twice a week usually and now I we're not doing that we're being more simplistic about things and and I like it better and I'm started thinking like oh my gosh when we transition out of this how am I going to keep some of my good habits with me when we go back you know to being you know in the physical office you know at the college you know I I'm hoping that I can make that transition easier for myself but I will like as Daryln said I will like that ride to and from work because it really helps me do the same thing kind of sort stuff out get ready for the day so I can be brief at the end of the day so you know when I get home I can just do home stuff and now it's it's a little harder for that those boundaries I can't say I'm eating better but I am learning to cook more so you know we bought this huge bag of flour that I thought there's no way we'll be able to get through and those loaves and all kind of stuff but even that is you know there's a simpler kind of quieter pace of life that I am enjoying and then we'll have to think about what that transition looks like when we go back but I think collectively at least for me I need that slowing down so someone wrote in that they're sewing masks because it feels like they're less helpless and they can do something to help. And plus it's a great creative outlet too for. Yes, Robin, that was an awesome idea. You get to be creative, but also feel like you have a sense of purpose and that kindness. Because I know that there's somebody in my neighborhood who was making masks and I don't know how to sew. So that was like, that was a huge gift for me. So thank you for doing that. It literally is life saving. I'm fine, I'm sure. That's awesome. I too cannot sew, but my mom has been making masks. So I know we've been at this for a while since about noon. We're gonna stay with you for a little bit longer. We might go a little quiet, but please if there's any questions or things that you're thinking about, we're here for you or any ideas that you'd like to share with the community of things that have worked for you. We'd love to hear that too. Also, if you have any suggestions for us, for ways that we can be more available to you or in different ways, we would love to hear that too. We're thinking of you. So we're just gonna give some space for some Q and A's right now. We might go a little quiet, but we're here. Any words of wisdom, Gloria? I'm just thinking. If there's anything more that I have inside me to share. I think that's pretty much my contribution at this point. It's funny as therapists, we spend a lot of time listening. So for us to be on stage or presenting or speaking for long periods of time is pushing us out of our comfort zone. I know I've learned a lot from this process. So thanks for your patience with us. Yeah, I'm glad that we did this just because it's nice to do something all together with all of us and work together this way, even though it's a really unfamiliar technology for me. And like you said, it's kind of our first endeavors in this area, but the good thing about it is maybe that's another good thing about the pandemic because it's made me become a little bit more tech functional. Or at least now I can articulate the questions I have about my technology a little better. So I'm more apt to get a good answer from Vince or someone else about what I need to do or what I can do. So that part's good. And I was thinking that even when we go back to the office, now that we can all do things on Zoom, maybe we'll have some Zoom things that we can offer to students. Because if we can do a little webinar once a week or something like that, it's doable to do that. Or maybe a Zoom with a few people, that's easy to do now. So I just think that I didn't have that knowledge before this all started. So now I do and that's kind of a cool thing just to have learned something new. It makes life less boring when you can do something different or we're just acquiring a new skill or a new piece of technology. Yeah, I wouldn't say I'm fully tech savvy, but maybe more tech aware kind of a step getting there. So yeah, you're muted there, Lynn. All I said was, I know this is struggle. It's real, it's real. I also wanted to add about that too. I know some people are kind of turning off their video and that especially just as a way to cope and I think that's okay. I know some instructors have different policies around that, especially around maybe taking exams, having to see you, but communicate with your faculty. And I think there are moments where Zoom does drain you. So we have to take breaks from that, maybe turn the screen off for a little bit and still stay engaged. But yeah, that's important. It's a whole different level of being present and being on and having to be present, to be on, to be aware, looking at yourself. It's a whole another level of like stress, of being in Zoom in that way. So that's not something I would have known prior to this experience because I didn't really spend that much time in like a professional setting on video like this. Face time, sure, with my friends, but not in this capacity. So before we close for the day, counselors, maybe then Saisha, if you're still on, any closing thoughts for our community? I'd like to share that. I really do, I'll know all of us, really do just appreciate your willingness to trust us with some of the, like with your life, with your story, with your experiences and when it continued to be here. And even as we share our, I think even as I share my own experiences, I recognize like the privilege that I have to be able to work from home and that I still have my job and that I do have a supported safe environment that I'm living in, right? And so we acknowledge that that's not the reality for everybody and to the best of our ability, we wanna be there to be able to support you and to help you and you may not at this time be able to see what's a positive experience or something coming positive out of this. And so just wanted to name that and also just reiterate that we are available and we are here to be supported in your journey. Amen. And I would say too that if you have the means to connect with us through the counseling center by phone or Zoom, this is a time when a lot of folks have time on their hands than they have typically. And I would say just give it a shot. There's no cost. In fact, if you're a student, you are paying for this, including the individual and so it is a very valuable resource and if you've got time on your hands right now, I think there is no better time to go ahead and give it a try. It's a tremendous resource. Vince, I know that you're the one who takes in those phone calls often and you may be the first face that people see. Could you just let us know what that is typically like? So if I give you a call and say, you know what, I'd love to see a counselor. What happens after that? The question, we basically help them set up the appointment. I also ask a few, I'll ask some detailed questions to make sure that number one, it is a counselor you need to meet with. And sometimes it might be someone in advising or someone in admissions or someone in financial aid and either way, get you to those services properly, right? But if it is a counselor that you wanna meet with, from there, I'll go over the appointment setting process. It's basically getting information, setting up the nearest available appointment possible to natural calendar. And then from there, I'll talk about the documents that I'll be sending over to you by email. I'll also remind you that the sessions are gonna be a Zoom or it can be over the phone if you prefer. They're confidential. And I like to say my trademark at the offices, you know, we hold your records like a doctor's office. So even if the president of the campus, Dr. Moseby wanted to know about you, I could not acknowledge it, you exist. You can't even talk about it and we're walking the commission. That's what normally happens. Thanks, Ben. Oh, you're welcome. Okay. Thank you everyone for joining. We're ending a little early, but I can see our participants are kind of starting to dwindle and we've been with you for two and a half hours. So thank you to our interpreters. Thank you for our IT folks, our captioners. Thank you so much for what you do. Hang in there, we're here for you. Okay.