 وَأَقُولُ فِي القُرْعَانِ مَا جَاءَتْ بِهِ آيَاتُوهُ فَهُوَ الْكَارِيمُ الْمُنْزَالُهُ وَأَقُولُ قَالَ اللَّهُ جَلَّ جَلَالُهُ وَالْمُسْطَافَ الْهَاديِ وَلَا أَتْ أَوْوَالُهُ الحمد لله رب العالمين والصلاة والسلام على أبد الله ورسوله نبينا محمد وعلى آله وصحبه أجمعين النس عديث إزال حديثة أناس رضي الله عن أنه قال كان رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم أحسن الناس يخلقى The Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم was the best of people in Manus وكان لي أخ يقال له أبو عمير يسأل لها أبو عمير His name was Abu Umair أحسابه قال كان فاطيمة I believe that he said that he had just been weaned قال فكان إذا جاء رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم فراءاه قال يا أبا عمير ما فعل النغير قال فكان يلعبو به رواه مسلم He said that when the Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم would come And he would see the little boy He would say to him يا أبا عمير what happened to the نغير The نغير is a little bird like something like a sparrow Like a very small bird And the little boy used to play with it He used to have it like a pet And he used to see him playing with the little bird So when the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم would see him He would say to him يا أبا عمير فعل النغير He would use like a rhyming word to speak to him in a very sweet way And give him attention even though he was a very, very young boy And he used to be known for playing with that small bird And the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم asked him يا أبا عمير What happened to the نغير What happened to the little bird And this is from the excellent etiquettes Like Anna said it was the best of the people in Manus That he would even speak to the small children And he would ask them about the games that they played He would speak to the small children And he would ask them how they were This is from the excellent manners of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم And we should do the same with our children And with children in general Then we see them, we give them some attention And we talk to them And we look at them and what they're doing And we give attention to it They like to play a particular game We ask them about it Maybe they like a particular food And we ask them about it Or maybe we know that they're doing something Be it in school or something like that That they're doing at the moment And we ask them about it We keep in touch with what they're doing This is from the excellent manners Of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم And the things that we should try to emulate with our children The next point that we're going to cover It's the statement of Allah عز وجل وَبَتَلُوا الْيَتَامَا حَتَّى إِذَا بَلَغُنْ نِكَاحَ فَإِنْ أَنَسْتُمْ مِنْهُمْ رُشْتًا فَدِفَعُوا إِلَيْهِمْ أَمْوَالَهُمْ And this relates to giving responsibility And it relates to the orphans However, there is no harm in us taking a benefit from this An ishara from it Towards how we behave with our children Test the orphans Such that when they reach the age of maturity If you sense from them that they are responsible Then give them their wealth Here, surat al-Nisa Iron number 6 This is an excellent etiquette we can have Without our children also And that is giving them increased responsibility And testing how they manage with it And not getting angry We've heard the hadith of Anas Not getting angry about When they might not necessarily fulfill it But giving them small tests of responsibility I'm going to give you some money to keep for yourself This is your money It could be a very small amount When you see they're responsible with it And they're careful with it Give them a little bit more And so on And you build up their responsibility like that And even though this is something Which Allah عز و جل commands us specifically With regard to the orphans Because they could have a large amount of money That we are keeping it safe for them That this is a particular methodology with them There is no harm in us extracting this benefit In how we deal with our children Giving them responsibility Testing them and observing how they manage The responsibilities they're given It could be even a non-monetary responsibility It could be something that I'm going to give you Responsibility to do this job in the house And when you see that they're doing that responsibility You know that they can manage a little bit more And a little bit more And you're observing that by the time They reach the age of maturity And they reach the age of puberty You know that they can handle responsibility And they are sensible with their finances Money and things like that It's a very very beneficial life lesson It's a part of Tarbiyah really But it's an excellent excellent thing We can do is just to observe our children And just to keep giving them Little tests of responsibility And to watch how they do And when we see that they succeed We can give them a little bit more next time And a little bit more next time Until Subhan Allah will see the fruits of that When they reach the age of maturity And Subhan Allah we see all the children these days And we see that these all the children Even sometimes young adults And they can't manage responsibility They don't know how to manage their money If they're given a job to do They don't perform it properly And Subhan Allah makes you feel like That perhaps it could be the case that They didn't get that Tarbiyah In terms of responsibility And what we can also benefit from Is a narration from the Hadith of Anas رضي الله عن He said كان رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم من أحسن الناس خلقه فأرسلني يوماً لحاجة فقلت والله لا أذهب He said The Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم Was from the best of the people in Manus He sent me one day to do a job And I said والله I'm not going to go وفي نفسي أن أذهب لما أمرني به نبي الله صلى الله عليه وسلم But in my heart I was intending to go and do what he had Told me to do And this was a very young boy when he was sent to Serve the Prophet ﷺ He was a young child And he said والله I'm not going to go And then he said But I had in my heart that I was going to go and do What the Prophet ﷺ had Asked me to do from this One of the personal matters The Prophet ﷺ had asked him to do He said في السوق He said I came out until I passed by some young boys That were playing in the market فإذا رسول الله ﷺ قد قبض بقاثايا من ورائه He said The Prophet ﷺ he took hold of my neck from behind He said When he was playing with the boys in the souk In the market place He said The Prophet ﷺ came behind me And he took hold of my neck from behind قال فنظرت إليه وهو يضحك He said I looked up at him He said If the Prophet ﷺ The beginning Anas didn't know that he would be angry or not Because he had said والله I'm not going to go So The Prophet ﷺ he looked up at him وهو يضحك He was laughing فقال يا أونيس أذا هبتوا حيثوا أمرتك He said أو أونيس And he didn't call him Anas He called him a little Like a sweet name يا أونيس Did you go where I told you to go قال قلتون أعم أنا أذهب يا رسول الله He said يا I'm going on Messenger of Allah سبحانه وتعالى Look at the way the Prophet ﷺ The first time he asked Anas to do it Anas said والله I'm not going to go And then he went out And he started playing with the boys in the street The Prophet ﷺ came behind him And he took hold of him from behind And Anas got frightened And thought Maybe the Prophet ﷺ is angry with him And he looked and the Prophet ﷺ Was laughing at him And he said أو أونيس أو أونيس Did you go where I told you to go Are you going He said Yes, I'm going to go and do what you told me to So look at the excellent way The Prophet ﷺ dealt with Anas رضي الله تعالى عنه وأرضى When it came to that Sometimes when you ask your children to do things That might not be The way they might not do what you want On the first time They might not They might get upset and say No, I'm not going to do it And look at the way The Prophet ﷺ dealt with it Because it wasn't a matter of the It wasn't a matter of the حلال And the حرام It wasn't from the matters that were I mean matters of the religion But a personal matter that affected The Messenger of Allah ﷺ So the Prophet ﷺ was gentle with him And he just He gave him some time Just to You know Just to go and play And then he came to him And he said You gone where I told you to go And I said I'm going to go So he went And he went to To do the job That the Messenger of Allah ﷺ Asked him to do From the rights that our children have And this is an important right That we have to give emphasis to Is that which is indicated In the حديث Which is narrated by Imam Malik In his موالطة And the حاكم And others And that is that the Prophet ﷺ Said There is to be no harm Caused To anyone And Here the The harm There's a lot of different discussion About the difference between A ضرر A ضرار It's said that it means intentional harm And unintentional harm And there are many other discussions On the meaning of this But it's really important That we don't harm our children We don't do anything that would harm them Or bring about harm to them And that's what you see from the example Of the Prophet ﷺ He didn't do anything to That would bring about harm for those children And that could be a physical harm That could be a Psychological harm That could be something to harm them In terms of their future And their prospects And of course when we're talking about this We're talking about the light of Islam We're not going to sacrifice their religion For the sake of the dunya But that is one example of harm Right Where some of the parents They sacrifice the child's Religious status And religious education And religious observation They sacrifice this Because they want to give them A bigger chance in the dunya And in reality this doesn't This doesn't give them a bigger chance in the dunya Because the dunya is in the hands of Allah ﷺ But ultimately this Is a kind of ضرر It's a kind of harm That people bring upon the children Exposing them to the haram Is a harm That a parent brings upon the child Exposing them to the haram And causing them to To suffer Or to have to experience Haram being done In front of them But also this is from the things That causes harm To the child So it's very important As we conclude our discussion On the rights of the children And I brought this at the very end Very deliberately That really we want to It's kind of a summary That really is very very important That we look And we try to do everything That would benefit our children And we don't do anything That would cause our children harm Or would bring about harm for them And the greatest harm We could bring about for our children Is something that would cause them To be punished by Allah ﷺ Or would cause Allah ﷺ To be angry with them Or would cause them to enter the fire There is no greater harm than that So ultimately we must keep our children Away from those harms And also the things that would harm them In the dunya We must look after them And take care of them Because they are a huge blessing And a huge investment That brings me to the end Of what Allah ﷺ made it easy For me to gather from the rights Of the children And the obligations of the parents What remains in this segment On children Is to talk about When things go wrong And some generic advice And that's again going to be closer To a نصيحة An advice That I'm going to put forward As to what you should do When the relationship with your children Has gone wrong And maybe the tarbiyah That you were hoping for them Has gone wrong Or the way that you were hoping For them to develop Has gone wrong We need to give some advice In this regard Just like we did on the topic Of marriage About how to manage it When the marriage goes wrong When things go bad In the marriage How do we handle that Likewise How do we handle things When things don't go the way We would like With regard to our Our children Particularly The older children It can be very difficult So we're going to give some advice In this regard In Sha'a Allah In the next episode And in Sha'a Allah That will bring us to a conclusion On the topic of our children And the rights And responsibilities As it relates to the children Or the children As part of the Muslim family And we will go on In Sha'a Allah After that To deal with the whole new segment As it relates to parents And how a child Should be towards their parents The rights of the parents And obligations towards the parents In Sha'a Allah And then again Onto the wider relatives And the relationships That are there Salatul Rahim Keeping the ties With the family members And so on That's what Allah made easy For me to mention In this episode And before we conclude I would like to Invite the students Who have been following this course You've been on a Quite a journey with us I think we have now Reached The region of 40 Episodes وَلَيْلَا الْحَمْتَ By the grace of Allah As-Sauddhu I'm sure that you had questions If you have questions And you would like to Have those questions answered As part of the course So it's not like an individual answer But we would look at those questions And we would actually Do a Q&A episode For this course In Sha'a Allah Before the course concludes Then I would invite the students Who would like to do that To send their questions To questions At A-M-A-U Dot Org Questions At A-M-A-U Dot Org And if you could put in the subject Muslim Family Because that email is used For other types of questions as well If you just put Muslim Family In the subject What we will do is Gather the questions together Summarize them And we'll try to produce A Q&A episode At the end of the series In Sha'a Allah To answer the questions That you might have That things I might have raised Or things that you didn't understand Or things I didn't explain properly In Sha'a Allah Because I think that's You know that's A beneficial way of interacting With the students In Sha'a Allah As it relates to this course Which has been a long course Longer than we expected It would be Alhamdulillah So In Sha'a Allah Those students who've You know Had patience And been through it And gone through it And they would like to ask some questions You're more than welcome To send your questions To questions at AMU Dot Org And In Sha'a Allah What we will do is We will go through them Only the ones that relate to the course Now it doesn't mean you can't ask Other questions That you're welcome to ask Questions whenever you like But In terms of this part Of this Segment here Is to answer questions That are related to material In the course In Sha'a Allah To add And we'll try to do a Q&A Episode Which we'll try to release Along with the series In Sha'a Allah Or shortly after the series Concludes In Sha'a Allah Whatever Allah makes easy So that brings us to the end Of this episode And Allah knows best Wassalaatu was-salaam Alanaabina Muhammad وعلى آله وصحبيه أجمعي السلام عليكم If you're enjoying these videos And you'd like to keep up to date With all of the courses We're going to be running Make sure you head over To amauathome.com