 Not every Batman movie and spin-off is good. In fact, some of these downrights suck and today I'm going to talk about the worst of the bunch and on this ongoing comic book movie feud one of these moves on to the Phase 2 down the road. I understand it's unfair that one of these terrible movies has to make it down this list But like any great talent competition some of the shit needs to move on to keep things interesting. Fire up the Mr. Freeze pun counter. Let's get started on another movie feud. Here's something fun right off the bat right right off the bat every one of these films replace one of its lead characters Batman forever couldn't secure Michael Keaton as Batman once Tim Burton left his director What we got was a lesser performance from Val Kilmer Batman and Robin had to switch things up again with George Clooney in the role I know the Cloonster has gone on record multiple times talking about how bad he was as Batman So I'm gonna chill on giving him too much flak about it. I mean it was awful though zero fucks were given Hi freeze. I'm Batman. Just casual just casual about it Then there's Michelle Pfeiffer who got iced as Catwoman in a standalone film Halle Berry puts on the leather suit in a celebrated Razzie Award performance, then there's Suicide Squad Obviously Ledger couldn't reprise his roles the Joker so Jared Leto put on the makeup and had to go at it His performance in snow way shape or form compares to what Ledger brought to the table It seems like he couldn't make up his mind and what kind of Joker he wanted to play So he just took variations of all of them and spit it out Batman forever is probably the best lineup of actors Jim Kerry As the Riddler may have been a bit too Joker-esque, but he was at least entertaining to watch Tommy Lee Jones's two-faced. However, it just came off as overly cheesy doesn't help that his makeup looks like it was Airbrushed on by a cat trying to get a toy off his paw the audience expected a certain tone and feel from this film And frankly it was left in the cold 90s vagethrob Chris O'Donnell plays the boy wonder pretty well honestly Nicole Kibman is our damsel in distress And we have a small can you have sorts from Drew Barrymore just because I guess Batman and Robin took everything We hated about forever and magnified him times a thousand I will say one nice thing about director Joel Schumacher He knows how to bring in a star studded cast and then strip away all their credibility due to a terrible script in poor Direction since Batman Returns apparently made it a requirement for Batman movies to have two villains We do it for a third time Arnold Schwarzenegger plays mr. Freeze in the campiest way possible. What killed the dinosaurs the ice age The sexy Yuma Thurman bodes much better as poison ivy since she's so damn fine in her little outfits her performance means very little in my eyes It was ice to see Chris O'Donnell back Did I do this ice pun counter for a frozen episode already? It doesn't matter Alicia Silverstone decides to jump into the fray this time around using heavy amounts of Crisco to get into her tight Asked Batgirl outfit Man, I love those bad nipples not on her as her costume didn't have any but on Chris O'Donnell's and George Clooney's Those were the icing on the cake cat woman doesn't have a lot going for it in the acting department Sharon Stone puts out a fun B movie performance as the villain of the picture. No idea what her character's name is IMDB says Laurel So let's go with that suicide squad as an avalanche of characters and it's a case of quantity over quality in this movie Margot Robbie is the standout is Harley Quinn She did a pretty damn good job with the terrible script She was handed Viola Davis got a lot of time as Amanda Waller playing a no-nonsense cutthroat agent I'm not sure what her official title is within the organization, but she's a shit boss that much is certain The other characters are almost not worth going into because there's so little development The backstories are silly three minutes long and clumsily written we can talk more about that though in story coming up now So stay frosty ice, man It's a pun and a movie reference. It's a double feature A great cast of characters can only take you so far when your script is total garbage Batman forever probably fairs the best here an ex-employee Edward nigma is bitter about being let go He creates a brain-sucking weapon and buddies up with the former district attorney Harvey Dent aka two face The film also weaves in Robin's tragic backstory about how he loses his parents the same way most of us will In a freak circus accident Batman and Robin isn't so much a story as it is a learning exercise And how not to make a superhero film step one don't drown your sets in high neon colors step two Don't give your heroes nonsensical weapons their shoes turn into hockey skates Terrific step three chill out on the product placement Although I am impressed that the bad card isn't a visa or mastercard. It's a goth card step four Don't ever go full Clooney. Hey freeze. I'm Batman. Come on oceans Let's take this guy out step five. You know what no no more steps. This could go on for an eternity I'm moving on. I will say this cat woman and Batman and Robin are so stupid They're fun as hell to watch cat woman is the story of a female protagonist Patience Phillips being in the wrong place at the wrong time Although the events to follow do turn her into a sexy badass fighter So maybe right place right time this cosmetics graphic designer over here is a startling Conversation about one of the makeup lines and is then flushed down a giant conduit pipe me ouch, right? I'm switching the pun counter over to cat related ones meow. We cool with that All right, I'm doing both I guess I'm doing both cat women's resurrected the same way all women are in my fantasies via tongue bath Granted it's from an Egyptian cat and not Kate Beckinsale, but I digress perks of her new abilities include fighting skills cat Communication costume making better hygiene and easier meals got milk Suicide Squad tells the horrific tale of a studio that went through multiple rewrites reshoots and editors and the outcome is a gigantic mess Amanda Waller puts together some sort of suicide squad Her intentions are to bring together a task force in case Superman goes evil or a different large threat comes to town It's a pretty solid plan bring together some of the worst people on earth that can't be trusted to band together to fight a Common enemy that they cannot possibly defeat Okay, so maybe it's not a mental thing that'll win the day But surely they have strength in numbers and they have their own set of unique skills that are ripe for the job Like Harley Quinn. She has a baseball bat or boomerang. He has a boomerang or katana She has a come on I just don't get how any of this makes sense right out of the gates dead shot has some actual skill And seems pretty cool. He's the cat's meow for sure The first mission as a team is to stop some ancient being from destroying the planet Batman Wonder Woman flash and the others must have Been on sabbatical side plot sees Joker doing everything he can to get Harley back They love each other Amanda Waller told me that through narration and a two-minute backstory that sees Harley Quinn as a Professional psychiatrist who falls in love with him for reasons that are never told why bother That would be counterproductive to the shitty movie that Warner Brothers is so desperately trying to make and they achieved at doing it And just like any good relationship he tortures her a little for good measure and throws her in a vat of chemicals I don't have much more to say nothing nice is coming out of this the villain uses twerking in the final act She forgot all her other abilities and they take her down pretty easily. Let's go to round three It's funny that the trailers for suicide squad had that same look and feel the colors the neon the vibrance That Batman and Robin had that we couldn't stand yet It worked in those previews because the movie looked like it was having a lot of fun That's not what we got though Sure They tried to pretend like the movie was always going to be fun laying deadpool-esque verbiage and jokes on top But most could tell this was not the plan from day one and it was forced in and editing Batman Forever and Batman and Robin Are really bad looking movies the aesthetic the bold colors the clearly staged settings are laughable most of the time At least they have terrific scores from composer Elliot Goldenthal There are hints of Danny Elfman in the theme yet. They are set far enough apart to stand alone I want to give a special shout out to the fantastic Batman Forever soundtrack Which had you to method man the offspring and of course the masterpiece by seal kiss from a rose Now that your roses in bloom It's the gloom Speaking of killer soundtrack suicide squad has probably 80 songs in its movie That that's at a minimum. There's a little something for everyone the music and Catwoman matches the quality of the film Let me pair it with a fine set of dance moves from some other famous people that made themselves look like idiots The action and effects and Catwoman are by far the best part for me I'm a sucker for when the film jumps between live-action to CGI then back again They did this in the Matrix Reloaded they did this in blade to they did this in Hellboy to much better effect Suicide Squad has stuff being blown up and I think I counted three helicopter crashes all necessary The Batman movies action are all early 90s Saturday morning cartoon level bad. This needs to be done now Let's conclude In hindsight I should have put a unsubscribe counter at the bottom of this video and every time I bashed on suicide squad The number would drop because we live in a world now kids where if you say anything mean or criticize a film You're biased or you just hate movies in general or something else to that effect Fuck forbid if you just don't think the movies good on its own merits and some people say well You know what there's real people that worked hard on that film damn it. Well, they did get paid They'll be okay, but let's move on to what does matter and that's this comic book movie bracket You vote the winner of these four shitty movies goes on to a later round where they will then be eliminated because these movies all suck For me the winner is Batman forever. It's not terrible. It's it's silly. It's stupid, but it's got enough entertainment value Alright, thanks for watching and remember. This is more than just reviews. This is movie feuds Hey Trish, why don't you play me some copyright infringed hip-hop so I can walk myself out? Suicide Squad style I Remains a drug that's the high enough appeal But did you know that when it snows? My eyes become large and the light that you shine can't be seen