 Item number SPC-172 Object Class Apollyocan Solation Puzzleization Contingencies Due to its anomalous effect, SPC-172 is unpuncable. In lieu of the abandoned full-scale punching campaign of SPC-172, the Darwin-Can-Eat-My-Ask Protocol has been enacted to drive SPC-172 to extinction through non-pognitorial means. Here to eradicate SPC-172 poses a non-zero risk of SPC-172-A spreading as a dominant evolutionary trait among sharks in the long term, which will result in an end-of-the-world KO failure scenario. Description SPC-172 is a salation entity known to civilians as the Narwhal. While technically a mammal, SPC-172 meets the shark-punching center's three criteria for verifiable sharkitude. Over time, male instances of SPC-172 have evolved a facial-stabbing implement here to 4 SPC-172-A that completely neutralizes all punching attempts. Punch-a-nation-attempt-log-172 Punch-attempt-punch-result-notes Agent Seagal uppercutting a captive instance of SPC-172 Falls positive We've been over this. It doesn't count unless it's directly in the shark's face. Coach Nismith Agent Seagal punching a captive instance of SPC-172 in the face Negative Following surgery and successful recovery, Seagal has since requested transfer to another project that doesn't involve punching a pointed stick. Agent Seagal punching a captive instance of SPC-172 in the face Harder Negative Good Lord! It's like he's wearing his arm as a hornsock! Coach Nismith Deployment of a Fist-Tipped AHAB-2 Unit modified for underwater deployment into an instance of SPC-172 Inconclusive An autopsy resulting cloud of shredded viscera was unable to return any evidence of successful facial fisticuffs. Agent Seagal punching a captive instance of SPC-172 in the face even harder with his other arm Negative The Fist came within 1.2 meters of the instance's face before Agent Seagal succumbed to lethal injuries consistent with Fist's kebabatization. Agent Norris punching a captive female ergo hornless instance of SPC-172 Not available Punched was initially successful and resulted in death of the instance, but autopsy revealed that female instances of SPC-172 are toothless, which causes them to fail the third criterion of verifiable charcuttude. Does it have pointy bits in ergo or not sharks? Agent Norris punching a juvenile male instance of SPC-172 with a smaller SPC-172A instance than usual in the face. Not available Come on! He's a kid! Coach Nismith Agent Norris punching a captive male instance of SPC-172 in the face harder than Agent Seagal. Not available I quit! Agent Norris Agent Norris punching a captive male instance of SPC-172 in the face harder than Agent Seagal or Coach Nismith will burn his house down. Negative The Fist came within 1.1 meters of the instance's face before Agent Norris succumbed to lethal injuries consistent with Fist's kebabatization. Solving off a captive male instance of SPC-172's SPC-172A, then punching it. Not available We're the Shark Punching Center, not the Shark Editing then Shark Punching Center. Lose the goddamn training wheels, Coach Nismith. Usage of Experimental Stylation Punching Device Hercules Hate Sharks to partially decrease the mass of Agent Norris' rocket-propelled disembodied fist in such a manner that it phases through the SPC-172A instance and lands on the captive male instance's face. Inconclusive The Vice Failed Dimensional Anomaly Generated Accidentally Punch God