 I'm so happy to be here with Manon and I want to just have you say your your your name for for everybody. Yes, thank you. I'm happy to be here. I'm Manon. It's awesome. Well thanks for being here and let me just share your official bio with everyone and then we'll get into this conversation where we will talk about what does it mean to simply start so I'm excited about that. Manon is a community builder and entrepreneur and leads a global community of coaches. She believes that the only way to grow yourself and your business is to simply start which is actually the name of her business. And the only thing you need is to know to know is your next step. She brings together coaches in her community so that they can grow together in business and coaching and learn from each other from inspiring experts and mentors, and I'm really grateful that I've already had a chance to do some teaching and you're in your community so thank you for bringing me there. So, let's get into this I, you have been helping so many coaches and entrepreneurs and just people who want to simply start a project. I want you to kind of talk about this. Well, let's start here. Why is it so hard for, for so many people, especially thinking about the people you work with. Why is it so hard for them to start. That's such a good question. And of course, I think like for many people, the thing that we teach and do is to think that we have to learn ourselves the most. And I am a chronic overthinker myself. I think that's actually often it, we just overthink and what's underneath it is probably things often like maybe fear, fear of being rejected fear of not succeeding. I think it's probably the things that we probably would need to do or figure out as we go and I want I read a quote actually recently that said something like when we procrastinate or perfectionism is often just a reason to procrastinate. I think, yeah, but underneath it. I think almost always is just a fear. Yeah, absolutely and I mean just from what I can tell I think you embody the ability to just start and get going so I think you're an inspiration to your, your audience your people I mean one example for example is that you live in Bali right now. Yeah. And that is a big move I mean where did you originally in Amsterdam that right. I'm originally from the Netherlands. A few years ago I decided to leave the Netherlands behind also without actually really knowing what was just a strong calling of leaving things behind and seeing where life would take me, which was not always an easy journey. But I think when we live from the heart it isn't always necessarily easy but it's always about taking that next step that feels right might feel scary and try that the same time. Yeah. Yeah. So, there are a lot of people watching or listening to this who are wanting to simply start their business, or to take their business to the next step. What, what is it, how do you, yeah guide people or encourage people as they take that scary next step I mean we know intellectually that that we can overthink, and there's perfectionism. But now what, now how do we actually do it. Yeah, and I'm not going to have like I was afraid you're going to ask me what is your one thing a point of advice because I don't probably have that. Because it's, it's easy to say just do it, but right question is do what do what. Yeah, I think sometimes we cannot do it alone sometimes we can but what what I want to help people with is to go back to that feeling of, I want this, what does excite me about it, you know, instead of the overthinking go back to that place of excitement. I always want to help people get back to where it feels exciting and small. So make it small and unconnect I guess with with what it is that you want to do and why you want to do it maybe why you want to serve people because often your audience also. What they want to do is serve and help people. And there's a feeling there and a spark. So I would always say connect first with that again. And what's the smallest possible thing. And of course when I work one on one with people or in the community with people. We go there and we go there together. And we figure out what is that one next step that feels actually exciting it feels scary but also exciting. And sometimes it's also about just finding your accountability or finding a partner doesn't have to be professional coach, but someone that can be your cheerleader and can help you hold accountable because there's not one perfect next step. There's just a next step. I love that. I love that because that that's part of the problem is, yes, I know I need to take steps, but I want to make sure I take the right step, and that even before I take the right step. I have to have all my ducks in a row. Because there's the assumption that when I take each step I take should not make any mistakes. Each step I take should be enormously successful. I take the right step exactly like you say there's one right step to one right outcome and actually reminds me of an example from another coach if I may share. Yes, he I interviewed him actually because he also he started and also from actually from place of okay, I must make this work now or I really want to make this work now. And he was still in his training and he's also an improv teacher and people told him, oh, you should do an improv workshop for coaches, and he said that's a great idea so he did it and only like one or two people signed up. So he was like, okay, this is a failure. This is not going to happen but he did make one post on Facebook when he pronounced it announced it and somebody in a corporate saw that and reached out to him and said hey do you also do this for corporates. And he said, yes, of course, he never did of course but yeah answer is always yes. And that became his biggest client. So that step wasn't necessarily led to the success he thought but it led to actually something way bigger that he couldn't even have imagined. So that's that's I guess is also stories like that are so inspiring because it helps us to remember that the possibilities are way more than we can probably currently think of. And okay so one of the things that people that keep people from taking steps forward is the feeling of confidence. Right. I mean especially in the beginning, which is why so many people take trainings. Got to take another guy and I say that as somebody who sells trainings and courses. I still hope that people will get used to the feeling of taking steps, even without confidence but tell us let me talk to us about this like having you. What do you think about that confidence. And even, you know, even a lot of experienced coaches that still go through phases of. Yes, but I'm actually doing to actually know what it's what I'm doing as a coach. Am I doing it well so I think it's a feeling that can almost always stay with us. And this is something that helped me a lot and that's, it's what Brené Brown calls the FFT strategy I don't know if I'm allowed to say. Yes, please. Please dance for fucking first time. And we all know Brené Brown probably and she says, you know when you reach a certain age like end of your 30s you realize that there's only one way through to read something that feels uncomfortable and it's right through it. And she says the best strategy and I also use it is to actually acknowledge and name it wait. This is an FFT. This is uncomfortable. This is this sucks and this is going to suck for a while. It's normal. You know, so also normalizing it. And, and I think confidence is also another I do think confidence grows as we do, because I grew so much in confidence by just building my business because you know I'm, I didn't grow up as an entrepreneur or being easily out there, you know, I'm a shy I was I used to be a very shy entrepreneur I'm still an introvert but you know I, I taught myself to be more comfortable being out there and it grew my confidence. So I think you have to do. I also think that when we sometimes start a business we tend to focus a lot on the doing. I do think at least half of our success is determined by also in a work about you know looking at also the owning our gifts and our confidence and I think the doing helps also with that. But when we keep on feeling stuck and not good enough I think there's also something there probably to look at like, okay what is under this. I wonder if you have any thoughts on how gender can play a role in all this. I think in many cultures. Boys are encouraged to experiment and, you know, kind of like be more bold and girls tend to have some programming towards, you know, getting things right, or being perfect or something like that. And so I always admire, while I admire everybody who takes steps forward, but I imagine it might be it's probably different for women versus men. It's unfortunate, and I hate admitting it, but it's true I see it. I mean, for instance, also see with coaches that I know that when it comes to charging. More often hear men down women say of course I charge you decent amount and men sometimes start coaching, you know, and when they start their training or when they read the book, they already feel confident enough to just doing do it and women want to have that certificate. It's amazing and it's not for everybody, but I do see it more often that people women want that certificate first, or that proof of validation and I think it's exactly like you said it's, it's how we grew up. It reminds me of, I'm a big fan of planet oil and our book on tamed, and she gives an example of her daughters and she. Has a bunch of kids over and they're watching a movie and they're a bunch of boys and a bunch of little girls and she comes in and ask that does anyone want pizza, and the boys don't even look up they say yes, and the girls like look at each other are checking and seeing and looking for validation and then one represents the group and says no we're fine. So we, I think it also has to do with that we just are conditioned differently. And the boys. Yeah, grow up more. Yeah, just having that, not confidence but just doing and trying and looking less for external validation. Yeah. Yeah, well, actually, so this is one of the reasons why being in a group or community of, you know, really maybe for women, it's like being in a group community of starters of people who take action is so encouraging and effective because they're looking around and it's like oh yeah everyone else is taking action to. Oh, everybody else is scared to do it anyway. Yes, and I really like sharing so I like sharing lessons from experts and mentors and people who are a lot of further along but but I also love sharing I also send a weekly email and this I share lessons from some coaches that maybe are two steps ahead that just started that launched the first group program and share. I was so scared, and I procrastinated so long, but I finally did it, and I'm so happy. I think these are also inspirations not only the people that already build that massive business, but people that actually just like you and are not afraid to admit that they're also scared. Yeah, yeah. One of the things that you help people with is to get more clarity about that who it is they're serving. I mean they're ideal client, and you talk about how well it's so helpful to know who it is because then, you know, it's easier to reach them and to have have them notice your messages, but do you want to say anything about that that process that you've got to be helpful for others to discover who, who that is. I'm, so I'm, you know, I'm not a marketing expert. I, my, my, my experience also comes from my own doing and from what I see from others. I do not believe that you need to have your niche exactly figured out before you start. I think it's what a lot of marketing experts will say, but what it does when we don't know is that we got stuck here again, and that we try to think in a logical way like, Okay, I, I used to be a lawyer so maybe it makes sense to now, and that could be, but maybe not it comes from the mind and then we get stuck and we start, you know, either working on our website a lot to tweak our content and tweak our niche content. And the only way I think if you're stuck on it is to get clear on it is to start doing, and I recently heard somebody say I really liked it. You know, a dance with the universe or something like you just throw something out there, and you start doing and you get feedback, and then it changes and of course people will maybe say, but if I don't know how am I going to reach them, you know, because then I cannot message them but I don't believe that, because there's always something that you do know. The only thing that you know is, you know your values, you know what you stand for you know what gives you energy and if you start putting out that out there. And if you literally start coaching everybody, and just, we have we all have a war network of people that don't even know what we do. You know, we often forget that the people around us even our family and friends, when they know you're a coach they actually know nothing. Maybe you start giving sample sessions to people around you not to have them as a coach but so that they know what you do. And you can practice. And get just by doing, and I do think often we know more than we, we admit because we're also afraid to choose. If you go back to a training or a certification you, you practiced a lot. So you, you can go back to seeing what gave, what gives me energy and what kind of people don't. And I think it's also the daring of owning it and saying no. Yeah. I love I love all this because I totally agree with you like, if you don't try working with different types of clients or potential clients. How do you know what really is a good fit. Like, I was really surprised when I was starting my business that, you know, of course I when I started probably many of us go our ideal client looks and sounds, just like us or has the exact same life experience and I found that my ideal client was very very different from me, who's surprising to me. And, but I wouldn't have known unless I had tried, you know, coaching and working with different, different people so I really love that. And, and this idea of making sure your network, you give as many samples as you can, because otherwise you don't have the experience of experiencing different people but also they don't really know what you do because when you say you're a coach. People don't really get it. Yeah, most people get it. What are, do you have any other, any other suggestions for actions for simply starting. You know what other types of actions do you find that your clients do that help them to keep moving forward. I know there's not one right answer but any other examples yeah. One thing that comes to mind is if you, another thing that often comes up is, oh I need a website. Right, right. Yes. I think if you have limited time because often I work with people that are still in a job and I want to build it beside the job. If you have limited time and you, you thinking about creating a website but you're not sure yet don't start with creating a website would be my advice because that, especially when you're not completely clear yet that will probably get you start behind the scenes a lot, because then you spend a lot of time behind the scenes, building your website and then your website's done and then nobody's seeing your website. So also then my advice would be, what is here right now what is near me who did I already coach and didn't ask for a referral yet, who is in my warm network that I can reach out to, and also network a lot and not network with the goal of getting I think that's often where we go wrong. Oh yeah wrong. I don't like to use the word wrong but also when we want to find a new job we start networking the moment that we lose our job and hope to have a new job but most fun I get and I have a strong network but the first year of my business, I spend so much time just genuinely giving, giving contact, having just conversations with people to see what's alive for them, seeing how I can help them, whether it's with an article or another person or whatever. So I would always say also just being out there and not necessarily the goal of having you as my client, but as genuinely, like how can I serve every single person that I meet. How can I help them and that's how you build incredibly strong network. I love it. It's so so much more of a fulfilling way, enjoyable way of relating to others, not to look at each person is what can you do for me what can you do for but what can I do for you. If someone is in your network, especially they're a friend or colleague. There's something you enjoy and appreciate about them, you know, and that's like a great way to start the conversation right and then to learn more and to find out what I mean. Yeah, you are, you're an example of a generous person because, you know, the first, first way we got to know each other is you reach out and says hey, can I bring you to, to share with my audience, like, oh, okay, great. You know, and then naturally, I just said, well, gosh, my name is so generous. I mean, let me bring her to share with my audience to, you know, it was just a very natural, natural emergence of reciprocity. And anyway, so thank you for, thank you for saying that. I hope everybody watching this gets, you know, feeling inspired to simply start to take the next step and, you know, whether it's reaching out or to one's network or, you know, and not feeling like you don't have to build this fancy website I see this so often I'm glad you mentioned it. People say well, gosh first step in the business is to build a great website right. And they, they end up spending months doing it. And probably thousands of dollars. If they hire somebody to help with it. And then once they finish the website, their niche has already changed. And also if you don't hire someone you also spend thousands of dollars because your own time is just right. If you were just out there and there's one more thing that comes to mind if I may. A lot of coaches also like building a community or I one thing that I really see is, don't underestimate the value of connecting people, whether it is one on one, or in groups, people really value that so if you see that you attract a certain person or clients, maybe, maybe they want to be brought together and maybe you would enjoy that a lot of people we need more community and more sense of belonging so I think coaches can play a really important role in that. I love it. Well, we have just a few minutes left and I want to make sure people understand better. The service that you provide. So for the aspiring coaches out there who are wanting support to simply start or to take the next step and to keep taking steps. Tell us what you offer. Yeah, well, people can always go to the website. That's www simply hyphen is that the English word start.com. Yeah, simply hyphen start.com. Great. There's there's information about the coaches community in there that people can join. I will also make it possible for people to just join it to get a free month. So you can go to co active community also non co active coaches are welcome to join. Yeah, so all kinds of coaches. Yes. Yes, all kinds of coaches. And then there's also information on there to work with me one on one. And people can always just have a chat with me for an hour. And in that in that one hour I will at least have you walk back walk away with one piece of action and feeling inspired and excited again if if you are feeling stuck or don't know what to do. And if one then more that's possible but yeah I'm always happy to just have a chat. Very generous of you thank you for for offering that service. So, any other kind of final words of encouragement as we complete this conversation. No, I don't think so I think for me simply start does say it all and I also have like I just put the quote on my website recently because it resonated with me so much it's from Martin Luther King about the faith and faith is taking the first step when you don't see the whole staircase yet. And I think that's what it is about for me and, and patients, if you want to grow your business or whatever it is that you want to grow organically and authentically just like you also do and teach. It takes time, you know, and sometimes you do meet someone that in some way catapults your business, but more often than not, you know, it takes time and the fact that it is not as big as you want it yet doesn't mean that you're not really good at what you know we have to separate them. You have to separate the fact that your great coach or writer or actor or whatever from, you know, not I think Eckhart Tolle who wrote The Power of Now, it took years before his book reached a great audience. He wasn't reaching a lot of people for years, and he was already brilliant. So I think that's also an important reminder, the fact that it's not there yet doesn't mean we're not brilliant yet. That's a really great point. And for those who are able to join a community like yours, the colleagues and peers in the community will remind them that they are brilliant and to take action, and that it takes time. And it's more fun to do it together possible. Yeah, fun is important. Having fun in the process is I think, thank you for that. Yeah, I love it. Thank you for the service you provide and the way that you, you know, kind of model for your people, how, how to keep taking steps so. Thank you. Thank you for this time and I really, really enjoyed this conversation. And I hope you're going to do more together. Yes, yes.