 The narcissist is jealous of you. They feel an envious resentment of you and your achievements, possessions and perceived advantages. They feel a resentful suspicion that you are attracted to or involved with someone else. They are fiercely protective of you because they see you as their possession. They see you as something that belongs to them which is why they are constantly chasing after you because they feel like someone or something is taking you away from them. The narcissist wants to control you. They want to control your perception, how you see yourself other people and the world around you so that they can isolate you and keep you all to themselves because no amount of your time, energy or money is enough for the narcissist. They will always need more from you while making you believe that whatever you give to them isn't good enough. They need so much from you because they have nothing to give to themselves. They expect you to be satisfied with their company even though they don't want to be alone with themselves. Even though the narcissist may minimize what you give to them, they will be very controlling over you. They will maintain influence and authority of your time, energy and money because secretly they are aware of your value but they don't want you to know that because if you realized all this value you were given to them you would be looking at how they're not bringing anything to the table. It's just you giving everything you have to them while you're not getting anything back in return. And they're the ones who are constantly complaining about you. It's reverse psychology. It's the practice of subtly encouraging a behavior or belief by advocating its opposite. They make you believe that you aren't good enough so that you try to do more when you're already doing too much. In any relationship there needs to be a balance. There needs to be a balance of the time, energy and money you give to yourself and to your relationship partner. But if you're dealing with a narcissist you will look back and find that while they're constantly complaining about you you will find that you've given more to them than you've given to yourself. And yet they are still demanding more and more from you. The truth is, even if you were a billionaire, even if you spent every second of the day with them, it still wouldn't be enough because the problem isn't with you or anyone else outside of the narcissist. The problem is that they are holding you responsible for them. They're not taking responsibility for their own lives which is a typical thing that narcissists will do. They will hold you responsible for where they are in life. They will expect you to do more. They will always expect more from you than they expect from themselves. While a healthy functional person will always expect more from themselves than they expect from anyone else. But when you take time to yourself they see it as though you're being selfish. When in actuality that is one of the most selfless things you can do. Because rather than depending on them you are given yourself the fuel that you need. It is a selfish act to make demands and expect someone to give you all of their time. If you constantly need something from someone that is being selfish because you're only thinking about yourself. But narcissists see it as though you're being selfish when you take time to yourself. Because in their minds you have all of the power. You have all of the energy and money. Which is why they talk to you in the first place. Because they wanted a partake in everything that you have to offer. And whenever you spend time to yourself they feel like you're taking it away from them. Because in their minds it's already theirs. They see you as their possession. They feel entitled to your time, energy and money. So any time that you try to withdraw will reserve anything for yourself. They see it as though you're being selfish. They don't self reflect and see that's what they're doing by being so demanding and controlling. The narcissists jealous of you. Because they feel an envious resentment of your achievements, possessions and perceived advantages. They always feel like someone or something is taking it away from them. They are constantly focusing on you. Rather than investing that time and energy into their own lives. Because they believe that investing it into you is a better payoff. If they really believe that they will be better off by being alone to themselves and investing that time and energy into their own lives. They would probably be doing that. You wouldn't see them as often. And they wouldn't be demanding much from you. But they don't do that. Because they know that being around you is better for them. Even if they do constantly complain to you and claim that you're not good enough. They are secretly taking advantage of you. Because a person is not going to remain in a situation unless they're getting something out of it. They're not going to want to remain around you. Unless it's benefiting them in some way. The narcissist is fully aware of the perks that they are getting from you. And that is why they spend so much of their time around you. If they really believed that they would be happier and healthier spend more time with themselves. They would probably be doing that. But they don't like to tell you just how great everything you're doing for them is. Because then it would make you look at them and realise how they're not bringing anything to the table. And then you would wonder what you're even doing around them. So they use a reverse psychology. They act as though you're beneath them. They act as though you can't do enough for them. And that is what keeps you endlessly running on that hamster wheel. Doing more and more for someone who has already got more from you than they ever got from themselves. Which is why they're so jealous and controlling. Which is why they can't go a second without you. Because they always needed you more than you ever needed them. Thank you for watching. I hope this video went to it with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. Check out the new Narc Survival website at www.narcsurviver.uk where you can read my blog posts, bug coaching sessions and join the support forum. If you would like to donate my PayPal link is in the video description. Coaching inquiries, email me at coaching.narcsurviver.uk Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.