 I'm the comic weekly man, the jolly comic weekly man. And I'm here to read the bunnies to you happy boys and honeys. Yes, boys and girls, it's comic weekly time. And here I come right into your house to bring you a little fun and happiness. Right out of the pages have popped the comic weekly straight into your living room. Your friend, the comic weekly man, the jolly comic weekly man. Well, little Miss Honey, how are you today? I know a riddle for you. Quite fine, thank you. What is the riddle? If a boy wears his pants out, what will he do? Ask his father for money to buy a new pair. No. Get a job delivering newspapers so he can make enough money to buy a new pair. No. Oh, all right. I give up. If a boy wears his pants out, what will he do? Wear his pants out. Oh, that's a good one. Of course, if he wears his pants out of the house, he'll wear them back. Get him a house again. Yes, honey, so I'll save it for next week. Oh, fine. So now could we please read the funny? Pop the comic weekly? Yes. Very well. I'll read that in just a moment. But before I do, let's listen to this nice man. Now, here we go with Pop the Comic Weekly. And on the first page, under bringing up Father Beatle Bailey. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Toot me a toot and tweak me a tweedle. Squeeze out music for Bailey the Beatle. Out at the army camp where Beatle is stationed, Beatle and his friend Bami are helping in the kitchen. Beatle sees the cook hand the pan full of meat and vegetable scraps to Bami. All right, here, Bami. Put these bones and scraps in that pot where I'm saving the soup stock. Not a captain order you to economize again, huh? Beatle watches as Bami walks over to a big cauldron standing on the table and dumps the scraps into it. The cook roars. All right, hurry and get the floor swept, Beatle. Beatle starts to sweep up the floor, which is covered with tin cans, cigar butts, and a lot of other scraps. There's only one thing that keeps me from punching him in the nose. It's that he'd punch me back. Last picture top row, Beatle sweeps the stuff into a dustpan and then walks over to the big cauldron that Bami had dumped the meat scraps into. I'll save myself a trip outside and dump this where Bami emptied the garbage. The first picture bottom row, the cook comes back into the kitchen. Beatle points to the floor and says, Now that's what I call a clean floor. Yeah, it'll have to do. Now go on out and peel some spuds for supper while I cook lunch. That noon, the officers line up for lunch. The captain is at the head of the line. He says, Well, what's in the soup you got for lunch, Cookie? Oh, just about everything, Captain. Third picture bottom row, Cookie lifts the cauldron off the stove. Yeah, it's a real challenge to my cooking ability to make a good meal out of what I can scrape up. And then Cookie dips out a ladle full of soup and empties it into the captain's soup bowl. An outcome, tin cans, cigar butts, broken plates, a pair of old rubbers, and the captain roars. Cookie, I think you carried this economy business too far. Please, Cookie, stop it. Please, Cookie, stop it. The last picture, the cook has set the cauldron back on the stove and has shoved Beetle into the kettle. And as Beetle struggles to get out, the cook roars. You want to serve your country? Yeah, of course I want to serve my country, but fine, we'll serve you for lunch. Oh, that was some joke on the cook. Yes, Beetle thought that all of the scraps were going to be thrown out. Yes, and all the time the cook was saving him to make soup. Well, Beetle certainly got himself into trouble that time dumping the stuff he swept off the floor into the soup stock. Yes, that Beetle, he's some character. Well, now I'll bet you'd like to know what's happening to the princes in The Sword and the Road. Oh, yes, please. All right, then let's turn over the page and go past Little Iodine and Prince Val, turn over page three, and there on page five is Walt Disney's The Sword and the Road. Do you remember Henry was king? Yes, and Henry's sister, the Princess Mary, has fallen in love with a captain of the guards named Charles Brandon. And they tried to escape from England so that they could get married, because, you see, they had to because King Henry wanted the princess to marry the king of France. Yes, but last week they were put off the ship they tried to sail away on, and they've been sent back to shore. And there stand the king's men waiting for them. I wonder what'll happen to them now? Do you think the king will punish Charles Brandon? We'll find out right away. Here we go with The Sword and the Road. It's merry, merry England when nighthood was in flower, music to bewitch our story hour. The boat from the ship pulls up to the king, and Mary and Charles Brandon step ashore from the long boat. The captain of the king's lancers steps forward. Charles Brandon, I'm charged to convey you to the Tower of London, arrested at the king's name for high treason. Your highness will be escorted to the Royal Palace at Greenwich, where your brother, the king, awaits you. Last picture top row Charles is seized by two of the lancers. Mary tells Charles not to despair that she will never marry anyone but him. Next morning at Greenwich Palace, first picture far and roll, the king is at breakfast. His chancellor is reading from a document. And since the abduction of the princess is an active high treason, I have drawn up a warrant for the execution of Charles Brandon. Oh, that's straight up! The king seizes the document and signs his name to the death warrant. Causing trouble between England and France, and dangering the marriage between the king's sister and Louis. There. And then he returns to breakfast. Oh, may lord general, you propose to stretch Brandon's neck or to shorten him. Just then, princess Mary enters the room last picture and is horrified to hear the chancellor saying, oh, my lord, a prisoner of such consequence deserves the dignity of the ceremonial ex. Oh, Charles Brandon. Yes, they're going to execute him and the king is going to have him killed to make certain that the princess won't marry him. You said she'll marry the king of France then? I think that's the king's scheme. Well, we'll help him, Charles Brandon, never be saved. Now, maybe we'll find out about that next week. But now let's turn over the page and see who's there. You bet he is. He and his companions have been exploring the planet Titan. And they were pursued by a terrific giant. But they escaped from the giant and ran into the rocket ship and found that all of their weapons were gone. All except some huge handcuffs. Big enough for a giant. And that gave Flash an idea. I wonder what the idea is. I don't see how Flash could ever capture a great big giant like that. Well, let's read and see what Flash's plan is. Here we go with Flash Gordon. Flash and Dale are making their way through the brush. Flash carrying the huge handcuffs on his shoulders. Dale wonders how he can expect to handcuff a giant ten feet high. Flash replies, I don't quite know myself, Dale. Hey, that old tree over there, that might be your answer. Second picture, Flash climbs the tree. Hey, this tree is hollowed right down to the base. Good. Last picture, top row. Flash fastens one of the handcuffs around a huge branch. And then he lets the other end drop down into the hollow tree. Now to set the trap. See, the open handcuff dangles down inside the tree trunk. First picture, bottom row, Flash scrambles down. Then he takes a long pole and begins to scratch an opening in the side of the tree that leads into the hollow trunk. See, here's my plan, Dale. The object is to snare the giant's wrist on the handcuff. First, I enlarge this opening at the base of the trunk enough for my body to pass through. And when the giant sees me, he laughs at me. Flash tosses the stick aside. He climbs in through the hole in the side of the hollow tree. Then I slip through the hole and scramble up inside the trunk. The giant reaches his arm in after me and I snap the cuff around his wrist. Suddenly the giant's head appears in the bushes. The giant starts to approach the tree. Flash picture, Flash shouts, Hey, run, honey. I'm coming down. I'll hold him off. Dale answers, no Flash, stay there. I can get through the hole in the trunk. Yes, the giant doesn't see the handcuff dangling down inside the hollow tree trunk. And Flash wants the giant to stick his hand through the hole in the hollow tree. And when he reaches inside to feel around for Flash, he expects to fasten the handcuff to his wrist. And then the giant will be caught. Yes, and it might work if Dale gets through the hole in the trunk fast enough. Oh, I wonder if she will. Well, I'm afraid we'll have to wait until next week to find that out. Now, look across the page. There's Roy Rogers. Oh, yes, and he remember Roy and Wildwood were taking the outlaws that had escaped to the sheriff when they heard somebody calling. And Roy looked around and saw somebody galloping toward him and shouting for help. And that means a new adventure, I'm sure. Well, let's read now and find out what develops. Here we go with Roy Rogers, King of the Cowboys. Hi, yippie-yoh. Now, here we go with Roy and Trigger. Hi, yippie-yoh. Roy sees a young boy galloping toward him. Hey, Senior Roy, two men, they chased me. They say I ride a dead man's saddle. Why, it's my little friend, Chili. Hey, Wildwood, you take a prisoner to the sheriff. I'll be along later. That's what rides off with the two outlaws. Roy helps Chili out of the saddle. All right, now, Chili, you tell me all about it. Well, I find this saddle in a dead horse down in Stone Canyon. No one is your out, so I take it. But then, Senior Roy, two homerys, they chased me. They say I steal it from a dead man. But this is not true. That may be them now, Chili. You let me handle this. Last picture top row, two horsemen ride up and rain in before Roy. One starts to dismount. Roy says, hey, you just got some explaining to do. You're the ones that have been chasing this boy. Now, take it easy, stranger. Eight Preston who ran the newspaper and Birch Creek with dry ghost on top of Stone Canyon. This boy's got his saddle. First picture bottom row, one of the men walks up to Chili. He makes a grab for him. I'll teach you to steal saddle, kid. Hey, you only have boy alone. Roy makes a leap and twists the man's arm to harm you. Hey, what's that? The other man who was obvious to the leader of the two says, after you're a blundering fool, you scared the boy away. I only wanted to ask him some questions. I'm sorry, boss. All right, let go of my arm, cowboy. Roy turns around to see that the boy's leaped into the saddle and has ridden off. He runs for trigger saying, I'll catch Chili and see that the saddle's returned. You can find us in Birch Creek. Last picture, the leader of the two gets in the saddle. All right, come on, Gaffer. We've got to get that saddle somehow. It's worth a fortune to me. But Gaffer has snatched the rifle out of the saddle's scabbard and is aiming at the boy. There's only one way to stop that kid, boss. My way. And to pick on that little boy like that. Yes, it is, because it's obvious that these men must be crooks. Yes, because, look, that man named Gaffer is aiming right straight at Chili and is planning to shoot him dead. I hope he doesn't. So do I. Well, maybe Roy'll find a way to stop that. We'll find out next week. Now let's turn over the page. And here on the very last page of the first section is Dick's adventure. Oh, and I'm anxious to read that because Dick is searching for gold. Well, we'll read that in just a moment, but first here's that nice man again with something interesting to say. Now here we go again with Puck the Comic Weekly and on the last page of the first section, Dick's adventure. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Say them with me, please. Rickety-pack-a-zack-a-dick. Let's have music for adventurous Dick. Dick is in the early days of America in California. Gold has been discovered not far from the town where Dick was living with his friend editor Campbell, publisher of a newspaper. Dick has convinced Campbell that he should join all the others who have gone seeking for gold. They had tried to save the life of a bargeman whose boat was wrecked in the river. When the lives of all three of them were endangered, they were saved by Indians. Campbell had ordered the bargeman to give the Indians the $1,000 reward he had promised anybody for saving his life. But instead of the reward, the bargeman began to fight Campbell. An angry man stopped the fight, made the bargeman pay the Indians $1,000, and had ordered Dick and Campbell off his property. I'm John Augustus Sutter. I want no gold hunters here. Well, we're not looking for gold, Mr. Sutter. We're looking for story. Sutter smiles grimly. Well, I'm the only one who knows this gold rush story. There's on my land that this whole thing started. Oh, golly, golly, would you tell us, Mr. Sutter? Last picture, top row, Sutter sits down on a stump and begins to tell them the story. I owned thousands of acres here. I had farms, stores, ships, shops. I was building this territory into something big. One day, the 19th of January, 1848, James Marshall, the builder of my new sawmill at Kelowna, made a fantastic discovery. First picture, second row, Dick sees the story in his mind's eye, as Sutter tells it. Examining the gravel in the unfinished mill race, he found some shining flakes. Late at night, in great secrecy, Marshall brought a pouch of the metal to me. We waited. Rand tested it with nitric acid. To my astonishment, it was gold. First picture, bottom row, Dick sees in his mind's eye, the two men talking in the dark. I knew what would happen if the secret leaked out. No one would bother to work. Marshall and I swore silence. Last picture, Sutter goes on. But in spite of everything, the secret did leak out. Come, let me show you what's happening to my land. Dick got Mr. Sutter to talk to them? Yes, it was. And now Sutter is no longer angry at them. Well, I think it's good that they've made friends with the man who discovered the gold. If you bet it is. It's too bad, though, that his secret leaked out, isn't it? Yes, it is, because so many people left all the work they'd been doing, and that's exactly what Mr. Sutter didn't want them to do. Yes, he was a good man. Yes, I wonder what will happen next in the story. Well, we'll find that out next week. But now look underneath Dick's adventures. There's Rusty Riley. Oh, yes, and I'm anxious to see what's happening next because you remember Rusty and Tex had been tricked off the main highway by a couple of old crooks who didn't want Tex to bring Silver Lad, that wonderful racehorse, to milestone farm. And last week, Tex discovered that the two men were working for Velvet Cain. And Tex told them he was going to try to get back on the highway, and that they better not try to stop him. And you remember the sheriff had learned about the road sign being changed and had come to investigate, and he thought Mike was going to blow up the bridge that Tex would have to cross. I wonder what he will do about that. Well, let's read now and find out. Here we go with Rusty Riley. Gallop and run till the road is dusty. Give us music for his horse and Rusty. The sheriff looks at the fuse tied to the dynamite. Well, blowing up bridges is a new wrinkling hijacking if that's what's going on here. I'll just disconnect this wire. In the truck, Tex and Rusty, a half hour later, are approaching the bridge. Suddenly Rusty exclaims, Hey, Jeepers, Tex, there's two or three more men. Yeah, and they're packing guns. Well, I ain't taking no chance with them. Tex stops the truck and gets out last picture-top row. So you're in this gang, too, eh? Well, with Kane certainly made sure we wouldn't make it to Lexington. Hey, we ain't in any gang, mister. We're sheriff's deputies. We were told to stop anybody who came along here. And the sheriff approaches first picture-bottom row. Oh, here's the sheriff now. He'll take over. Hey, who are you, mister? What you doing back here? Tex answers. My name's Purdy. I'm trainer for Milestone Farm. We were tricked down to this road by a phony detour sign. There are two men, sheriff. One's up at that cabin, about 200 yards back. Yeah, well, I got the other one. He was going to blow up the bridge. And he's handcuffed now to an 18th sapling. Oh, look, sheriff, this is Rusty Riley. And here's my identification. There's a horse in that van that's got to be in Lexington tomorrow. These owl hoots pulled his stunt to stop us. Can't you just let us go? Yes, please, sir. It means a terrible lot to Mr. Miles. The sheriff examines Tex's identification. They're nods. Milestone Farm, eh? Well, okay, go ahead. But I want you to testify later. Next morning, as dawn brightens the sky, last picture, Tex and Rusty are nearing Milestone Farm in their truck, which carries Silverland, the horse that means so much to Mr. Miles. Well, Rusty, just over those hills and we'll be home. Boy, that word home sounds good. I'll sure be glad to see Mr. Miles and Patty, too. And he's believed Tex's story and was kind enough to let him go with Silverland. And now they'll get Silverland to the horse show in time for Mr. Miles to prove to Senor... Yes, that's right. That's Mr. Yes, Senor Miles has much better resources than Silver King. And that means that Senor Caldera's will buy his horses for Mr. Miles. And that'll save Mr. Miles' farm, won't it? Yes. Well, maybe we'll find out about this for sure next week. Now it's time to pick up the second section of the comic weekly. And here we go right now on the first page of the second section with Dagwin and Blondie. Ramaphore, Ramapham, Zim Zim Zambi, conjugal music for Dagwin and Blondie. The paper hanger is at the Bumsted House. Dagwin comes home to work. And Blondie says, second picture... Dagwin, will you meet us at the market in half an hour to help us carry home the groceries? I'll be there. And Dagwin goes into the living room. Last picture, top row. He sees the paper hanger working. Hmm, how interesting. The paper hanger looks at Dagwin disgustedly and mutters, Uh-oh, the husband. First picture, second row, Dagwin dips his finger into the paste bucket. Hmm, isn't your paste too thick? No. I've been mixing it for 30 years, and it's just right. Dagwin picks up the paste brush and starts to put some glue on a strip of paper. Hey, you mind if I paste up one row? Seems like so much fun. The paper hanger doesn't say a thing. Just turns his back on Dagwin and disgusts. Dagwin, holding the paper, covered with glue in his hands, walks over to the wall. Last picture, second row. I've got a few wrinkles in it, but I guess you can straighten that out. Watch out, you're stepping in my paste. Half hour later, first picture, third row, at the market, Blondie and Cookie and Daisy the dog. Surrounded by piles of groceries are waiting for Dagwin. Now, why doesn't Daddy show up and help us home with these groceries? Back at the house in the living room, Dagwin has gotten his sheet of paper tangled in the painter's. Hey, your piece is stuck tomorrow. He turns around. The paper gets wound around his shoulders. The paper hanger yells, Stand still. You stand still. You're getting me all tangled up. And Dagwin turns around again, getting things into worse condition. The paper hanger gets furious and socks Dagwin. And, of course, Dagwin hits the painter. And here we go, big fight. That'll teach you. What do you mean, teach me? First picture, bottom row, Blondie, Cookie and Daisy the dog are on their way home carrying the groceries. He believes me. If Dagwin hasn't a good excuse for not showing up, he's going to hear from me. As they come up the steps, the door opens. And out comes the paper hanger. Have you finished already? Finished nothing. I quit. Last picture, Blondie goes in the house. She sees a big lump covered with wallpaper stuck against the wall. And two feet are sticking out near the floor. Cookie says, Is it anybody we know, Mama? I'm afraid it is. Dagwin glued to the wall and covered by wallpaper. That paper hanger certainly picked him for budding in. Yes, in the room in. Well, I'm sure that Dagwin will learn not to interfere anymore. Yes, that should teach him a lesson. Well, now I'm sure you'd like to see what's happening to Donald Duck. Oh, yes, please. Alright, let's turn over the page and go past the lone ranger. Turn over page three. And here on page four, the second section is Donald Duckle. Say the magic words with me. Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze. Let's set music to fettet. Daisy, Donald's girlfriend friend has stopped by Donald's house. Oh, hiya, Daisy. You're just in time to make with advice. Oh, you want suggestions, hmm? Yeah. Yeah, we're doing the real house cleaning. I'm scrubbing the floor, Louis washing window, Louis in charge of dust, and Louis does dishes. So Daisy walks to the house, she says. Take down all the curtains and wash them. Spray closets from off. Last picture top row, she looks at the stairs and says. And take that stair carpet up and send it to the cleaners. Oh, no. Send it to the cleaners. First picture bottom row, Donald says. Oh, Daisy, it's not really dirty. Yes, dusty. A vacuum will send it to the cleaners. That's a must. Some time later that afternoon, Daisy is weeding her flower garden. She hears a voice. Hiya, Daisy. Well, we're almost done. She looks up and sees Donald's head over the top of the fence. Oh, how about the stair carpet? Oh, Vance. We're taking it down there now. Daisy stands up and sees Donald and his nephews carrying the carpet, which is so stiff with dirt, that it is still in the shape of the stairs. Yep, the cleaner said he couldn't get the carpet in his truck without breaking it. Pick it up. It still looks like stairs. We just heard about it now. Oh, that doff key. Yes, you bet. Well, now that's all the time I have. But before I go, here's that nice fellow with some more interesting information. Well, honey, and all you boys and girls, I gotta go now. All right, Mr. E. Okay, that's a date, and a date with all you boys and girls. Be sure to meet me with our little friend Miss Honey next week, when I read Puck the Comic Weekly. For I'm the Comic Weekly Man, the jolly Comic Weekly Man. I'll be back to read the funnies to you happy boys and honeys. Don't forget, boys and girls, see you all next week. Your friend, the Comic Weekly Man, the jolly Comic Weekly Man.