 George Bruno with the 21 report. We're at the 21 convention the patriarch edition, and I'm talking with Stefan Molinou. Welcome Thanks, George. Great to be here. Absolutely We're talking about fatherhood patriarchs in the light of hope optimism and positivity in a world that's degenerate spiraling down. How do we remain optimistic? I I saw something that you had put out on YouTube recently about parenting some great tips and was reviewing that great solid stuff Absolutely, just total respect for you on that And I thought that would be a great topic. You had said something Conflict should be welcomed. A peaceful household is not necessarily a conflict-free household Yeah, so there's this idea I think it comes a little bit more from women than from men that Conflict is a problem conflict needs to be repressed needs to be avoided and conflicts are in issues The closest friendships I have are people that I've had strong disagreements with we've worked it out We've resolved it and we gained the trust of knowing we can do that and therefore we're free to disagree and both learn from each Other's perspective so this idea of a conflict free household I mean I was raised by a single mom My dad was out of the picture when I was a baby and he was like in Africa and I was in the UK So it was like the entire planet was between us and my mother had this belief That family life should be perfectly tranquil that that there should never be conflicts And so any time that there was a conflict it was a catastrophe, you know It's like rain on your wedding day, you know If every day is your wedding day all rain is a disaster and so it took me a long time To realize appreciate and understand the value of resolving conflicts if you don't have the capacity to have Conflicts with people and resolve them you can't trust them all you're doing is avoiding and given that we're inevitably going to disagree When you avoid conflict you avoid intimacy you avoid trust and I think that men's Greater comfort with conflict is something that society is really lacking I mean see all these free speeches these these bannings that went on Of of men and Laura Luma, of course as well And that's because society is not good at resolving disputes anymore We've just been so dispute avoidant that now it's gotten to this hysterical Semi-physiastic level of just banning people right for disagreeing. That's not how we grow That's not how we resolve things as a society. We need that masculine comfort with disagreement yeah, I saw someone somebody saw a picture of me and Cernovich and the comments down below there was one comment that said I can't believe you would associate with him I Am unsubscribing mm-hmm the comment below that was Wow, you're associating the Cernovich. I'm subscribing so it was this polarization, but I Like that mm-hmm. I like that it shows movement it shows movement It shows stiffness on their part Well men are not allowed to have allies in the modern world. We're not allowed to have groups We're not allowed to have sweat lodges. We're not allowed to have tribes We're not allowed to have you can have a man cave as long as you're not talking to other men about something important And you're just watching some Bruce Willis movie. That's fine Right, and so this is why you see, you know the the the conference here is under threat Yeah, the conference is to do with men's issues that I've attended in the past or all you got bomb threats death threats You name it, right? Because the world the West as a whole has become so female centric that The idea that men can have partnerships that men can talk to each other You know, there's this old cliche and I've known this for years I've talked about this on my show that you know a friend of yours who's a man He's in a bad relationship if the woman starts cutting off contact with his friends, right because she wants to isolate him So she can go full bunny boiler on him without his friends saying oh, she's crazy You got to like get out or you know, this is not good and so on So this isolation of men in modern society is a reason why these conferences are so important And why they're so opposed because if we start getting together and talking about stuff Well, you know, there's great strength in numbers. So we've got to stay isolated, you know We're allowed our video games. We're allowed a solitude. We're allowed a little room But the moment we start getting together with other men and talking about issues and learning from each other You know terrible stuff is gonna happen terrible stuff is gonna happen. That's right I remember at last fall's conference I was sitting next to a woman in the lounge in the bar in the lobby of the hotel that we're meeting at And as the speakers were coming in we see each other once or twice a year handshakes and Bro hugs as like the half, you know, where you kind of bump shoulders kind of thing And I came back to the bar and like every time a guy would come in I would welcome him and so forth and she says, oh, are you guys here for the parade? Well, we didn't know that that the 21 convention was scheduled during pride week right and And uh, the hotel was booked with the pride attendees and she saw men Happy to see each other shaking hands and giving each other a hug And she thought we were part of the pride week. I said, oh, no, no not at all I said, we're here for a masculinity conference And then she started scratching her head. It was more feasible for her to think That we were there congregating for the other thing Then for meeting about manhood masculinity positive masculinity Gearing up to be better men better fathers better citizens I thought that was interesting. That's an old Cliche that keeps men from having honest affection with each other Was that if you have any kind of positive affection for a man, you're gay Right and and that is something that scares men away a lot of times from being affectionate and then you get this Stoic stone faced carved out of granite kind of masculinity That is incredibly fragile right because where do we get our strength? We get our strength from flexibility from reason from community from from relationships or from intimacy And if we have to be isolated then we become weak You know, it's the old cliche that that's a good story, right? Like, you know one stick you can break you put a bundle of sticks together. You can't break them So yeah, we we have to be scared away from talking about our feelings at the same time as society says Well, you're not emotionally available. And then the moment you're emotionally available. It's like, whoa, whoa You must be gay, you know, all of these impossible Standards that men are subjected to and what that does of course is it teaches us to forget about the external cues And just, you know, follow your heart and and be friendly with people and be positive about the future and Listen to and give advice, you know One of the biggest topics that I've had in the past is around this question of single moms and dating single moms and so on And every time I've touched on it in a show I get like endless comments In like, oh, I tried it and it's a disaster now again Sometimes it works and all that but it's kind of the exception to the rule as a whole Can we share our wisdom about this kind of stuff? Well, no because you see that's to the benefit of men as it is talking about Diverse problems and problems of family courts and false allegations of I just did a show with a guy It was falsely his his father was falsely accused according to him by his mother of sexual abuse and a divorce Can we talk about these kinds of threats to men? Well, no because that benefits men and doesn't benefit women and the whole society seems to be around just Whatever women need whatever they want We're just these disposable cogs in a big conveyor belt to bring resources to women And anytime men say well, wait a minute. What's in this for me? How does this benefit me? Uh, you got to shut that guy up really really quick because otherwise other people might you know hear and right respond There's no male equivalent of you go girl Yeah, it is men men are you we are the worker drones, right? And we we have been through throughout history, right? I mean men are used as like lead soldiers just throw it into the fire of war You can't have your own I remember this as a kid like learning about the second world war and the heroics of the men And I remember as a kid charging down a football field Probably about six or seven, you know forward for some George imagining I was in a war and you get all this programming That your life is is just this empty shell to be used in in productivity, you know the old reality that That in in the free supposedly free market Labor-saving devices for women were invented before life-saving devices for men In other words the men who were down there getting coal that they had washing machines They had dryers They had all these wonderful things ovens for women before they developed basic ventilation and masks for the men in the coal mines You know and and so this idea of just being a worker bee and you just you're there to produce You're there to fight if necessary Uh, you're there for resources so that politicians can tax you and give to other groups this idea that society Should listen to men and men should have a say in how things go and that men's needs are important You know, you're really pulling the rug out of a very delicate house of cards that people want to keep standing. Absolutely You were talking about sugar in the household and our reaction to it And how might you bring up my nemesis I mean and that was fascinating. No one ever I never heard anyone talk about that. Yeah. Yeah sugar It's a big problem. Of course, uh, like sugar is the pornography of the buffet, you know And and so sugar is is a big issue Men are incredibly frustrated and thwarted. We've we've got a society You need a license to do everything things are very complicated You need to know people and you need to get the right permits and You remember seeing this guy who was weeping about a star wars Uh a trailer right and I I get where he's coming from because in the star wars universe You just you're swashbuckling. You're you're out there doing cool stuff. You can make things happen And there's not like well, I'm going to need this form in triplicate And then you got to have this corporation fill out this form and then you need this legal approval and that just saps men Like we are Adventurous and and we want to go out and explore and and conquer and risk Yes, and this society has become so averse to risk that it's now become anti Masculine like there's a fascinating thing you can people can see this on the internet Go look at playground structures from a hundred years ago Interesting. It's fascinating. See now playground structures. I mean, I'm a dad I go with my daughter to to the playgrounds. They got this soft squishy. Yeah, you know and everything's ground up tires It's all it's all soft and it's all low down and nothing's too you go to these Remember the monkey bars. Yeah monkey bars these things you could die on those things. Oh, yeah No, and now like if you go back and you look at these people The kids who were out a hundred years ago. These things just went halfway to the sky You know one drop and you're ding ding ding your way down to like some brain injury And the kids were fine and they got more exercise and they learned how to manage risk But you know, it's like that internet meme where the dad's throwing the the kid up in the sky and and you know What's really happening is the kids like this high above the dad What the kid feels is this high what the mom sees is is that high because women are very cautious And it's a beautiful thing. We need that risk. We need that caution But now society's just become so claustrophobic and so safe obsessed That men almost don't have any particular scope Which is why they pour so much energy into video games where you don't need forms in triplicate You could just go and risk and and take but it's all artificial and it bad for you in the long run again I like video games, but you know It's become a bit of a real sink for for young men in terms of productivity and that's because Achieving something on the screen is so much easier than trying to go out and achieve something in the world in real life. Yeah Modeling behavior for children you talked about reasoning With your kids as opposed to because I said so because I'm bigger and stronger and louder than you That really impressed me expound on that so There's been this cliche that has been developed about, you know, men, you know, we're big bullies with patriarchs We just you know, like big daddy in in some Tennessee Williams play We just like thump around and there's not the history of men has a lot to do with philosophy A lot to do with reasoning a lot to do with the development of common law and and how to negotiate in a society where people disagree strongly because you know for men We had duels, you know, like you you need if you and I had some big disagreement We'd need to find some way to reason it out Otherwise we're gonna end up, you know, one of us is gonna end up with a big hole in him and you know Fallen over sideways and bleeding into some gutter So because Men have had physical threats for disagreement. We've had to find ways to negotiate without that the feminine approach And again, this is very general There's lots of exceptions But the feminine approach tends to be if you have disagreements You spread poisonous rumors about the person until they lose the will to live and there's not that kind of direct You know, they're not gonna have duels and there's not that direct confrontation So this idea that men are just these big bullies and so on, you know Talk to any teenage girl about whether they fear more the boys or the girls when it comes to their reputation And their social standing and their happiness And so I think that once men are taken out of society We lose this capacity to negotiate which is why you get these incredible ugly hit jobs from the media with people They disagree with that's a feminine thing in general And it's why you have banning people is why you have the whole concept of hate speech You know because men can negotiate we can reason and I think for the most part men We don't like to lose but we recognize the benefit of losing an argument Which is that we have something better than before and for women it feels almost too humiliating I think for a lot of women so When men get shuffled more and more out of the public square You end up with these massive tangled complicated disagreements that you can't resolve with reason and evidence And so you end up running into the government you end up with hit pieces trying to destroy people's reputation Or when men are trying to get together at this 21 convention You end up with threats that are designed to shut down the whole thing You know violent violent threats and that's That you you can't run a civilization that way. Yeah. Yeah What would you say are the most important things that we can tell our kids? A lot of dads here are going to be watching this Most important thing men matter men matter Foundationally the civilization that we have It was It's it's a it's a complex combination and we've just taken out half of the whole equation So, yes It was built by men and those men were raised by women and they were fathered by men Right, but the the entire sort of basis of our civilization I played this game with my daughter sometimes in canada if there's an ice storm You know if we're driving around and it's late at night And we'll say hey, let's spot the women up there You know on the hydro lines, you know repairing things and we've yet to see one, right? I mean and every time we see some oil rig You know as like can we spot the woman at the in the oil rig and But it's kind of out of sight right like who is it who we deal with mostly in cities You know service workers or daycare workers teaches a lot of women and that's that's great and women have a lot to contribute But everything we walk on You know the roads the buildings the all the infrastructure that like the women will choose the taps But the men build the sewage systems, you know like the taps are kind of useless without the sewage systems and so men really matter and When men have built a civilization out of you know blood sweat and tears What generally happens is then the aesthetics of that civilization get taken over by women and women make places beautiful Don't get me wrong. I mean the guys, you know, what do we like a tv and a couch? That's about it and women make things beautiful and it's a wonderful part But in the beautification of the civilization built by men What happens is the male contribution gets taken for granted and Men really matter they matter when it comes to parenting the these statistics I'm sure you know them as well as I do George these statistics of what happens On average to children who don't Get fathered. Yeah or catastrophic absolutely absolutely and and lack of Fatherhood or lack of father presence is an environmental toxin For I mean if something came in like there was a gas that was seeping into people's households that produced the promiscuity and produced the aggression and produced the Dropping out of school and the drug use and all of this stuff. We'd be like We've got to stop our whole society find the source of the leak of this toxin and we've got to seal it up because it's Damaging children enormously father absence is incredibly toxic for most children I mean there's some bulletproof kids who get through it. Okay, but for most children So, you know the men really matter and even in the maintenance of our civilization There's this general slowdown that's happening these days, you know planes falling out of the sky potholes increasing You got water problems in flint, you know There's this arc and momentum that men have when they propel a civilization and build it You get this arc You're like, you know if you're going up in a plane and your engine cuts out you still go up for a little while Yeah, you know, but then you know Right. So men really matter and there's a whole cadre and and and propaganda mill in society that's constantly telling men You're toxic. You don't matter. You're negative. If only you're basically just broken women You know, if you were just like women, everything would be wonderful Even though historically female rulers initiate war a lot more than male rulers That's something that people don't usually know So this idea that that the ideal is women and however men Deviate from that ideal is is negative and the problem have to be fixed. Yes, absolutely wrong If you look at how all of this stuff is communicated It's all almost all of it is on infrastructure built by men So without men, we don't have a civilization without women. We don't have beauty in a lot of ways So it's a great compliment to each other, but taking men out of the equation Well, what happens we know what happens is that when men get taken out of the equation Women women get married to the government you end up with socialism and everything falls apart true You did a great series on that too. That was Wonderful. Thank you. Loved it and I've I've been talking to a lot of young men And I'll say uh, so when are you gonna have a family? And not here, but it in my practice and in my travels And a lot of young people are saying this and you might have heard this as well I wouldn't want to bring a child into this world With the way the world is and I think to myself You know, there's never been a Better time or there's never been a good time to bring a child into the world. I mean every era ideal time. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, there's never been an era that's been ideal and there's this darkness. There's this pessimism That's amongst men young men right now What would you say? How would you speak to those men? How would you give them some optimism? a boost of encouragement About building a family Because young men are not building families anymore. They're not building legacies. What would you tell those men? Can I tell them? Tell them tell them directly. All right. Yes. Okay. So guys I completely and totally understand where you're coming from and I'm not going to just say that all of your caution and all Of your concern is misplaced. It's not There are real challenges in the world But here's the thing you're alive and the fact that you maintain your existence means that you're happy to be alive Now when I was growing up if you're like a young younger than me, which is not that hard these days But when I was growing up We were told about all the environmental catastrophes and they were much more imminent than the global warming stuff That's going on at the moment. We had like acid rain hole in the ozone. We were going to run out of plants when I was a kid We were going to run out of oil. Uh, there was going to be worldwide starvation and famines by 1980 I remember this when I was growing up in the 70s So we had all of that plus we had imminent nuclear Catastrophe imminent nuclear war where all of your math skills were going to end up as some shadow on a wall because the russians We had to drop the bomb or the chinese were going to drop the bomb nonetheless My mom had kids nonetheless You struggled through it and if you give up If good men of conscience give up on having families it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy Insofar as if all the good people give up the bad people take over So don't let that happen and don't let the joys of family be taken away from you by propaganda by fear mongering by bad people You have a great deal of power and positivity and virtue To bring to the world the fact that you're alive even though your parents had the living crap scared out of them By a bunch of propagandists is a good thing, right? You're happy to be alive and when it comes to money as well because that's like the big thing We're the first generation. You're the first generation growing up poorer and with fewer prospects Than the boomers right then then the elder generation. But here's the thing. You're still the second richest generation in history Out of the 300 or 500 or 700 generations that humanity has existed. You came in second That's not the end of the world. You know, that's not too bad people had kids during the fall of the roman empire People had kids during the black death people have kids during the spanish inquisition People had kids Greeks had kids in in greece when they were christians when they were ruled for 400 years by by the muslim hotoman turks I mean There's always been a reason to not Enjoy life to create life to experience the joys of parenthood and the joys of fatherhood. There's always been a reason Don't let the fear mongering when you're still the second richest and second greatest opportunity generation in human history Don't let people take that away from you. You'll find a way to make it work Some things you have to do with way ahead of planning, right? You want to build a bridge from one side of a canyon to another You got to plan that you got to build it like crazy. You got to meet in the middle You can't drop one rivet without threatening the whole project That's not how family works. How family works is you find someone you love You're a good enough person that bad people are repelled by you and good women are attracted to you Which means you're not going to get pillaged in some divorce court. I've been married for 17 years So I kind of know what i'm talking about with regards to that But with family you take a running leap You jump and the bridge gets built through your momentum. That's the way it's always worked Your income will go up when you get married and your income will go up when you become a father That's just the way it's always worked. So if you're going to wait for the perfect bridge Which is what people tell you to do because they don't want smart good people having kids because they want dumb people to rule Just take that leap across the canyon as all humanity has had to do throughout history under far Graver threats than we face right now. Just take that leap and you will find it amazing How much power and support you will get simply from taking the risk because the greatest risk Is to not have children the greatest risk is to not experience the joys Of parenthood because then the second half of your life in particular Kind of a bleak and empty and lonely place. So fulfill your destiny. Have those kids save the world another message of hope positivity and optimism from a father Stefan mollinou. Thank you, sir. Great pleasure. Thank you