 On February 19th, 1944, my grandmother, Joyce Haynes, was born on September 2nd, 2021. That's when she passed away. Today, I went to her funeral. And it was kind of tough. This is not my first time dealing with death in the family. A few years prior, I want to say maybe 2017, I lost my grandfather on my dad's side. This is my grandmother on my dad's side as well. And I lost him. He passed away. And it was really tough. That one hurt. And this one hurt as well. And I think what kind of really gets to me sometimes is the fact that the last time I saw her, which was, I want to say, maybe like last week, actually, it was my first time seeing her in two years. It was really my first time going to see my dad and everyone else that stays in Bryan College Station since my grandfather passed on that side of the family. And to see her in the condition she was, she wasn't really saying much. She was asleep at the time. But it had just gotten to the point where she wasn't eating much, wasn't drinking much. And you can tell her time was coming. And I think what was also tough for me is the fact that when my grandfather passed away, I don't think she really knew who I was. And I think for anyone that's dealing with someone that's going through dementia is that so tough. It's not because they don't want to remember you, it's just they can't. And I think that kind of kept me away from going down there. Granted, I knew she was in good hands. My dad was making sure she was good. My aunt Denise, my aunt Lisa, my aunt Michelle, they were pretty much her caretakers. They were doing everything they could to make sure she was okay. So I knew she was going to be fine. But it still was tough for me because it's like I couldn't really see her, not because I didn't have the means to, but because I was just afraid to, because I know it was going to like eat at me because she doesn't really remember me anymore. But I will say this, even though the last time I did see my grandmother alive, she was asleep, not really knowledgeable of who was there and what's going on. She was just kind of asleep. It was that comfort that I knew even though her time was coming, I still got to see her one more time. Still got to relive those memories one more time, still got to be in her presence. And I didn't really say it out loud, but I said it in my head and I hope she heard it. That I love her and thank you so much for everything you've done for me. And I'm making this video because I'm dedicating this to my grandmother. And I want her to know that I love her for everything she's done. I hope to continue to make you proud what I'm doing on YouTube. I hope that you're able to look down upon me and see the good that I'm doing. I want to make sure that me having the Haynes in my name continues to be synonymous with greatness. For those who don't know, my last name is hyphenated, Ross Haynes. Grandmother's last name, Joyce Haynes, obviously married to my grandfather, Marion Haynes. So I want to keep the Haynes family name meaning something of positivity. My dad, strong man, and I would love to one day be as strong as him because he's lost his father and his mother. And seeing him today how strong he was, it was crazy. And I know, you know, he has a lot of emotions going on as well through this whole situation. But the one thing that he's told me is he's blessed. He's blessed to have had her this long. He's blessed to have had her in his life. And hearing someone say that, even knowing what the situation is shows a lot of strength, shows a lot about them, that they cherish those moments and that I should also cherish them as well. So shout out to my dad for being very strong through this tough time. I love you, Pops. And I know she would be happy to see you being as strong as you are during this tough situation. I don't even think she would want him to be down and out. She would want him to keep pushing forward because that's how my grandmother was. I don't think I can ever recall a time, me personally, where she was just down and out or, you know, like had a negative attitude. She was always trying to find the best of people and she was positive, you know, and that was always crazy to me. I'm sure she had her bad moments, but I rarely saw it. She made the best of any situation. And I'm very thankful to have had her in my life for this long. It is a blessing. I want to give a special thanks to my friends, Doug, Trill Billy. Thank you all for being there for me during this hard time. You know, keeping me in great spirits, keeping me laughing. I want to thank my close family members that are checking up on me, making sure I'm good. Friends that were checking up on me. You guys know who you are making sure I was good. And of course, the clutch squad, people that subscribed to my channel. I got a lot of DMs when I initially posted on my story on Instagram when she passed away last week. A lot of DMs on y'all checking up on me and I want to say I thank you for that. I didn't get to read every last one of them, but best believe I'm very thankful for how you guys really been making sure I was good. And that made me feel like I'm not alone. And I want to say I love all you guys for that. So thank you so much. Thank you for the condolences to me and my family and what we're going through. And I'm just very thankful. And I want to end it off here because I don't want this video to be too long. But I want to say this, that enjoy the people you have in your life while you can. Cherish those memories. Cherish those fond memories. Check up on people. Say, you know, hello to people. Tell people you love them while you can. Because there's going to become an opportunity or a time where you won't be able to no more. And all you'll have is those memories and those times that you did interact with that person. So make sure you guys do that. If you have some issue with someone, let that go. Life is really short. Not to say that my grandmother's life was short, but I'm just saying in general life is short. Let the petty pettiness go. No, no point in having hating your heart for someone when you can just let it go. Focus on being a better version of yourself and focus on enjoying life. And before I end this video, I just want to say, Grandma, I love you. I'll always love you to my grandfather. I love you as well. And I hope to continue to make both of y'all proud. And I'm just very thankful to have had y'all the majority of my young adult life. I'm gonna miss you, Grandma. Rest in peace. Enjoy James. See y'all on the next video.