 Okay. So you want to be a priority in a man's life. You want to be someone that he absolutely cherishes and when he thinks of you, he thinks of you as special and amazing and different than all the other women that he has met. So today I'm going to talk to you about why you need to value yourself if you want a man to value you. And I'm going to teach you, there's three components that I'm going to be talking about today and you need to know all three of those components in order to really create alignment and get a guy to value you the way that you want him to. So if you watch some of my stuff and you like what I'm talking about here and you value my work, make sure that you go and get my full system over at the foreverwomanformula.com. It's all about how to get a guy to see you and love you and cherish you as the most amazing woman that he's ever met in his life. So make sure you go check out the foreverwomanformula.com. So what I'm talking about here is initially something that's called belief transference. And so it's called the law of belief transference because whoever has the strongest belief system will transfer that belief to the people around them. And so if you have a belief about yourself that says that you're not worthy, you're not valuable, whatever, you're going to transfer that to everybody around you, specifically the guy that you're with. Even if he initially believes that you're really valuable and amazing and awesome, if you don't believe it, if you believe something else, you will transfer that belief to him if your belief is stronger than his is, which it probably is. And so again, if you're here with us, make sure that you go into the chat and say, hello, we love it to see all these amazing women from all over the world saying hi to us in the chat. So in order to create the right belief in yourself and transfer that to a man, you have to create alignment from your belief system that you're a valuable woman who deserves to be valuable. And the way that you do this is by creating alignment in three different things. One is your thoughts, two is your emotions, and three is your actions. And once those three things are aligned, it's really, really easy to get guys to value you. And you'll notice that everything kind of shifts and changes when you do that, where all of a sudden before guys might have maybe taken you for granted and not thought that much about you. And then all of a sudden you get all these guys kind of pining for you and wanting to please you and treating you completely differently. I've seen this in so many women in our community. It's absolutely amazing when it happens. And so how do you do this? So your beliefs come through your actions, they dictate how you feel, and the people around you will end up acting in accordance with those beliefs. When I was in college, I was a part of this class and we would have these different researchers come in and do these little psychological studies in our class. And one of the studies was around Kool-Aid. And with the Kool-Aid study, what ended up happening was a bunch of researchers came in with different colors of Kool-Aid and they sat them down on these desks and they poured little cups of Kool-Aid for everybody in the class. And so they had all these different colors and everybody got to drink every single color and then they had to choose which color was what flavor. And so naturally as everybody drank different colors, they guessed that red was cherry and purple was grape and green was apple and orange was orange and so on. And what ended up happening was at the end of the study, they revealed what flavor all the different colors of Kool-Aid was and what they found was that or what happened was that all the colors of Kool-Aid were all the same flavor. They were all apple and everybody thought because of the different colors that they were different colors and they experienced while they were drinking that color that it was a different flavor because their brain tricked them into thinking that it was something different. And the important part about this is that your perception, the way that you see things in your mind dictates how you experience the world. So if you believe that you don't really have value, if you don't think you're a valuable person, if you don't think men will value you, then you're going to experience in your life people not valuing you. And it doesn't matter what you do, it doesn't matter how many things or obstacles that you go through, you need to create this belief that you really value yourself otherwise you'll keep having problems over and over and over and over again throughout your entire life. I actually, this is something that I've had a really, really tough time with myself when I was a kid, I was a really bad kid. My parents were divorced when I was eight years old and by the time I was 12 I was doing a lot of drugs and by the time I was 13 I was getting kicked out of class and I was getting kicked out of school all the time, I got suspended from school over and over and over again. And one day, so I lived with my mom and my mom would take me over to see my dad on some weekends every once in a while. And so one day my mom had me pack up all my stuff and take it over to my dad's house for the weekend. And so I get over to my dad's house and after I was there for a little bit I went and I walked up to my dad and I said hey dad, when are you taking me back over to my mom's house? And I will never, ever forget what he said next. He looked at me and he said, your mom didn't tell you? You're not going back, you're staying with me now, you're going to be living with me. And at the time it was like this really, really painful moment for me because what I just realized was that my mom had just dropped me off and left me at my dad's house and wasn't coming back for me. And I ended up, like that next week I started this new school and got kicked out the very first day of school. And from that moment on, like from that period on for me, a lot of the things that I did in my life was all about trying to prove that I was deserving of love and I felt like deep down that I didn't deserve it. And so I did all these things. I like went and became an amazing athlete. I did really great at college and university. I went through some of the most, the toughest military training in the world and I like built these, this big business and did all these different things, trying to kind of overcompensate for this fact that I had this feeling and these beliefs deep down inside that I wasn't really worthy of experiencing love. And before anybody like hates on my mom or whatever, she did it for very good reasons. And she was coming from a place where she didn't know what to do with me because she was scared. And so she ended up just dropping me off at my dad's house and not coming back for me. And so, you know, for me, it was a problem in my life when I got into relationships because it didn't matter how many things I accomplished. It didn't matter how many times I did something great or made some kind of great accomplishment. I still, every time I would get into these relationships, I would create these weird situations where I would get into relationships with women that weren't really good for me or I would get into situations where I would end up getting abused or something. And so it wasn't until I started healing that part of me where I started actually creating relationships that were really fulfilling and whole and made me feel better and, you know, I was coming to them from a place of value and that was transferred over not only to the women that I was actually dating, but also to the fact that I wouldn't allow people into my life who weren't going to treat me well. And so it's very, very important that you replace any kind of belief systems that you have in your life that you're not worthy. Otherwise, you'll keep repeating the pattern over and over and over again where you get into bad situations, where you end up with guys that hurt you, where you get into these kind of places where you're not appreciated and loved and treated really well. And so how do you do that? So from the point of belief systems, what you need to do is you need to figure out what beliefs you have, right? Like what beliefs right now do you have? And the best way to do that is to just listen to the words that come out of your mouth. And it's interesting if you are part of our community, one of the things that you'll notice in there if you really start paying attention to it, is that a lot of women will say things in there that are just a reflection of what's going on with them, right? Like there's no good men out there or men are just dogs and pigs or on the other side, they'll be like, yeah, no, there's a lot of really awesome, amazing, great men out there. You just need to find the right ones that fit with you. And whatever you say, whatever is coming out of your mouth, even if it's not about men, maybe it's about yourself, right? Where you're like, no, you know, I don't think I'll ever find love or I'm too old or, you know, I'm too fat or I'm too whatever, right? There's a million different reasons that you can come up with why you won't ever find love. And it's those belief systems that hold you back and stop you from actually going out there and finding love because it doesn't matter what happens in your external situation like we talked about with the Kool-Aid, you will see what's a reflection of what's going on in your mind, not what's actually out there in reality. And so you need to start questioning any of your limiting or negative belief systems that you have. And you need to replace them with empowering belief systems. And then you need to emotionalize those new beliefs. And I do this totally in the Forever Woman program. I teach about how to shift your emotions and your belief systems. If you want to go check it out, you should go to the foreverwomanformula.com and check it out there. Let me know if you're in the chat right now. Let me know if you understand what I'm talking about. If you get what I'm talking about, say I get it. If you don't get it, ask questions about it, and we'll talk more about it here in a bit. So the second part of this is emotions. And the phrase that I like to use is hurt people will hurt people. And like a dog stuck in a trap, you will lash out and bite people who try to set you free. If you're a dog and you're in a trap, if you've ever seen videos of a dog that has a bear trap that snatched its leg or whatever, and it's trying to fight to claw to get its way out, and people come over and try to help it, but the dog lashes out and bites at them and stuff. And that's how people act metaphorically towards other people if they're still hurt. If you haven't healed yourself, you will lash out at people. You will attack people, not because you're trying to hurt them or because you're malicious or have bad intentions or something, but it's simply because you're trying to make sure that you don't end up getting hurt again. And so you'll end up doing things in order to protect yourself, which end up actually hurting you and the people that are around you that really care about you. And so what you need to do is you need to heal and express your emotions and let go of your attachment to that pain and suffering. And maybe even accept or bring in this dark side of yourself that you're afraid of or ashamed of or that you're pushing away or that you think is bad or whatever and create wholeness within yourself. There's this thing called shadow work out there, which I'm actually going to be doing some programs about healing here pretty soon. And so just watch for that. I do shadow work as well. So there's a lot of cool things that I'm going to be bringing out here pretty soon around healing. So I hope you all are excited about healing because that's what's coming next. That's what's coming next. So all right, the last one, the last part of this is actions. And so I get women all the time who are being taken for granted. They're doing everything in the relationship. They're trying everything they can, and their guy is still backing further and further away, or he's taking them for granted, or he's doing all these things where that are showing that he doesn't think of them as a special, amazing, valuable woman that he wants to be with. And so I get a lot of women that come to me and they say, hey, Matt, how do I get him to value me? I mean, this is one of the biggest questions that I get from women. And so what you need to do is a, so here's the thing. A person who doesn't know their value, you can usually tell because they will try to force someone to want them or to do the things that they want them to do. So they'll try to convince them, or shame them, or attack them, or manipulate them, or lie to them, or any of those force tactics that I talk about as things that you shouldn't be doing, because all force does is it creates resistance. And he'll try to get away from you and push away from you and go further and further and further away from you and lose attraction and lose love and all that kind of stuff. If you're trying to force a guy to do things that you want him to do, he will walk away. A person who knows their value comes from a position of power. And the most powerful position that you can possibly come from is a position where you're willing to walk away. And the way that you come from that position is by doing all the things that I talk about in the Forever Woman program where you have abundance, where you are coming from a place where you have options and you're not so attached to making things work with one dude, where you shift your mindset from I'm trying to make it happen and I'm trying to make it work with this one guy to I want to create the relationship that I want. If you have the mindset that you want the relationship and it's about the relationship and not about the guy, well, suddenly you'll stop trying to force this dude to do things and you'll start saying, OK, I want this relationship. This is more important to me than this guy is. And what you'll end up doing is shifting things around for yourself because then it's not, hey, I've got to force and manipulate this man to do what I want him to do. And suddenly it'll be like I need a guy who's in alignment with creating the type of relationship that I want to have. Because if I don't have a man who's in alignment, that relationship is never, ever going to happen. And so I firmly believe that you need to shift your mindset from the dude to the relationship. That is the most important thing you can do. So a woman who values herself, she has standards. And if a person isn't meeting those standards, she removes herself from that person unless that person is willing to step up to the plate. And that is the important thing to remember here. I get a lot of women that are like, oh, you know, like the ultimatums don't work. And they usually don't, right? They don't work in the sense that they will force or manipulate somebody to do something. They always work though in the sense that if you set an ultimatum, you get one of two results that are the best for you. And if you don't set an ultimatum, then you might end up staying stuck in results that don't work for you, right? For a really, really long time. We have women that have been in situations for a really long time that aren't good for them. So a woman of value, she's not afraid to communicate what she needs. And she does that with grace and intelligence through boundaries, compliments and sweetness. So she's not attacking him. She's not hitting him over the head. She's not treating him like crap. She's not being abusive in any way. She's being sweet and she has boundaries and she uses compliments. And she's like, hey, if you're not willing to do that, that's okay, it's not a problem. Just realize that that's the standard for which I need in order for a guy to be in my life. And also a woman of value, she's not afraid to say no to what doesn't work for her. And so that's it for all of the stuff that we're talking about here. If you have any questions specifically about your situation, make sure that you ask those questions in the chat. If you get what we're talking about here, make sure that you say, I get it. If you don't, you can ask questions about what I just talked about, or you can ask questions about your situation or whatever, I'm just gonna go over everything again and then I'll get to the questions. So again, if you want a man to prioritize you in his life, if you want a man who cherishes you and thinks of you as a special, amazing, awesome woman that he wants to be with, then you have to make sure that you are in alignment with being a valuable woman because of the law of belief transference, which states that whoever has the strongest belief about something will transfer that belief to the people around them. And so you need to have beliefs, emotions and your actions in alignment with you being a strong, valuable woman who deserves what it is that she wants in her life. And so that's that. Let's go to the chat and see if anybody has any questions. D Runaway says he used to, but doesn't now can't understand what happened. Well, if you ask D about your situation and tell us a little bit about what happened, we can dissect it and figure out what's going on and what you need to do in order to create the relationship that you want. So Catherine says, hi, hi, hi, hi. Raleen, Philippines, Illinois, Australia, Nicaragua, nice. Catherine says, you was a bad boy. I was, I was a very bad, very bad child. God's girl says, hi, Matt, I'm so proud of you. You are a blessing and a miracle. Well, thank you, I appreciate that. Renette says, wow, amazing life story. You don't, you haven't heard even half of it yet. Julie Tree says, hi, Matt, don't ever let a woman abuse and run over you ever you are valuable and nobody deserves that Julie Tree. Yes, I fully 100% believe that as well. Catherine says, oh, that chapter in your life is over and made you who you are today. You seem pretty cool, Matthew. Thank you, I appreciate that. Yeah, it's funny, I get a lot of women that are like, oh, you must have had just such an amazing upbringing, like such a really together family and everything was just so great for you when you're growing up to be such a well adjusted guy. And I'm like, no, that is not how things went in my childhood. Lorda says, I get it. I just need to or disise my new reliefs. What? I think what you meant to say was I need to practice my new beliefs. All right, Anna says, hey, hey, hey, Matt, love all your live chats and you have the most amazing smile. Well, thank you, I appreciate that. Sonia says that here you explain helps a lot, awesome. Debbie says I love listening to you, thank you. So Camilla says you are amazing, thank you. Renette says you are amazing, Matt, thank you for this advice, you are welcome. Yeah, I bet, Helena's here says totally agree you always give the best advice, Matt. Thank you, thanks, Helena. Susan says you have to value yourself first. That's right. Get it, get it, get it, get it, get it. Anybody have any questions here? Camilla says some chat about having an affair with the married man. Are you asking about chatting about having an affair with a married man? The answer is you shouldn't do it. For a number of different reasons and I've gone over that in great detail on other videos. There's another video about, I think it's called something like how to make a married man leave his wife for you or something like that that I did and it's all about what you should do if you're having an affair with a married man and I'll give you the cliff notes real quick. You should stop seeing him completely. That's what you should do and never talk to him again. Julie Tree says I believe in fully respecting men totally and vice versa, good. Alexandra says I like this third step action. I'm not forcing him to do anything that he doesn't want to do. I'm observing now either he will step up and show me affection and desire or he won't and then leave yet. Which is one of the reasons I talk about the whole abundance principle, Alexandra. I'm not sure if you're familiar with that one or not. However, the abundance principle is about creating more options in your life of men and connection so that you're not so stuck on him and whether it's gonna work out with him or not. It sounds, just based on what you said it sounds like you're in a good spot and you're feeling really good and so that's good to hear. Lord says, great, I want to be in total alignment. How do we get in alignment? You create your belief systems, you reshift your belief systems, you reshift where your emotions are and you shift your actions and once your beliefs, your emotions and your actions are all going in the same direction of saying, hey, I'm a valuable woman who deserves a great man who treats me well and adores me and cherishes me, then that is when you will get into a good relationship and not before that. And so a lot of times women come and they're like talking about how every guy that they meet is just looking to hook up or how every guy doesn't treat her well or whatever the case is, right? And how every relationship and she's ready to give up because every situation that she gets in is bad. And one of the things that I want to tell you about is kind of the law of the universe which I'm not big into talking about spiritual principles or anything like that. However, there's this thing out there where a lot of people think, oh, I just need to find the right guy and then everything will kind of fall into place and will be ready for me. But the reality is, is that if you aren't ready you are not going to get into that relationship. You probably won't meet the right guy and if you do meet the right guy you won't even see that he's the right guy because you're not ready for it yet. And so you, you have to be ready for the relationship that you wanna have otherwise you're never gonna get into it. It's gonna be very, very difficult for you to get into it. You have to be ready and the guy has to be ready. And if one of those two things isn't ready then you're not getting into the relationship that you want, you're not, you know, if you meet a great guy and he's perfect and everything's great except he's not emotionally ready yet or he hasn't figured out his job or he's, you know, in this place where his belief systems aren't ready you're not gonna get into that relationship that you want with him guaranteed because what will end up happening is he'll end up pushing you away just like I was talking about before where I said hurt people will hurt people he might end up hurting you or pushing you away not because he wants to but because he's hurt and you'll end up pushing him away not because you want to but because you're hurt and so you have to get into that alignment that's what it takes in order to be ready and it's not gonna, it's just, it won't happen until you're ready and so you have to kind of take a look at that and say okay where am I not ready yet? Where am I not ready? And look specifically probably at your belief system sometimes women come to us and they just need a few things from a communication standpoint or a doing standpoint where they just need to do this thing or do that thing and all of a sudden everything shifts for them and they're in this perfect relationship and we hear about that and usually the women that do that they aren't in our community for very long because they're like oh it's already worked and I'm out and then they send me a testimonial and I hear about it and I'm like awesome that's really cool but for most women most of the women that come to us they need a lot more of a shift, an internal shift because they have pain, right? Like our whole culture right now is filled with pain. We live in this hookup culture where people are just hooking up with each other and we have a lot of women in our community who are in those types of situations ships where they're just hooking up with people because they're afraid to get into a real relationship because they're still hurt inside and so they're not ready yet and it's really difficult for them to end up getting ready and then getting into the relationship that they want because they end up doing these hookup things and it just enables them to stop to not actually figure themselves out and all that kind of stuff and so what you need to do what you need to make sure you wanna do is get in alignment and like I said everybody here should have the forever woman program it's at theforeverwomanformula.com just go and check it out you can get it for free and my suggestion is that you go and check it out and that will help you get into alignment to attract the right guy to you. Debbie says what do you think of younger men being attracted to older women? Well I think a lot of different things about younger men being attracted to older women I mean there's good and bad to it, right? There's kind of this one side of it which is kind of more of the darker side of it where these guys are, there's some men that are using older women just for hookups, right? Or women using younger men just for hookups because they're not ready to get into anything real and so they just use each other for these kind of physical pleasures but there's a lot of guys that are legitimately more attracted to older women and it might be from a physical standpoint because I know guys that are physically more attracted to older women. From a statistics standpoint most men are far more attracted to younger women than they are to older women but some men are a lot more attracted to older women from a physical standpoint than they are to younger women but from an emotional standpoint a lot of guys find it way like a total relief to date older women because all of a sudden it's like they don't have to deal with all this nonsense a lot of younger women have no idea what's going on they're new to the world they're like, oh, I don't, you know like the guy has to kind of teach them all kinds of things and when you date an older woman it's like you don't have to teach her a whole lot of things, right? She's usually more financially stable she's usually knows what's going on she knows what she wants she knows what she doesn't want she knows how to communicate in a direct way with a guy usually, right? And so there's a lot of the nonsense that's removed out of the situation and so a lot of guys do it just because it's so much easier and they prefer it and it's a better relationship for them and we have tons of women that are in our community that are married to men who are much, much younger than them sometimes 10, 15, 20 years younger than them so I don't think it's necessarily a problem just go, you know, if you're in that situation make sure that you have your boundaries that you're setting things up properly make sure that you do all the things that I talk about in the forever woman program to make sure that you're setting yourself up for a great relationship and you're not getting used or any of that kind of stuff and you'll be fine if you're doing that. So Arsenia says, Matt, how to make him choose me over other women in his life and want to marry me? Well, first thing that I suggest that you do is go get the forever woman program because that is the program about how to do that. I mean, there's so many things that you, depending on where you are and what you're doing that you need to do or set up in order to be in a situation where you have a guy who wants to choose you over other women and marry you because you're setting yourself up in the right situation there's a lot of mistakes that women make and I have no idea about your situation because you're not telling me anything about your situation but there's mistakes that women make where, for instance, they hook up with a guy before kind of setting the right boundaries and having the exclusivity talk a lot of women don't get emotionally connected with a guy before they end up hooking up with them, right? Which kind of puts them into a bad situation or a lot of women will not have an abundance mindset going on and so they'll just be like totally latched on to this one dude and he'll feel it and he'll try to pull away and she just kind of like chases after them, right? And instead you need to be leaning back. There's a ton of different things that you need to do and my suggestion is that you go to the foreverwomanformula.com pick up my program there for free and just go over it like five, 10, 15 times and make sure that you really understand what's going on there and you do what I talk about in that program because that is your best chance at getting into the relationship that you want be it marriage it looks like in this situation. Darla asks how to get the forever woman program go to theforeverwomanformula.com That's what you do. Marinog says, hello, always watching your program. Well, thank you, I appreciate it. Isabel says, I get it, it makes sense I need to practice my alignment so difficult in our busy lives to focus on ourselves though. Yeah, I know and it's one of those things that there's a certain point where you need to get to, right? Where you look at your life and you're like, okay, what's important to me? And it's really easy in this day and age to get really sucked into this idea of I need to work all the time and I need to be busy all the time and so what ends up happening for a lot of women is they get so sucked into that that they totally blind themselves to some of the things that are really, really important to them. And if you do that, then what'll end up happening is weeks, months, years can end up going by and you never ended up creating a lot of the things that were really important to you and you get to a point where you're like, am I ever gonna do this? And so my suggestion is that you take some time out and just spend some time and go, okay, what's really important to me? And how can I shift things around in my life to make sure that I'm spending time on the things that are important and get the other things that are going on in your life to a place where that you can at least maintain them, right? I do this in my life all the time, right? If I want to work on my business, I might set things up in other areas of my life where I just maintain over there. For instance, like with my workouts or whatever, I work out all the time. It's like, okay, well, I work out, this is how I make sure that I'm working out. These are all the things that are set up. And then I just go and do workouts somewhere between two and five times a week depending on what's going on with me. And then that's taken care of and I can shift my focus over to my business and making it grow. Or if I want to focus on my health and I'm not eating well, or I figured out that something's wrong with me physically, I can set up my business so that everything's set up and moving along in a certain way so that I don't need to focus on that right now and I can shift my focus over. And I think it's important to do that, at least for guys, I know it's important because we're so single-minded and it's really difficult for me to juggle a whole bunch of balls. And if you're in the situation where it's difficult for you to juggle everything, then my suggestion is that you kind of put things into a maintenance mode and focus on one area at a time until you've developed that to a certain, to whatever the next level is, and then focus on the other things and make sure that you're not completely neglecting them and just do that over and over and over again until you've kind of built up a whole bunch of things in your life where you're really working on them. I hope that answered your question. Amanda says, how do you find places to just be friends with guys? Because I only seem to find guys, you think I am only good for one thing and I do not want to come off that way, why do I? Well, one thing, I don't know what your situation is, Amanda, but one thing that you have to realize is that men are kind of biologically driven to want to hook up. And so it might not be that, I'm not sure where you're meeting these guys, but it could or it could not be that they are interested in you and more things, but you're just seeing it as they wanna hook up because that's something that they're trying to do. And so a lot of women are like, well, we should just be friends first or all these kinds of things with guys. Well, guys have figured out that if they try to be friends first with you, that it's not gonna work out in their favor, right? They're never gonna get what they want, which is the relationship that they want. And so if you want to find guys that you just wanna be friends with, you need to make sure that you're not one doing it in scenarios where you're doing kind of a hookup, like an app thing or a dating site thing or whatever, where it's focused around dating, right? And if you meet guys through that where they're focused on dating, it's very, they shouldn't be just trying to be friends with you for the most part, unless they just don't have any friends or you guys just have some kind of crazy, weird, really good friend connection or something. What you should be doing instead is going to different places of things where you share values with people. So for instance, I love personal development. I absolutely love it. It's one of my favorite things in the world. I'm going to the Tony Robbins date with Destiny here in December, for instance. And there's gonna be, I'm guessing thousands of people at that event and I am gonna go and I'm sure I'll make some friends and meet some new people. And I do that all the time, right? Like for instance, we have different events where all the top kind of people that are in the dating space all go to those events. And so I go there and I meet a lot of the guys there like Michael Fiori and Amy North and Matthew Hussies been at some of them and Carlos Carvalho's been at him. And there's just tons and tons of people in the dating industry, big people in the dating industry that go to those events. And so I'll go and hang out and make friends with them. And my suggestion is that you find things where you share values with people at those events and you go and be a part of those things and do things where you go to group activities where you're just making a huge group of friends and just make sure that when you meet guys that you set boundaries and let them know how you feel if they try to kind of cross any of those boundaries and just be like, hey, look, I'm just looking to be friends here. And if you continue to do stuff like that, this friendship will fall to the ground pretty quickly. And I won't end up wanting to be around you. And so just make sure that you set things up correctly and that you do things where you go and find people that share similar values and it's not all about dating. So I hope that answered your question. Renette says, I need to know more of the healing process, please. Yeah, I will be talking all about that. Royale says, how to choose the right guy if a lot is pursuing you. You choose the right guy by the ones who step up and the ones who show you that they are going to do all the things that you need in order. So one is like, you look at the guys and you're like, okay, who am I most attracted to? Next, you look at where do we share the same values? How can I look at this guy and are we going to be growing together? Does he have a good relationship? You wanna find the best situation you can possibly be in. If you've got all kinds of guys and they're all pursuing you. One, you wanna do that steps up. Two, you wanna do that you're attracted to. Three, you want a guy who kind of has all the characteristics of what it is that you want in a man. So, does he take personal responsibility for himself? Is he supporting your growth as a woman and whatever it is that you're doing in your life? Is he developing himself and growing as a human being? Is he somebody who values and loves himself as well? Does he have long lasting friendships that he still has from years before, right? Because that tells you a lot about how he kind of connects with people and whether he can keep people in his life or not. How does he speak about his exes? Does he communicate directly and openly with you? Is he self-sufficient? Is he willing to be emotional and vulnerable with you? Is he self-reflective? You wanna look at all these things, right? Like that's, those are the green flags. Green, green for red flags. Yeah, those are the green flags that you wanna be looking for when you're seeing a man and is he stepping up and is he moving things forward with you? So, those are some of the things that you wanna look at. So, Sonia says, how can you value yourself when you get knocked down verbally? Well, you can value yourself by one, getting rid of people in your life who knock you down verbally, getting a support network of people that treat you really well, spend some time healing yourself, spend some time reframing your belief systems, spend some time creating a life that you really love and that you really care about, create something that you're really good at, right? The way to be confident is to get really good at something and it'll build your self-esteem because you look at yourself and you're like, I can see my value, right? Spend some time thinking about how you're a valuable, awesome, amazing person in your life and how you can give to other people, spend some time volunteering. There's a lot of different ways that you can value yourself even if you're getting knocked down verbally and the best way to do it is to spend time around other people who can see your value and treat you well and then making sure that you take some time to get in alignment with the way that other people see you because a lot of times people will see the value that you have even if you don't and it'll be difficult for them if you spend a lot of time around them and you don't see it, eventually they'll kind of push you away because they'll be like, she's kind of this person that is always in victim mode or whatever and so they won't want to be around you but if you work on yourself and you make sure that you're healing and moving forward and doing all that kind of stuff, they'll want you to be a part of their group. And so like I was talking about before, one of the great ways that you can do that is by joining personal development programs and being a part of those things. Judy says, if life was always easy, we wouldn't grow as well as have depth. Yeah, I mean, I'm a firm believer, I am a 100% firm believer in the idea that adversity creates strength. Adversity is what creates us to be the types of people that we want to be in our lives. And so I'm all about adversity. I'm all about having a life where I constantly run through and fail. I fail at things all the time. I'm a huge proponent of failing over and over and over again. You can ask Kalena about that. I don't mind failing because that's what allows me to grow. And I'm guessing, Judy, maybe you're talking about Sonya above, I don't know. Anyway, Beverly says, how do you know when a guy is real online or just using you? Well, it depends on what you're talking about in terms of whether he's real or just using you. If you're talking about a scammer, I did a whole video on that, a whole live stream on that. But basically what you wanna do is make sure that you, one, aren't getting used at all. So don't ever send anybody money ever that's online ever. Two, make sure that you're doing video chat with people. If they have any excuse why they can't do video chat, just cut them off completely and never talk to them again. And three, make sure that you are coming from a space of abundance because if you're coming from a space of abundance, then you won't be so worried about this one dude that you're meeting online and you'll be more interested in having the relationship that you actually want. So Alexandra says, absolutely, I'm ready and my mind is open to whatever we talked about it. And he said that he wants the same. Well, in reality, he doesn't really show the same point of view, it hurts. Okay. Sue says, can long distance relationships work? Absolutely. I'm gonna be doing some videos here on long distance relationships, probably pretty soon. And I'm also gonna be putting together a program for it as well. Christine says, younger men for older women, it's happening more, they are very attractive to me. Awesome. Excuse me. Isabel says, been single by choice for nearly five years now. Where do I start in getting myself ready to meet a high value guy? What would you advise are the first steps? I will be looking at your forever woman program after your broadcast. Well, like I said, that is the first step because that program goes through everything that you need to know in order to get into an amazing relationship that you wanna be in. I mean, there's so many different things that I could sit here and talk to you about in terms of what you should be doing to get yourself ready. But like I was talking about in the actual program, my suggestion is that you focus on creating alignment within yourself of believing that you're an amazing, valuable, worthwhile human being because when you're coming from that space, all of a sudden it's so much easier to get into the relationship that you wanna have. And it's so much easier when you go out there regardless of how you go out and meet people. And my suggestion personally is that you go out and meet men offline in the real world because those are some of the most amazing men that you'll meet who aren't in the hookup culture. And so my suggestion is that you do that. But I mean, yeah, I mean, if you go through that program you'll have more than enough content to figure out what you're doing and how to be ready to attract the right guy. Just go through that program. My suggestion is that you go through the program at least 10 times. It just to like really get into your subconscious mind, what you should be doing and how you should be interacting with men. It's completely changed so many women's lives. So make sure that you go and do that. Sissy says, hi Matt, got here late, new haircut, looking good, big brother. Yeah, yeah, I got a haircut. So what do we got here? Ann says, I would like to be treated like a lady, not just so they can get into my panties. Well, I would hope that you want to be treated like a lady. So Anissa, Patty says such good advice. Anissa says, hi, thank you for your genuine manner of explaining and analysis men and women's psychology and behavior. You are absolutely welcome. Anissa says, how a man fall in love. I'm actually gonna be doing a whole live stream on how men fall in love here pretty soon, but basically it takes time, right? There's two different ways that a lot of women think that a man falls in love. There's one which is kind of this initial biological drive thing, which a lot of men confuse with the feeling of being in love. And what they will do is they will promise you the world when they first meet you and come on really, really strong. And they think that's love. Women think that's love. That's not love. What love is is a deep emotional connection that builds over time. And basically what you need to do, really what you need is the forever woman program and just to make sure that you're allowing, I look at it like a flame, right? Like building a fire. And basically you need to start the fire, right? Like build it and you start with twigs and stuff. If you ever built a fire, you know what I'm talking about. You build it with twigs at first and you light it and you have to give it oxygen, right? You can't smother it, which is what a lot of women do as soon as they feel those feelings, they jump on a man and smother him. You wanna do the opposite. You want to build the fire, but you also wanna give it space and give it oxygen and room to breathe so that it can grow. And over time you put more and more, you know, a little bit bigger logs, little bit bigger twigs on it until it becomes logs. And then eventually you have this huge fire that's raging that's really, really difficult to burn out and or to smother. And so it's a lot easier once you have that fire roaring to do a lot more things than if you're in a situation where, you know, it's a little fire and it's just a little bit of kindle and you do a bunch of things and you just smother it, right? Which is what a lot of women in our community end up doing. And so you wanna be in a situation where you're giving him space and you're giving him room. And I talk a lot about that, not only in the forever woman program, but there's also a live stream on here where I talk about how to lean back to get a guy to chase you. My suggestion is that you go and check out that video in particular. Mandy says, hey, your advice is amazing. Thank you, I appreciate it. Patty says, I went to a power dating event last night. Good idea and concept to get out there. Yep, you can do that. Patty says, face to face is better. I absolutely agree. Julie Tree says, please do the LDR, Matt. I need some good advice. Need some good advice, Julie Tree. Well, okay. All right, so that's it for this video. Thank you so much for being here. Again, make sure that if you have been watching my stuff and you really like what I'm talking about and you wanna support me and you want my whole system on how to attract a great guy and get into a great relationship, make sure that you go to theforeverwomanformula.com. You can get my whole system there for free. Go check it out, theforeverwomanformula.com. Remember, I'm here to help inspire and empower you and give you the tools necessary to attract a great, amazing guy and get into a relationship where you feel loved and seen and cherished by the guy that you want in your life. And so that's what we're doing here. I hope that you subscribe to the channel. You like our Facebook page. I've got a podcast that you can go check out now. It's called theforeverwomanpodcast. You can just Google it or find it on iTunes or Spotify or whatever your favorite podcasting situation is out there. So thank you so much for being here. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your journey. I think that you're absolutely amazing and we have some of the best, most amazing women as a part of our community here. So thank you so much for being here. I think that you are absolutely amazing and I will speak with you again here soon. Thanks for being here. Talk to you later. Bye-bye.