 Hey survivors and frivers, in this video I am going to be talking about how the narcissist wants to make you suffer, this is likely to be quite a triggering video and may upset you, but I think it's important that you hear this, please like, comment, share and subscribe. If you would like to donate, my PayPal link is in the video description. If you are interested in one-on-one coaching, you can email me at Narcisfivecoaching at gmail.com Narcisfive Immersion Dice is available on our Teespring page. If you are interested in purchasing your own Narcisfive T-shirt or mug, the link is in the video description. The narcissist wants to make you suffer. The narcissist wants you to experience or be subjected to something bad or unpleasant. They want to watch you experience highly unpleasant physical sensations. They want to torture you. Many of their actions or behaviors involve inflicting severe pain on their victims as a form of punishment or to force them to say or do something. They want you to experience severe physical, mental or emotional suffering and they want to watch your experience. They want to watch you going through it. Sometimes they can be careless and push someone over the edge to the point where they cannot come back. This could be due to severe physical torture where the victim loses their life or it could be from mental or emotional suffering where the victim develops psychosis. But most narcissists will take note of your pain threshold. They will study your past experiences and how your brain or physical body responds to suffering in the present moment. This helps them to identify your pain threshold. So most narcissists will understand the magnitude or intensity, the measurable amount of force that must be exceeded for a certain reaction, result or condition to occur or to be manifested. Many narcissists are sadists. They do get off on your pain and suffering. They derive pleasure, excitement and even sexual gratification from inflicting pain or humiliation on others. They get pleasure from intentionally causing you pain or suffering, spoiling or ruining an opportunity or a chance of success. They do not feel any concern about it unless it could be potentially fatal. Even then, the concern is not for you. It is more about how they could potentially lose their source of supply. Narcists want you to experience an extreme state of disturbance, confusion, uncertainty or lack of order. They want to torture you to a point where you can no longer probably assess what is going on or where you are close to death just so they can resuscitate you or revive you from the unconsciousness or apparent death, make you active again and able to experience the pain or suffering all over again. In a perfect world, they would receive great satisfaction from repeating this process an indefinite number of times or until you are no longer able to function or perceive the world around you. Of course, some narcissists have made this a reality and acted it out in real life due to their poor impulse control. Most narcissists understand the consequences of doing this in real life, but that doesn't stop them from finding alternative methods of achieving the same satisfaction or thrill. They find covert passive aggressive ways of inflicting mental or emotional pain on you. It is more difficult for the outside world to detect but still gives them the opportunity to cause you to experience an extreme state of disturbance, confusion, uncertainty or lack of order as empaths or highly sensitive people. When we hurt someone, we might experience guilt, remorse or other feelings of distress. It is very different for sadistic emotional predators like narcissists. When the narcissist causes or observes a person's suffering, it provides them with some form of emotional benefit or a sense of reward. They have a natural motivation to inflict suffering on other people, even going out of their way or at a personal cost. Narcissists will target specific situations where they can exploit, humiliate or take advantage of people for their own personal pleasure. There is a link between sadistic traits and aggressive behavior. Narcissists will use aggression to provoke fear within their victims. It provides them with an initial feeling of pleasure or reward, but then they begin to feel negative emotions as they start to reflect on their shame. Narcissists do not want to reflect on their shame as it is painful for them, so they will try to distract themselves by seeking more pleasure or reward and causing more pain and suffering in their victim. The pleasure or sense of reward motivates them to repeat these sadistic, aggressive behaviors. The more they repeat these behaviors, the more it reinforces and promotes a larger pattern of sadism or aggressive behavior within them. It becomes a part of their character and personality. It becomes a lifestyle as they sink deeper and deeper in addiction. Narcissists assume the dominant role to release their feelings of frustration or resentment, and then for once they feel like they are in control. They take pride in causing you pain or suffering, spoiling or ruining your opportunities or chance of success. They see them as achievements, something to be proud of. They are pathologically envious and jealous of you, and this makes them want to watch you suffer even more because in their minds you are causing them pain by being who you are or having the qualities, talents or positive traits which you possess. They want to destroy everything good about you until you don't even know who you are anymore because they are envious and jealous. They can't possess your qualities, talents or positive traits. They can't have what you have or get what you get, so now they want to destroy you. Your presence makes them feel worthless and insignificant. They compare themselves to you and then feel like they are nothing in comparison. Then they feel intense negative emotions such as hate, anger, envy and jealousy, frustration, resentment and shame. They experience pain from dealing with these emotions. It is overwhelming for them. They try to release these emotions by dominating the situation, taking control of you and then limiting or restricting anything that you might otherwise achieve or obtain which would then cause them further pain or emotional distress. Of course the reality is that they are not really in control and while their dominant behaviour may initially release their feelings of frustration or resentment it only makes them experience more shame. Where does this sadistic behaviour come from? I believe that at some point in their lives they experience some form of pain or trauma. It is likely to be more than just one experience and these experiences cause the narcissist to experience some form of pain or trauma by people who may have been sadists, maybe they took pleasure from it, maybe they even smiled or laughed at the narcissist or maybe they didn't intend to cause the narcissist any harm. Either way the narcissist assumed that this was intentionally designed to hurt them. No one was around to comfort the narcissist or validate what they had experienced. Maybe all the narcissist needed at that time was a hug or someone to tell them that they are going to be okay and that person was wrong for doing what they did or maybe they didn't intend to hurt them just someone to validate what they had experienced. Followed by some form of security or comfort the narcissist received no security or comfort. Maybe they were told that they were weak or they deserve to experience the pain. From that point on the narcissist learned a few things. There is nothing wrong with intentionally causing another person pain or suffering. You can find pleasure or excitement in causing or observing someone's pain. They don't have to validate or comfort victims following a painful or traumatic experience or they can pretend as though they don't even notice the pain or suffering that they are causing their victim. You can tell how a person is thinking or feeling by observing their actions or behaviors. By observing a narcissist out of control or aggressive actions or behaviors it is obvious that they have experienced severe pain and suffering throughout their lives and while I can feel or express sympathy for someone who has experienced something like this at a certain point in your life you should develop some level of awareness of how your out of control or aggressive actions and behaviors are affecting people. Remember narcissism is a choice. They choose to act and behave in this way. They act dominant or as though they are in control but their actions or behaviors demonstrate nothing but weakness and inferiority. Remember you can you can tell how a person is thinking or feeling by observing their actions or behaviors. The narcissist actions or behaviors demonstrate that they are experiencing hatred, anger, envy and jealousy, frustration, resentment and shame. The truth is they are too weak to reflect on these emotions and deal with them. Instead they choose to project them onto other people so so that they can express those emotions for them. Only weak people engage in these types of behaviors. The narcissist wants to make you suffer to distract themselves from their own suffering. They want to keep you in a state where they are able to control your emotions or the level of disturbance, confusion, uncertainty or lack of order that you may experience. This is done by restricting or limiting necessities which may affect your energy levels or emotional regulation such as food, water, sleep and shelter. Doing certain actions or behaviors that may provoke fear, disturbance or confusion within you. Isolating you so that you have no intervalidate your experience or comfort you. Using manipulation tactics such as denial, projection, blame shifting, gaslighting and a double bind so that they do not have to validate your experience which they can then use to further control you. A lot of this revolves around control and regulating their emotions. When you present yourself to them, when they have to witness your progress or success, your qualities, talents and positive traits, it triggers them to reflect on how they don't have that level of progress or success. They don't possess those qualities, talents or positive traits. When they have to witness you doing what you want to do or living how you want to live, it triggers them to reflect on how they don't get to do what they want to do. They don't get to live how they want to live. This causes them to feel intense hatred, anger, envy and jealousy towards you. They become frustrated and resentful to release these emotions. They have to abuse you again and again before they abuse you. They start thinking about it and it gives them a feeling of excitement or anticipation and then when they finally do the action or behavior, they initially get a feeling of pleasure or reward. However, the more they do it, the less pleasurable and rewarding the action or behavior becomes. They begin to feel empty and dissatisfied. They are left to reflect on their frustration, resentment and shame. This pushes them into an endless cycle where they are constantly repeating the same actions and behaviors expecting a different result. When all it does is cause them to feel more and more frustration and resentment towards you. As in their minds, you are not able to give them the feeling that they desire or crave but at the same time they need you. They are dependent on you like a drug. The more they repeat these behaviors, the more it reinforces and promotes a larger pattern of sadism or aggressive behavior within them. It becomes a part of their character and personality. It becomes a lifestyle as they sink deeper and deeper into addiction. Never getting out, years of their lives go by and at some point they might wake up and realize that they have just wasted their entire lives on pointless meaningless actions or behaviors which resulted in nothing but wasted time. They never experience real life, real relationships, empathy, compassion, connection by the time they realize it. They feel that it's too late for them to start working on those qualities now. They would rather take that red pill and go back into the matrix never experiencing what life is really about. Thank you for watching. I hope this video resonated with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. If you would like to make a donation, my PayPal link is in the video description. Coaching inquiries, you can email me at Narcisfivecoaching at gmail.com. Don't forget to check out the Narcisfive merchandise store. We have some really cool designs on our t-shirts and mugs. The link is in the video description. Thank you for watching and I will talk to you soon.