 Crime and Peter Chambers Created by Henry Kane transcribed and starring Dane Clark a private investigator duly licensed and duly sworn Peter Chambers you're a private eye That's your business Anything else? That's for laughs A lot of laughs tonight You were pub-crawling doing the visiting farm and bit at the taverns and the beast roads You're on your way home now, and you're gonna stop off at Krause's new stand for the papers Old man Krause. He's been there as long as you can remember And then you see the commotion Somebody's working the old man over beating him to the ground you get there as fast as you can Oh, it's you mr. Chambers think the easy easy does it mr. Krause Come on, let me help you up Did you see him mr. Chambers? Did you see what was no he ran off as he saw me coming Did you get a look at him mr. Krause? No, I was just closing it me from behind and then he jumped me But why you where does a man like you fit in with a beating it was smaller than that mr. Chambers more than a beating what are you talking about whoever it was wanted to kill me Why you're a peaceful man mr. Krause the thoughtful peaceful philosophical man everybody loves you Seems not everybody Well look I'm going home with you no no no no I'm taking you home. You need not bother mr. Chambers I am not afraid come along come along. I'm a surprise. Thank you. Thank you. You are very kind He doesn't live far and he's none the worse for his experience You get him home, and he's fumbling with the key and the old-fashioned lock So these old eyes are not what they used to be And then please follow me mr. Chambers. I will put the light But he doesn't have a chance to put the light on neither of you have a chance to do a thing Guy who was inside waiting for Krause He was in a dark room But he was facing the light of the hallway and that was all to the good He couldn't see much of you or of Krause just your silhouettes, but you could see him and better than that You recognized him. Maybe Krause didn't know who his assailant was but you did Now he's gotten clean away, so there's nothing to do now, but find the light switch and look to mr. Krause Come on miss Krause Mr. Krause, all right. Yeah, look I'll get a towel and some water Just a we are sure right there on the floor. I Don't think you're hurt very badly Yeah, it's nothing. It's nothing at all. It's a scratch a bullet crease. You're as good as new Once more, let me help you up be my guest Lucky pretty lucky twice in one night, and I'm still around to talk about it. I will sit here Why somebody should want to kill me? Maybe a month ago, but not now that a month ago. What you ever hear of big Benny Larson Who hasn't big Benny big goon? Well, there was a fight one night in front of my newsstand Big Benny knife-to-man a mr. Snuff knows on cheleno. I saw it all Oh, my mr. Snuff knows was in the hospital, and they were wondering whether he would live the police assigned Protection to me because I was the only witness Then mr. Snuff knows pulled through and he didn't press charges and big Benny was released and the protection of police was taken away There's no reason anymore for big Benny to harm me Then who else I have no idea mr. Chambers look You ever hear of the dancer the dancer slick hood from Chicago. His name is dancing or something But they call him the dancer. I have never been to Chicago, mr. One of those tall slender handsome guys Beautiful, but deadly is the front end of a loaded gun Murder that one for the ladies, but what does this have to do with nothing nothing nothing just started a train of thought Now look mr. Krauss you're going to the police with this. No, no, no, I've had enough away I have a gun and a license and I I am not afraid It is only that I do not understand it. Do you have a family mr. Krauss just a daughter an adopted daughter Irene She is married now to a lawyer Frank Buckley. Well, you're going to tell her about this No, why not? Well, they are not really friends anymore. She has gone away from me. I Hardly see her anymore Well, you mind if I talk with her well, I cannot stop you. Oh, that's sort of wraps it up. I suppose Look, I'm getting out of here mr. Krauss But you bolt that door after me and use that gun if you have to thank you Thank you very much mr. Chambers and please do not worry about me But you do worry You go home and you try to sleep, but it tampers with your dreams Where's the connection? Why should a doll boy like the dancer be looking to eradicate a peaceful citizen? The old man said he never heard of him and you believe Krauss You sleep finally, but it's like sleeping under a winking neon light And in the morning you're looking up in a dress in the phone book Frank Buckley It's on 57th Street and it turns out to be a combination of home and office a Lawyer that's plugging at his business nothing more. No rich big estate guy. Yes, mr. Chambers. Please sit down make yourself comfortable Frank Buckley bald thin angular Fifty-ish a lot of loose skin hanging under his jowls. Would you like a cigarette mr. Chambers? No, no, thank you not now Mr. Buckley, it's really your wife. I want to talk to so why well, sir. I'm a private detective private detective This is not in the line of business. I'm a friend of an elderly gentleman a mr. Krauss. Oh, yes, yes My wife's father. Well an attempt was made on his life last night He won't go to the police with it and I thought perhaps if I talk with Krauss's daughter your wife My wife and I have been separated for the past six months. She's already instituted of all proceedings. I'm sorry to hear that I'm in a matter like this She's now living at Eastburn apartments on 74th. Thank you, sir. How is the old man? Working as always well, he won't have to work long. He'll be quite independent a shot. Oh Man Krauss independent. You mean rich or something. How come I'm sorry slip of the tongue sir a matter of my profession attorney and client Privilege okay, okay with me all I wanted to know is where I could reach Irene Mrs. Buckley. Yes, of course, and if there's anything I can do for the old gentleman, please don't hesitate all right then Good morning, mr. Buckley and a very good morning to you, sir Next stop Eastburn apartments not too swanky not too slummy about in the middle But the occupant of apartment 7g Nothing in the middle about that one The word is gorgeous Not soft gorgeous or mushy gorgeous, but hard like granite glittering gorgeous like a diamond But gorgeous nonetheless Well, ain't you the handsome one Mrs. Buckley, I'm using my maiden name Irene Cordoni. I thought it was Krauss Chilipin, but it ain't I was in show business before I got married How would you like this and now ladies and gentlemen miss Irene? Krauss Black hair black eyes in the loose red mouth young and quite a figure She's wearing high-heel lounging shoes white shorts And a white bandana and that's about it Like a drink, mr.. Mr. Chambers Peter Chambers Like a little drinky handsome. Well, it's a little too early in the morning for me. Oh Look, uh, miss Cordoni. Mm-hmm. I wish you talked to your father father. Oh What's with him a couple of attempts were made on his life last night the old man Somebody somebody near to him or to tell him one of two things like what? Either he goes to the police or he kind of stays holed up at least until this thing clears What's your interest from a friend? Well, if you're such a good friend, why don't you tell him? I've told him but he's stubborn stubborn with you stubborn with me Furthermore the old man and I well we kind of don't see eye to eye anymore What'd you see him last? I haven't seen him Well, since I broke up with my husband maybe six months been in Chicago Maybe five months of that only up back a few weeks ago. I still think you ought to talk to him Quite a busy body aren't you? Well some say yes some say no But you're cute. I'll say that You know, I'm a sucker for a good-looking man Are you sure you won't join me in a drink? Some other time sister. Oh make it soon brother Sure sure. I'll be expecting you a Man-eater that Irene Cordoni Buckley cross You take your leave slightly reluctant, but you take your leave You figure you've done your bit and you've got your own work to attend to Like pulling open the office window and letting the air in and looking over the mail But you need tour to pick up the papers at crosses But crosses newstand is closed So you're on your white horse again making for crosses apartment Come in mr. Chambers just got back myself Where have you been mr. Krauss a funeral funeral the old lady Regina Kent You must have known the old lady Regina Kent her funeral. Yeah Well, look you can't take that so hard. She must have been past 90 years of age Death must come mr. Krauss sooner or later sure but not by murder murder The old lady look you're not making sense. Mr. Krauss. It is sense. I wish it wasn't one that happened a couple of days ago She was coming from the movies bang Shots in the head you mean a mugger a thief one of those things nothing was stolen. She was killed the kind old lady Killed meaningless for no reason She was a good friend of yours wasn't she mr. Krauss. Yes. Yes 20 years. She is a customer a many evenings We talk and talk for hours a fine wonderful old lady and rich too Reputed to be worth though. Maybe half a million riches my boy is in the heart. It doesn't hurt in the pocketbook either That is too too. Hey, wait a minute. You're not quite as impractical as you sound Didn't you once tell me that you recommended a lawyer to her if she didn't think you had a practical size? She wouldn't have asked your advice for a lawyer. Yes. Yes. It's a long time ago Recommended my son-in-law Frank Buckley, and she was very satisfied the main disclaim all the way till now What about your problem mr. Krauss problems me well last night Crazy people crackpots somebody must be making a mistake. Oh, look, you're not going back to work. Are you sure? I'm not afraid mr. Chambers not at all and do not worry. You see I Carry, how do you call it the neutralizer? I have it from the first warrior And you're not going to talk to the cops about it. No, no do not worry about old Krauss You are a good kind man mr. Chambers So The good kind man starts minding his own business You go to the office and pull up the window and let the air in and read your mail Then you listen to the ballgame Then you call downtown to headquarters to detective the tenant Parker But they tell you he's out of town and we'll be back until 10 in the evening client falls in and you're busy for the rest of the day and Pretty soon. It's nighttime after 10 and you're at headquarters because that Krauss thing is buzzing around in your head like it's a beehive Yeah, I'll always a pleasure mr. Private. I you bring the breath of springtime into this dank old office, sir Is that the breath of scotch? Detective lieutenant Louis Parker aces all the way good friend good cop good companion Seriously Pete you look a little worried something I can do for you maybe just tell Papa Parker Anything to get the creases out of your forehead Old man Krauss guy owns a new stand-up your way. Yeah, is he got anything to fret about like what big Benny Larson or his goons? No, not a thing Snuff knows Angelina was a rabbit afraid to sign a complaint What's big Benny in the clear and Benny's not looking to make trouble for the old man? But he makes trouble only when he has to That's one worry off my mind. Oh you got more Got a little curiosity fire away friend Regina Kent Little old tame 90 years of age gets knocked off with a bullet in her brain and strictly a professional job Real peculiar deal has it got any angles now not yet It ain't unless you call baffle meant an angle when you got an idea about the torpedo We got better than that got a full and perfect description now What's holding your back? I haven't got anybody that fits the full and perfect description This is confidential Pete of course Louie we got a witness to that Regina Kent killing that nobody knows about not even the newspapers Lady by the name of Benson Benson She was sitting in her bedroom. It was dark. She couldn't sleep happens to have the next apartment of this Regina Kent She saw our torpedo saw him clear and saw him long He was hanging around for quite a time waiting for the old lady Mrs. Benson kept watching him then when Regina Kent appeared she saw the actual shooting saw him jump into a car and Drive off and she looked over your rose gallery looked over everything most cooperative Furnished us a full description ready to identify the guy whenever we pick him up Let's hear that description Louie. Well, he's a good-looking boy about six feet Parker talks and your heart starts rapping at your chest like a fist on a door because what you're listening to is a perfect description of the dancer I wonder they can't find a guy to fit the description This is a Chicago guy a guy who was never arrested never printed never mugged What are you getting excited about PD stick around pal? Why I may be of some help So why should I stick around? Why shouldn't I go with you because that's the way I wanted this trip? Oh the private eye and his various moods Okay, detective. I stick around. What do I stick around for phone call from me? I'll like a little more dope. I'd love a little more dope your friend Krause He's gonna be rich. That's a second time. I've heard that this time. It's authentic Regina Kent made a will she leaves all her dough to charity except $200,000 I guess who gets that I give up. Oh man Krause. Yeah 200,000 solid smackers, but remember it's still confidential Will ain't been probated yet. We got to see it on police business. He has gotta be a lawyer, huh? Who made that will for who was a lawyer? Gavin them Frank Buckley. That's it. Goodbye, Louie. Hey, what's your hurry? Where are you going? So back to 57th Street your house Frank Buckley out of his dreams and you set him up on the facts He tries to make with the legal plover, but you shake him out of it and finally you throw him the jackpot question Did your wife know about Regina Kent's will well On answer me mr. Buckley. Yes. Yes. I told her when the old lady originally made the will I thought it pleased her to know that someday her foster father after all she was my wife, then we were living together husband and wife Next up Eastburn apartments and the lady herself answers She's wearing tight silk slacks and a tight silk block in her hands You shove in before she's got a chance to shove you out Easy you asked me to come back remember you said you'd be expecting me Well, you're a little premature sweetie right now. I'm expecting my future husband the dancer I'm well. He sent me with a message messages messages. He's do her any minute and he sends me Hey How do you know about the dancer? What are you doing here anyway catching up with a little hunk of murder out? Lady you'll get up before I fling this glass you'll fling what? She misses but it gives you the excuse to do what you were going to do anyway You clip her under the chin not too hard just enough and she sighs and slides to the floor Then you go into action with the adhesive bit The underworld teaches the upper world a lot of little tricks You find the tape in the medicine cabinet and you wrap her wrist behind the tire ankles tight and put a gag across her mouth You carry it to the bedroom and lock the door and then you're back in the living room And you're waiting for a murderer You open the door for the dancer and you hit him first And you pull him in afterwards Then you take his gun away from him and you slap him back the consciousness. What come on there? Nothing nothing except a little chit chat before you get hauled off First police headquarters and after that there's a hot little chair up at sink sink. Why are you careful fella careful? You're looking at your own gun and I take it. It's loaded Who the devil are you on a busy body by the name of chambers? Nemesis to you So what's it all about one the murder of an old lady? Regina Kent To the attempted murder of old man kraus. Yeah nuts. I got a witness by the name of benson says I ain't why should I want to bump an old woman? All right, let me tell you A doll by the name of Irene Cordoni shows up in chicago a few months ago. She goes for good-looking guys and you're a good-looking guy You're also a hard guy and she makes you a proposition like what like this She knows from her former husband that an old lady made a will leaving 200,000 clamps to old man kraus Kraus happens to be this doll's foster father. He's got no other family but her So if the old dame regina kent if she dies Old man kraus gets 200,000, but If after that he dies dear old Irene Cordoni kraus She inherits from him So the doll propositions the dancer knock the two of them off in that order first the old dame Then the old man then the doll and the dancer get married and they live pretty good And they can pay their rent for quite a while with 200,000 dollars. Yeah, good story, but go prove it Don't start bullying me about no benson who's a witness. I'm bullying you kiddo. I'm sure I'm bullying you Let me show you how I'm bullying you see First you pull a phone over like so Then you dial o for operator like so Then you say like so into the phone Police quickly And so a few days later you're back at kraus's newsstand You see mr. Chambers. I do not wear the gun anymore Well, there's no need And I see by your papers that the grand jury's already indicted those two first degree murder People are so crazy You uh Gone to retire on the 200,000 me retire I die No Maybe a few vacations perhaps but kraus works kraus loves to work By the way, mr. Chambers, there would be a fee for you. Certainly you did fine work You will send a bill, huh? Send a large. No, no, no bill mr. Kraus. This one was on the house Tired Think I'll take the news and mirror and sew to bed with the news and bureau And there you've had crime and peter chambers Dane clock was starred as peter chambers Crime and peter chambers transcribed was created and written by henry king Others in the cast were bill zuckert heard as lieutenant parker Guy rep as kraus and rita lin as Irene It was directed by fred way And this is fred collins inviting you to tune in next week same time same station for dane clock in crime and peter chambers Crime and peter chambers has come to you through the worldwide facilities of the united states armed forces radio and television service