 Get this and get it straight crime is a suckers road and those who travel it wind up in the gutter the prison of the grave This time it was a fishy horse play from a red-headed beauty Past the black bearded sailor to a neck-and-neck finish over a wandering seahorse worth fifty thousand bucks That was the jockey happened like this From the Pan of Raymond Chandler outstanding author of crime fiction comes his most famous character in The Adventures of Philip Marlowe Now with Gerald Moore starred as Philip Marlowe. We bring you tonight's exciting story the seahorse jockey You know it's tomorrow when you came in today. I said to myself. I said it's a funny thing You've been getting your haircuts here now for six seven years, but I never found out how you vote Republican or Democrat? Well, I like to think that's my Another thing that never did you tell me if you're for the Marshall plan or against the Marshall plan Well the Marshall plan and for the California's governor next fall. Well, there's no doubt in my mind Sit back. Yeah now now the income tax is fair or it's not fair. Well eminently I'll come I'll come all this stuff. I don't know what is your opinion? I can't imagine of course my opinion I tell people I say political party is a matter of getting Saved by the bell Oh Alvin's barbershop Alvin speaking. Oh Mr. Marlowe, yeah, he's right here, but hold on please it's for you. Mr. Marlowe always interruption It's all right the 60 would never mind. Hey, hello This is Mrs. Lola Demarest speaking. Oh goodness. I've finally located you now You're to come out to my place at once Pacific Palisades 1312 old Tower Road and your plane leaves in tomorrow Now wait a minute what plane this is Demarest. Why what's this all about the seahorse? I'm going to sell it. Mr. Marlowe my mind's made up the sea witch Well, look Mrs. Demarest. I can hear it alone Mrs. Demarest no service. I've got one question Were you ever a barber Alvin? It looks like we'll have to skip that shave Opinions are important. Oh sure. I mean the way I look at it. Mr. Marlowe Alvin Wipe the leather off your chin not mine Pacific Palisades my new clients home at 1312 old Town Road was 40 minutes from LA The house was Victorian style solid made of wood two stories high and squatted close to the edge of a sunbaked cliff 200 feet above the ocean I Parked behind what must have been the first pierce arrow ever made and started slowly along a gravel path that led to the rear Until I heard it Inside I found an old woman and I figured to be my client leaning against the half open kitchen door sobbing and punching at the gingham apron she wore like it would keep her from screaming again Mrs. Demarest get hold of yourself. What happened? I'm the poor darling She's dead My name's Philip Marlowe. Mrs. Demarest hired me an hour ago an hour ago She was a handsome woman You're the detective aren't you about the brooch? Yeah How this happened Mrs. Lockfield miss Bertie Lockfield miss Lockfield. Were you with her? No? I came over a bit ago. I'm Lola's best friend, you know her only friend I came over in my car to cook her some dinner like I do all the time I live right by the little cottage at the foot of old Tower Road the one with the tall The dinner miss Lockfield you were saying. Oh, yes. Well Mr. Marlowe can we go back to the living? Oh sure sure Now miss Lockfield you came over to cook dinner then what well I looked in on her first like I do all the time and since she was asleep I went to the kitchen and set things going and then oh here you better sit down Then I went back to my place first around for 10 maybe 20 minutes, then I came here again And found what we just saw that pillow clenched in one hand like she'd wanted All right. All right. Take it easy miss Lockfield try to hold on, huh? Now tell me you didn't happen to see anything of the new lawyer around did you? New lawyer? Why Lola didn't mention a new lawyer He was due here today. Yeah, a half hour ago Might help if we knew his name. Why mr. Marlowe? Mr. Marlowe Sure, do you don't think there was Well foul play. I don't know miss Lockfield But for one thing the position of the pillow seems kind of cock-eyed to me. Yes, but who on earth would want to? Oh, no not jelly and it couldn't be. Mrs. Demaris was quite clear about Jillian Jillian hated Lola mr. Marlowe, but Jillian isn't a Killer well, maybe nobody's been killed, but tell me miss Lockfield to this stepdaughter this Jillian know that she was getting the money from the brooch. Oh, no I doubted very much. Although she did know that Lola had it of course and And what and that Lola's money was dwindling mr. Marlowe and that she was selling her possessions one by one Therefore Jillian might think that the seahorse brooch was hers by right of inheritance. Yes Yeah Tell me miss Lockfield. Do you know where mrs. Demaris kept the brooch? Oh, yes in the bedroom I'll show you exactly where all right It's behind the portrait of mr. Demaris dinner Take it easy, honey, huh? Did you say behind a portrait that one? There's a panel in the wall that slides Move the picture to your right mr. Marlowe You'd better use the chair. Yeah to the right and out on the panel edging, huh? This velvet case Mr. Marlowe, don't you see it? No, and I don't think I will Miss Lockfield the velvet case is all there is the seahorse is gone I called the law and reported both the theft of the brooch and the death of mrs. Demaris While birdie lockfield prompted over my shoulder After that I started through the place looking for anything that could possibly give me a lead on the wandering seahorse 15 minutes later all I could show for my effort was a telephone number surfside 10229 And nothing to me except it was written on a sheet of brown roll your own cigarette paper When I dialed the number and got no answer I dropped the paper into my pocket I told miss Lockfield to wait for the police and I headed for town on the first public phone booth. I Started through the local classified directory looking for a lawyer named Elmer Paris. I Didn't find in my thing. It could be somebody's junior partner. So I began at the top. I Scored on my seventh nickel called her Kramer and McDuff. It was the anchor man who answered One I was fired by mrs. Lola Demarest early today mrs. McDuff All right objection sustained tell me where can I get in touch with mr. Paris The answer you just gave me now one last item mr. McDuff did your firm supply a new lawyer for mrs. Demarest late today And sir, we never will oh each lawyer in this office is first the gentleman second a competent barrister Mrs. Demarest has used for neither good day, sir That I checked Elmer Paris off my list and went back to the phone book Jillian Demarest my late client stepdaughter was listed at number 111 Los Amigos Terrace Which a map on the back of the book showed to be just off Sunset Boulevard in Hollywood The girl herself replete with old-fashioned the only thing that was Was red-headed? Maybe 30 and meat and potato curves in either direction From a waistline that was strictly Rye crisp of a lettuce leaves Sit down What's your problem? Well, I got some bad news mr. Demarest don't tell me It's my income tax. I've been caught lying. It's your stepmother. She's dead Jill. Oh That's too bad Yeah, well try not to go to pieces kid. Look, I didn't particularly like Lola Demarest She didn't particularly like me So why make a thing of it because the seahorse brooch has been stolen Okay, don't try brushing that off because it was supposed to be sold today with the proceeds to go to you You're a liar private detective Hire Jill to fly the brooch to a San Francisco dealer and I found out it's really worth $50,000 a lot of dough you didn't expect Okay, mr. Private detective that last crack it means exactly what you could have taken the brooch yourself Surfside one or two to nine stop pushing and start listening if Lola intended to sell the brooch and give me the money It was for one reason only my father wanted it that way so So do I Know that you're without a client Maybe you'll work for me. I doubt it. I write and get paid well 5,000 words a month for a pope magazine Torrid story it figures He's off nicely. He's worth your while You want to help me? Suppose you're lying and actually stole the brooch yourself. What then? Then you handcuffed me to the nearest cop and run for mayor on the let's clean up local crime ticket now Is it a deal for say 1% of the 50,000 if I get it Zero if I don't 500 a font Okay, Jill, it's a deal and for a starter do you happen to know who Mrs. Demeris new lawyer was I didn't know the old one had been fired. I didn't say he had Could have quit you know nobody ever quit working for Lola Demeris. It wasn't her nature No, will you please stop barking at me and go out and bite the guy with the brooch? You look like you could do a good job of it For 500 bucks. Yeah But just think of the opposition Jill It's snapping at 50 grand I drove back to the foot of old Tower Road in the smothered knifey cottage labeled miss birdie Lockfield I started for the front door, but only got halfway Nicely right where you are. Oh fine You're a friend of Bertie Lockfields or a relative which a nephew why because Nephew aunt Bertie's not home and I want someone responsible to leave a message with so you go looking for him with a gun I listen baby. I and try to remember this Tell your aunt that the new lawyer Mrs. Demeris hired will be in touch with her. Does that make any sense to you? No, maybe if I knew his name it would I doubt it Now nephew without any fuss. Let me have your car and now wait a minute. What come on? You'll find your car a block away from here where I left mine Give no Happy motoring. Thank you nephew and don't forget the message She backed away gun into my car and started it without once taking a dead fish cold gray eyes off me When she jerked away from the kerb it was too late for me to do anything, but swear and start walking to my car Was where she said it would be so I got in and sulked as far as the first public telephone It was time to try Surfside one oh two two nine again. Hello. I'd like to I'd like to talk Wait a minute, is that you Lutata Matthews? Yeah, that's right Demeris case, huh? Well Phil the coroner thinks it was murder all right suffocated her with a pillow But they won't be sure till the autopsy report is it wait a minute Matthews. Hey wait a minute. Well, you're at Surfside one oh two two nine, right? Yeah, you got this number from homicide, didn't you? No, I didn't I got it from a brown cigarette paper I found it mrs. Demeris. I look tell me Matthews. What have you gotten? Where are you? 51 South Monroe place. It's a dead one Phil a guy who sported a beard the name was Paul Crater Occupation lawyer, right? No In just a moment the second act of Philip Marlowe, but first Dr. Christian's latest patient comes up with a new problem for the kindly small town physician this Wednesday And it's the case of a man who's about to be evicted from the place to which he's come home to die Add to this the patient is an exceedingly lively rip roaring centurion and you have the makings of a highly dramatic amusing yarn Dr. Christian starring Jean Herschelt is heard every Wednesday on most of the same CBS station Now with our star Gerald Moore the second act of Philip Marlowe in tonight's story the seahorse jockey I Was 30 minutes getting out to the address Matthews had given me Neighborhood around Surfside looked like it had been pushed together from scraps It washed in from the sea And number 51 Monroe place was no improvement It was a corroded little frame house surrounded by a picket fence most of its front teeth missing I Parked in the red glare from the squad cars spotlight as I walked past the sagging gate. I could hear Matthews inside Hello Marlowe come on in but don't fall over the late mr. Paul Crater there. Oh, that's him I don't look much like a sailor to me Matthews in spite of his whiskers What do you expect Bell Bonham trousers? All right, all right those guys wear suits when they're short like anyone else He was shot twice fell once in the stomach once in the chest drop right here in front of the door, huh? Yeah, the way it looks somebody came up and knocked and one crater opened the door They let him have it got a line on it. Well, it was a nice quiet guy apparently Lived here with the sister Helen as far as we know they got along fine We're still trying to locate her he worked around here someplace, but we don't know where yet But what about their Demeris business? Oh that? Well, I wait a minute. Oh, okay Matthews Yeah, money I As in J. U. G No, you come on back, I'll check them later personally Well film that answers one question anyway crater here worked out of a boatyard on front street What was that Nolan J. U. G. Abad jug Nolan? He's the bird who runs the shipyard. Oh, Mooney says he's a genuine old sea dog from roll your arms to Say roll your arms. Yeah Matthews, how about letting me talk to this Nolan before you and the boys move in why I'd like to check the color of his cigarette papers And I'll let you know. Well, okay, Milo only keep your chin in Maybe Nolan doesn't know anything about what happened a crater here unless he pulled the trigger, huh? I drove through the thick smell of seaweed dead fish that was front straight for 10 blocks Before I found a battered sign that read Nolan's Dangled over the door to a shanty of an office behind witcher Tangle of crooked mass stuck up like jack straws out of a jam of crusty hoax I pulled into the curb across the street from the place and started to get out The office door opened and a man who looked something left over from Moby Dick stepped out Headed across in my direction As he passed in front of my car. I got a good look at the butt of the homemade cigarette Drooping over a jaw as heavy as the end of an anchor Was rolled with brown paper Arts on it had to be jug Nolan when he swung on down the street and finally went into a bar. I followed Hey, sweet do it again, huh? It's not to it. I got a good Well, what do you make of it mate something biting you not exactly jug I was just wondering how well you're acquainted with Lola Demarest Demarest. Yeah Well enough to know she's got vinegar in her veins instead of blood. Why the old crack plot something to you She was my client earlier tonight. I'm a private detective names Molo. I'll keep it You're up to see her today. I'd like to know why go ask her. That's a little tough now. She's dead. Yeah Well, better late than ever mate. Mr. Do you I can stand the strain? What's your business with her boats? Sure. It wasn't seahorses. Don't talk bills to me, mate I said boats to rusty rotten scows covered with barnacles enough to sink him another week But to hear that old gal talk, you think each one was the Queen Mary. Hey, sweet. Yeah, pour me that drink Okay, okay What's yours, mr. Scott's Johnny Walker take them both out of this. Oh, yeah, don't I'll buy my own And I'm tired of your questions mate. So all out. Yes, we suit yourself Maybe you can bear up on one more question Nolan for you. Maybe it's easy. Who killed Paul Crater What was that? Somebody put two bullets in Paul Crater in front door of his house. I just came from there Oh dad If you're lying to me, mate, I'll tear you into get your hands off junk Why would I lie the cops know who did it? Not yet, but they will I'll find out about this and in a hurry slow down Nolan, there's no rush It is gonna be dead a long time. I want to ask it out of my way. Look Nolan. I said I wanted to Never mind. Okay, Commodore. I help yourself Oh Lynn's ponderous right fist was cocked when I changed my mind, but that wasn't what did it over his shoulder I'd spotted a familiar face Detective Lieutenant Matthews leaning at the end of the bar and studying his thumbnail intently as Jug stamp past him and out the door Matthews jerked the intriguing thumb at a thin sandy man working a pinball machine Who suddenly lost all interest in the game and left abruptly and Matthews sidled down the bar toward me Sorry to step on your heels there But we found out that Nolan has two judgments against him for assault that a very dangerous temporary I'll just save me a split lip. Do you hear all of it enough to convince me that jug Nolan didn't do it But we'll tag him just to play safe now chances are he's heading for craters house now Which should just give me a good chance to go to his place and look around. I'll see you Marlon. Yeah, so long Matthew Something else for you, mr. Oh, thanks, weed unless you can tell me why so many surfside sailors grow van dykes I wondered myself, maybe it's to hide those dirty collars. I don't know Hey, here's one would have been an armist and why don't you ask him? Oh, it's not better Okay, all right say do sick this fella. He wants to know why you sailors go those chin whiskers. Yeah Let's skip around tell you They say there's got to have something to do while he's away a spare time and see that Don't take up too much space. Yeah. Well, I guess it beats bike racing. I'll see you do sick I went to town today looking for nothing but a change of scene in a chubby blonde with C and what happens Yeah, well, that's fine. I'll take a look at my bed and think some a college professor doing research I couldn't tell her out with a blowtorch. Yes One runs for life because she takes me for a judge and after that I'm just getting around wait a minute. Hold it Hold it. No, sir. You say judge Skippy you losing your rudder just the opposite. You've given me an idea that'll work And what two murders a beautiful searing a missing seahorse while but it's beginning to make some sense So long sale Check Nolan's boat yard first, but his offer shack was dark So I drove hard back to 51 Monroe place in the hope that Matthews have been right about jugs destination My ground to a stop. I once again gave thanks for smart cops Jug Nolan was there all the fight gone out of him as he stared without seeing it at the blood spot on the floor Where Paul crater it died I? Asked him one simple question The answer he grunted in three words without so much as looking up, but it made everything fit As I got to the phone. I knew that whatever else he was the old seed dog was no liar Is Marlowe Jill? All depends now listen close. I've got to have some help right away It doesn't matter, but this does get hold of that friend of your stepmother's What's her name of birdie lockfield and both of you meet me at your stepmother's house as soon as you can make it It's important, baby. Don't fail me I understand you wanted our help and a big hurry. We rest madly over. I'm sorry It took longer to get here than I figured what do you want us to do feel catch a thief and a killer You see I'm positive now that whoever got away with that jewel seahorse also held that pillar over Mrs. Demeris face until she died and went on to kill Paul crater and surf side to murder Let's have that advantage, baby for one murder or it doesn't the price is the same I don't understand Marlowe Does the second murder have something to do with my stepmother's death? They follow like links in a change you Lola Demeris called me at four. She was expecting a new lorry at 430 when I got here at five She was dead and the jewel seahorse was gone However, the circumstances indicated that somebody who knew or had done the work then you don't think the new lawyer was the one Oh, but I do think the new lawyer came in just as I did later through the open back door Stood right over there and overheard the entire business. Can you prove all this Marlowe? Not yet But if you found that new lawyer, you could write that new lawyer is gonna turn up soon And when she does we'll have something more. Yeah, she she birdie Lola Demeris new lawyers are woman The distinguished man in suit and van dyke that you shot and killed in surfside was the lady lawyer's brother a seaman Yeah, Jill the new lawyer who witnessed the whole thing decided to move in on it, right birdie But it was blackmail I've got a note in my mailbox from a lawyer named crater accusing me and demanding money and since you were already in so deep You figured another murder wouldn't matter you got the lawyers surfside addressed some way and went there That's why you stumbled birdie over a suit of clothes and a beard Well, you will always best friend you'll never understand you fool You try tomorrow make a move for your gun and I'll put a bullet in her back Demeris best friend. I despised and hated her years I worked in slave for that woman pampering her putting up with her sickness and her temper and her high-handed ways She owed me plenty for those years when it came time to pay the money went to you your cheap little snip You've done nothing for her. You were getting everything stand still my love. I came prepared remember so did I Mrs. Zock fear Ellen crater better drop it birdie You're in the middle listen We can still do business like you said in the no not no sister. You forget three things first You tried to kill me second. You did kill my brother Helen you don't know what you're doing and third the female of the species is always deadlier than the male Matthews that's about it. Yeah What do you think will happen a Helen crater man, that's one. I don't have to figure out She's a lawyer, you know How did you find out she was the lawyer? Well, you see the fact that the new lawyer was nowhere around bothered me Then when I was in that bar in Surfside one sailor with a beard told me been mistaken for a judge So I figured maybe another sailor also with a beard could have been mistaken for a lawyer He's and you work back from that. Yeah, Paul created sister Helen I finally asked Nolan what Helen crater did for a living. He told me you see He was the guy who had recommended Helen in the first place He'd come to see low-law about the boats and found out that she needed a lawyer, right? That's right So he taught some business to Paul created sister. That's how the phone number came on brown cigarette paper You know, I found it on the Sun porch Well, that's it. Yeah Well You're gonna get some coffee. No, no, thanks Matthews Okay, it's hard I think I'll go home It's almost three in the morning Silent sterile hour at the short end of a long long night Everything that happened had been because of a jeweled seahorse An ugly little replica of an ugly little fish But then as I thought about it, I realized that the trouble wasn't because of the seahorse It was because of the people Birdie Lockfield Helen crater Lola Demarest That's always the trouble people to coin a cliche It takes all kinds of people a louse up the world The adventures of Philip Marlowe bringing you Raymond Chandler's most famous character star Gerald Moore are Produced and written by Norman McDonald and written for radio by Robert Mitchell and Gene Levitt Featured in the cast were Stan Waxman and Morrison Ruth Parrot Eileen Prince Ed Begley John Stevenson and Bob Sweeney the special music is composed and conducted by Richard Iran Be sure and be with us again next week when Philip Marlowe says This time all I had to go on was a postmark But that was plenty it led me to a knife between a pair of shoulders a woman with a second hand face in a corpse by a waterwheel There'll be some grand singing on CBS this Wednesday night Bing Crosby will play host to Al Jolson and Ella Fitzgerald and Burns and Allen will entertain lovely Dinosaur Also Groucho Marx will be around with more of his wonderful wit on his quiz You bet your life and of course Dr. Christian will be on hand with another famous story They'll all be heard on most of these same CBS station. So be listening. This is Roy Rowan speaking Now stay tuned for pursuit which follows immediately over many of these same CBS stations This is CBS where Wednesday night is Bing Crosby night the Columbia broadcasting system