 Hello everyone. Welcome to the Narc Survivor Christmas special. Merry Christmas, everyone. I'm not sure what time it is where you are, but I hope you're having a good one. And if you're not, well, I hope I can cheer you up in this video today. And I'd just like to thank you all as well for choosing to join me as I celebrate my Christmas. It's Christmas Day here in Japan. I'm near Kyoto. It's 10pm. I had my vegan Christmas dinner earlier today in Osaka. And I knew I had to get on here this evening as I usually do. I believe I do this every year because I know there's a lot of people out there who are celebrating Christmas alone. I'm also celebrating Christmas alone. This is actually probably the first time that I have been completely alone on Christmas. Of course, for me, it's not really a big deal. I do enjoy being alone. But if there's one thing that I do enjoy more than being alone, it's helping people and just delivering this information, knowing that I'm making a difference in people's lives. So yeah, it brings me joy to get on here, especially on a Christmas day, to bring this information to you. And as you can probably see, all of the Christmas decorations here got a little tree. I didn't do all of this, of course. I just rented this house for one night for Christmas Day because, as I said, I do enjoy my alone time. So I didn't really want to stay at a hotel or a B&B or anything like that. I actually love being alone. It's very rare that I will choose to have any company. It brings me peace when I am alone and I can focus on my work. But enough about me. Let's get into this message because I know many of you out there, you may be going through something. Even though it's Christmas Day, I know a lot of you are dealing with knocks, especially narcissistic family members. Am I right? Yeah, I know that's what a lot of you are dealing with over the Christmas holidays. Right, let's get into this message. I hit that thumbs up button down below. Show me some love, some support. Christmas Day. Yeah, so I don't know what time it is where you are. I'm kind of going off for people in the US or the UK, around that part of the world. Because I'm sure over there it's like morning or lunchtime. So there's still plenty of time for the narcissist to ruin your Christmas. Of course, if you are in Asia or the Middle East, it's probably even in time where you are. So if they haven't ruined Christmas already, they haven't really got much time left because it's almost Boxing Day now. But yeah, if you're in the UK or the US, yeah, there's a good chance that the narcissist is about to ruin your Christmas. And why are they about to do that? Well, it's because narcissists do not like special occasions. And they don't like them because other people like myself or you, we can be happy during these times. During birthdays, Valentine's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Eid, Diwali, whatever it may be. Yeah, we could be happy during these holidays. Narcissists, they can't, they're miserable. And they hate it during these festivities, these celebrations because they know this is a time for people to come together to celebrate and to be happy in a family unit or in a relationship, whatever it may be. And narcissists, they don't want to do that. They don't want to come together. They don't want to be normal. They don't want to be happy because they're miserable. And in their minds, it's unfair. Why should you get to be happy and they're miserable? Because that's just the way they always are. They can never be happy and especially around this time of year. They're so selfish and greedy. It's just always all about them. And of course, when it's Christmas, it's always supposed to be about other people and less about yourself. It's about giving rather than receiving. But as we know, narcissists don't like to give. They just like to take. So of course, this is not their time of the year. Of course, they don't like it. And even if you do have something to give to them, you've got them a nice present. There's always got to be something wrong with it. It's like you should have got them something else. So even if you did get them something thoughtful, they're not really going to appreciate it. They're not really going to say thank you. Or if they do, you can tell they're kind of holding back. They don't really want to give it to you. But then they don't want to look weird in front of everyone else. So they might just say thanks, but they don't really... They don't want to give you any validation or feeling like you've done something for them. So yeah, this time of year, they do not like Christmas. The holidays, because it's a time of giving. They're just all about themselves. They don't want to think about anyone else. They just want to be the center of attention. They want everyone to think about them. They don't want to think about families, relationships coming together. Because they're so selfish. It's just like everything has to be about them. And remember, as I said, they're very low in affective empathy. So they can't really feel or share another person's emotions. But they're high in cognitive empathy. So they can read into your emotions. They know how you're feeling. They know when you're happy around this time of year. And they get jealous. They feel like you're taking something away from them. Because it's like you're happy and they're not. And then they start to feel like they're missing out, but then there's nothing they can do about it. And they're very resistant towards giving without it. Like to where they're in their ego. And it's like, oh yeah, I did this for you. I gave you this. That means I'm special. I'm important. You need me. They can't just give out of the goodness of their hearts. And even receiving around this time of year, they can't receive properly. And actually really appreciate the gift. And say thank you genuinely as though they are actually grateful. And it's like no matter how you try to arrange the celebrations, the festivities, everything can be set out perfectly. You've got the decorations. You've got family, friends coming over the house. The dinner is laid out perfectly. You spent hours preparing it. And you made sure because you know from the previous years they always complained about something. They always find something wrong. So this time you've got it perfectly right. Everything just right. And even if they can't find anything wrong this time, what are they going to do? Of course, they will bring up something from last year. They'll be like, oh, at least you didn't do it like this. Like you did last year. And it's like, can't we just enjoy it this time? Yes, okay. Maybe I burned the potatoes last year. But this time I didn't. I cooked them perfectly. Everything was perfect this time. You're still going on about last year. And it's like, just give me a break. They always find something to nitpick about. They're always fault finding. It's like, no matter what you do, you can just never satisfy them. Even if you get everything right this year, I guarantee they'll be going on about something that happened last year. Or maybe something happens in the family with your auntie, your uncle, your nephew, your cousin, whoever it is. Something happened with them, with the family, a family friend, whoever it is. And although you've worked so hard to make this Christmas right, to make them happy this time, then they're going off about that and it's just distracting. And take the attention away from everything you worked so hard on this time because they just don't want to give you that. They don't want to make you feel like you got it right. They don't want to give you any validation. They just don't want you to feel good about yourself because they look at it like, what's the point in complimenting you, giving you praise, giving you the recognition that you deserve. But I'm still going to be measurable no matter how much recognition I get. They just can't be happy any time of the year. And of course, Christmas is no different. In fact, it can be a lot worse. Christmas Day, who knows what they will do. They might steal from you. They might cheat on you. And they may do it deliberately. I mean, that's the typical thing that narcissists will do around the holidays. They will cheat because they get very insecure. It's like, they know they can't be who you need them to be. They can't be a loving, caring partner. So they start to feel very insecure and they start looking for validation elsewhere. And also you might have said or done something that they took the wrong way. They took it as a slight. You injured them maybe unknowingly. And this could have happened months ago. But they will wait it out until Christmas Day just so they can cheat on you or do something really hurtful to punish you. Yes, that's how crazy they are. Anything just to ruin your Christmas. It's like you can't depend on anyone these days. Remember friends, your partner. And you know, let's talk about my own experience as well. Today, Christmas Day. I was in Osaka. I had a Christmas dinner. Vegan Christmas dinner. It's like everyone like pretends like, yeah, we care so much. We hope you enjoy your meal. I hope it's good for you. And I'm just thinking, I know no one really cares. Christmas is the same as any other day. But in fact, people are even more fake on Christmas. No one really cares. I mean, come on, let's be real. People say, Merry Christmas. They don't really mean it. They don't really care that much about you. It's just something they say. That's all that it is. The world is so fake. And these holidays, it's all just, it's a business. They make money out of it. They don't really care about you at all. Not saying there's to hurt anyone's feelings. As you know, I am a truth teller. I'm just bringing the truth. And let's be real, the truth is, Christmas, Valentine's Day, Easter, Thanksgiving, all of these holidays, they're so fake. They really are. I mean, most people these days, no one really cares about anyone. All they care about is just attention, validation. They just care about themselves. What are they getting out of it? They're not really that concerned about giving, sharing. They're not really concerned about love. Ain't that the truth? I mean, of course it's the truth. I've just started this live video this evening on Christmas Day. I mean, right now we've got 102 live viewers. You all know what it's like. People are so fake. Why do you think I had some boy like myself? I rented this house in Japan. I'm all on my own. Got the decorations everywhere, the lights, the Christmas tree. Got a nice warm bed upstairs. I'm sleeping alone tonight. No one's in my bed. No one's coming over. And even when I had my Christmas dinner earlier, I ate it alone. And I made sure I got there early. Before all of the families and everyone gets there. Because I just can't stand to see it. I mean, if it was actually real, people are actually happy for real, and they're not hiding anything. They actually care about each other. They love each other. You know, I actually love that. I love to see that. I love to see families who actually care about each other for real. There's nothing that warms my heart more than that. Because that's what I've known growing up. That's what I've seen. When I was a child, I was about five years old. And a church minister moved in next door with his wife. It's an elderly couple. They were in their late 70s when they moved in. And yeah, it really seems like they loved each other. They told me they were together since they were in their early 20s. And it seemed like it's just, it's all they've ever known is each other. They never had any other partners. And I really liked that. It was for me, as you may know, with my parents. It wasn't like that at all. And in fact, my parents were divorced when I was just three years old, which of course is very traumatising for a child. But to see the neighbours, the church minister and his wife together in old age, until the very end, until they passed away, and they passed away about 15 years ago, it's a beautiful thing to see a couple that can stay together until the very end. I mean, it's a very rare thing these days. Divorce is so common. So yeah, I'm just saying, you know, of course, I mean, it's a part of my work that I do support families, healthy relationships. Of course, I support that. But I just can't stand to be around the fake. I just hate it. I really just, I don't like it at all. It's like, well, we just have to pretend. Like this elephant in the room, we just have to sweep it all under the rug and pretend like everything is okay. Why? I'm the type of person where no matter what it is, no matter what's go wrong, it's like, okay, let's just sit down, let's talk about this. Let's talk about what's gone wrong, we can make it better. Why do we just have to pretend like nothing is wrong? And of course, the reason why they do that is because they know, yeah, it could be better for you. You can make things better, but they can't. They can't get better, they can't move on. So they want everything to be fake. They thrive in that, but for you, it's just holding you back. But yeah, here I am. Live on Christmas Day. Live from this house near Kyoto in Japan. And I'm all alone. No family, no friends, no girlfriend. Do I feel lonely? No. Do I feel like I'm missing out on anything? No, because I know it's just all so fake. And I wish that it wasn't. I wish this world was not such a fake place, but it seems like all people want to do is pretend. And you know, people are pretending. Just look at what people have to do to cope. Everywhere you go, you see this club culture. People are out of their minds, drinking alcohol, smoking tobacco, doing drugs, having one-night stands, shopping, excessively gambling, doing all of their stuff, just to numb their minds because they just can't cope with reality. That's what it is. And you see me now. I'm a vegan. I don't drink coffee. I avoid sugary drinks, caffeine, alcohol, tobacco, nicotine, drugs, any addictive substances, anything that numbs, changes, or alters the mind. And I'm just facing reality head-on, confronting my shame, confronting everything I've been through in my life, everything that makes me feel bad about myself, everything that makes me feel like I'm a bad person. I can look back and say, yeah, I did that. I don't have to pretend. I don't have to cover it up and act like I've never done anything wrong, like I'm this perfect person. No, I don't want to do that. I want to be better. I want to be greater. I want to be the best version of myself. And this is the NARC survivor message for Christmas 2023. It's about not pretending, confronting things head-on and just being real. Of course, we can't do that with these NARCs. We can't do that with them at all because you confront a NARC. They won't like it. It'll cause a narcissistic injury and they will get mad. You confront them on Christmas Day. You tell them, it just seems so fake. I just don't like all of this pretending. Then it's like you're trying to ruin their Christmas. It's like, oh, why can't you leave it until after Christmas? Let's just have everything be fake. Let's just pretend. Now, you know what would be a memorable Christmas if everyone just came together around the dinner table and held each other's hands and just looked into each other's eyes and we were like, you know, this relationship, this family, it's pretty fucked up. We've done a lot of fucked up things. We all have. We're all to blame. But let's just confess our wrongdoing, our sin. And let's try to make it better. Let's try to make it right. Because you know what? That is real. That's as real as it gets. But I can promise you, they don't want to do that. They want to keep living a lie. And even if they're not narks, you can't tell them just not to be fake. It's like people are just too sensitive these days. They don't want to be told anything about themselves. People just want to sugarcoat everything and beat around the bush. And that's what I hate about modern society. People can't just say it as it is. Everyone's so sensitive they're getting insulted about stupid things. You know, for me, if I've done something wrong, if people don't like something about me, I hate it when people treat me like a child. I'm a grown adult. I'm 34 years old. Just tell me like it is. If you don't like something, just tell me to my face. There's no need to hide it. I'm a mature adult. I'm not going to get mad about it. I'm not just going to feel like you're out to get me because you've seen something wrong. I know I'm not perfect. I know there's plenty of things that I can improve. And I am doing my best every day trying to become the best version of myself. But this is just how it is. This is the NARC survivor message for a real Christmas. And you know what the most beautiful thing you could do with your family, your friends, your relationship partner, maybe your husband, your wife, especially if they're not NARCs, it's just to be real this Christmas, to be raw. And just to be honest about everything you've done, everything you've been through to confess your wrongdoing and your sin so that you can grow together because you're only as strong as your weakest link. So yeah, we need to strengthen those weak links so we could become better together. And that's really my message for this Christmas. I'm just all about being real. And that's probably why I'm alone this Christmas. And yeah, this is the first Christmas in my life that I have been alone. And it's because at this point in my life, I mean, I'm 34. I just can't be fake anymore. I can't keep pretending. I just have to tell it like it is. And you know what? Most people, they don't like it. They don't want to know. They would rather just live a lie. Well, I can't do that. I just can't. I have to get on here and tell it like it is. Some people aren't going to like it. Others will. And they will gravitate towards me because of it. I really just want people to come together and love each other. Family, friends, husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends. I just want you all to have something real. But the sad reality is... And a lot of you may already know this. And this is why you're walking on eggshells, you sugarcoat things. Because otherwise, you may be thinking, oh, you might end up like me alone on Christmas because no one wants to be around the real, or at least many people don't. They don't want to confront real things. They'd rather just pretend. They'd rather just live a lie. Well, I just can't do that anymore. I've had narcissistic family members, relationship partners, and those of you who are with them this Christmas. I know you can relate. It's more lonely being with them than being alone. Am I right? Because I remember that. I know what it's like to sit in a room with your family or with your relationship partner, and it's like they don't even see you. They're just going on and on about themselves. It's like you might as well just not even be there. I know how it is, but I hope this helps you to know that I hear you, I see you. I know your struggles this Christmas. You know, this video is not just meant to be all happy, laughs and smiles. Just pretend that everything is great. This video is more about keeping it real. Now, that's not to say that I'm not happy. I mean, there's a very different side to me that you don't see outside of these videos. If you're following me on Instagram, my Instagram is Narx Fiverr YouTube. If you're following me on there, you will see a very different side to me. Where there's all of these pictures and videos of my travels and yeah, I am smiling and pretty much every photo on there. And that is actually real. Yes, I am pretty happy with my life. I enjoy travelling, exploring the world, going to mountains, beaches, lakes, waterfalls, temples, all that kind of stuff, being around nature and animals, going to different restaurants, trying different foods, exploring different cultures and traditions. Yeah, all of that makes me really happy and even just delivering this message. I mean, of course I have to be quite serious as I'm delivering it. But when I get off here, I feel really good. I feel like I've helped a lot of people and it makes me smile, it makes me happy. Of course, a lot of you don't get to see that side of me on here too much. In some videos you do, I'm not always so serious. I am actually having a good time, most of the time, when I'm not working. And I think the reason why, the reason why I'm at such a high vibration, pretty much 24 hours a day, I'm always happy, I have tons of energy. I mean, today, I must have spent like six, seven hours in the car driving. I've been driving nonstop, travelling all over Japan. Before that, I travelled all over Taiwan, Vietnam, Malaysia, Sri Lanka, being everywhere and it's like at the same time, I'm doing these videos all the time. Sometimes I do an hour long video, 90 minutes, and I do a lot of other work outside of that. You don't see it as well. I do have tons of energy, I never run out of energy. I have to take a tranquilizer every night just so I can fall asleep. Because I have so much energy, I never get tired. And I believe that the reason why is because I'm not living a lie. I'm not living a fake life. I keep things real. I confront things exactly as they are. I don't hide anything from anyone. Everyone knows exactly who I am. I present myself authentically and I confront my own problems, my own shame. I don't try to part it off under someone else. If there's something that I feel bad about, I feel bad about myself. I feel like I'm a bad person. I'm not going to put that under someone else. No, I will confront that myself. That's what it means to be a leader, a role model, an alpha male. We don't deal with any bullshit. We don't play any games. We're direct. We're upfront. We're honest. We deal with things head on. That's what it's about. And that's exactly what I do and that's why I have tons of energy. My energy is unlimited. It really is. I've jogged up mountains and it's taken me 30 minutes, one hour, not even out of breath. Bare even sweating. That's how much energy I have. And then even after that you may have seen on the way back I do a live video for like an hour, 90 minutes. And even then it's like only 2, 3 o'clock in the afternoon. The day's just beginning. 34 years old I've got more energy than a 10 year old child. And I haven't even been to the gym I've probably been maybe once or twice this year because I've been so busy with travelling. But I'm not proud of that. I mean I do need to be going to the gym more often. But yeah enough about me. Let's take a look at this live chat. As I said Christmas it's about togetherness coming together. So what kind of Christmas special would this be? If I didn't go for the live chat read out some comments and respond. I want everyone to feel heard, seen and loved this Christmas. And if you don't feel that way already then let me share some of my time my energy with you right now. Let's see what people are saying. Anisha says Merry Christmas Mark Survivor and all the survivors and thrivers. Thank you Anisha Merry Christmas to you as well. Viva Survivor says Strong Chi Energy Yeah that's right it's that Chi. You've got to have that Chi. It's like from Dragon Ball Z You've got to have that energy and of course it's very important for me as Mark Survivor on this channel to show you that yes even though you may be going through narcissistic abuse smear campaigns gang stalking that doesn't mean that you can't recover and still have unlimited energy. I mean just look at me 34 years old been to the gym like twice in the last year not really proud of that of course been driving all day 6-7 hours I get on here it's almost 11 o'clock at night on Christmas Day doing this video now 48 minutes tons of energy Merry Christmas to you Gail Kirsty Teco says I keep myself my bad things to myself I do not correct others You know I get that but here's how I see it just as this is my personal view I see it as though if I really love someone and if someone really loves me they're going to tell me what they think is bad about me what they think I need to change or improve to me that is love if they just ignore it they're indifferent to it or maybe they hate me they just want to let me go on with what's meant to be wrong or bad then that's no good to me that's what love is to tell someone what you think they need to correct or improve of course that's just my opinion and also that's my personality as well that you may be different maybe you just don't like to correct other people I understand that but if you don't let them know then maybe nothing will ever change of course if you're dealing with a narcissist you're pretty much wasting your time trying to correct them anyway they know exactly what they're doing they have no intentions of changing the best thing to do is just get away from them and go no contact because they're always going to manipulate you and make you think that they're going to change even though they have no intentions of doing that they're quite comfortable with the way things are they're comfortable laying in their own filth Merry Christmas to you as well Keith Keith says I know that the knocks will do all they can to make sure none of us have a great day but make the most of the day definitely everyone here make the most of the day don't let these knocks get you down Kirsty says I hate when people are something they are not that when we would be flying the wall they yell and scream in closed doors exactly that's very true people present this outer image it's like everything's perfect we've got the perfect relationship really I mean as Dr Ramney said the more perfect a relationship looks like on social media the more toxic it's likely to be in real life and I'm sure many of you will recognise that from your own relationship maybe your own family as well in the pictures everything looks so perfect in real life behind the scenes it's nothing like that they're always yelling and screaming complaining about something it's just so fake and they don't want to do the work to actually make it real for real that's the sad thing about it Suzanne says Christopher your channel has been a big blessing to me thank you Suzanne I'm glad to hear that I appreciate the kind words I don't know what time it is where most of you are good Christmas I hope you've had a good Christmas if it's coming to an end where you are right now I mean here it's bedtime now 11pm but if it's not over for you yet I really hope that this video is helpful I hope it brings some good vibes to you just by keeping it real talking about things as they actually are and you know that's what it's really about is although other people they may not be willing to confront things as they actually are just as long as you can be aware of it you can know what is true in your heart that doesn't mean you have to be down you have to be miserable you can still be happy you can still find joy I mean for me that joy that love that can't even exist unless there is truth and acceptance that's why with these narks it's just a fake love because there is no truth or acceptance they're in denial but once you practice that radical acceptance you will find true love and joy within yourself and you will find joy in the little things in life do you know that everything is bad about Christmas I mean of course I like Christmas trees I like the lights I enjoy good Christmas food as long as it's vegan for me those of you you enjoy a roast dinner it's good good for you enjoy it I haven't always been a vegan I used to love roast dinners myself so I don't want to take anything away from you I want you to enjoy your Christmas but I think it's also good to have that awareness and that acceptance that yeah it is pretty fake and not just Christmas just this world in general it is fake people are fake but with this knowledge maybe it can help other people to be more real those who are ready or it can help us to gravitate towards those who are real instead of pretending lying, deceiving or being in denial so that's really the message that I want to end with yeah here's my little Christmas tree Christmas 2023 with nark survivor standing next to his little tree smiling peace everyone go to finish it in a positive way because it is Christmas I don't know it's very rare you don't always get to see me smile so I want to make an effort in this one just to make sure I'm bringing the good vibes to you and yeah I'm gonna get some sleep wake up early tomorrow continue with my travels I'm gonna go to Kyoto not far from there right now and yeah there is a video premiere as well beginning in three hours I mean I'm sure many of you will be busy with your Christmas but if you have some time check out the premiere and of course I'll be back again tomorrow with another live video you can let me know how your Christmas went in tomorrow's live video where you can drop a comment down below I'll probably be reading it in the morning it's 11pm here right now and if you enjoy this Christmas special with me nox survivor or Christopher it's my real name if you enjoyed it please give it a thumbs up down below it helps the youtube algorithm to get this message out there to other survivors as well and hit the subscribe button click all notifications so that you will be notified when I upload a video in the future and you can also follow me on Instagram it's nox survivor youtube I've got new pictures and videos of my travels that I post every day on there alright so thank you all for joining me this is nox survivor coming from this house live in Japan with this little Christmas treaty here wishing you all a merry Christmas and a happy new year although I will talk to you again before the new year I'll be live again tomorrow thank you all for joining me merry Christmas everyone have a great day talk to you soon